Not a brony. No really, I'm not. I'm just here to see what awesome stuff this crazy fandom puts out.
When Celestia first took her crown, she quickly realized that a few ponies were a little too eager to sing her praises.
Naturally, she tried to get them to calm down.
Over a thousand years later, she's still trying.
And then the other alicorns start getting cults of their own...
This is an April Fools Day story with some actual effort put into it.
Teen sex for talk of harems, and by extension, that sex exists.
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Oh, I think I know from where that statue comes from 😁
Good read!
I'm surprised that the Violet Librarians haven't attempted to recruit Starlight Glimmer, after all she is really good at setting up cults. Seriously though this was a bunch of laughs, and It does make me wonder if Opaline has a cult as well.
11544654
This.
11544666
Starlight might just murder them though. Poor magic self-control and all. And Misty is Opaline's cult methinks. Sunny probably has one by now.
11544672
Он Ио, ЯЦИ
11544666
What makes you think she isn't a Violet Librarian? Think about it! She understands the cult mentality, she's always close to Twilight, and she's got an actual grip on reality. She is the absolutely perfect choice to lead the Librarians and keep them in check.
she has to give a 5 hour lecture about STDs to EVERYРONE
I think a fun idea for a continuation of this would be the Mane 6 had their own cults, with the thought process that eventually they'd likely all ascend, via osmosis or something, by absorbing some leftover 'Divineness' from the Elements.
That make sense?
Sadge
11544700
That it upsets you proves it true!
Oh that's a very poor choice of words.
Good for Twilight. This should help cut down on her anxiety-induced bad decisions. Harmony also seemed to have been trying to set her up with a doofy little monkey boy for a while there, and fighting against fate is pretty cool by itself.
11544861
i agree
Flurry Heart is a rouge angle of satin confirmed.
That's vaguely adjacent to what cutie marks are, so... yes.
11544710
It's only murder if you do it on purpose. Now, mareslaughter on the other hand... Well, there's a nonzero chance she's already guilty of that from the time she "banished" Discord (a genuine descriptor of what destroying his physical form accomplishes, admittedly).
11545287
This is Starlight we're talking about. So yes. She would do it on purpose. And since they're cultists, normal ponies would congratulate her probably. Look at Celestia, Luna, and Cadance's cults, and how the princesses view them.
Twilight would of course say something. But still.
Firstly I wonder if she shares her harem with her friends, secondly surprised twlight didnt create a mountain of paperwork that needs to be done in triplet to join her cult
Hehehehhehehehehe. I really want to know what happened with the apples and the oranges, and I am glad twilight was willing to take one for the team.
Unwanted worship always makes for a fun time (well, for outside observers. Most of the time.) I can think of at least one Sunset Shimmer who could empathize all too well and regret that she can't pull a page out of Twilight's playbook. Delightful stuff throughout; thank you for it.
(I wonder if any of Twilight's friends want her to "share the wealth," as it were...)
All that story is just plain perfect.
Praise the sun 🌞 \0/
11544822
.
?
11544828
Would Starlight even want to be part of the cult though?
11544854
Probably helps though. So only the most dedicated stick around for the whole thing, and therefore are part of the harem.
11544895
Wouldn't the ponies be more disturbed by the presence of meat products than by the burning of them? Unless it's a vegetable-based bacon?
Those cultists had better watch out when Flurry hits the terrible twos.
might use the cult Idea for one of my stories
11544828
Ehem. A proper
head of churchcult leader uses cult members for their own nefarious and selfish purposes while pretending to serve their goddess.Yeah she would be a good choice. She would probably be glad to try every stallion. And mare. For the appropriate skills of their chosen role and perhaps others.
Ah, a true craftsmare.
Yeah, sure. I would totally say the same after someone offers me a harem.
Her plan was truly perfect.
11546213
Twice the crime. First the perfectly good pig, then the bacon.
11544672
Obviously they've been trying to breed the perfect suitor case in point shiny
Very enjoyable read! Can't wait to see what you've included in the other chapters.
This story just gets better and better! Loving Nightmare Moon's standards, and her slowly increasing horror with the actions of her followers.
Poor Cadence...it was a good idea. Shame that the ponies she's dealing with are insane. And I do like the fact that Shining Armor is shown to be sane, and knows how crazy his parents are.
Oh, very clever plan on Twilight's part! Looking forward to how things are going to turn out when the fifth princess is born...
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Yes, and I couldn't help being reminded a bit of Past Sins too. It's been A While.
well... technically, she did initiate restoration of the Elements after their previous forms had been shattered by NM, so yeah. "Welder" fits.
This one got a chuckle out of me.
11544854
Honestly, that’d be a pretty effective way of stymieing the harem. Either she kills the mood so thoroughly, not even a necromantic aphrodisiac could bring it back, or she just winds up hosting an in-depth sex-ed class, ushering in a new wave of sexually responsible and aware ponies.
Twiggy for the win.
I'm currently picturing God (the Judeo-Christian one) reading over my shoulder, laughing, and taking notes. I know for a fact He isn't, but given some of the things certain of His "worshipers" think and do, it's fun to imagine.
the fact that this is an aprils fools story is almost a crime because this is sooo goood !! ( granted you did say you put effort into this and it shows but still...april fools kinda drags everything it touches down... )
still I loved every second of this !!
Why do I feel that I should be trying to paraphrase this to fit into FiM?
What would discord Cult this look like?
11549495
Easy! He'd just imply he had a cult and leave it at that.
Okay, now I'm curious: What did happen?
Poor girl...
THIS EXPLAINS TWILIGHT BETTER THAN ANY BIOGRAPHY.
after reading this I'm now curious about one thing: how will sunny starscout react to her own cult when it forms?
I don't know why she even has that other lever...