Commander
Chapter 71
Commander
Stalk forward to see what they’re exchanging. 57%
After flying up onto one of the containers, Dash silently snuck forward, making sure that, if she was detected and these aliens weren’t guards, she could flee immediately. Blocking out the noise of the aliens a short distance away from her since she couldn’t understand them anyway, Dash studied both the content of the boxes and the aliens who were transferring the items.
The aliens who were dressed in the red armor were mainly of one type, being very large and muscular with a large, bony plate on their foreheads. Most of their armor was visibly scratched and damaged from what Dash guessed were many fights and the logo of a skull with a clenched fist as a lower jaw didn’t exactly give the impression that these guys were up to any good.
On the other side the aliens were much more diverse, although they were all wearing sets of white armor with a three-pointed red logo she couldn’t begin to guess the meaning of.
“The gear is good, we'll take the job. Now we want what you have on Archangel.” One of the large aliens grunted something to the white armored ones who responded by passing along a glass pane of sorts.
Why are those guys giving these giants all this stuff? Dash thought as she compared the massive pile of crates that clearly used to belong to the white armored aliens but now to their red armored counterparts.
“All the details on what the Shadowbroker knows about your quarry and his compatriots. You know the deal. Archangel is yours, but the unique specimen is ours.”
“Yeah, yeah, just make sure you’ve got the rest of the payment ready when we deliver.”
The group looked like they were about to disperse and Dash, not wanting to be caught, slowly snuck backwards only to bump into something. Looking behind her all the color drained from her face. One of the large red giants stood behind her with what looked to be a massive grin plastered on his face.
Rainbow immediately shot up from her position, not giving the alien the opportunity to do anything. Turning to the training she got at the Wonderbolt academy, she opened her wings and sped towards a passage between two containers. Behind her, very loud bangs could be heard and some things whizzed past Dash’s head, impacting the container beside her until she got out of their line of sight.
“Stop shooting! We want that thing alive! We’ll double the bounty!”
Come on you stupid idiot. You should have immediately gotten out of there! Dash chastised herself for a moment but quickly got back to formulating an escape plan as she landed behind a couple of boxes.
If those loud bangs and impacts close to me are any indication, then they have some sort of magical long-range weapons, so flying over the crates is a stupid idea. There doesn’t seem to be air high up that I can fly through.
With her plan of action decided, Dash snuck through the large compound filled with crates, hearing various groups of aliens moving through the alleys of the containers as well. Suddenly another loud bang came from Dash’s right, the painful sensation from some sort of small object hitting her in the side shooting through her body.
“And stay down if you’ve got any sense.” One of the aliens beside her grunted something at her again, but Dash wasn’t about to give up due to something hitting her and knocking her breath from her lungs.
I’ve had harder crashes than this!
Opening her wings Dash flapped once to get distance between herself and the large giant.
“Your loss.”
Suddenly the weapon in the giant’s claws fired and a whole string of objects struck Dash, the pegasus screaming in agony as she felt one of them hitting her wing and breaking it. Rainbow, now severely injured, tried crawling further but was stopped as the giant stepped on her broken wing to stop her from moving further.
“You’re lucky that you’re worth so much if you’re al-”
BANG
The large Giant suddenly fell over as blood splattered out of his mouth, though to the pegasus’ misfortune the alien fell right on her wing pinning her just as thoroughly as when he had stood on it. Staving off panic, she struggled hard to get the fallen alien off of her wing while a new set of aliens approached her. The leader of this new group wore a set dark grey armor with white highlighted, red lines running down its shoulder pads and arms. His face was marred with strange glowing scars giving him an eerie aura. Unable to get the giant off of her wing, Dash remained completely still and looked at what they would do.
“You okay down there?” the leader asked as he crouched down and pushed the giant off of Dash’s wing, making the pegasus’s jaw drop as he was the first creature who she’d spoken to who knew Equestrian.
“Hey, focus! Are you injured?” the creature stated again as Dash stared up at him in amazement.
Shaking her head Dash pointed at her wing. “Broke that, the rest is probably just bruised.”
“Alright. This’ll sting and burn a bit but will patch up your wing, good as new.” The alien brought a device up to her wing and activated it before Dash could even protest. A needle shot into her wing and injected some sort of fluid that, like promised, burned like Tartarus but quickly faded away again along with the pain.
“Wow, it feels as if it was never broken in the first place!” Dash exclaimed in surprise, though her attention was quickly pulled to the air above her. A whole group of blue boxes flew overhead and started circling the compound, some of them landing and letting out their guards. The noise of vicious fighting came up from between the containers. The sight of the guards reminded Dash of why she was here in the first place. “How is it that I can understand you but no-one else?”
