The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody)

by TundraStanza

Magic Must Defeat Magic

A/N: Well, I had been thinking something along the lines of this chapter's match up anyway. Since someone suggested it, I thought I might as well implement the idea.
Properties belong to Hasbro, Screw Attack and Warner Bros.
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The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (14)

---Death Battle---

I call magical duel!

Various magicians, wizards, witches, and sorcerers flash by the screen.

W declares, "Magic, the unusual power of the imagined world. It leaves itself as the answer to many unexplained phenomena."

B announces, "And for this battle, we're taking two of them from the loser's circle."

"Harry Potter the wizard of Hogwarts will face off against Twilight Sparkle of the School for Gifted Unicorns."

"He's W and I'm B."

"And it's our job to analyze their weapons armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle."

---Death Battle---

The title screen parts to reveal a young-faced wizard with glasses and a visible scar on his forehead in the shape of a lightning bolt.

"As we described in his battle with Luke Skywalker," starts W, "Harry Potter is an orphaned wizard who was taken into custody by his aunt and uncle until he was old enough to train under Professor Dumbledore in the ways of magic."

"But for those of you that missed his death by shoto-saber," says B, "let's do a recap." Stats appear as W takes the floor.

"Harry wields an 11 inch Phoenix core Holly wand allowing him to cast most of his spells. He also carries an invisibility cloak and rides Firebolt, a wizard's broomstick capable of reaching speeds of 150 miles per hour in less than 10 seconds."

"His trademark attack is the disarming charm Expellerdactyl."

"Expelliarmus."

"Which knocks an enemy's weapon away or sends the enemy flying."

"The Confundo charm confuses the target, Stupefy stuns them, Rictusempra tickles the opponent, Protego protects against enemy attacks, and Accio summons whatever object he has in mind."

"I still can't get that one to work."

"Harry is also proficient in curses. He can cause pain with Crucio, destroy objects with Reducto, control minds with Imperio, and slash enemies with Sectumsempra."

"Acquired through a book owned by the Half-Blood Prince."

"It is implied that he knows the instant death curse Avada Kedavra, though it can be blocked with just about anything. Also, Harry can teleport with apparition and he's pretty handy with non-verbal spells. His occlumency training helps protect him from mental attacks and illusions."

"And don't forget his young age accomplishments, including all that wasting of Death Eater *ss."

A scene in Professor Lupin's office shows Harry casting, "Expecto Patronum!" for the first time.

---Death Battle---

The picture behind the title card is an image of a familiar lavender unicorn pony sitting and reading.

W begins, "We briefly talked about Twilight Sparkle in her last Death Battle, but there's plenty more to discuss."

B interrupts, "Yeah, this a complicated case. Braniacs usually are, like W here."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't here that," W mutters as a stat screen appears, "Twilight Sparkle was raised in Canterlot by her parents until she began her studies under Princess Celestia in the ways of advanced magic. She has mastered teleportation, object conjuration, levitation, illumination, magic shields, and wind manipulation. It is also worth noting that she can copy spells cast by others after studying them intently the first time she sees them."

"Like when she copied Rarity's gem-finding spell."

"One of Twilight's few offensive capabilities is her magenta magic bolt which can be charged for a long-lasting beam or be fired rapidly in short bursts."

"It's good for destroying rocks and knocking enemies back."

"When she combines the Element of Magic with the other 5 Elements of Harmony, she can free ponies from their darkness or turn chaotic entities to stone. But she cannot do so alone."

"And in one-on-one Death Battles, we don't allow help from friends."

"She's managed to overcome several daunting tasks for pony kind and keeps her life on a relatively scheduled pace."

"Though, for some reason the memory of magic kindergarten still frightens her."

"Even so, she'll never give up the opportunity to learn about friendship."

A scene shows Twilight shouting, "PINKIE!" before she falls onto the ground on her back.

---Death Battle---

W declares, "All right, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all."

B adds, "And to make things more interesting, I've let loose a few monsters from the two worlds."

"What?"

"Death Battle!"

---Death Battle---

The scene changes to a dark-wooded area. Both combatants are walking in from either side of the screen. Twilight currently has her horn lit up while Harry has his wand lit up with Lumos. As with most Death Battles, combatants will have their initial reasoning removed and first attacks will happen without question.

"FIGHT!"

"Rictusempra!" yells Harry. The sort of purple spell hits the unicorn and she falls over laughing.

