• Member Since 11th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen Nov 19th, 2020


Just a nice, polite Canadian.


While strolling around town, Twilight Sparkle accidentally knocks out Derpy's contact lenses, revealing perfectly normal eyes hidden underneath.

So what else could Derpy be faking?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 180 )

Unusually tame by your standards, no?

Still lot of fun. And Derpy's alias is a good enough Awesome McCool name.


Oh my gosh, this is priceless!


Hilarious! I enjoyed this quite a bit. It makes me wonder what her real cutie mark could be.

Great story.

Brilliant work. Had me laughing in tears the whole time. :rainbowlaugh: Brilliant as per usual.

Could read this all day :twistnerd: 10/10 Would read again.

I guess there’s not really much to say—good read. :yay:

This is brilliant. Great work!

Made me chuckle.

I recall something similar to this, though it wasn't Derpy faking it, it was just that everyone assumed she was dumb because of her clumsiness.

My answer to the summary's question would be rated T.

What about the Doctor?



I suspect my immediate response was similar to yours.

Maybe Derpy is a benefit fraudster?

Damnit Science Derpy is so cute! :rainbowkiss:

Also, Derpy is a GENIUS!? ..Kinda makes sense though.

Doctor Who? :pinkiehappy:.....:pinkiesad2:.....:applecry:

Ah, the problem of being too smart... I don't know it at all.

This was a GREAT story, but...( pause for deep breath ) I want my Derpy back!!

Welp, that certainly worked out far better than expected :rainbowlaugh:

Well, that was entertaining. Thanks for the read. :twilightsmile:

Maybe she's also faking her...

natural birth.

I will have to agree it does take a genius to truly act dumb. Did I ever tell you guys about the time that I used 29 rolls of tape to make a tape ball and then hammered 500 Nails into it.




Let's not go there.

Hmm. Fun. Not quite as outrageously funny as I expected, but it goes in a more serious direction and makes it work.

wow, reading this actually felt like an episode. :derpytongue2:

Derpy Hooves would actually need to be some sort of genius in order to do the damage that she does… with no causalities, of course.”

Ain't that a fact! Ever hear someone that's bad at playing a violin and then listen to a violinist that plays in a symphony play badly? The person that doesn't know how to play is a LOT less excruciating!

7394021 She's been scamming Equestrian Welfare to the tune of hundreds of millions of bits! :derpyderp2:

Estuve interesante esta historia te felicitó

Princess Twilight Boring Sparkle

“It’s ‘I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion’

Alondro just smiles... "Lions are very lazy. They naturally do as little as is necessary to live. If they decide to suddenly wake up and lead, you should also ask yourselves, who's the one rousing the lion? That creature is the one to truly fear."

Great story, but I have one problem with it. From the episode, "what about Discord" we know that Twilight, hates to be out of anything. And in the episode, she was only gone from her friends for 3 days. Now she wants 3 weeks vacation? I don't think so. Plus Spike needs to "disappear" for that amount of time, or else he might blab. Like I said, great story, but I over analyze too much.

I'm reminded of a certain story about when ponies get to be too smart.

Also, I feel the overwhelming urge to write The Search for Fluffy-Butt Von Corkscrew McHammermaster the Third.

they made an artificial pony to answere all the question and help the others along so they don't have to ?

That's a common theme in stories featuring Derpy, I think. In those stories she can vary between 'normal intelligence' to 'pretty smart' usually.

The stories where she's looked down on and assumed to be dumb by the population at large generally paints the average pony as being kind of a dick. I mean, it sort of implies that that ponies at large are incredibly superficial and judgmental. Basically, it paints them as being pretty close to humans in that respect. I mean, it's sort of a given that stories that portray (a usually sweet) Derpy as being dismissed at best, and bullied and unloved at worst, would give a rather bleak view of things.

Offhand, the best example I can think of for this (because unfortunately there aren't enough Derpy stories out there IMO), is: Address Unknown, which is a Twi x Derpy fic. In spite of the slightly odd pairing, it works quite well and I rather liked it (it has some nicely done optional clop as well, if you're into that).

Seriously though, I'd pay to read more decently written Derpy romance stories, especially HiE. I searched, there don't seem to be any decent-length (like 30K+ words) Derpy x Human stories, and that rather surprised me. There probably are a decent number of Derpy x *InsertPony* fics out there, but the only ones I'm aware of are the aforementioned Address Unknown and The Mailmare and I.

There is also the slight possibility you might have been thinking of Lyra's Human 2: Derpy's Human. I don't think so though.

7394725 .....Do it. I want to know how the FUCK someone gets that name.....

This is great! I especially liked the parallels between Twilight and Derpy's situations. I had a good laugh with this one; good work!
You know, there's a certain irony in you, naturalbornderpy, writing a story called "Derpy's Faking It", isn't there?

That is the best read I've had in awhile! I agree it could be an episode, very interesting. Keep up the GREAT work.

Why Ponyville’s only mailmare even needed a mailbox was anyone’s guess, but Twilight decided to let it go before a headache could start to form deep within her skull.

She keeps muffins in it, of course.

This was amazing.

... admittedly that's a little hyperbolic, but I was laughing like a loon by the end, so whatever. Great job! :derpytongue2:

7394725 My thoughts exactly, but I couldn't remember the name of the story. Glad that you did.

Oh, I love it when stories subvert character clichés like this one does...

This was certainly an interesting interpretation of her.

I personally prefer the "smart, well-meaning, yet occasionally messes up" version of her, but that's more due to my familiarity with that one over anything else.


Hands down one of the best authors on the site, making another top-knotch chart-topper. Amazing as always NBD. Fun, adorable while maintaing the usual brilliance that is your writing! :twilightblush:

This was fun, but now I want to see a sequel in which Twilight realizes she can't be irresponsible all the time and helps Derpy balance things out a bit more.

Rarity’s face flushed crimson. “Well, we were only wondering if you wanted to accompany us with a problem that’s just cropped up outside of Ponyville, but…” She chewed on her tongue for a moment. “You know what, Twilight? I think we got this one. You just feel better and have some fun with Derpy today. Sound good? We’ll stop by some other time, then.”

and so five went, but only one managed to return safe later tell tale....

"That means I’m legally required by the Smart Ponies of Equestria Coalition to invite you in for fresh tea and scones."

What the...how does an organization like that get started? What is its purpose? Who else might secretly be a member? :pinkiehappy:

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