• Member Since 23rd Dec, 2013
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Oroboro


Employed layabout with not enough free time to write about horses.


T
Source

Rarity can see it clearly.

The way Applejack laughs around Coloratura, the way she smiles. The way Coloratura hangs on Applejack's every word, the way her eyes light up whenever they glance at each other.

Friends since fillyhood, Applejack and Coloratura share a relationship deeper and more special than most ponies will ever know.

But Rarity and Applejack were fillyhood friends too. Shouldn't that be just as special?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 46 )

*looks at title* muuussssttt reeeeeaaaddd

I like it. I like it a lot and would be surprised if this didn't get featured. It's just that...

With hindsight and the wisdom of adulthood, it was easy to see where she had gone wrong as a child.

I'll never understand what this 'child' thing is. I mean, someone in the show probably already said it but is the word 'filly' so bad?

I haven't read the story, but I thought Rarity and Applejack were only acquaintances until Twilight showed up.

Ah, someone beat me to the punch. Well done here. :twilightsmile:

Two Virgin Mojito’s for Rara and RarityRarara!

Ftfy

Oh, this was adorable. :ajsmug:

I was really looking forward to reading this. But, tbh it ultimately fell pretty flat for me. The beginning was promising, and I felt like you set it up well with the scene at the table, Rarity's feelings and introspection etc., and what followed for the bulk of the story...the concept was strong. It was the ending that should have tied it all together and which IMO did not that ended up leaving me coming away dissatisfied.

I think because I have the impression it was supposed to be a positive ending for all the characters, but given what happens I don't understand how Rarity at least came out of things feeling any better. Nothing about what happened in the past (how all of her own efforts to reach Applejack failed and yet Rara managed to change her whole outlook, even worse when you consider Rarity/AJ's sour canon relations at the beginning of the series in LBYS) was changed, nor that AJ and Rara apparently still have such a special connection in spite of years apart. Basically, you tell us through Rara's dialogue that Rarity was somehow special and valued to AJ, but never actually show us how she is/was at any point in the narrative or through any of AJ's own words or actions...Applejack frowns at Rarity a bunch during the beginning, leaves an obviously intoxicated Rarity to fend for herself while she walks Rara to her hotel, was distant and frustrated with her as a child despite Rarity trying everything to cheer her up......and that's all we see of her. As a result, I have a really hard time believing Rarity would have been so instantly comforted and had her whole outlook turned around like that by some bittersweet comments from Applejack through Rara about her childhood self.

So, yeah...promising story in a lot of ways and I'm a fan of a lot of your stories, I just think this one could have used a lot more fleshing out to take it to where it seems you wanted it to go.

Well, that was feelsy and kind of sweet. Even if it felt a bit more shippy than friendly.:trollestia:

That was super-sweet, :twilightsmile:
s6.postimg.org/5pzpmopep/Pirate_Approved2.jpg

And JEEZUS, Rarity, lay off the sauce! :flutterrage:

This was a nice little one shot. Enjoyed getting into Rarity's head on the matter and the conflict. I hope we can see more fics on the relationship aspect between Rarity, AJ, and Rara--friendship or otherwise. :twilightsmile:

6709979
I do understand where you're coming from. And the concept of Rarity and Applejack being friends in childhood does require a leap of faith on the reader's part given what we know. But I kind of like the way the author does it here: it's more open ended.
Everything is not wrapped up neatly or perfectly and that more reflects life as we know it. Questions do go unanswered. AJ really could just be closer to Rara or it's just the fact that Rara is here now after so long. Maybe Rarity is reacting off of Rara succeeding so easily in an area with AJ she put so much effort into figuring out or the emotion could run far deeper.
You just don't know. But that means the ending isn't set in stone either and there are more than one way to interpret. What is known is that Rara and Rarity have extended a bridge and at least began putting some of the pieces together. With some of the main issues out of the way things can can start looking up. AJ herself isn't really needed for this if you see the story more of a focus is on Rara and Rarity and their conflict.

Always figured Rarity could get meloncholy easy.

So much jelly

6710591
The characters' pasts, the nature of their relationship(s) and feelings for each other beneath the surface is irrelevant to what I was trying to convey by my comment. I'm not asking for perfect answers to everything or a neat and happy ending to everything either, or saying that's what there should be. If anything, given the circumstances set in the story I'd actually say this outcome feels way too happy and easy...that's kind of my problem with it.

