"Back in Gray Smoke, I told you that I had no memories," Ebon Mane said as he trotted a tiny circle inside the confined cabin. "I told you that the only thing I remembered was my mother... and the desire to find my mother." He clenched his jaw tight as his hooves shuffled to a stop. "...but that was a lie."
Silence.
Eagle gazed thinly across the dim interior. "What? That... that you were searching for your mother? I mean, who else are you writing to—?"
"Not that. That part is true. What I'm trying to tell you is that I was lying to you because I... I-I was leaving something out." With a gulp, Ebon swiveled around and slowly sat on the edge of the bottom cot. "Something else that I actually remembered... and still do."
Eagle Eye nodded slowly. "Please, Ebon. Do go on."
The stallion avoided Eagle's gaze, staring instead at the metal floor. His ears folded over his head like a guilty foal. "Whatever happened to me... it took away everything I know about where I was born... what I did for a living... where I came from..." He glanced lethargically at his haunches. "How or why I got this stupid cutie mark..."
Eagle Eye patiently listened.
Ebon went on, "But... th-there is one thing I do remember. My first memory, and it's much... much clearer than anything else in my head. I don't even remember my mother's face like I remember this." He gazed up with a quivering lip. His voice cracked, "I remember the pony who found me."
Eagle leaned his head to the side. "The pony who... f-found you?"
"He... h-he was a trader." Ebon gulped. "Or a merchant. He owned a skiff that he used to travel up and down the rivers of eastern Ledomare. While he operated out of a town not that far from most Confederate settlements, his main place of operations was in Gray Smoke. And that's where I was when I first saw him... and his eyes... his warm... comforting eyes..." Ebon's face winced as his pupils shrank suddenly.
Eagle blinked at that.
With a raspy sigh, Ebon continued. "I was so... so confused... and weak." He swallowed. "I felt like an infant. So helpless and frightened... but too frail to sob in fright. But it didn't matter. He was there to protect me... to nurse me back to health. I couldn't understand why or how... but I trusted this stallion. Who else or what else could I trust? I had nothing, Eagle. Nothing. It was like coming out of a thick storm, but he was there to drag me to dry land. I trusted him. I felt blessed to have been found by him."
With a gentle smile, Eagle said, "Sounds like he was a good pony."
"I believe so." Ebon nodded. "Whole heartedly. There is no doubt in my mind." He cleared his throat. "As... uhm... as time wore on, I started feeling healthier and healthier. I couldn't figure out why. The stallion brought me food, but I don't remember ever eating any. It just... d-didn't feel important to me at the time. As each day went by, all I wanted to do was see his face, his smile, his warm, warm eyes. Somehow... that was enough. Eventually, I got healthy enough that I could look around and collect my bearings. He told me all about how he had found me on some river's edge while he was trading between Ledomaritan towns. As soon as he realized how sick I was, he took the first zeppelin transport up to Gray Smoke so he could nurse me back to health with the comforts of his own home. I... I-I just couldn't believe the generosity of such a pony! And such selflessness too! I told him that I couldn't remember anything—much less how I ended up alone and weak on some riverbed. But... but none of that mattered. It was as though his entire aim in life was to make sure I recovered from whatever happened to me."
"Not all Ledomaritans are heartless creatures, Ebon," Eagle said with a hopeful smile. "Most of them are capable of kindness and gentleness. I mean, look at Belle and Pilate!"
"Eagle, you have to understand." Ebon gulped. "This was different."
"In what way?"
Ebon hesitated.
Eagle winced. "Blessed Spark. He didn't... h-he didn't take advantage of you, did he?"
Ebon's nostrils flared. "No." The breath of anger dissipated as soon as it formed, and the stallion instantly winced. "It... it w-was the other way around..."
Eagle stared quizzically.
With a murmur, Ebon continued. "At first, I was incredibly frightened at how little I knew about myself. My life was a complete and utter blank slate. I was even more afraid of the reason for all of this. But... as it turned out, it didn't matter. This stallion—my caretaker—filled the hours by talking to me. He... he talked about his trade routes and how to properly haggle with soot-stained customers and his various brothers and sisters who had been swept up in the war. He was like a living fountain of words and stories and anecdotes. And you know what? I didn't care one bit! I... I loved listening to him... watching him as he sat across from my cot... seeing the little twitches in his ears when he came upon an exciting story or a harrowing tale that he had to share. I..." Ebon's face locked into a cold position.