“Let’s just say we have a mutual friend.”
Dash’s heart skipped a beat. “Y-you know where she is?” The pegasus stammered, hopeful that she might have just run into someone who knew Fluttershy by chance.
“Right now I don’t. I’ve been gone for a while. Though I’m pretty sure she’ll be very glad to see you again, Rainbow Dash. Let’s go say hi to Citadel security over there. They’ll be glad to get a method of actually talking with you.”
“So, what do I call you?” Dash asked as she was escorted to the guards.
“Commander Shepard, Alliance na-”
“Sir, I'm going to need you to surrender your weapons,” One of the guards asked something to the commander in a language that Dash, once again, couldn't understand.
“Council Specter. We were just going to take Miss Dash here to Huerta for a check over before reporting to the Council,” the commander replied. “Can we requisition one of your shuttles to get her there?”
“Yes sir. We've already brought another member of its species there,”
“Another one?” Shepard asked, looking down at Dash. “Who's the friend that accompanied you here?”
“The Captain of the Royal Guard, Shining Armour. He’s the brother of one of my best frie-” Dash replied stopped right in her tracks as she noticed the shuttle in front of her. “I-I don’t have to go in there, do I?”
Shepard looked between the craft and the nervous pegasus, immediately making a connection. “You don’t like confined spaces?”
“I-I can handle the small space. Just don’t like it when I let anyone else fly me around,” Dash admitted.
“Well, you can sit in the cockpit and look out of the front if that helps?” Shepard proposed. Dash stayed silent for a moment but slowly walked up to the shuttle and peeked in, seeing the window at the front.
“Alright,” Dash said as she stepped inside, Shepard and the fellow two aliens following her into the craft. Rainbow shuffled up front where a guard was sitting behind the controls of the flying box, gulping as she sat down in the chair next to him.
“So while we fly there, should I tell you how I met Fluttershy?” Dash looked back at Shepard who stood in the door frame as the shuttle’s door closed. It started to rise from the ground, and she gave him a nod. “Well...”
I'm really having trouble getting the motivation to write lately, I promised a breakdown of the choices but I really don't want to write each out to its logical conclusion because that'd take me a lot longer than it has until now.
And yes, I botched the conclusion of the chapter 69 vote. I'm in military school for the airborne, not a professional writer.
1. Go up to them. They can probably help me get back to Shining.
- Rainbow would have been captured, tied up and shipped off of the Citadel before anyone would be able to intervene.
2. Stalk forward to see what they’re exchanging.
- well, you've read the chapter.
3. Leave. I can find the general way back.
- Not giving this option would have people asking why this option wasn't considered
4. [Steal one of the packages and fly off.]
-Dash would have gotten hurt badly but gained the intel on Flutters' and Garrus' situation.
Hope you enjoyed! 
[Paragon] or [Renegade] are colored when available, though normal options might also contribute to one or the other. As for the shippers under us, [Romance] is now also a thing.
When an option is not available due to various reasons it will be colored [Grey]
[No Vote]
Now edited by gerandakis and lordelliot
Remember that comments are like authors' food, we gain energy from them. Constructive criticism is welcome.
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Hello Commander, welcome back.
Well, this was interesting, we are getting Shep much faster than what I was expecting.
About the writing thing, well 99.9% of fanfiction writers are complete amateurs, so the fact that you can accept when you screw up means that you can easily keep up the quality of your work. I really appreciate the effort that you are putting in this fic and I thank you for the hours of entertainment that you are giving me.
“Hey... where’s the phone?”
Some dude: “What phone?”
“THE ONE I
ING CALLED!!!”
Ahhh, it feels so good having my theory proven correct.
9868955
And I second your opinion! This story has been thoroughly enjoyable thus far, and I can’t wait to see more in the near future!
Hmmm, i Always wanted to ask (assuming you are American):
How does it feel to join the military if there is a real chance that you will be send to war as a distraction from impeachment proceedings?
All things considered, decent chapter, if a bit short. I really like knowing the summary of what would have happened with the other choices. It's a good consolation prize when the vote doesn't go my way. Please keep the pace up, now that I've caught up I crave updates each day. I've started playing 3 again and have begun playing the multiplayer for the first time ever.
9869006
Don’t you have anything better to do than to pester this guy?
There is no law that says you have to read this story if you don’t like it. So if it really bothers you that much...
Go find something else to read, and stop being a jerk.
9869006
no I'm not, I'm Dutch.
