[Comedy][Suggestive Content]
The following is a riff on Estee's blog "Free crackfic idea seeks good home." (532 words, no tags)
BLOG SUMMARY: A fic prompt that proposes that alicorns are ridiculously fertile, with libidos to match. For centuries, Celestia compensated for this through a spell that made the baby somepony else's problem once sperm met egg. Now that the alicorn breeding population has quadrupled, certain complications are bound to arise...
Celestia's eyes were closed. Twilight felt the glare anyway.
"I mean," she heedlessly continued, "there's never been a point in history where two Alicorns have had sex with each other before, right?"
Celestia's eyes remained firmly closed.
"So! There was no way to know that two versions of the spell operating simultaneously would amplify the effect even though both parties were mares, so arguably the fact that Luna and I—I mean, I'm not saying I had sex with your sister just for science, I just meant that science was improved by our actions so they were clearly good—that wasn't the only reason it was good, there's this thing she did with a weather vane that—"
Celestia's face remained a picture of serenity as everything combustible in the room began to smolder.
"...Um," Twilight said after several warm minutes had passed. "The point is that we're very sorry and won't do it again." A pause. "Get everyone in the castle pregnant, I mean. Not stop having sex. Did you know sex is great? I mean I knew, intellectually, but now—"
"Twilight," said a very pregnant, very hormonal, and almost forcefully composed Celestia began. "Take the year off. Go on a vacation to Saddle Arabia. I'll cover it."
Twilight blinked. "...Really?"
"Because if you stay in the same country as me for the next eight months, at some point I'm going to kill you."
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This is your own fault Celestia. You could have just gone with Alicorn-strength contraceptives, or traded your ability to have children to a dark power in exchange for a boon the kingdom. But noooooo...
Marvellous!
Your title is better than Estee's.
Shouldn't it be more like eleven months?
10214546
I suspect it's been a few months since the act, and Celestia only just determined the nature of her personal problem.