• Member Since 28th Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen 14 minutes ago

Cold in Gardez


Stories about ponies are stories about people.

E

In the library of Twilight Sparkle's castle, there is a book where none should be. There is no record of it being entered into the collection. It is not in the card catalog. It has never been checked out. Before yesterday nopony knew it existed.

It is the only book she has ever tried to destroy.


Written as an entry in GaPJaxie's My Little Speed Writing Competition, which gives you 60 minutes to write a story based on a prompt chosen by the masses. Join us in the Discord if you're interested in improving your writing skills!

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 42 )

A good short thriller might be just what I need today. :twilightsmile:

I want more

A very good lesson to learn. We can change if we have the desire and find those who will believe in us. But one has to want to chance before anything else.

“But maybe he can change too. Maybe that’s why he came back.”

Celestia fixed her student with the most firm gaze possible. "Twilight Sparkle," she stated in a voice that brooked no disobedience, "you may have grown from my student into a princess of your own, but this is beyond your powers. Even Luna and myself can not--"

"Luna and I," said Twilight almost automatically. Celestia did not seem upset at all about being interrupted, but the faintest ghost of a smile came over her stern expression.

"Perhaps I am wrong," she said. "To change, he will need more than a princess. He will need... an editor."

Twilight Sparkle swallowed, then produced a red pencil. "I believe I can do this, Princess. Let me try, at least."

Dark, thrilling and interesting. I'm guessing from what I read that this is like Full Metal Alchemist where the book is the souls of ponies of the past?

Oh well done indeed. So Starlight will now become the last necromancer, and most likely never use her new knowledge. Or maybe she's going to be the one who will quiet the restless dead, using forsaken magic. or maybe she'll give some old pony some peace.

Interesting. That went way different than I was expecting, and the final note was agreeable.

Heh. I haven't heard the best of souls in books. They tend to write back.

Points to anyone who gets it.

Thought it was going to be an SCP-140 story with a pony world twist.

9802816
Well, I know of 2. Tom Riddle and Malchior.

9802831
Yup, that's right! :eeyup:

Tom Riddle, that is. Didn't know about the other one.

Comment posted by Cerulean Blue deleted Aug 27th, 2019

Good stuff. Twilight might have come to this conclusion on her own, but not with Celestia looking over her withers. Starlight's outside perspective can be truly invaluable at times.

This was excellent.

The only criticism I have is that it looks like the time limit caught you at the end. It's only noticeable because of the dense build up and (for its size) slow burn reveal of what the book actually is. I'd like to say something smarter and more helpful here than "its rushed" but that's all I got. Twilight's last line feels kinda silly and cutesy and I'm not sure that was what you were going for.

Still!!!

Good spooky lore (I wonder if it will be referenced in TWiFwM), use of the princesses as set pieces to amp the mood, the whole thing feels like a bottle episode in the best way, I love it. Would adore seeing this polished up.

give this a rewrite with no time limit it deserves it

"He thought he was doing good... he thought he would be helping ponies when he did this," Celestia sighed as she laid the book down. "How could he have known... how could any of us have known the horror he would release upon our world..."

They all stared at the tome of utter abomination: "MLP: FiM Season 9 Finale Script".

:trollestia:

You write the best spooky pony magic stories.

[undignified begging]
Pleeeeeeeeease, can you continue Land of the Blind????
[/undignified begging]

I really, really like where this is heading. Tell me there's more?

I mean, they already taught him that fire is bad, right?

Oh, I like this. :pinkiehappy:

i like where this is going and wish there is a sequel

Any fool can read a book to the end. But to complete a book, it must be understood by the heart and soul of the reader.

Good luck, Starlight Glimmer.

“Is that your solution to every problem?” Luna asked. Her voice could have etched metal.

You’re right, I should have destroyed it, like I should have destroyed you. Bitch.

Nooooooo I WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SHE READS IT!!!!!

On the plus side, not having a definite ending means I'm free to imagine my own. I like to believe that Starlight is right, that Sarcophagus has changed and can be returned to life or find peace. (Assuming it is Sarcophagus; if I had one critique, I would say that it was difficult to tell if the book WAS Sarcophagus, or if he used his infernal magics to make ANOTHER pony into the book. That, and the title image was confusing since it made me think this was about the creation book from that Spike and Rarity episode. Unless it was?) All in all, very nice job, I enjoyed reading it and it didn't COMPLETELY freak me out, which is a good thing in my book. =Dd

9804391
agreed, this deserves a sequel.

Sarcophagus’s Third Idea: An Exploration and a Proposal for the Good of all Ponies

A very harmless and benevolent sounding title, lol, it reminds me a little bit of:

A Modest Proposal For preventing the Children of Poor People From being a Burthen to Their Parents or Country, and For making them Beneficial to the Publick

Which proposes that impoverishment of Irish families be solved by selling their children as foodstock.

In fairness A Modest Proposal is clearly a political satire though, and not a serious proposal.

9807073
I'm pretty sure it's Sarcophagus. I think it's a book of necromancy, and if he was the one who succeeded at figuring out eternal life, turning another pony into a book doesn't guarantee the knowledge would be read again- the other pony (since the book is at least semi-sentient, and able to perform some magic) could either wipe the relevant pages or stick them together so they can't be read. If he turns himself into a book, then not only does the book already contain all his knowledge, secrets and wisdom, but he also controls who can read it. And if it is him, and he's the greatest necromancer ever (which I think is likely) then that's a very powerful book indeed.

9817329
Be sure to eat all of your soylent green!

An academic in Sweden has come up with a novel way to fight climate change - cannibalism.
...
Last year controversial scientist and author Richard Dawkins suggested humanity needed to "overcome its taboo" and consider eating lab-grown human meat.

"the common good" or "greater good" ect ect is the war-cry of every nutjob ever.

Whoops, I caught a logistical error!

This line

Twilight Sparkle had spent the past four days carefully inscribing with diamond-tipped styluses,

is later contradicted by this line:

It appeared on the Life Sciences shelf in the library yesterday.

Cant have been both yesterday and four days ago! I totally missed it the first time.

It would not be burned twice. More than a thing of paper and glue and binding, the book was an idea. It was immortal.

Did V write that part?
(V for Vendetta)

“It appeared on the Life Sciences shelf in the library yesterday.

Of all the librarys in all the world... it had to walk into mine!

And it became BFF with the book of might have beens.....the end!

9806568
His edginess could have etched metal.

9821106
It's entirely possible Twilight had been working on wards for reasons unrelated to the book, and the book's presence dictated a sudden new need for them (and possibly, a higher priority on completing them).

10104264
Holy crud, someone's on the ball! Thanks!

10104269
*slaps face* 🤦‍♂️
Oh, not for you ^^’ the fact I have to share this with him https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/881333/question-why-dont-dramatic-readers-share

Hoooo I'd buy a full length novel of this by you

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