And why should I assume there's any validity to the impeachment procedures? Even on the other side of the pond we've been beaten to death with Trump this, Trump that and in the end absolutely nothing happened. If he really did something he'd probably be in jail. You guys over there should actually start talking to each other instead of calling the other names.
9869018
Oh sorry, did you imagine hurtful words slung at your idol?
I asked a simple question, you thin skinned drama queen.
9869023
Well, I'm your german neighbour, so no problems with talking to one another on my side.
Deepest apologies for assuming you were american. My mistake.
And let's just say that the situation overseas is not as easy as "if he did something wrong, he'll go to jail".
9869035
Mate, do you think I have any time to follow the news besides school and writing? I just don't give a crap but every time someone says he might even remotely not hate the dude they get publicly crucified and burned at the stake. You're the perfect example, you immediately became hostile to me knowing nothing about my stances.
Sometimes you get writers block. Don't worry, it's happened to all of us.
9869035
Ohhh, I’m shakin’ in my non-existent boots. If ya want to offend me you’re gonna have try a little harder that that.
In all seriousness though, there was really no need for you to be hostile in the first place. Putting up a comment like that is practically begging for some kind of conflict. What with the whole political situation in America going straight to hell as it is.
Hell, it has most of us in America divided right down the middle.
I find it interesting that Shepard went to the Citadel before Omega, considering how well placed Omega is. It's quite clear that most people know that Archangel has some protection, and I'm fairly sure that the Illusive Man would know that it's Fluttershy. It's quite possible he hasn't given Shepard the dossier on Archangel yet because recruiting one would get both of them, and if anyone could convince the commander to turn on Cerberus right at the start, it would be Fluttershy. So pushing recruiting them back until later on would allow for Shepard to get attached to his new crew, make it more likely to keep working with Cerberus.
Hell Yeah!!!!
The Commander is back!!!
Now the question is.......how the reunion will happen?
On a side note: keep up the good work!!!
Shepard is back baby!
9869068
Man, don't look for hostility where there was none.
Sometimes a question is just a question.
9869100
Yeah, politics can be a touchy subject, but you went right on the attack. Please simmer down. Like 9869181 says, sometimes people just have a question with no ulterior motive, so give people the benefit of the doubt and assume their intentions are pure until proven otherwise. However, I would say that asking about politics like that- This isn't the place. For everyone's sake, keep comments on the story in the realm of the story. Personal questions can be asked elsewhere.
9869271
Yeah... okay, I’m sorry guys. I realize that I stirred this whole thing up. I hope that none of you will hold it against me.
9869181
Sorry there, it looked like that message was directed at me since I didn't notice 9869018 but that still holds up my point.
I appreciate that there's differences of opinion but both of you immediately had a hostile undertone in your messages which helps absolutely no-one.
I defer to my editor's comment here 9869271
9869383
Nah mate, don't worry 'bout it.
I would like to point out one thing though...
9838366
I WAS RIGHT!!!
There, I am satisfied now.
So two options - what we read and what we didn't get - would've led to Rainbow learning about Fluttershy. ....next chapter is gonna show her stunned reaction to badass Flutters, isn't it.
9869393
No problem. I see how that could happen.
I still don't see where you find a hostile undertone in my initial post. Unless you blame me for how I answered that first, ahem, juvenile response.
9869430
Heh, so that's what you had spoilered. Nice. That's also how I originally played the game.
Writer burnout, and writer's block is a common element of all excellent writers.
Just shows you're conscientious enough to be concerned about the quality of your writing, rather than just putting words on it page that matches a sentence structure.
If you feel you need to slow down how often you post I think your real fans will be forgiving. I know I am.
Keep up the excellent work, and I hope you are succeeding in your dream of becoming airborne.
Quick question, when exactly did Shepard learn Equestrian? I thought that Shy was just talking through her speech sense all that time. I didn’t realize she had taught them Equestrian.
Also, yay! Another chapter without Armor. Not that I have anything against him, but I just really prefer Pegasi.
9878925
He didn’t. His Omni-tool had plenty of time to interface with the one Flutters had. Most likely Fluttershy’s spoken language was saved in his own Omni-tool for later use. It’s a pretty awesome universal translator!
...wow, I am such a nerd.
9879588
I like it when a reader reasons the exact same way I did when writing a chapter
9879588
Oh. That makes sense, although how would her language have gotten into the omnitool in the first place? If she really was using her speech sense to communicate, I don't really see a reason why she would have had to put her own language into the omnitool. Unless it did it automatically, in which case that seems like it is a possibility for a huge invasion of privacy.
