Rainbow Dash, best pony, fastest flier in Equestria, all around awesome mare, was called upon to help with the wedding of her friend's big brother. And hey, she never leaves her friends hanging! Of course, when it turned out some kind of bug thing had replaced the bride, Rainbow was more then ready to fight. Heck, even after it seemed all hope was lost, the pegasus refused to give up.
So when she saw Shining Armor charge up a final spell, she smirked.
But when that spell reached her and flung her against the wall, her smirk devolved into shock...
Cover art is a combination of Deception is Magic vector by Helios and Sonic Rainboom Version One by SkyRings.
I'm always in favor of completing the cycle. Looking forward to the story of the world's most awesome erovore.
I got to admit, this is the first "Mane 6 is a changeling" story I've read, but if they are all like this I better make time for a 5 more fics! A little heartwrenching I gotta say. At least Rainbow Dash went out in style. And we will hopefully see more of 802802. I don't know how these fics go, but I'd like to imagine the quirky little scout will follow the adventures of Rainbow Dash.
However, there a few grammar problems that I was making just a few weeks ago! Now I get to help you! The power of learning!
First of all, there are some spelling issues you should go over. Not a lot, but just a few. Like "The filly stared at the proffered hoof." or "ego, supego, id..." Small errors, honestly could be fixed in a flash!
Next is the fact that you don't capitalize after the "..." and example would be "...hush now," It's at the start of the sentence and would probably still need to be capitalized. But perhaps instead of starting the dialogue with three dots you could just fill it in with an action, like a sigh or a anxious fidget. Something that would show 802802 hesitated. Looks a little cleaner. At least to me!
And finally! For the big finale! Dialogue punctuation. I'll give ya the same advice I got that got me out of the grammar rut that I was in.
The most prevalent errors were incorrect use of punctuation when dealing with dialogue. Consider the following four cases:
"That was lovely." answered Twilight. (INCORRECT)
"That was lovely." Answered Twilight. (INCORRECT)
"That was lovely," answered Twilight. (CORRECT)
"That was lovely." The purple unicorn nodded her head politely and left. (CORRECT)
In the first example, a full stop is used in place of a comma, despite the fact that this sentence should flow. In the fourth example, a full stop is used, but the next sentence describes Twilight's actions AFTER speaking. In many cases, I noticed that you were doing the same as the second case, which not only has a full stop but also has a capital letter, probably because your word processor is doing this automatically. This is only necessary in situations like case four.
Also remember to correctly place commas when dealing with names and titles, as shown in the case below:
"I am extremely thankful Twilight." (INCORRECT)
"I am extremely thankful, Twilight." (CORRECT)
Either an editor or a brush-up on grammar (I think there's something on the Equestria Daily FAQ that might help) would be most welcome.
(Written by Ficta_Scriptor)
Fix those errors and I'm sure you got a great story on your hands! I'll be watching this story! And your grammar!
It's funny there's a story with an exact same title
Well written.
2177888 Also, in the main story description, "all hope was nost". Not a bad intro chapter.
I'll be sure to keep reading this as long as -sad- only refers to the story, and not the ending. I simply must have a happy ending.
(Also thanks for linkin' to my story there.)
2177920 yeah that's an aweosome story
Team Green Bean
802802 is already a better character than 90% of OCs... You've earned a fave just on her alone.
2178056
...I am giggling. I am giggling at this comment. You'll be kicking yourself when you realize why.
Dat feels.
HOLY SHIT
Well I'm still going to read it but this is pretty dark.
I mean if there is some magic where the real Rainbow Dash's consciousness goes into the fake one right after she dies, then I'm cool with this. But if not, well still dark since a filly freaken dies. I guess we do get a new one though, it's interesting and conflicting at the same time! You crazy, crazy writer. MOAR!
That was sad...what if that had actually happened?
Now to hope the Mane will be understanding enough once they realise.
Awaiting further releases, dear Author.
2177888 Pretty sure proffered is a word, meaning the same thing as offered.
Hey! I've got a Rainbow changeling! But not as good as yours.Mine is where Rainbow gets kidnapped by Crysalis's daughter.
Love story can't wait for more!!!
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/308/031/880.gif
cdn.crushable.com/files/2012/08/right-in-the-feels.gif
Hate to say it, but not only are there other stories with this name, there's at least one other story that's done the Rainbow-changeling thing.
Forever a Changeling
But don't let that stop you, by any means. You've got a good start, and I'd like to see where it goes.
"One of the girls has been a changeling all along!" is not a new idea. What I have not really seen before is this dynamic that appears to exist (or that will eventually exist) between 802802 and Rainbow Dash. Even if the rest of the story didn't hold my interest, that alone would've sold me on it. You have written something here.