"Stupefy!" Harry calls out. The transparent bolt hits Twilight and she gets slammed into a tree, no longer laughing. Rather, she grunts in pain. Shaking off her dumbfounded state, she charges her horn and releases a few magenta magic bolts. Harry counters with a quick Protego and a volley of non-verbal spells.

A low howl interrupts their magical duel. The combatants each turn their heads toward where the sound is coming from. It appears the commotion has attracted a pack of wolves made from twigs and lumber. These are the timber wolves. They growl at the sight of two sources of prey. Without warning, they start leaping toward Harry and Twilight.

"Incendio!" yells the boy wizard. The wolf closest to him catches on fire and starts to break apart. The only signs of a corpse are burning timber. Losing interest in the boy who made fire, the rest of the pack starts charging toward the unicorn. She manages to hold them off with a pink magical bubble surrounding herself. Though, it's going to be impossible for her to hold that concentration indefinitely.

A barrage of Incendio spells makes quick work of the remaining wolves. It seems Harry is more interested in removing this new threat rather than his original target. As the last timber wolf burns to ashes, Twilight notices and lets go of her shield. It disappears as she smiles graciously at the guy who just saved her.

Before any touchy moments can take place, a new moaning sound fills the air. Several ghost-like figures glide down through the woods and form frost on the trees that they pass. It seems Dementors have been attracted to the battle as well. As one of them passes Harry, it starts to breathe in emotional essence from him.

The scream of his dying mother fills his ears.

As Harry struggles to maintain his grip on the present, other Dementors start hovering by Twilight. They start breathing and absorbing her positive emotions too, leaving her to relive miserable moments of her life.

"With friends like you, who needs... enemies?"

She's taking it worse than Harry, as her training with mental defense isn't as perfected. Harry, however, manages to stand tall and recalls a happier moment.

He talks with his parents... about everything and nothing. It's more of a fantasy, but he's happy nonetheless.

"Expecto Patronum!" he yells as a curtain of white magic starts deflecting Dementors away from him. He uses his Apparition technique to temporarily leave existence. He reappears beside Twilight. He casts his Patronus charm again. Unfortunately, it seems that there are at least a hundred more Dementors still hungry for soul energy.

Meanwhile, Twilight's silently been observing Harry's use of white magic. With a nod of new determination, she starts concentrating magic of a different variety than her usual blasts. Her thoughts recall a moment of joy.

"What's going on?" asks Rainbow Dash, "Did we stop Discord? What happened to Ponyville?" Twilight and her friends all join together for a group hug assuring Rainbow that they're all okay.

The enemy of my enemy is my friend. At least that seems to be the mutual feeling between wizard and unicorn right now. Armed with a new spell, Twilight joins her force with Harry's.

"Expecto Patronum!" they yell simultaneously. A pale white stag appears in front of Harry and a pale white phoenix appears in front of Twilight. Both luminescent figures then disappear before a rather wide curtain of white magic flashes across the screen blasting away Dementors in a Team Rocket fashion complete with stars twinkling in the distant sky.

Both combatants breathe heavily and collapse from exhaustion. Safe for the moment, they lay down to rest.

"FRIENDSHIP!"

"Friendship? Again?"

---Death Battle---

"Dang," says B, "That was intense magic."

"While Harry was able to catch Twilight off guard with an initiative attack," reflects W, "she wasn't to be taken lightly. She even mastered the Patronus charm on her first attempt. However, their alliance against a double threat by the foreign prevented any chance of there being a victor."

"You're welcome."

"This Death Battle is a draw." A picture of both challengers appears with the bold word "DRAW" underneath.

---Death Battle---

"Next time on Death Battle..." announces B.

Words appear on the screen without a voice source.

...

We hunt for gems.

...

...but now we hunt...

...for you!

...

"Is that an 'any' key? It's an 'any' key. Holy crap."

---Death Battle---

---
A/N: Was there ever any doubt? I don't want to kill either of them. At least not yet.
Properties belong to their respective owners. I gain no profit from this. So long.

Comments

[leaderofstars]

so much friendship. needs more blood to be spilled.

[Cobra 1]

Good one. Diamond dogs? I always think about the sanctuary boss from Earthbound.

[Lag Incarnate]

Ah, I remember having a keyboard with an "any" key. You couldn't press it, but it was funny just the same.

[kurapica]

assets.diylol.com/hfs/b2b/b50/3a5/resized/uncle-meme-generator-magic-must-defeat-magic-931311.jpg

[Wyrme]

3224019 ONE MORE THING! *smacks*

[Wyrme]

515655 They'd go batshit insane.