Eagle waited for it.
"I... I-I loved him, EE," Ebon said. "I trusted him. I depended on him. I enjoyed him. But... but I loved him. Deep down inside... it was the only thing about me that was real. But that wasn't all." He gulped. "He loved me. I don't say that facetiously, for it was true. I knew it was true. I could feel it. He had the deepest... warmest... most sincere love that anypony could have for another. And he chose to bestow it on me... a literal nopony. And it's not like I could give him anything in return! I mean... yes... I listened to his stories. I gave him company and smiles and... all of m-my attention. But..." Ebon gritted his teeth. "It wasn't worth it in the end. He shouldn't have taken me in. He sh-shouldn't have!" A tear ran down Ebon's face.
Sitting down on his haunches across from Ebon, Eagle gathered the courage to ask, "What happened...?"
Ebon sniffed. "I..." He rubbed his cheek, avoiding Eagle's gaze. "I st-started to notice a change as soon as I was strong enough to walk. Suddenly, my caretaker was having to sit down a lot. It's... it's like he couldn't trot straight. I figured at first that he was exhausted. I mean, he didn't sleep much when he was around me. He was... was so dedicated to making sure I felt better. Well, now I was having my strength return... but wh-why was he losing his balance?"
Ebon paused to shudder.
"And it only got worse, EE," he said. "Suddenly, he would collapse without warning. He'd have these fainting spells. Then, as my vision got better, I could see... I-I could see..." A squeaking sob. "Just how thin and diseased he was." He held a hoof over his muzzle as he stammered. "All this t-time that he was taking care of me... h-he was only dying himself!" Eagle choked. "I... I-I tried to get help! I ran out of his shop and begged for help from these strangers all around me that I'd never seen before! Nopony would lend a hoof. I had n-no idea that we were in the Rust District! It never occurred to me that every neighbor would be cold and heartless scumbags! Unlike him! And his gentle laugh and his warm eyes..." He gnashed his teeth and shook his head. "But they weren't warm anymore! The life had left him! Sucked out as if with a funnel!"
Eagle's lips pursed as he watched with quivering eyes. By this time, Ebon was grasping his head, bending over and shuddering from head to tail.
"I... I-I didn't know what else to d-do! The only thing that seemed to make him feel better was when I was around. So... so I stayed by his side. I even held him close, trying to g-get him to tell the stories that he used to, as if it would m-make him feel better as it did me. But... it didn't." He whimpered. "He only got worse! It... it was like we were the opposites now of who and what we were when everything began! There he lay in the same cot I occupied for goddess-knows how long, and no amount of food or water I brought him could nurse him back to health. I... I-I was helpless, EE! I was helpless to heal the caretaker who saved me from certain death!"
Eagle shook his head. "If he truly loved you, Eagle Eye, I'm sure he would have done something to help the situation. He wouldn't have left so much in your hooves! I'm sure of it!" Eagle gestured. "He'd have told you how to find a physician or where to get medicine or—"
"He didn't want any of that, Eagle!" Ebon practically shouted. He looked up with flaring, wet eyes. "Don't you get it?! He wanted nothing! Nothing but... but m-my company..." The stallion's face paled. Tears streamed down to his quivering jaw. "I... I killed him, EE."
Eagle's muzzle contorted. "...what?"
"I did. I killed him," Ebon murmured. "It took me a long time to realize it. But the same thing that got him to salvage my body in the first place is what sapped him of all energy. He loved me... and I loved him..." Ebon's jaw clamped tightly. "And... because of that... he died. Because of me."
Eagle shook his head. "You... you c-can't possibly blame yourself for that! That's absurd!"
"Isn't it?" Ebon's nostrils flared. "Even as his life faded away, I could feel my health reaching its peak. I don't know what it is... but there's something horrible inside of me. A demon. A curse. A magical disease. Something horrible... and it claimed him as his victim. It... it killed the one pony I truly loved..." Ebon shuddered. "And... and as soon as I f-figured out what was happening, I tried to tell him. But... but he was too far g-gone. His cheekbones were hollow and his m-mane... oh goddess... his mane was falling out at the roots. I sobbed like an infant, and with his last breath he silenced me. He had a smile on his withered face and... and..." Ebon nearly hyperventilated. "Do you know want to know what he said, Eagle?"
