Never the Final Word (Vol. 2)

by FanOfMostEverything

Brumby_Run's Almost Good (Estee's "Mint Condition")

Author's Note:

[Comedy][Slice of Life]

This is a continuation of Estee's Mint Condition (6,917 words, [Comedy][Slice of Life])

MINT SPOILERS IN BAG: Celestia and Luna seek to break the latter's more-than-millennial absence from the nation's currency, and thus commission's Equestria's greatest living artist. Unfortunately, said artist achieved that state by falling into the mark, entering a monomaniacal state in which his cutie mark rules rather than guides him. Getting him to understand that images like a focus on Luna's hindquarters or a depiction of her tearing souls out of their bodies is inappropriate for currency doesn't go well. His final offering is an exquisite portrait of Luna. He even invented lenticular art to show a second image on the same side of the coin... namely, one of Nightmare Moon. As Luna literally storms off, Celestia thanks him for his services before teleporting him home with all due haste.

Celestia wandered back through the courtyard, following the scorch marks of the lightning strikes. She found Luna sitting on a patch of grass, watching the oncoming twilight.

"I've thought about possible alternatives to hiring another artist," Celestia said.

"Do tell," Luna gloomily replied.

"As the Minotaurs were inventing photography, their first attempts produced a monochromatic image. Modern newspapers now use a variation of this process to avoid the expense of full colour printing."

"Photography?"

"The first images were produced on metal plates treated with luna caustic, silver nitrate in the modern parlance. Almost any engraver should be able to convert such an image to a die suitable to strike coins."

"Silver nitrate photography," Luna replied. "An appealing process to consider. However, let us NOT employ the greatest engraver alive to carve the die. I have a great desire to only deal with ponies that are merely competent. Somepony with a spouse, and hobbies. I look forward to dealing with somepony with a lackadaisical attitude towards their profession."

"I shall scour the nation for the most mediocre photographer and engraver possible," Celestia smirked.

"What image should we choose for the reverse side?"

"Perhaps, after the photograph of your portrait is complete, we could persuade them to also photograph your tail..."

Celestia managed to dodge the lightning strike, but allowed herself to be overpowered by the tackle in a fit of giggles.