9879858
) with the neural patterns given off by the brain, and probably by extension, spoken thought.
Well, the Omni-tool connects to its user on a neural level. For example, in order for Flutters to bring up the interface, she had to ‘think’ about doing it. The Omni-tool is designed to work in perfect harmony (pun intended
I’d theorize that Omni-tools are also designed to learn, and adapt overtime to outside stimuli. The best example I can come up with is when you’re in the Citadel Archives, trying to stop the clone from ruining your life. When you start coming across the video files you see an interrogation that took place during the First Contact War, where a human soldier is talking with two turians. Humans didn’t have their own tools at the time, so I can only assume that due to extended contact, the tools were piecing together the human language with words from their own.
This isn’t exactly perfect though. Like when you’re talking to Tali for example. Occasionally she would say something like “ke’lla”, or “bosh’tet”, and it probably comes out like this because there aren’t any English words to match them with. Though I’d wager that the fancy-space-tool probably had a better time with translation because Fluttershy could already comprehend what people were saying to her, and vice versa.
Disclaimer: On the off chance that I have bored you to death, I apologize. I was one of those players who read the Codex in the three games for funzies.
9880067
I was also one of those people. I then read the description for every single planet in every game. And then I read the wiki for more lore. And in the first game, I tried to explore every planet I could. And I always took the question dialog, always. And I read the description for every gun in every game, every upgrade in the second one, and read every single datapad, terminal, whatever in every single game. And I do this level of lore hunting in every game I play.
Also, if others can download the neural sync data from your Omni tool, that is a huge invasion of privacy.
Also, if they were designed to learn and adapt, they would be both AI and illegal. Also, I believe the ME universe is one with a galactic common language, plus native or species specific languages.
Also, are you saying that they don't learn the language, it translates it for them acting as an extension of their brain? Because that is one step from neural networking. One very small, step.
9880215
Well I did say it was just a theory I had before I went into the explanation. Though I have to admit that you got me... I wasn’t thinking about it like it was an A.I.
Though I would like to point out from an observational point, that it would be straight up difficult for some aliens to physically speak the human language. Take the turians, and their bird sorta bird shaped mouths. They are mostly narrow, are slightly exposed from the sides, and don’t seem to have teeth that would support our languages either. They’d probably speak in a series of low howls or grunts given how their heads are shaped. So it would make sense for them to have some way of communication with other species, not that I’m saying there aren’t others who can understand them as they are. Hell they Omni- tool was always a thing, but definitely simplifies things.
Though now that I think about it, omni-tools, like all technology, aren’t infallible. If they suddenly stopped working it would definitely be prudent for people, at least those in the management, to have an understanding of how other people speak.
Just spitballing here.
9880310
That’s a good point, actually, about the alien anatomy. I mean, take the Hanar, as an example. They don’t have mouths. Although, now that I think of it, how do they eat? Are they amoebae? Do they ingest via osmosis? Where are their organs? They are completely transparent! I JUST REALIZED THE HANAR MAKE LITERALLY NO SENSE WHATSOEVER! This complicated things. If the developers weren’t thinking of these things, then there is a chance that they made some things impossible to create a theory for...
This is a very sad day for me. Thinking about the science in games is one of my favorite activities.
9880340
Hey, I’m just happy to finally have a like-minded individual that I can debate this stuff with.
9881116
I agree, although that is not the main reason I am posting this. I liked your comment to agree. The reason I am posting this, is to correct what I said about the Hanar. Assuming that they do eat similarly to amoebae, that would eliminate the digestive system problem. Instead of a nervous system or brain, their entire body could be their brain, with just enough natural eezo to provide enough mass reduction for levitation. This would explain their glow when they talk.
Of course, this would also make them the only sapient species in the galaxy with no nervous system, but that is beside the point.
9881245
Then What is the point...? Ya kinda left me hangin’ there. DON’T HOLD ME IN SUSPENSE MAN!
9881401
The point is, that the Hanar make sense again! So I am no longer sad about the ME universe. Although that second point is beside the point...
And so is that third one, now that I think of it.
9881411
At the end of the day, that’s really all that matters... until another question inevitably demands our attention.
I actually thing RD win the Darwin Award. To bad Shepard fixed it.
Normaly a broken wing need to be set, just like a broken arm or leg...
If the Krogon would have mutilated RD wing to teach RD common sence i would have been perfectly fine with it.
Well deserved!
And like that Rainbow-suicide-Dash is back on her suicide run. Hurray...
The only time I dislike Shepard saving the day...