Top Favourites

Contraptionology! When life gives you lemons, make robot monsters. by Skywriter 134,483 words · 1,026 · 27
Nine Days Down Celestia's latest game of Save the Princess gets more serious than she'd have liked when she gets herself thrown into Tartarus. It would be bad enough if she were alone...but it seems she'd picked up a straggler as well. by JoeShogun 143,510 words · 397 · 11
Who We Are A chilling letter from Celestia throws the girls' world upsidedown by kits 17,196 words · 1,797 · 35
Siren Song Bioshock meets MLP in this psychological thriller, where Celestia's new faithful student, Siren Song, must discover the truth behind the city beneath the waves. Arriving in pursuit of Twilight, Siren finds herself trapped in a city of horrors. by GaPJaxie 186,864 words · 656 · 19

More Top Favourites

When the Levee Breaks Daring Do returns home one final time. by Cynewulf 6,581 words · 236 · 7
Hard Reset Twilight gives her life to stop a changeling invasion. Repeatedly. by Eakin 36,358 words · 7,483 · 121
Through the Well of Pirene [Now EQD Featured!] A young girl must travel to Equestria to rescue her kid sister from the clutches of a terrible magician. by Ether Echoes 358,069 words · 1,441 · 88
Within and Without Luna takes the Elements of Harmony on a journey in more ways than one. by Cloudy Skies 154,174 words · 1,322 · 25
413 Mulberry Lane : A Report (With Annotations by Twilight Sparkle) A student at Celestia's school encounters an entity that seeks to claim him. His only hope lies with Princess Celestia, and the truth hidden in the documents she holds. by Starsong 9,377 words · 382 · 7

TThe Starlight & Pals Magical Half Hour
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
Anthology
Join Starlight Glimmer, Spike, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and all the rest for this fun-filled magical adventure! With this week's special guest, Applejack!
Starlight Glimmer
Cold in Gardez · 33k words · 281 13 · 2k views
EI'm Afraid of Changeling (and other short stories)
MLP: FiM
Anthology
Short sketches about being human. Except, you know, with ponies.
Spike
OC
Other
Main 6
CMCs
Cold in Gardez · 54k words · 705 16 · 6.5k views
ETrade War
MLP: FiM
Comedy
The ponies drive a hard bargain. But Earth must have what they possess, or all is lost. We must have ear scritches.
Human
Cold in Gardez · 2.2k words · 420 15 · 2.7k views
EReflection
MLP: FiM
Mystery
Slice of Life
You can try to forget using dark magic. But dark magic never forgets you.
Twilight
Rarity
Luna
Cold in Gardez · 3k words · 173 3 · 1.1k views
EHow We Burn
MLP: FiM
Slice of Life
Thriller
Twilight Sparkle has never tried to destroy a book before. But she's never met a book like this.
Twilight
Celestia
Luna
Cadance
Starlight Glimmer
Cold in Gardez · 1.5k words · 383 4 · 2.3k views
TThe World is Filled with Monsters
MLP: FiM
Romance
Adventure
Vermilion didn’t join the Guard to be a hero – he just wanted to escape his old, boring life. But when everything goes wrong at a small town called Hollow Shades, Vermilion finds himself fighting for his life, and all of Equestria as well.
Celestia
Luna
Other
Cold in Gardez · 159k words · 440 13 · 3.8k views
TThe Archetypist
MLP: FiM
Drama
I knew there would be trouble when Discord started asking about dreams. He just wanted to make them better, he said. More interesting. In a way he was right – in a very terrible way that we must stop, before it is too late.
Twilight
Discord
Main 6
Starlight Glimmer
Cold in Gardez · 52k words · 430 47 · 2.6k views
TThe Adventuring Type
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
Rainbow Dash gets bored waiting for monster attacks in Ponyville and decides to find some adventures of her own.
Rainbow Dash
Cold in Gardez · 60k words · 257 6 · 2.3k views
TThe Book of Might Have Beens
MLP: FiM
Slice of Life
The book was Twilight Sparkle's greatest creation – ask it any question about how your life might have been and see the answer. It is a work of genius. It is a tempting, insightful, wonderful marvel of magic. It is a terrible mistake.
Twilight
Starlight Glimmer
Sunburst
Double Diamond
Cold in Gardez · 8.4k words · 787 9 · 6.3k views
TTwilight Sparkle at the Gate of Heavenly Peace
MLP: FiM
Adventure
Mystery
Thriller
On the one-year anniversary of King Sombra's destruction, Twilight Sparkle prepares to visit the Crystal Empire again. Thousands will greet her. Four want to kill her.
Sex
Violence
Death
Twilight
OC
Crystal Ponies
Cold in Gardez · 11k words · 284 5 · 2.9k views
TSevere Weather Appreciation Week
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
Sunny days, gentle breezes and light evening showers. The weather in Ponyville is perfect, thanks to the hard work of the weather team. Everypony loves it. Except, it turns out, the weather team itself. A story about passion and pegasi.
Twilight
Rainbow Dash
Thunderlane
Flitter and Cloudchaser
Cold in Gardez · 9.3k words · 622 22 · 4.3k views
TThe Shadow Alphabet, and other tales for Nightmare Night
MLP: FiM
Dark
Horror
A note written in an unknown language. An escaped Nightmare bearing gifts. A young colt afraid of the dark. A pegasus in search of a predator. A collection of short stories celebrating Nightmare Night.
Main 6
Cold in Gardez · 5.6k words · 225 1 · 2.6k views
TThe Color of the Stars
MLP: FiM
Adventure
Drama
Mystery
Starlight Glimmer and Twilight Sparkle follow a mysterious dream message in a quest to prevent their world from being undone.
Twilight
Chrysalis
Starlight Glimmer
Cold in Gardez · 9.1k words · 394 9 · 3.2k views
TThe Lamia
MLP: FiM
Comedy
Slice of Life
There aren't many stallions in Ponyville. For most mares, this might be considered a problem. For a mare addicted to eating them, it's the perfect chance to detox.
Sex
Twilight
Rarity
Spike
OC
Cold in Gardez · 8.3k words · 814 37 · 7.4k views
EChildhood's End
MLP: FiM
Mystery
Slice of Life
A young colt gets his cutie mark in a dream. If only he could remember what it was about.
Twilight
OC
CMCs
Cold in Gardez · 7.8k words · 259 9 · 2.8k views

