• Member Since 6th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago


Pontiff of TwiDash


Flurry Heart is not the Princess of Love, but maybe she should be. She's certainly never met anypony able to match her taste in relationships. So many ponies with the wrong partners... It's sad, really. And then they have the audacity to say her pairings are wrong.

Written for the Writeoff's Ship It prompt.

Reading by StraightToThePointStudio

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 37 )
Legatus #1 · 1 week ago · · ·

Poor Flash Sentry
sir, it's elementary
For who else
Faces such belts
Of anger and hatred fury

I love the whole ordeal between the Shippers of Equestria.
Your OTP is trash though,
change my mind

I dont think i've ever seen anyone ship Applejack with Fluttershy, therefore, your otp is trash Cadance. Also, why must all of the main six be lesbian? Not that i have anything wrong with that, its just... why? Also, you forgot to ship pinkie in this fic.
My otp list:
Cheesy pie
bumblebee wrong show
Plus a few more that i cant think of at the moment

Hillbe #4 · 1 week ago · · 4 ·

:moustache: Didn't see that coming
:facehoof: and they buried the body under the schools fountain
:duck: :ajsmug: Spike? we need you
:moustache: wut?
:ajbemused::raritywink: Twilight said you had two :moustache: !

Poor Flash lol

axxuy #6 · 1 week ago · · 15 ·

Startrix and Fluttercord are canon, therefore otp. CheesePie is perfect as well. But the only pony Rainbow Dash belongs with is Twilight.

Shortmane #8 · 1 week ago · · 2 ·

Sillier than I expected, but a fun ride!
Pretty sure there's a typo...
"the lives of their lives were" I think should be "loves of their lives"
Cute, and also Rarijack is best ship!

Late_Night #9 · 1 week ago · · 17 ·


Startrix and Fluttercord are canon

howdy, author
what drugs are you on?
cuz whatever the fuck it is, it's gone real bad
the grand finale of mlp proves StarBurst is real, not to mention fluttercord is just a shitty meme pushed by fluttershy haters
and you're wrong too
sparity best ship

Got to side with flurry heart here with regards to rarijack, though raritwi (as done with the weary travelers) is also pretty good.

The fuck does spitfire have in common with rarity you crazy person it would never work.

More like DISPARITY.

Said guard removed his helmet. "Flash Sentry, your Highness." He held out his hoof for a shake.

That seems off...

Said guard removed his helmet. "Dead Horse Walking, your Highness." He held out his hoof for a shake.

#FIFY :trollestia:

Neece #13 · 1 week ago · · 3 ·

TwiDash and RariDash fight I'm my heart, but mono made me live RariTwy too.

Absolutely hilarious story though, I hope AJ and Rarity get happy together :twilightsmile:

Late_Night #14 · 1 week ago · · 11 ·

SPike and rARITY, you troglodyte

The grand finale he might not have watched yet, because it's still weeks away on the official schedule? (That said, yeah, I feel Starburst and Sparity are written poorly in canon but canon nonetheless)

Also, I still don't get how people associate Fluttercord with hating Fluttershy, given that it's the easiest way to make her immortal short of the lazy way of "they're all alicorns now". Seriously, natural lifespan isn't even the issue with "Twilight will not outlive her friends" because Rainbow Dash. Also, if you've ever seen nature in action you'd know why Fluttercord works.

Good heavens the amount of comments so far with negative feedback. Shippers be crazy.

"Applejack is obviously meant to be with Fluttershy. I thought I raised you better than this."

Well, you've already earned my approval.

But... how'd she do in processing and handling?

The only ending Flash Sentry deserves.

Bast #20 · 1 week ago · · ·

Right LOL

"Truce," Cadance replied. They both lunged at Flash Sentey, horns blazing with magical fire.

Sacrificed like a pawn in a game of chess :I

~ ps. the solution is obvious... FF can't work ... but FFF is the way to go!!!

short, sweet, and by golly highly enjoyable.

i expected flow charts made of magic, but a note book is hella cute.

and BTW: canonically they have slept with each other.


Twilight Sparkle appeared in the room, surrounded by four guards. "I got the Nightmare Cadance alarm, what's happening?"

Why would you put an alarm for a ruler of nation in your school?

Because Twilight is third in line to the throne (behind Celestia & Luna)

Flutterdash is best ship!

xoid #26 · 1 week ago · · ·

Huh. Look at all these wrong opinions in the comments. The only OTP is Rainbow Dash × Kitchen Sink. Everybody knows that!

Yall are wrong twirare is best ship!!!

YES, r/Enchanted Library gud

Thy Lord #29 · 1 week ago · · 2 ·


Wow the explosions happening down here. Might as well add some others to it.

Luna x Discord
Applejack x Celestia
Twilight x Cheerilee
Rarity x Rainbow

Poor flash :(

This story was a delightful little romp of amusing confusion all held together nicely with a bit of Flash Sentry bashing at the end. Good one.

Twilight Sparkle appeared in the room, surrounded by four guards. "I got the Nightmare Cadance alarm, what's happening?"

Very wise to install this.

To stir even more discussions here:

AppleDash! :rainbowlaugh::ajsmug:
*runs away*

This is scary accurate to two shippers arguing. Even down to the eventual mutual hatred of Flash.

There's so many downvotes in the comments! :pinkiecrazy:

. . . Flashlight forever.

Okay, if anyone needs me, I'll be in my fallout bunker.

Applejack and Rarity didn’t kiss. What a bad story.

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