You think my weapons make me dangerous? Good, keep thinking that.
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After an urgent summon from Fancy Pants, both Celestia and Luna attend Day court. However, a new precedent is set when Fancy Pants presents a male alicorn to the two princessess, one he found dumpster diving behind his house.
Not much else to say without spoiling a lot of the story. Just jump in and heave a read!
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I smell a bunch of shenanigans will be a hoof.
I mean, dumpster diving is a valid anarchist hobby.
I mean, I’ll see where it goes
Robots in Disguise!
Nah. Just add a second chapter. Then a third....
Okay you have my attention. Onward to misadventures!
Well, this is off to a good start, can't wait to see where you take this!
be an adult
‘Everythin’?’ She has a country accent?
Hmm. This looks promising, dumpster diving as an introduction for the MC is unique. Don't worry Orian Pax you need to die to become Optimus Prime.
9819266
Then a fourth and a fifth and oh... about a bunch more words after that.
This seem like a good start a few errors but nothing harmful to the overall story keep this up and I at the very lest will enjoy it. PS. Slow down any romance don't force it let the personalizes direct everything.
... caught my interest... how often do you plan on updating this?
This has a lot of potential if you can manage to avoid the usual pitfalls. Please remember that it's a fish out of water inversion comedy, not an author-insert wish fulfillment fic. And please don't keep your protagonist forever a depressed idiot who can't accept the fact that his situation is improving. Keep it funny, but allow him to grow.
It's a fine line, but if you can walk it, this can be a great story.
Celestia, "Huh"
Neat!
9819443
Nope. Like I said, the chapter was written on my phone during a car trip. I'm surprised it doesn't have more typos
9819539
As much as I can?
9819306
It has been corrected
9819533
I'll see what I can do!
I originally had a long list of errors I have noticed, although none of them were really glaring enough to deviate away from the fic. So nevermind, I guess.
LOL
You're off to a heckin' good start, and this tickles my guilty pleasure of humans turned into Alicorn OCs in Equestria just right. I'm eager to see where this goes.
Dis gon be gud.
9819752
Thank you
There are more stories like this? Show them to me good sir!
9819696
I've been writing a lot on my phone lately. One of the reasons I love this site's editor since I can write anywhere, anytime
9819759
There aren't too many like this one. This is one of the first ones I've actually run into with a decent rating and a main character who is turned into an Alicorn right off the bat without trying to take the piss out of the concept of turning the main character into something so powerful and influential. "The Alicorn of Music" is probably the only other one I've read that goes for it right out of the gate and has gotten further than chapter one. As for stories where the human ends up becoming an Alicorn after an intermediate step, you've got a fair amount to choose from - the branch of "I'm not a Brony, get me out of Equestria!" that leads to T.D. The Alicorn Princess, and a few other, lengthy and long-form stories that eventually lead to the MC becoming an Alicorn, like Hiver's saga.
9819766
Thanks! I will give them a read!
9819769
Have fun! Just keep in mind that they're very long tales, and can take a few days to read, even on a binge. Whatever you do though, don't copy them, and do your own thing! I like what you've got going so far.
Lets start with 50 chapters...
Well. That happened.
9819801
Easy there
9819807
Yeah, I don't know what to say
I need to see where this story goes. Another chapter!
9819843
I've been getting that a lot ever since I published the first chapter
9819846
Well, you made damn good first chapter.
This was fun, heh. I'll be keeping my eye on this.
9819766
I'll second these recommendations, particularly Hiver's Pageverse. Book 7 is being posted at the moment, but you should start with Book 1, "New Beginnings".
9819887
Thank you! Hope I can keep it up
Okay, this is great. Ironically, one of the OCs in a RWBY fic I'm writing has the same name.
Oh I can't wait for the first lessons on magic and how in his first try, either only push some sparks, thinks levitating is the most awesome thing ever. Or dispel something that hit Discord and turn him into that weird flower thing Daffy Duck was turn once.
Well, it started really interesting. I like the character. And then it turns out it's yet another Human in Equestria fic. The character seems like more than a self-insert, at least. I hope he doesn't get more of his memory back. I don't want to read about his life on Earth. I want to read about an alicorn with no memory trying to re-learn stuff.
Sorry, couldn't resist. I like where this is going and I can't wait to see more
Well my friend, it seems that you have made a hit sensation in your car ride! I would be happy to help with any terminology problems you have! Just let me know and continue to make this comedy gold!
Other than perhaps a Beta, I see nothing wrong with this. If you ever seek one, I suppose I'd be up for it.
"Orion Pax? Seriously? Why didn't I just say Optimus Prime? And Terra? Stupid! Stupid!"
Also I edit and proof read for other authors here on the site. If you desire help let me know and drop me a PM.
9820063
I wouldn't go that far
But thank you!
Well now, this should be interesting.
Love the begining, hope to see some slow progress and ALOT of interactions between Celestia and Luna. Had my fill with crazy Twilight experimenting and probing to get answers. Would like to finally see a story where hes not pressed for answers but given the benefit of doubt while also being cared for and watched over in an unobtrusive way so he doesent go balistic. (happens alot sadly in many stories)
Oh and dont touch the art cover. I think thats what brought me here more than the title (which is also simple but fits great). Anything more and it would feel complicated and redact from the story itself but still bring the focus on the main character and how he looks like (the best kind of cover)
9820327
I know what you mean. As the story goes on, thing spiral out of control rapidly. Don't worry though, I also don't like the MC going balistic
As for the cover art... but I relly wanna' expand it
I think this will be a great story. Looking forward to more.
The fact that the only male Alicorn is looking for food in the trash and has no idea who he is. Gonna be a shock to the Celestia , Luna, Cadanza and Twilight, and the pony races, as Alicorns are seen as royalty to some degree and well he is the only male alicorn so you what that means their no way anyone is gonna let him even leave Equestria any time soon when their a chance for alicorns to be reborn once more and no longer at risk of dying out. And alot of female ponies including celestia, luna and maybe twilight are gonna in time fall in love with him, added that their has never been a male alicorn, and he has no where to really go it won't be hard to keep him around if they can just keep him from going to the trash for food. I assume in his life before this he was poor and had to do this alot.
9820013
If he knows who Orion Pax and Optimus Prime are, I think it's safe to say ALL his memories are intact. You'll see how he handles his "memory loss" in the next chapter. Don't worry though, his life on Earth won't be explored much, only tidbits, a sentece or two long, Orion will share from time to time. This story is about Orion adjusting to his new form and life.
You know, I think this story would be more interesting if the memory loss was legitimate rather than faked. I don’t see how him being a human would add to the story.