• Member Since 24th Sep, 2017
  • offline last seen 43 minutes ago

CommanderApplejack


"Today the enemy will hear the roar of humanity, and they will fear us." -Colonel Akono Menteith, 53rd armor division

T

Research log #579

It's been over one and a half years ago since the last activation of the device, though the magical signature hasn't changed it seems... weakened, to such a degree that the re-activation is impossible.

As described in the notes of research log #249 any attempt at providing the device an artificial source of magic to power failed, the device simply needed more energy than even the combined magical power of both Princess Luna and Celestia were capable of providing. You must be wondering now, I've already described these circumstances in previous logs so why bring it up now?

Simply said I'm out of options, every attempt of reactivating the device have failed and I'm only left with a single choice. I'm going to have to reverse engineer the device in an attempt to understand the mechanics with which it operates...

...At the risk of maybe never being unable to reconstruct it later.

I'm so sorry Fluttershy, I never should have involved you or any of the girls in the exploration of this structure. I hope that if we ever see you again you can find it in yourself to forgive me.

-Twilight Sparkle


In the true sense of Mass Effect, this story will be CYOA (Choose Your Own Adventure) giving you the reader the choice to decide the action of our protagonist. :twilightsmile:

I hope you enjoy!

Every chapter past chapter 27 was edited by gerandakis :twilightsmile:

Chapters (63)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 744 )

It’ll be interesting to see if Fluttershy ever goes to Tuchanka. I wonder what she will make of the Thresher maws.

This seems like an interesting idea, let us see how it turns out. Fluttershy is not normally the one that gets sent on these sorts of adventure.

Tracking Beacon activated. There's not enough of these ME crossovers

Edit: Make sure you link the Vote link instead of the results link.

I'd say, I'm not quite well versed on Mass Effect, but stories of this kind have almost always catched my attention. Will certainly read more of this.

Can't say I've participated in a CYOA type of story before, but I suppose it will be fun.

Okay, so let me see what we have here ... the conduit is in Equestria ... for some reason ... and activated, bringing Fluttershy to the Citadel ... again, for some reason ... hmm ... mildly contrived, but using in-universe elements to set up a crossover usually is ... now that the setup is done ... we shall see ... I wonder if you'll go with a male or a female Shepherd ... and I wish you good luck and great endurance if you choose not to clarify (writing like that is hard!)

Now:

the fashionista's eyes going whose as she too felt

'the fashionista's eyes going wide as she, too, felt'

a dull thumb could be heard

a thumb is a finger ... I suspect you mean the noise instead. That would be a 'thump'

Wrex had told her that he was a mercenary and would fought for money

Fight.


Pity your not going with femshep, (love Jennifer Hales voice), but it’ll be interesting to see how Fluttershy’s presence changes things.

Alright ... we'll see where this goes ...

had positioned herself between the newcomers

do you perhaps mean 'between her and the newcomers'?

softly told her lullaby came to an end

told her as her lullaby came to an end

in the wards an all out assault

in the Wards, an all out assault
You also have several other cases of not capitalizing names, such as Geth or Perseus Veil
you also wrote get instead of Geth at one point.

9534204
Yeah, I guess I need to update my grammar program :facehoof:, I'll make sure it's fixed before releasing the next chapter:twilightsheepish:

I thought CYOAs were a literature-only thing.

Auto Spell and Auto Grammar still gets it wrong.

get -> Geth

cashes -> cache(s)

Pacing is Michael Bay level (like watching a movie trailer that's movie length)

Also everyone automatically knows what a MLP Pegasus is? Are they a thing in the galactic codex?

I see somewhat good Mass effect story, my brain goes like this:

"You can fight like a krogan, run like a leopard, but you'll never be better than Commander Sheperd!"

9534714

...no matter what scars you bear
whatever uniform you wear...

9534528
You might notice that only the human characters called Shy a pegasus and as for the others; Garrus is C-sec and most likely sees a lot random shit so I don't see him batting an eyelash, Wrex is a mercenary so the same goes for him, and I simply don't see Tali doing anything rash to a creature that's panicking. Though that said, the council might make a slightly bigger deal out of a new species. :ajsmug:

As for the pacing, I inserted Fluttershy right at the end of ME1's first act so that should level out a bit as they get to the Normandy.

you post once a week. is that right

9537034
Right now I'm posting once a day, but that's because I'm sick in bed and have nothing better to do :twilightsheepish:
It'll probably slow down to two or three per week.

