Deadpool in Equestria

by MrAquino

Not so annoying here. Dragon #1: Spike

Unaware of the couple, Deadpool was still at their door with his ear on their door, listening to what they're saying.

OH S**T!!! IT'S DOCTOR WHO!!!

Do you know anything of that?

Yeah I do!!! It's a british Bill & Ted knockoff.

Ugh! Dumb***, it existed before Bill & Ted; it was made in 1963.

Wait, really?

Yes.

Then... that means... MY GOD!!! THE ILLUMINATI IS BEHIND THIS!!!

N***A!!!

"Hello?" a voice asked. Deadpool screamed like a woman, causing him to trip and fall into the bushes next to the house. He looked up and saw Twilight had snuck up on him. "Oh! I'm so sorry Deadpool. How were the Hooves family?"

"Splendid." He replied, trying not to be so surprised

"Why were you sneaking around their house then? You know what they're like, right?"

Tell her about the Illuminati!!!

SHUT THE F**K UP WITH THE ILLUMINATI BULLS**T!!!

"Are we done yet?" a young boyish sounding voice asked

"Almost. Spike, meet Deadpool. Deadpool, Spike." Deadpool turned his head down more forward and saw the purple with green scaled baby dragon.

"Hello Mr. Deadpool, I'm Spike, the-"

"DRAGON!!!" Deadpool yelled. He teleported in a puff of smoke and football kicked the dragon, sending him past a napping Rainbow Dash on a cloud, and half way across Ponyville.

"DEADPOOL!!!" Twilight yelled angrily "SPIKE ISN'T DANGEROUS!!!"

"I know," Deadpool replied "he was annoying."

"...WHAT!?!?!?"

"LET'S GET HIM!!! (I need to see how far he went though)" Deadpool teleported away, following the airborne Spike. He stopped and landed on one of the roofs, seeing a black dot in the sky that was Spike. "Where will he land?"

Well, by the looks of your kick and force, you kicked him up in the air at a near perfect 75 degrees with perhaps-

"English, dude!"

Alright. He'll land in the market area. I suggest you keep listening to-

Nah!!! Let's just catch him like the football he is!!!

"Great idea myself!!!" He teleported into the market, ironically, next to a football stand. The screams of Spike falling became louder and louder by the second. "Can I borrow this stuff for a sec? I gotta save a Dragon's life."

"Sure." a tan colored stallion replied. Deadpool put on the torso and helmet on. Deadpool prepared himself, as Spike was falling right to him!!! He felt the force of the small dragon hitting his chest, causing him to roll in circles across the floor a bit, but landed on his feet, with an unconscious Spike in his arms.

"WOO!!! YEAH!!! TOUCHDOWN!!! IGN: 10 OUT OF 10!!! SUCK IT LOGAN!!!" He stopped and saw the crowd stare at him awkwardly. "uh... hoofball." All the stallions cheered with him at the mention of Equestria's form of American Football. Spike began to groan a bit.

"What happened?" the dragon asked

"Spike!" Deadpool yelled, acting like a father "How many times did Twilight tell you that you can't fly!!! I know it sucks, but you gotta deal with it."

"Why are you in Hoofball gear?"

"I saved your life!"

"Oh... Really!?!?!?"

"I did indeed!!! No need to thank me!!!"

"WOW!!! You're like... A Superhero!!!

"That's what I am."

"REALLY!?!?!? Can we... hang out?"

"Aren't we doing that already?"

"OH! You're right! Hey, I now a place where we can hang out at. Follow me!"

"Alright, just let me return this Hoofball equipment I borrowed to save your life."

"Alright, let's make it quick, come on!!!"

After a quick drop off of the Hoofball equipment, the duo went to Ponyville's park. Many mares and stallions were there, some having a picnic, others on dates, and a couple just hanging out together as friends. There's no doubt that some of the ponies stared at Deadpool with Spike, who sat down at a random bench. Deadpool pulled out the bag Derpy gave him and pulled out some muffins for the two to share. Spike enjoyed his muffin (a delicious chocolate chip) but watched Deadpool lift the bottom of his mask to eat his. Spike stared at the very messed up looking jaw. Deadpool looked back and saw the dragon staring at him.