This could probably be expanded upon if the author had wanted to touch on some of the things you raised if it was meant to be more than a one shot. I do think it's probably strongest as a one shot, as it is, but my problem is how things unfold given the factors that the story clearly does establish. Basically and again, I see no way for Rarity's jealously and sadness to have been cleared up just like that, just because Rara tells her Applejack appreciated her generous nature as a filly even if she never actually told Rarity so (and still called Rarity annoying, prissy, fussy etc all in the same breath). Rarity's problem throughout the story til the very end, even the name of the chapter, is that she envies Rara's connection with Applejack. As nothing in the story ever happens to prove to her that she really has no reason to envy such a thing, and actually everything we see just seems to reinforce that Rarity actually has every reason to feel the way she does, the ending feels way too quick, simple, and as a result insincere to me I guess.

Rara sis boom ba! It didn't end with shipping or a trip to the spa!

6710591
6709979

Yeah, to be honest, I can see both arguments. There is a part of me that wanted to see that final scene happen between Applejack and Rarity instead, or at least have it happen when Applejack is also present. Part of this is because I feel like this fic does a great job exploring the younger versions of AJ and Rarity, and would like to see the payoff of that as adults.

But I also wonder if that isn't me wanting this fic to be something it isn't. For one thing I'm a shameless RariJack shipper, so I'm a big fan of most stories that explore their dynamics. But there is absolutely nothing that suggests Rarity's jealousy (envy?) is romantically motivated. This is further colored by the fact that I love Ooroboro's other RariJack works on the site. Not to say I don't also enjoy stories about Rarity and Applejack's friendship, but...

It may be that my desire stems from wanting to make this story about a character it isn't actually about. If you look at this as a story about Rarity, Applejack, and RaRa, then some of what I said is valid, but I kind of feel that, in the end, the story is about Rarity. Applejack and RaRa just feature.


Either way, I really like this story. It's a great characterization of Rarity. And I would love to read future stories exploring this dynamic furthur.

6710789
For me personally I'm not asking for this story to be romantic or whatever. Or explore the interpersonal relationships more, necessarily. I just feel like Rarity's emotional turnaround happened way too suddenly to feel believable given the events of the story. So either more should happen to make her seeing the light make sense, or maybe she should come away from it all still questioning stuff. A more bittersweet conclusion maybe.

:raritywink:That was cute. I think it was really helped by the lack of input from AJ. We really got to see everything from Rarity's perspective so nothing was just flatly cleared up by AJ.

I have to agree with Barbed Pegasus. The ending has no substance, emotional or... well, anything else really. Really good setup, then just...

Rara: Oops left my purse. Hey, cheer up. I was so jelly of you when I was a kid.
Rarity: Really? Cool, AJ thought I was good enough to brag about. Let's get drinks and leave!
/end

Nothing actually gets resolved. Even if AJ thought well of her back then, she basically brushed Rarity off now and from the way things started out I could almost imagine that AJ and Rara were about to start tongue-fencing while Rarity watched and cried. The ending could have been more meaningful, more sensible.
It's clear to everyone that this story had one acceptable ending. Three-way tongue battle!

This was rather interesting. Pretty good. :twilightsmile:

6710939 Normally I'd agree, or, put in a stipulation that it was so be a "hopeful" ending, where someone would work past their problems to confess their feelings in the end.

HOWEVER

As one who, like Rarity, gives themselves up to everything to keep people happy, I for one can actually speak on her behalf. Envy, and jealousy, as stupid as it is, even if it's acknowledged can drive a wedge into the heart and mind. Rare's drunken state sure didn't help much, but digressing, it's just feelings, that can make one feel... off. Strange, or easily annoyed. False smiles, and 'sincere' chats, can actually build up to something much worse. (As I'm sure you were hoping for. :P As for it is the stake of a story, for entertainment, etc.) I, though can understand just how easily one can feel after 'letting off steam' or to find similarities in another. Consolation is much more soothing than most would think.

Eh, it was a decent story, and it's always nice to see the background characters and one-shots get attention like this... but I gotta agree with some of the others here, Oro; this isn't some of your best work.

Honestly don't know if adding anything to it would help, and I don't want to just parrot what other people have said, but this story doesn't really feel like it has an ending, just a point where it suddenly stops. IDK, maybe I'm not thinking clearly, I haven't slept in nearly 24 hours when started writing this.

Even for a one-shot, that ending was too short. Enjoyable, though

Cute short story.

Dear God! The Ho Yay readings are off the charts!

