• Published 18th Apr 2012
  • 7,352 Views, 871 Comments

The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody) - TundraStanza



Think about it like Death Battle, only with less death and more hyperactive dialogue. It all started with a fateful encounter between Deadpool and Pinkie Pie. It turned into something bigger.

  • ...
34
 871
 7,352

PreviousChapters Next
The Lesser Light

Advisory: Please set "Formatting" to "Dark" to ensure that colored text is legible. Thank you.

It is not a matter of whether permission or forgiveness is easier. Rather, which is more painful in the long run?
Properties in this chapter belong to Hasbro, Death Battle Channel, and Marvel.
---

The Moment No Pony was Waiting For

(A Death Battle Parody)

~Little sisters, little brothers...~

It's a tale as old as the first people on Earth. When there are two or more siblings, there is often one that's destined for greatness. The rest must deal with the leftovers, or worse. They may face outright disgust at their position.

And they can't help but feel a desire to undermine that great sibling's power with an evil plan.

Nightmare Moon, the darkness-saturated version of Princess Luna, sister of Princess Celestia.

And Loki, the god of lies and brother to Thor Odinson. He's W and I'm B.

And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.

~~~Death Battle~~~

-Species: Alicorn
-Princess Luna overwhelmed by her own dark emotions
-Powers: strength, flight, magic, beams that can cut through stone, shape-shifting, object possession, dark illusions, freely moving the moon, teleporting (allegedly)
-Plan: Shroud the world in eternal night, demanding respect from all the little ponies
-Hubris: laughing maniacally and monologue
-Weakness: Elements of Harmony; concentrated solar magic
-Currently only exists as a memory

In our universe, the sun is the center of our system of planets. Its gravity ensures that we stay in an orbit and a relatively inhabitable atmosphere. But in Equestria, it's a little different. The ruling princesses control the path of the sun and moon, day and night respectively.

You'd think ruling over all the night was awesome, right? I know my parties don't start any earlier than midnight! But I guess the land of magical ponies hadn't quite caught up to that modern idea. The younger princess felt ignored and went into an emo stage out of sheer jealousy.

The anger and jealousy overshadowed Princess Luna, transforming her into a force of night that could not be ignored: Nightmare Moon.

A flash of lightning highlights the maniacal laughter of the dark mare.

In a move of desperation and regret, Princess Celestia used the Elements of Harmony to put Nightmare Moon into a thousand-year time out inside the moon itself. Kind of hard to make Elements do what you really want when there's only one of you. These ponies keep talking about the magic of friendship or whatever. I guess the magic rocks don't accept ponies that are their only friend.

On the last night of the longest day after the thousand years were up, Nightmare Moon returned and attempted to shroud the world in eternal night. I guess no one bothered to explain to her the negative effects on natural habitats and food growth in a world without direct sunlight.

When six ponies journeyed off to find the Elements of Harmony, Nightmare Moon tried a bunch of things to get in their way. She could possess inanimate objects to act on her behalf, create illusions to hold them back, and her shape-shifting body cut through ropes, hair, and flesh.

It's likely that Nightmare Moon possesses all of the powers that Luna has and expanded upon them. Her sheer magic was enough to overpower her older sister who has a similar magic prowess. She can alter her appearance, magically amplify her voice, and summon lightning storms with little effort. Luna is capable of entering dreams and fighting nightmares from inside the sleeper's mind. The Nightmare can also apparently possess a body separately from Luna, keeping the memories and magical strength of its previous host.

Despite these powers, she ended up losing to somebody shooting her with magical Element lasers. Maybe if she stopped monologuing and laughing like crazy, she could have gotten *ess* done.

We all have to start a series somewhere.

"The night. Will last. Forever! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

~~~Death Battle~~~

-Full name: Loki Laufeyson
-Species: Frost Giant "god"
-Adopted by Odin of Asgard
-Powers: astral projections, energy blasts, flight, illusion magic, teleportation, shape-shifting, telepathy
-Alignment: Unstable; has often worked against the heroes, but has also fought alongside the Avengers
-Makes up for lack of Asgardian strength with his sorcery; still resents Thor for overshadowing him
-Weakness: Strong emotional rushes steer his normally logical mind astray

The realm of Asgard is inhabited by beings so powerful that they are revered as gods. The king of this realm was Odin, and he was both a warrior and strategist. After leading his army to wipe out nearly all of the neighboring Frost Giants, he stumbled across what appeared to be an innocent boy. Feeling something of a conscience, he took in Loki as his own son.