"Eat your Veggies and you won't get this." Deadpool simply stated before taking his first bite (banana nut flavor). Spike didn't respond, but was mentally scarred for life; Eat his veggies or be ugly like Deadpool, now that was a bit disturbing.

"So... beautiful day we're having." Spike simply said, not trying to acknowledge Deadpool's scarred bottom lips.

"It is."

"How long have you been here?"

"This is my second day."

"Oh... You meet Twilight and her friends?"

"Yep."

"How were they?"

"Fluttershy made me 'Dawwed' a bit, Twilight was a complete nerd, Rainbow Dash kicked me a**, Applejack helped me get my finger flipping arm back, Pinkie Pie & I had a great time, and Rarity made me a bad*** suit."

"Oh... meet any pony else."

"Well, Lyra summoned me, which is why I'm here. There was that DJ, Vinyl Scratch, from Last night. She's pretty cool to hang out with, I guess. then I meet Princess Mooncheeks."

"Mooncheeks?"

"Sorry, I mean Princess Luna."

"PRINCESS LUNA!?!?!?!? You meet Princess Luna in your dream!?!?!?"

"Yeah. As I was saying, she-"

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!! She usually appears to foals in dreams, but with you, THAT'S AN HONOR AMONG HONORS!!!"

"...really?"

"Yeah!!! What did she tell you? What is your mission?"

"Well... she told me to-"

"SPIKE!!!" Twilight's voice yelled. Deadpool jumped a bit and put his mask back on. Twilight ran and grabbed Spike, snuggling him like how Fluttershy did to Deadpool's head. She turned his attention and gave Deadpool a death stare.

"Twilight!" Spike yelled "You won't believe it!"

"I would. Deadpool kicking you to the town market? That's just messed up."

"What? No, Luna came into his dream."

"Wait... Princess Luna!?!?!?"

"Yeah!"

"Princess Luna, the princess of the night AND dream master, went into Deadpool's dream."

"That's what he said."

"It's true." Deadpool acknowledged.

"Oh," Twilight said, not believing him "And what did Princess Luna told you?"

"That I have to take a selfie with everypony."

"...a selfie... with... everypony?"

"That's what she said."

"Right... I'll send in a letter to Luna and see if what you're telling is the truth."

"Go ahead."

"You're... serious?"

"Go right ahead." The two stared at each other a bit.

"Fine! I guess you're telling the truth."

"SWEET!!!"

"Quick question." Spike began.

"yes?"

"Did you really kick me?"

"yes."

"wow... how high did I go?"

"R. Kelly would've been proud."

"I... don't get it."

"Doesn't matter. Let's capture this GOOD memory together, what do you say?"

"Uh... sure." Deadpool picked up the dragon in one of his arms.

"SELFIE!!!" a Picture was snapped. Deadpool looked up at his phone: 13% was left "AW C***!!! Where can I go to recharge my phone!?!?!?

Author's Note:

DAMN YOU APPLE!!! Where should Deadpool go and who will he meet next?

Comments

[IntentWings31]

Discord!!!!!

[FrostTheWolf]

Deadpool meets Discord and they go for tacos. FRIENDSHIP!

[The Corset]

Discord

[3volve]

deadpool

[MrAquino]

5342226 so... You want Deadpool to talk to some random stallions while p***Ing before killing them?

[3volve]

maybe maybe not (lol)

[soulChaser]

Dudes Deadpool meets Discord lets hope it doesnt get to hecktech

[Gobeman]

I AM HAVING A RAGING.....BUTTERSHY

[Radioactive Dragon]

5818690 mmmm butter..

[DarkSpider]

5342370 HAHAHA!! That'd be hilarious

[D1killi4]

"R. Kelly would've been proud."

Wow... I can’t believe he actually said that 😐