Now in Book Form!

We have transcended the digital!

To celebrate the final season of Friendship is Magic, our good friend and all-around awesome dude Aquaman decided last year to embark on an incredible going-away project for Bronycon 2019 -- the Bronycon Bookstore. He invited authors from across the fandom to print real, hard-copy books and offer them for sale. At the time, none of us knew if the store would be a success, or if we'd all be walking home with our bags filled with unsold books.

The result surprised us all.

My contribution to the store, Completely Safe Stories: A Collection, sold out in the first few hours of the first day. I wasn't even able to get one for myself. But now, everyone can!

That's right! Through the printing company, Lulu.com, you can have your own copy of Completely Safe Stories for the at-cost price of $10.49, plus $3.99 for shipping. I'm not making a cent off these books.

If you've always wanted a piece of the fandom to hold in your hands, I think you could do worse than this book. The few copies I saw at Bronycon were slick as hell, as quality as anything you'd see at a Barnes & Noble. The cover art came out absolutely great. And the words inside aren't too bad either.

Order your copy of Completely Safe Stories here!

The pretty good ones

The Book of Might Have Beens The book was Twilight Sparkle's greatest creation – ask it any question about how your life might have been and see the answer. It is a work of genius. It is a tempting, insightful, wonderful marvel of magic. It is a terrible mistake. by Cold in Gardez 8,359 words · 787 · 9
All the Mortal Remains Twilight Sparkle discovers an urn, and a decade's worth of questions, in the ashes of her library. by Cold in Gardez 9,035 words · 1,885 · 23
The Destruction of the Self Buckwheat would like to be a farmer. But what he wants isn't important, and that's alright with him. by Cold in Gardez 6,147 words · 545 · 11
Completely Safe in the Reference Section Twilight Sparkle and her friends recover an ancient book of black magic. She does the obvious thing with it. by Cold in Gardez 8,098 words · 1,158 · 17

Stories of mine that have won various contests, Writeoff events, and the like.