But if you remember, Odin had another son called Thor. And this kid was a super child that would eventually help found Marvel's team of heroes called the Avengers. Being in the shadow of greatness, Loki wasn't exactly happy about that. Plus, people kept treating the younger brother like garbage, so it was kind of predictable that he'd be a little passive-aggressive.

Though his strength far surpasses that of earthly men, it paled in comparison to his brother's. So, Loki turned his attention to master his sorcery. These powers include projecting astral copies of himself, blasting foes with energy, flying, casting illusions, shape-shifting into other people, teleporting between locations, and manipulating the minds of others with telepathy.

The god of trickery lived up to his title by constantly messing with Marvel heroes. Such humble tricks included doing impressions of Thor's friends, freezing the life tree, unleashing an army of monsters on Earth and Asgard alike, and faking his own death multiple times.

But while the trickster enjoys playing with the emotions of others, he finds the opposite to be much less enjoyable. If he is hit by an emotion too overwhelming, he could end up throwing his calm, logical plans out the window and leave himself open.

So, he can dish it out, but he can't take it?

Exactly.

“Born to be a king, I ask one thing in return: a front seat to watch Earth burn."

~~~Death Battle~~~

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's settle this debate once and for all.

It's time for a Death Battle!

~~~Death Battle~~~

It is a dark and stormy night. Wait, that sounds too generic. Well, how else can someone describe this setting? The only source of light in this setting is the moon, and that keeps getting interrupted by the moving shadows of trees. Plus, there's lightning going off every now and again. Okay, dark and stormy night it is.

Timber wolves prowl around the forest shadows. The land suddenly shakes, provoking the wooden canines to growl. A giant mass stomps down and crushes one of the wolves. Zoom out a lot, and the audience sees a few creatures that resemble titans with bluish-white skin. Just above these giants' heads, a hover bike's engine rumbles. A man in a rather garish gold and green outfit rides this flying bike with a calm look on his face.

Several meters to one side, a group of armored bat ponies fly onto the scene. At the front, there is a black alicorn in midnight blue armor. Her slit eyes stare in annoyance at this invading army of frost giants.

The hover biker stands up on the seat and chuckles at the sight of flying horses.

Nightmare Moon leans her head back briefly before shooting a beam from her horn. Loki lightly hops out of the way as his bike gets totaled by the blast. He yawns before pointing his staff and firing a beam of his own. Nightmare performs an aileron roll to her right, dodging the enemy's beam. The attack ends up hitting one of the bat ponies, sending it tumbling to the forest floor.

Both combatants repeatedly fire shots of magic. The blasts that don't collide with each other rush in either direction. Each spell slinger dodges with little effort. The dark mare uses a break in the casts to fly forward. Loki pretends to ponder for a second before holding up his free hand.

This free hand triggers some unseen force. It catches Nightmare Moon by the neck and suspends her flight. She gasps, holding her hooves against her neck to try and restart her breath. By turning his clenching hand into a thumbs-down, Loki hurls the alicorn toward the ground. She yells out before lighting up her horn.

The lesser of Odin's sons finds himself surrounded by a midnight blue aura. Before he can utter his confusion, he too is hurled toward the ground. One after the other, the combatants collide with the dirt. In the background, the night guard ponies are skirmishing with the frost giants.

Back with the main fight, Loki pulls his face out of the dirt first. Nightmare Moon gets onto all fours soon after. She slams her hooves against the ground, causing several cracks to appear in the otherwise solid rock. Loki creates a similar yet smaller pattern of cracks with his staff in front of himself. It glows and shines in Nightmare's eyes.