2178081
Not an OC? Maybe she replaces Chrysalis at some point before the wedding. Or is it just the fact that a character with a number for a name is considered in the top 10% of OCs?
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQh3O__czKLG8rIHEfDPwjrY9imHLzYDO8hDM_Fz4GQZgk06q2X
See above image.
2178764
Leet speak. That's all I'm going to say.
2178865
Ah. Sort of an unusual way to use the 2.
2178081
If it turns out to be Bon Bon... I'd be ok with it. //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Queen_Chrysalis.png
If it turns out to be Trixie... Well, she was already in four different places in Ponyville at the same time in the same frame, but somehow I doubt it.
If it turns out to be Ditzy Do... And there goes making the Daring Do books based on actual events.
If it turns out to -you know what? I'm stopping here. There are too many background mares who hang their horseshoes in Ponyville.
2178865
...
I blame being physically unable to recognize "2" as an "n". I mean, 5 as an S, sure, but not 2 as an N. That said, I an only presume that Queen Chrysalis Mind Raping Lyra Heartstrings didn't put her in a good mood.
2178932
Rotation.
This is actually a lot different from most 'X turns out to be a changeling the whole time' stories. So, good on you.
I'll be keeping an eye on it. Excited to see where this one goes.
Right. In. The. Feels.
That was Beautifully written! Well Done, and I can't wait to read more!!
All The Best to You,
Brony and Dashing Proud ,
Lightning Flash
My god that was *Feeling stab through the stomach* oh god. *Coughs up a gallon of blood* MY DEATH HAS COME *Feeling stab mercy stab through the face*
Yay, I needed a new dashling fic seeing as my old one finished a few weeks ago. This will do nicely.
remember when pewdiepie cried at the end of "The walking Dead"?
that's me right now, no lie, i hate you but i love you at the same time.
2177920>>2178055
There is also a third one named like that. And also one without "The" in the title.
Also, I believe that Changeling RD is almost canon. Go to youtube and watch the scene where SA and Cadance blast Changelings. Now take note of Mane 6 before and after the sphere goes through. Notice somepony? Or rather, lack of one?
2182883 oh shit how did I not notice that?
2182883
...wait seriously? THAT HAPPENED? SCREENSHOTS!
2182883 I think they would have noticed if one of them was flown backwards into the wall.
there's one of scootaloo but not luna and sweetie is a robot so no changling for her >:D
Didn't know there was a Changelestia one. But this one is beginning to look nice. Can't wait till Dash finds out she's a changeling. I'm curious how the others will react...
I love Chrysalis trying to smooth things over. Really helps with the whole "Twilight's best friends trust the pony they've just met over her" thing. And now she's stuck trying to figure out what is up with this drone. Probably imagining some sort of super-elaborate scheme that she'll overprepare for...
Or not. But I love that kind of thing. In any case, looking forward to more.
2183540 Two words: Hologram projectors.
Keep it up! I can't wait to see how things turn out.
2183617 yay science!!!
2183172
There were open doors behind them. She didn't have to hit the wall. Not immediately anyway. Also, just look at them. They stare at our magical pair and nopony else!
I mean, it's simply an animation error and all, but it's still funny. There is clearly an intact wall behind those doors, too.
2182947
Compare 1:04 and 1:38
Scootaling and For Mother have changeling Scootaloo, and The Alicorn Delusion has all the princesses as changelings, but I don't know of any where all 3 Cutie Mark Crusaders are changelings, or where Luna is a changeling and Celestia isn't.
Didn't know there was a Celestia Changling.
For the CMC there is Scootaling
I haven't seen any stories involving changling Apple Bloom or Sweetie Belle yet.
A great chapter btw. Likes how Rainbow Dash helped instinctively, a great hint there. And I liked Cadence/Chrysalis' confusion at Rainbow's response to rank.
Seems not even the queen is aware what all her subjects have been doing
2178055
Potato...How we miss thee...
Oh, wow...! I thought this was just going to be a rewrite of the episode, then that scene with Chrysalis...
So completely unserious and unimmersive chapter 1 which by the way ruins any potential mystery and a chapter 2 that's like, 90 percent already been known conversations and actions. Are you going anywhere with this?
I found another dash changeling fix
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/52342/forever-a-changeling
I have read one with Scootaloo: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/51658/scootaling
I also have read another one with a changeling Rainbow Dash: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/52342/forever-a-changeling
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw8457-133588198154.gif
2184077
There are quite a few twi ones