Eagle simply stared in stunned silence.
Ebon grunted, "He said 'thank you.'" He clenched his eyes shut. "He... th-thanked me for ending h-his life!" A sniffling, and he clamped his hooves over face. "Mrrmmmf... all he knew was the love th-that had enraptured him... not knowing that it killed him as well! What ever happened to his anger and his fear and his s-sadness? Were they sucked away t-too?! That's not a natural way to die! It's not a right way to die!"
The stallion's quiet sobs echoed between the two.
Eagle exhaled with a shudder, his eyes falling to the floor. Ultimately, he gulped and asked, "What h-happened next?"
"Next?" Ebon sniffed and gazed into the corner of the room. "It... w-wasn't long after that the soot-stained weasels who lived next door caught wind of his passing. They didn't know much about what had happened—only that their neighbor was taking care of an invalid... and getting sick himself. Before I could even grieve his passing, they tore into the shop and ransacked the place. I-I tried to fight them off... b-but they were just too many. I..." He grimaced. "I-I couldn't even recover his b-body to bury him, those damned butchers..."
"Ebon..."
He went on. "Suddenly, I was alone in the streets of Gray Smoke. I didn't know what to do with myself. I was afraid to do anything!" He shuddered. "If I got close to another pony... if I fell into the comforting arms of another equine like his..." He looked up. "What more could I do? Haven't I caused enough damage as it was?"
"Let me guess..." Eagle took a deep breath. "You discovered a way to blend in."
Ebon nodded. "I needed to find some method of keeping myself alive. After my caretaker's death, I felt myself growing weak once again. I... I-I thought if I just scrounged up some food, then I might be able to sustain myself. So..." He shifted where he sat. "I-I snuck into the back of a restaurant in the Bronze District, thinking I m-might be able to steal some bread or something. But... I-I was caught in the act. I had to think fast to save myself, so I told them that I was a backup cook sent from the next district over. To my surprise, they bought it. I had to somehow make some convincingly good meals to save my flank. It... w-wasn't easy, but I discovered I was a fast learner. I'm sure my cooking was pretty shoddy when I began, but somehow it didn't matter. Almost everypony who ate my food felt intensely satisfied—more than the other cooks'. Well, if it works, why spit on it... r-right? I moved my way up, advertising my 'cooking skills' from one restaurant to another, and eventually I was able to sustain myself. But... b-but only through serving food."
Eagle leaned his head to the side. "How do you mean?"
"Well, EE..." Ebon glanced up. "Have you ever seen me eat? Ever?"
Eagle's teeth held his tongue in place for a good few seconds. At last, he murmured, "A good chef never indulges—or so I've always figured."
"Eagle Eye..." Ebon slowly, slowly shook his head. "I don't eat."
Eagle was silent.
"Like... ever." Ebon winced. "It's because... for some reason... it's like I don't have to. It's... it's just fulfilling enough to make other ponies happy with the things I serve them. I can get by on that. And, you know what? That's perfectly fine. That's the way it's always been, and that's the way I aim to keep it. Because I haven't brought harm to another pony. Not even Props! Not until..." He stopped in mid-speech, wincing as if a knife was stabbing him in the gut.
Eagle gulped and leaned forward. "Ebon, I know what you're probably thinking. Or, that is, what you're afraid of, but... please... you have to realize—"
"Do you want to know what his name was?" Ebon asked.
Eagle blinked. "Huh?"
"My caretaker." Ebon gulped, his face frowning. "His name."
Eagle simply stared at him.
Ebon sneered, "His name was Ebon... Ebon mane." A tear ran down the stallion's face, though his frown remained resolute. "I took it, EE. I robbed it from him just as I robbed him of his life." He gulped. "It was the f-first thing I thought of wh-when I was nearly caught stealing food from a kitchen. I didn't have an identity of my own. So I took his... because I loved him... or so I th-thought..."
"Thought?"
Ebon's countenance had collapsed, and he was on the virge of sobbing once again. "My love is a poison, Eagle. It sapped all that was good from Ebon. It took the gift that he gave me and turned it inside out... turned it to arsenic. If I knew what was good for everypony around me, I-I would have just thrown myself off of Gray Smoke when I realized what had happened! But I didn't!"