I rate tis story...
7.5 out of 10 moustaches

:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moust

Solid story, for its length. Thought the ending scene could've been just a tad longer, but other than that, I have no complaints or critiques to offer. Well done, well done indeed, have a like and a favorite. :twilightsmile:

I wanted to write this same story so bad. I don't even ship. I'm super glad someone wrote it.

6711330

But that's not what happened here. I am also of the self-sacrificing sort, my martyr card has plenty of stamps on it. The story is missing something, not that the in-world events and personalities brought this about.

Really great story, I loved it! :raritywink:

This is cute! Thought this would go into some over-rated romance story, seeing the T sign. But when I read it, I was super impressed! Nicely done!

and this is how it all started :trollestia:

The bat thing! With the apples, and all that nonsense. Yes, lovely story. You should tell us all about it, Fluttershy!

:fluttershyouch:Um, how 'bout I smack you upside the head Rarity?

She recognized the foul stench of jealousy when it reared its ugly head.

Those lovely green eyes always bring out the Green Eyed Monster in ponies around Applejack. Unintentionally of course.

Not once could Rarity ever remember Applejack laughing so hard at one of Rarity's jokes.

Rarity doesn't have much of a sense of humor.

Mostly just spent a lot of time failing to learn from Auntie and Uncle Orange.

Did she get to meet her baby cousin Babs?

Manehattan wasn't fun. I hated it. I thought that after my… I just needed to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. I needed to find myself and where I really belonged.

She belongs at Rarity's side.

Butts in your seats and mouths shut,

Cheerilee's father is always like this on the first day of school.

There was no way a plan this genius could fail.
***
“Dear Applejack,
How are you doing at Camp Friendship? I am quite well.”

Two scenes from her childhood? You're gonna make me Feel Sir Author, aren't you?

She brought Applejack new dresses every week to try and find something that would fit her style. She brought flowers, scheduled makeovers, and even lent her some of her favorite romance novels.

She is in love with you Applejack. Can't you see?

I shared my own woes with her too, though that's beside the point.”

"As a foal I was abandoned in the forest and left to die. I was raised by woodland critters until the age of six, when a drunken master found me and raised me as his daughter. He taught me how to fight, how to kill, until one night:
And now comes the last part of your training, in which I abandon you so you can become a bitter, hateful mare. Just like my master did to me.
But sensei, you promised never to leave me!
Yes, so you could become more hateful than I ever was!
No, noo!
And then he left."

But she also told me...she tried to be there for Applejack when she needed it meant a lot to her.

Aww. That's sweet. I wonder if that's why neither seem too fond of each other during their slumber party at Twilight's.

Very well done.

I thought this was a very sweet story.

I reviewed this story!

My review can be found here.

This is an awesome idea, and you did a great job with Rarity, and I'm right on board with the basis. But I do have an issue, and it's a slightly different issue with this fic from the ones other people have mentioned: filly AJ's actions feel OOC, which is kind of a problem because while there's not that much of her, it's those actions that are the core of the story.

I'll totally grant that we don't know much about filly AJ, and that her parents recently died, but in both scenes the dialogue didn't sound like her, and the reactions didn't feel like how she'd be acting based on how Rarity was treating her. Add that to what people have pointed out before about both AJ and Rarity's reactions to each other in Look Before You Sleep, and... I just wasn't getting any AJ here, even Rarity's point of view of AJ.

But it was an interesting read, and I know you're a great writer. Looking forward to the next one!

Rararararararara rararararararararara rararara rarararara rararararararara ra,

It was nice, but has nobody noticed the small spelling mistake in the first line?

Hmm. The story is solid, really. Amazing writing style, the emotions are captured well, but the resolution put the entire story at the edge. I couldn't see how the conflict was solved. "Telliing both sides of their sides, perhaps?" But the ending would have been much better if AJ was involved. At least she showed or told what she felt, or such.

Nonetheless, awesome story. :twilightsmile: Here's a Rarity: :duck:

Yay for friendship! Thumbs up.

I'm with the other reviewers on this story, didn't really feel the ending and Rarity being friends with Applejack since fillyhood doesn't really match up with their behaviour towards each other in early season 1 of the show. Still a good story, just not really your best. Have a like.

MJP

why can't you be AJ's rara

cause you are an asshole, that's why

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

I'm impressed how you managed to avoid any and all shipteasing. :D

But when rationality battled feelings, feelings tended to win.

Sentient Nature 101.

Where does Rara original formula keep her wallet?

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