There we go ... things are getting interesting ...

about the doctor Chakwas

'about the doctor' or 'about Doctor Chakwas'

that he hadn't heard Shepard say it

she

animals around ponyville

Ponyville

across to Fluttershy

from

That makes it interesting... so pony world is a dextroamino world. That quickly cuts down on extraterrestrial visitors.

k thanks for the heads

she needs a stasis rifle. or a stinger

can i make a suggestion. give her armor.

I personally think that she needs to learn how to use Armors, Weapons and perhaps give her a way to either 1) Reunite with her friends on her mission.
2) Finish the Mission and continue homewards and perhaps have Children as I LOVE hanging around my Family and friends (I can easily pick myself as a Paragon/Protective Family man)
3)She Reunites with her friends on the normandy (Which is my fav ship)

And Fluttershy is technically a 'weak' flyer. Only 2.3 wing power and all that

Not the first story that I’ve read explaining magic as a type of biotics, but it does fit in nicely with the lore of Mass Effect.

9538438
I thought about having magic as a separate thing to biotics but that would've just made a complicated mess while there's a perfectly reasonable explanation within ME's lore.

Hmm yes ... the Stare ... I wonder if it could serve to counteract Reaper Indoctrination...

Fluttershy nodding furiously and started eating faster

those two need to be in the same form. Either 'Fluttershy nodded furiously and started eating faster' or 'Fluttershy nodding furiously and starting to eat faster'

the two were back off to the medbay

either 'the two went back to the medbay' or 'the two were off back to the medbay' but since the trip is so short and they're already there by the time the next sentence happens (which is still in the same paragraph) I'd say the first fits better here

wings, hooves brain and eyes

wings, hooves, brain and eyes

and only other known species

and the only other known species

Just decribe anything

describe

but the one in your eyes don't

the ones in your eyes

9538531
Fixed:twilightsheepish:

As for the stare and indoctrination... I just got an idea I can use later on, danke schön :trixieshiftright:

i like this too much

fluttershy can go faster than dash when fear or rage takes over

9538621
Someone at some point is going to figure that out the hard way

Okay this gets more Cooler every second though....I love this story!

"There's a biotic signature interfering with the translator every time you speak." He told her looking amazed at the pegasus in front of him, "I think you might have natural biotic abilities that are causing this but that kind of control is even beyond what an Asari matriarch could do. Is that everything you can do?"

Biotics? How would biotics, an ability that manipulates mass effect fields, let her understand animals?

Ah, the magic = biotics route. that explains my previous question. New one though, magics tends to break the rules of biotic like a dry twig (teleportation, creating matter out of nothing, healing, transmutation, creation of life and so forth), does this mean the rules of biotics are altered for the purpose of this story?

9539107
Biotics are the result of Eezo creating dark energy which in turn generates mass effect fields. Unicorns for example do this as well with their most basic spell: levitation, but what I propose is using that dark energy not to generate mass effect fields but other effects like advanced unicorn magic, Fluttershy's stare... Reaper indoctrination.

Like I said a bit of headcannon on my part.

Medi-Gel sure is handy ...

for him to do realize that

remove

but with Shephards help

Shephard's

doctor Chakwas

Doctor

9540903
I know how to do combat first aid in current times but medi-gel is ridiculously overpowered so I had to come up with a problem that circumvented it, ergo shrapnel wound:twilightblush:

lol we're pretty unanimous on that top right choice. Going for max Paragon?

I'm sure a lot of you don't know that the top right isn't always the best choice in Mass Effect.

9541005
They'll figure that out soon enough.:trixieshiftright:

9541015
Well I’m currently voting for all Renegade choices I can get. I’m curious to see Fluttershy slowly get corrupted.

Well now ... the stare at full power ... neat ...

She deadpanned

she

the others. who all seemed

others, who all seemed

the concentration Eezo

concentration of Eezo

as she expected a light trickle unaware of what

as he expected a light trickle, unaware of

barely reached above his waste

waist

taking an instinctive step back

took

I voted for fluttershy to look for the liquor because I want to see a drunk Fluttershy. XP

She should talk to joker thats my vote :twilightsmile: it'd probably be hilarious:moustache:

are you okay liara (my vote):scootangel:

I vote 1.

The workshop makes perfect sense. The prologue to Mass Effect 2 basically confirms that the Normandy SR-1 had escape pods accessible through doors hidden behind retractable wall panels. (at least I never saw them in ME1)

not far besides the sleeping krogan

beside, though I would recommend using 'from' instead

Neither Garrus or Ashley

nor

the pegasi's shoulder

pegasus'

your right foreleg

why the right foreleg? the games always show them attached to the left arm.

Its responsiveness

its

the colonist could use a pair of doctors

'colonists' I doubt Shepard expects there to be just one

headed too now

to

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!