Dramas and the like

A Once and Future Darkness When Luna returned after a thousand years of exile, she brought something else back with her. Dreams – real dreams – are shaking the world, and Twilight Sparkle must stop them before they destroy it. by Cold in Gardez 9,555 words · 502 · 37
The Last Trumpet's Call A gryphon survives a battle in the north. His friend does not. He wonders, sometimes, who really won. by Cold in Gardez 14,587 words · 413 · 3
The Carnivore's Prayer It is their nature by Cold in Gardez 9,679 words · 738 · 12
The Glass Blower A young artist in love will do whatever it takes to satisfy his heart. by Cold in Gardez 10,489 words · 1,121 · 24
Small-town Charm Twilight has seen some odd things in Ponyville. by Cold in Gardez 3,958 words · 1,115 · 34

Some of the more serious stories I've written.

Adventures! Others!

The Wind Thief A Tale of the Dragonborn by Cold in Gardez 72,221 words · 903 · 19
The First Light of Dawn A terrible accident threatens to unmake the world as we know it. by Cold in Gardez 67,434 words · 364 · 6
The Riddle of the Sphinx Daring Do encounters a legendary monster, and a terrible test, deep beneath the earth. by Cold in Gardez 4,203 words · 748 · 8
I'm Afraid of Changeling (and other short stories) Short sketches about being human. Except, you know, with ponies. by Cold in Gardez 53,952 words · 705 · 16
Lost Cities North of Canterlot, in the far marches of the Equestrian lands near the Griffon tribes, there is a mountain that flies. by Cold in Gardez 11,045 words · 1,075 · 16

And that leaves my two long-form stories, both adventures. For those of you who ever wondered where the Skyrim crossovers are, The Wind Thief is hopefully your answer. The Riddle of the Sphinx is about the best pegasus, while The First Light of Dawn was my first attempt at a true epic. Shorts is just what it says on the can – a collection of short stories, all written in 30 minutes or so. Lost Cities is an exercise in telling stories without characters or actions.

The Comedies

Naked Singularity Twilight attempts to write a sensual romance novel. by Cold in Gardez 10,524 words · 3,052 · 55
The Contest Fluttershy returns to defend her title as Quiet Game world champion. by Cold in Gardez 6,714 words · 1,914 · 24
The Lamia There aren't many stallions in Ponyville. For most mares, this might be considered a problem. For a mare addicted to eating them, it's the perfect chance to detox. by Cold in Gardez 8,321 words · 814 · 37
National Geographic Presents: Big Princess Week Twilight Sparkle notices some odd urges, now that she's suddenly become an alicorn. by Cold in Gardez 5,406 words · 1,235 · 42
The Time of Their Lives Twilight Sparkle is arrested for the second time in her life. Rarity is attempting to put her business partner out of business. The undead have risen and walk Ponyville's streets. A normal day, in other words. by Cold in Gardez 6,988 words · 905 · 26

For some reason, I'm known as a comedy writer. Here are the ones that still make me laugh.

Nov

28th

2019

Tastes like Turkey · 4:45am November 28th

In which Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer are 30s noir detectives.

Report Cold in Gardez · 322 views · Story: The Starlight & Pals Magical Half Hour · #Thanksgiving #shmaltz #shmarm #marmite #Starlight Glimmer is best pony

Comments ( 212 )

Viewing 208 - 212 of 212

Comment posted by Velvet Dawn deleted August 14th

pterrorgrine

pterrorgrine #211 · July 21st · · ·

2766163
Cool! Didn't realize you had another alias; no wonder I didn't see it on Derpibooru either. I also never realized you did the cover to Pagliacci, but now that I see it with your other stuff it's obvious! (I did already know Skywriter's real name, so when I saw his comments replying to someone asking if you'd showed a piece to yourself I was able to fully appreciate many of the levels of irony.)

Cold in Gardez