You dare attack me? His voice echoes in her head. I am a god! I will not be bullied by a pit of glue playing sorcerer!

Nightmare growls and her eyes glow white. Her state of matter shifts to violet gas and she rushes into the earth's cracks, spreading them along. Eventually, the cracks reach the impression of the staff. Her gaseous form flows into the staff and slices it into multiple pieces.

"You are kidding, right?" Her voice echoes in the immediate area. "What is a god of tricks compared to the night itself?"

Loki appears to take on the form of Thor and throws his fist at the magical cloud. Part of the cloud solidifies and meets the fist partway with a hoof in the opposite direction. Loki then takes on the shape of a white-haired man with bluish tights. He rapidly kicks at the cloud at its hooves. The shadow cloud retaliates by turning into a Shadow Bolt and flying around the Quicksilver-esque figure with a tornado.

Out of the top of the tornado, Loki flies out with his original face and outfit. Magic appears to dance around both of his hands as he holds them above his head. He looks completely pissed off. Nightmare Moon solidifies while her mane swirls wildly. Lightning strikes Loki's hands and head. He yells out more in surprise than in pain.

Nightmare Moon flies up and shoots a large bluish beam of magic. It goes through the head of the 'god', slicing it into quarters. The rest of the body falls limply to the ground below. After crushing the chest of the body twice with her hoof, Nightmare Moon rushes away to assist her army.

K.O.!

In her shadowy cloud form, Nightmare Moon overshadows one of the frost giants, beats up the other two, and then crushes her host. She emerges in her own body and gives a disappointed look at her soldiers.

~~~Death Battle~~~

What? A Marvel character loses? That's never happened in the history of ever!

Well, hear us out for a bit. This was not a conclusion we drew lightly. Heck, there are a few ways Loki could absolutely take a win against Nightmare Moon. Loki's backstory technically covers a much longer time span than Nightmare's, meaning he could beat her in experience and wisdom. But there's a slight problem with that: the rest of their capabilities are very similar.

Magic that surpasses others of their own kind? Check. Strength that goes above the average person? Check. Illusions? Check. Shape-shifting? Check. Manipulating minds? Teleport? Laser beams? Triple check! Oh, and they've both escaped death in at least one of their comics.

They also share a level of arrogance that can lead to short-sighted mistakes at the worst possible times. Here's where things split hairs. Loki's weakness is his tendency to let emotions overtake him and drive his plans south. In contrast, Nightmare Moon is completely fueled by her own emotions. So the stronger her negativity, the stronger her magic and focus.

But how could Loki ever lose? He tricks people into thinking that he's dead more often than Dr. Doom!

In order for him to keep projecting astral bodies to take the deadly hit for him, a physical body must still be alive for him to copy. Finding that real body may be difficult, but not impossible for someone who can turn into a shadowy cloud and race around. Loki can lead armies, but Nightmare Moon fought all of her battles by herself.

*sigh* In the end, this battle turned into Loki's worst Nightmare.

The winner is Nightmare Moon.

A clip shows Nightmare Moon in the season 5 finale asking, "Who else?"

~~~Death Battle~~~

---

Author's Note:

Alternative ending...
Loki: "Ha! Did you think this was the real me?" *Astral clone disappears and Loki appears behind Nightmare Moon's back.*
Nightmare Moon: "I knew you were going to do that. So I did this!" *Turns into shadow form and rushes behind Loki's back and blasts him.*
Loki: "I knew you were going to do that. So I did this! *Another astral clone and another backstab.*
Nightmare Moon: "I knew you were going to do that. So I did this!" *Creates shadowy clones of herself and attacks Loki from every direction.*
Loki: "I knew you were going to do that. So I did this!" *Astral clone disappears and yada yada.*
Nightmare Moon: "Wha-?!" *Explodes*

(This little fake scene is an adapted version of a property of Viva Riverie.)

PreviousChapters Next