Two passengers on a train ride toward an uncertain future. One is a pony. The other only pretends to be.

Sex is tame and non-explicit. Don't be afraid to read.

Written expressly for Equestria Daily's Outside Insight Summer Fanfiction Contest.

Now with a dramatic reading by Illya Leonov!

Russian translation courtesy of Arsus.
Chinese translation courtesy of viczhn.
French translation courtesy of BroNie.

Inspired by the artwork of RubleGun and Raddjuret. Musical accompaniment by Patrick Poe.

Featured at Equestria Daily and the Royal Canterlot Library.

Reader Testimonials

"Vinyl + Octavia is one of the fandom's most cliché and mismatched pairs, and yet this is a real romance with genuine depth and emotion." - horizon
"Holy shit this is impressive. Like... Holy shit, man." - Skeeter The Lurker
"You have crafted something wonderful here, a true gem. You should be proud." - Illya Leonov
"Note that I hate this ship when I say this is far and away the best ScratchTavia I've ever read." - PresentPerfect
"Fuuuuck it's so good!" - Luminary

The Long Patrol is an extension of the crown. It brings the rule of law and the princess's banner to the far reaches of the kingdom, the places where harmony fades and the wild chaos of nature still reigns.

In times past, all the tribes took part in the patrol. Today, it is mostly pegasi and a few gryphons. The distances they travel are simply too vast for anyone without wings.

Like most gryphons who join, I wanted to get away from my kind. I dreamed of the adventures I would have and the friends I would make. I certainly got those.

I just wish the price weren't so high.

[My entry for the EqD Summer "Outsider Insight" contest.]

Life's hard when you're small, especially if you're a breezie. The ponies keep trying to knock down your tree-home, steal all your fruit, and now they're about to bring back winter and doom your hive to a frozen fate.

Misty has had enough. She's going to leave her tree, stop the Summer Shutdown, and save the world.

After all, someone's got to do it.

Written for Equestria Daily's Outside Insight Summer Fanfic Contest

This story is a sequel to Misadventures in Manehattan

Ponyville is a dusty little town that wasn't very well-known. Gradually, it's gotten more popular over the years, because some great ponies have left and risen to the top. Grace Manewitz and Coco Pommel are not those sort of ponies, yet.

And if they keep ditching work like this, they certainly won't be going anywhere...

Temporary cover art edited by moi.

There are many duties and obligations a Princess of Equestria must carry out and Twilight is in the midst of learning them. Over the past few days Princess Celestia has been tutoring Twilight in a series of strange, seemingly nonsensical rituals and incantations. Could this all be as vital to the survival of Equestria as Celestia insists, or has Twilight simply found herself caught in an elaborate prank courtesy of the wily white alicorn?

Love Tap experiences another morning of the joys of parenthood with her son Button Mash.

The Everfree forest is just like any other forest—except it's full of monsters and weird magic junk, but ignoring that—it sometimes grows out of control and needs to be trimmed a bit. In order to keep the forest from growing too large, Celestia asks Twilight to start a controlled forest fire to burn a portion of it down. It seems like a simple request, but a series of mishaps and misunderstandings lead to some miscommunication and, subsequently, to Twilight setting fire to all of Equestria.

"Dear Princess Celestia, as your (former) most faithful student, I feel I have to warn you that this is probably a trap. Chrysalis cannot possibly be serious about this. Why would anyone, much less her, want to shoot a documentary on us?"

Chrysalis, queen of all the changeling hives and infinitely cunning architect of their plans to conquer Equestria, has a problem: She knows diddly-squat about ponies. But Chrysalis is cleverer than most—or all—changelings, and she's already devised a brilliant solution to this trifling issue: Make a movie about them.

Tenth place winner in Equestria Daily's Outside Insight contest.

This story is a sequel to Odrsjot

Rainbow Dash and the Noble Jury fly east.

A changeling gets a very risky and clever idea.
Pretending to be an advanced magic doll left as an anonymous gift in front of Twilight Sparkle's home.
It's so audaciously stupid there is no way it's not going to work.