"Ebon..."
"Stop calling me that!!" he shrieked hysterically, then broke down crying. "I'm a c-coward!"
"You're a strong pony! And you've lasted this long through tenacity and wit!" Eagle shook his head with a hopeful smile. "That's not cowardice!"
"But it is, Eagle! Just because I managed to brush past Props and so many other ponies without hurting them doesn't matter! Because I made myself a promise long, long ago! A pr-promise that I feel myself breaking... or about to break! And as much as I want to do otherwise, I-I can't... I can't break that promise!" Ebon panted and panted, his legs going weak beneath him. "I... I don't want... d-don't want..."
"Please..." Eagle drifted forward and placed his hooves on the stallion's shoulders. "Look at me..."
"Nnnngh..." Ebon clenched his moist eyes shut. He sobbed out the side of his muzzle, a whimpering foalish voice: "I-I don't want to h-hurt you! But that's all that's going to happen, Eagle! I swear it!"
"It's not going to happen to me, Ebon."
"Yes it will!" Ebon hid his face in his hooves. "Nnnngh... don't say it, EE. Please, d-don't say it!"
"Ebon..." Eagle yanked the stallion's arms down. "I love you because I choose to. Because you make my life happier when I'm around you..."
"You... y-you can't..." Ebon shook his head, his eyes full of fright. "We c-can't—"
"And what's more, I made a promise, Ebon!" Eagle said. "I promised that I would take care of you! I would bring you home, even if neither of us know what your home is yet!"
Ebon gulped hard. His ragged breaths steadied into a slow shudder. "You can't possibly know that..." He shook his head rapidly. "Nopony can know that!"
"It doesn't matter," Eagle said. "Ebon, I'm so... so sorry for what's happened to you, but you have to stop running! You deserve a healthy, happy life!"
"EE, I have a healthy and happy life! I have the Jury—"
"And you deserve the best that this life has to give you," Eagle said, slowly forming a warm smile. "You don't deserve to feel cold and lonely everynight. What's more... you don't deserve to feel guilty."
Ebon sucked his breath in on that. His gaze locked with Eagle's.
"You don't, Ebon," Eagle said, squeezing the stallion's shoulders. "What happened was not your fault! Do you understand me? None of this is your fault."
Ebon shook and shook. His eyes once again filled with tears. "Eagle... Eagle, I... I..."
Eagle smiled tearfully. He pulled the stallion in for the deepest of hugs.
Ebon hung his neck over the ex-mercenary's shoulder. He whimpered quietly, his body limp in Eagle's embrace. "I'm so sc-scared. I don't want to hurt you... I d-don't ever want to hurt anypony ever again..."
"Shhhh... it's okay," Eagle said, nuzzling the stallion's ear. "You don't have to say it. But it's okay. We can make it work out."
"But h-how, Eagle? How? You have n-no idea what you're getting yourself into!"
Eagle briefly bit his lip. With a deep breath he said, "You're going to have to trust me, Ebon. We will find a way. You have friends. You have a place to stay. And you have love. My love, and that has never... ever been something I give just freely."
Ebon squeaked an indecipherable word or two past Eagle's ears as he clung to him. After sniffling he said, "Are... are you m-mad at me? Are you disappointed at me f-for not telling you?"
Eagle opened his mouth to respond, hesitated, then said. "What do you think?"
Ebon gulped, then stammered, "You are mad... j-just a little..."
Eagle smiled. "But I love you more than for that to be an issue. Is that so hard to believe?"
Ebon sniffled, then formed a weak smile across his face. "No... it isn't..."
Eagle nuzzled him closely. His voice was warm, though his gaze was distant as he said, "We're going to make this work, Ebon. Someway, somehow, you won't have to be alone or distant anymore. And... and n-neither will I."
Ebon shuddered. "Th-thank you, EE. I... I-I'm so sorry for abandoning you the other day... for leaving you alone and confused..."
Eagle took a deep breath. "One st-step at a time... you feel me?"
"Yes... I-I feel you..." A nervous giggle, then a quiet sob.
The two remained seated together in each other's embrace, until their mutual exhaustion carried them into a mellow slumber.