Rainbow Dash writes her first novella. It's a very serious book about serious topics. She asks her friends to proofread. This should go well.

Chapters (2)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 111 )

Sounds about right.

That title. Are you sure you haven't been replaced with a Super Trampoline alt?

Ah, the trusty, "If I'm not good at something immediately, it must not be what I'm good at." I never leave home without it.

Ah yes, a brilliant exposè in the horrors of authorial technique. Brava sir, brava.

"Slice of life"

I'm in this photo and I don't like it

“That's Writing 101.” Rarity gestured. “The shorter the better.

Wait... who wrote this fic again?


wtf is twis response to all his

Exactly what I was thinking! Even before I saw who authored it I thought just that.

I expected Pinkie to get the inspiration to bake cupcakes... with ample assistance from Rainbow Dash. :pinkiecrazy:

Also, had she posted this fic on Furaffinity... it probably would have gotten tons of likes.

Or, if she'd turned it into a Shmentai (sorry, Lord Nuxanor, I must steal your cute little title for Japanese cartoon pr0n), it would have a cult following.

I feel like everyone on this site needs to read this at least once. Actually, everyone on every fan fiction site.

10140069 It's okay to forget the perspective of background ponies

10140097 Every new writer needs to read this, and some more 'experienced' ones as well.

"I wanna be defined by the things that I love
Not the things I hate
Not the things I'm afraid of, I'm afraid of
The things that haunt me in the middle of the night, I
I just think that you are what you love" -Taylor Swift

So go on Dash, draw Flash Sentry in the frilliest dress you can imagine. It's not my thing, but I guess not everyone appreciates Big Rusty Meat Grinders

Kind of hungry for soup now. IDK why.


Who do you think Discord hired to kill Dashie?

No it's ghentee-oy, not Shmentai. :rainbowwild: ALL HAIL LORD NUXANOR! :rainbowlaugh:

Me thinks Rainbow Dash should start drawing cute princesses in pink dresses and flouncy gowns. That would do the trick. Mhmm. I’m running out of material here.

This is so true it made me laugh. Can't even count the times stuff like that happened to me, though I didn't have a friend like Rarity trying to encourage me to continue. Still, damn awesome. :rainbowlaugh::heart:

Well it's a far sight better than 'Ponies being slowly being drowned in a horrible magical escapist act'.

It still won't ever beat 'Ponies slowly asphyxiating in space while trying to duel with banjos'.

To be fair, such a premise has way more traction in Equestria due to the existence of cutie marks.

This made me giggle

Merry Soup is a great name for a pony who gets torture to death in a comedy.

And everyone knows the real reason AJ didn't review the story is that she can't read.

Are you making fun of Background Pony?

Well. That was something. Moral of the story kids: even when your first draft is an absolute train wreck and your friends can't read it, there'll always be a book horse to help you out.


And everyone knows the real reason AJ didn't review the story is that she can't read.


It's okay to forget the perspective of background ponies

Shots fired!

This tale should be added as a footnote to FiMFiction's Writing Guide.

Edit: Approved for Twilight's Library

This was quite the experience

Is anyone else concerned for the mental state of that poor, abused typewriter?

Comment posted by Super Trampoline deleted Mar 21st, 2020

Ask yourself, have you ever seen Super Trampoline and shortskirtsandexplosions in the same room? Or Imploding Colon? Or blue harvest? Or Just Essay? Or dayoldspaghetti? No, I THINK NOT!

Because skirts is a recluse who extremely rarely goes to Pony cons.

I'm tempted to write (a much shorter than novella) actual version of this.

more like "thousands of tiny shredded ribbons of life", amirite?

"Don't worry typewriter, you're not alive, Rainbow's draft can't hurt you..."

faint clicking noises

I like to imagine she's secreted herself away in her Happy Library to curl up in a ball, attended by Spike. She could handle the grim and horrifying content – even be proud of Rainbow's vocabulary's growth – but she could not handle Rainbow's bastardization of the basic rules of literature. :twilightoops:

It would look something like this:

EVernacular Torture
Twilight is restrained, unable to fight back the horrible words that Rainbow Dash is telling her.
Defecatus Piccolitus · 1.2k words  ·  82  13 · 2.1k views

"The countless squishy ribbons of flesh that are the physical manifestation of the results of Merry Soup's entire life covered in the glinting deep scarlet of freshly squeezed blood and interspersed with tiny fragments of bones such as the scapula and humerus and femur and tibia and [list remaining 201 bones] with their sharp and broken edges ready to pierce anypony who would touch the mutilated and rended remains that were the material proof of her existence and gruesome end if any such pony brave enough did exist and it would be sad if nopony knew of Merry's grim death as her parents searched and searched and held out hope that their precious filly might come back someday while the torn remains of her corpse rotted in a dark alley never to be seen again and so would her story would never be known though it is hard to imagine what one could learn from examining the results of her slowly being put through a big rusty meat grinder" right?

Sorry. It hurt to write this.

Come back, commas, I love you! You too, periods!

On one hand the bondage in that story is kind of hot. On the other hand the story is not particularly well written and vaguely racist. So I'm conflicted. It did give me an idea for a RariTwi story though. So, uh, meh? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Her pupils shrank as she slumped back in a moment of epitome.


“ FIVE?!? ” Fluttershy fell flat on her face, openly sobbing. “Ohhhhhhh the Equinity!!!” Tears formed a pool on the tile floor. “That poor... poor Merry Soup! She... she j-just wanted to go to a Daring Do convention!” More sobs—almost howling at this point. “Why did those big meanies have to coax her into a dark alley with the guise of taking a sample survey for the Wonderbolts fan club?”

she actually gave a book about ponies getting murdered in the most brutal ways possible to fluttershy? your an idiot RD

So basically Dash wrote Rainbow Factory.

“I spent a f-full day rambling to Discord about it. He said something about g-going to the deep web of the chaos realm to put a 'hit' on Rainbow Dash... whatever that means...”


Oh nooooooo...



I give this fic a "Dafuq did I just read?" out of a possible "shortskirtsandexplosions".

Still laughing ten minutes later! :rainbowlaugh:

Even I thought Pinkie enjoyed that too much...

And I'm the insane one...

“Your second draft would be at least twenty percent shorter!” She blinked hard. Her pupils shrank as she slumped back in a moment of epitome. “Oh dear Celestia, I think I've pierced reality.”

Honestly, for me, it's always like this.

“You mean your horrifically violent and disturbingly detailed exercise in snuff fetishization?”

Well put, Pinks.

No, no, I'm pretty sure Skirts knew what he was writing at that moment. Just let it sink in...

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!