• Member Since 10th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen Jul 24th, 2022


Just an average insane brony, doing average insane things. Professional Fanfiction Writer and Purveyor, relevant links are on my profile page.


When one's genetic template is overwritten, there tend to be... side effects. Most of the side effects come into play immediately.

Sometimes, though, one has to live with a new biochemistry for a while before it triggers.

It's actually very well documented.

Written for FTP13. Cover art by cheezedoodle96.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 181 )

Now, in my head, I'm just imagining the Princesses having the LUMPS during the Grand Galloping Gala :rainbowlaugh:

Twilight Sparkle, eat your heart out.

jjrock7H #3 · Aug 16th, 2016 · · 16 ·

After a moment, Starlight Glimmer shrugged. "Well, if you don't try to eat my heart out, I'll consider it."

that's a fair deal. Twilight can just eat you out instead.


*Cough* Fic rated E, children might read *Cough*

So, is that Discord's problem? He has an overactive immortality gland, causing him to have constant mood swings, leading him into insanity?

And this is why Starlight was not wrong for wanting to create a society with no masters or servants.

Headcanon F:yay:ING accepted.

She goes bat shit no one cares....

Discord is just wacko. So combine that with Nightmare's issue and...... Wow. Makes perfect sense why he could be domesticated is the only word comming to mind for some reason.

So this was the reason I follow you. You somehow made those moodswing jokes work perfectly far longer than one ought to be able to.

I accept this story as my new master and overlord headcanon. All the other stories about angsty immortals can go take a hike.


Not bad. I giggled a little. But then again, I am a little drunk.

Does this happen to Tirek?
What about Chrysalis?
. . . Gummy?


... What if his works in the reverse? That when he goes through LUMPS, it has to be 100% drained and he experiences periods of complete and total rationality and logical thinking as it "recharges"?

7484895 We saw what happens with Gummy goes through it in Slice of Life. It makes him extremely philosophical and contemplate the meaning of his life.

Some people (Like me) do that all the time, so that may be his normal state of mind.

7484895 when gummy needs to release the crazy he gives it physical forms.
Pinkie pie
Cheese sandwich
Your mum
All from gummy.

7484895 This is why villains happen. The villains have their LUMPS cycles fairly synced, that's why there have been so many of them so regularly.

Interesting bit of headcanon there. *nods sagely* :moustache:

7484906 That would be hilarious as a story if only because of how much all the ponies would freak out about him being so calm and rational.

She lowly let it out.


7484895 I assume the Canterlot Invasion was the result of Chrysalis forgetting her purge. Why you would go for a frontal assault with a race of spies is beyond me.

On another note, that cover art killed me.

Maybe Cadence got lucky and had hers during her pregnancy. It would just look like pregnancy hormones. Or maybe everyone else got unlucky and Cadence had hers during her pregnancy. Which highly increased the level or her pregnancy craziness. Poor Shining Armor and the whole Crystal Kingdom!!!!

Well, guess that's one way to deal with immortality. Funny to see Starlight stuck dealing with Twilight in this state, it makes for an interesting combination. Spike is probably used to dealing with Twilight's insanity as is, its funnier to see Starlight having to adapt.

Well, Twi had an unexpected case of the crazies.
She'll certainly start scheduling it from now on.
Celestia's first time for this had to have been pretty hilarious though :rainbowlaugh:

Basically, there's a part of my brain that factors in all the implications of immortality, and keeps them from affecting me too much.

"Alicorns have congenital brain damage that keeps them from thinking about the future too much" actually explains a surprising amount of the events of the show.

After a moment, Starlight Glimmer shrugged. "Well, if you don't try to eat my heart out, I'll consider it."

7484419 Ha Ha, yea... But they won't understand it, And if they do... Well then, they've gone and been blessed by the Internet.

7485137 unexpected? By who? Who wouldn't expect twilight to go crazy at random by now.
thats kind of twilight's thing.

not gonna lie... kinda want a sequal to this

7485181 Unexpected for Twilight herself. I probably wrote my thoughts wrong - what I meant was that it caught her off guard

"I... the leaders of ponykind... regularly go insane."


This was a beautiful thing. Glorious, glorious surreal insanity. :pinkiecrazy:

Sometimes an alicorn just has to take her LUMPS. Preferably not where anypony else can see it.

Have all of my yeses! This was so funny and crazy. Great job.


7485199 "Actually, that explains a lot. All my life I've felt like there's something wrong with this country, as though if anyone ever looked too closely at the way Equestria is run they'd realise it doesn't make sense. Do you know what I mean?"

"Absolutely. Nothing to do with LUMPS, though, life is just like that."

This could be harassed for good you know, next time it happens tell Twilight to create immortality for her friends so she won't be alone...
:pinkiehappy: FOREVER!


New head canon accepted! :twilightsmile:

Foreverrrrrrrrr...! :pinkiecrazy:

Praise the sun

This was a great story! I hope there will be a sequel!

7484375 That would be so funny!

7485428 Well, with the whole 'avatars of friendship' thing tying them to the tree, aren't they all immortal anyway?

7485550 I've actually wondered about that myself really...

7485550 does a certain plastic pony manufacturer have a need for an alicorn mane 6 yet?

"All I have is the temporary illusion of companionship provided by a few short-lived mobile sacks of flesh, only different in the fact they choose to associate with me."

"...wow, that's depressing."

I'm with Starlight that is depressing.

Great fic dude very amusing and definitely got several laughs out of me.:twilightsmile:

"...that's it. I'm done. I'm out." She turned around, ready to leave.

Starlight just said what the majority of Ponyville newcomers say when they hear what happens around the town.

Also, this story was hilarious. :pinkiehappy:

Pretty damn great. That was pretty damn great :pinkiehappy:

7485550my headcanon says no. There conduits, not battery's for the power. If they actually held the power within one of two things might happen. One they become powerful and immortal. The second is they quickly burn up and burn out. And we have only seen them power up just one time outside a dreamscape created by Luna.

wlam #49 · Aug 16th, 2016 · · 1 ·

They're the actual elements of harmony in the same sense that Applejack is an orchard. Using something isn't the same as being something. Never even mind that, you know, at least two other people held them in the past.

"I... the leaders of ponykind... regularly go insane."


Starlight stared at Twilight.

Yeah, I'm with Starlight, this is all a little concerning.

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