Your OTP is Trash—Change My Mind
Flurry did not like school. Easily the most boring thing ever invented. Between being as smart as she was and Princess Twilight Sparkle's own niece, she could just breeze through everything anypony else had to "teach" her. So she could spend her lectures doing much more important things. Her notebook was not full of useless notes, but things befitting a princess.
Her professors were so dense too, they didn't seem to realize it at all. At least they were cute—especially in pairs. They were all friends, so there was plenty of compatibility in personality. Even the colors of their coats went well together. Ponies underestimated how important that was. How could you be comfortable with a pony if you didn't look good standing next to them?
And honesty was important because blah blah blah. She was starting to get pretty good at drawing too. One more bow on Applejack's dress, and it was a perfect little wedding scene on her page. She smiled.
When she looked up, Professor Applejack was not smiling, but looming over her with a stern expression. "That's enough. If you're not going to take me seriously, maybe it's time I find somepony who you will. And give me that." She snatched her notebook up, and carried it with her out of the room.
Welp, she was getting detention. The bell rang, and nopony else was going to wait for Applejack to come back. Her classmates all filed out, while she just stayed in her seat. If she was going to the headmare, as she almost certainly was, there was no point in trying to run. She simply sat and awaited her fate.
Sure enough, she soon came back. But not with headmare Starlight. It was with a wicked grin and her mother. "Thank you, I'll talk with her," Cadance said. She walked in and closed the door behind her; Applejack waved as it shut. She sat down next to her, holding Flurry's notebook.
"Mom!? What are you doing here?" Flurry gaped.
"Unlucky for you, I happened to feel like visiting Ponyville today. Now, what is this?" She asked, flatly, with a hint of disappointment.
"Uh, my notebook?" Flurry had enough sass to hold her own with any of the professors, she wasn't prepared for her mom.
"You know what I mean," her mother hissed. She flipped it open. "This is a drawing of Applejack and Rarity getting married! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that is?"
"Do you have any idea how litt—"
"Applejack is obviously meant to be with Fluttershy. I thought I raised you better than this."
Flurry got along with her mother most of the time. But she couldn't let that stand. "She's cuter with Rarity, and besides, Fluttershy's taken."
"She can have more than one special somepony!" Cadance was starting to raise her voice.
Flurry stared her mother down. "She can, but do you think a traditional pony like Applejack is interested in that? Please."
Cadance was standing again, wings flared. "Well you're the crazy one if you think Rarity wants to be stuck on a farm for the rest of her life."
"And I suppose you have a better idea?"
"Twilight. Obviously. It would be everything she ever wanted. And she would make Twily so happy."
Flurry gagged. "Are you serious? You'd put her with Twilight when Rainbow Dash is around? You must be going senile."
"Everypony and their dog has put those two together. Sorry for trying to be original." Cadance rolled her eyes like she was the angsty teenager.
"It's a classic!..."
Applejack stepped back from the door, trying to rub the soreness out of the ear that had been pressed against it. "I can't say that's what I had in mind when I ran into her ma. Don't really know what to think about all that."
Her other friends and a fair few students kept up the eavesdropping for a few moments more. Rarity turned and responded to her. "I agree; I was also hoping for more... chastisement. Though I am not terribly surprised, considering who those two are."
Applejack nodded. then that she realized that the students who had stuck around were all staring at her and Rarity. "What're y'all looking at?"
"You know, Applejack," Rarity said, "it occurs to me that our unruly little princess may have a few decent ideas. How would you like to get dinner sometime?"
"Really, Rarity?"
"Yes, of course. You're not a bad looking mare, you know."
"I... guess—"
There was a loud crash from inside the classroom. The door fell away from the hinges. "I AM THE PRINCESS OF LOVE," Cadance screamed, "I THINK I KNOW MORE ABOUT IT THAN YOU!"
Everycreature trembled before the enraged princess who marched through the door. "What do you think you're doing?"
"I-I just," Rarity stammered.
"We were just gonna get some food," Applejack pleaded.
"Do you think you can fool me?" Cadance sneered. Her body glowed with magic, and the purple of her eyes deepened to near black. "I know a date when I see one! This is not meant to be!"
Applejack and Rarity clung to each other, trembling.
"Yes, do it! Kiss!" Flurry Heart yelled from behind.
Cadance wheeled around to face her daughter. She glowered at her; the air began to hum with magical energy. She reared up, horn crackling. But before her terrible magic could crash down on them, there was a teleport.
Twilight Sparkle appeared in the room, surrounded by four guards. "I got the Nightmare Cadance alarm, what's happening?"
Her arrival restored some calm. "It has come to my attention that my daughter is badly misguided in matters of romance. Some of your teachers as well," Cadance said.
Flurry didn’t have time to listen to whatever explanation her mom gave. Having Twilight there was an opportunity she wasn’t going to waste. Especially considering the commotion her mother was causing. She went back into the classroom and had herself a nice look out the window.
Sure enough, everycreature was evacuating the building—guided by all the faculty not currently being educated in who the loves of their lives were. She smiled as she saw the pony she was looking for, everything was coming together.
Twilight blinked. "—Well, uh, congratulations. But is that it? You went and covered yourself in dark magic just because they're going on a date?"
"It is not 'just' a date! It is a grave error!"
"I have an important question," Flurry butted in. With a flourish that conveyed extreme smugness is the ancient horn-signs of Unicornia, she teleported Rainbow Dash into the room from outside, and held her in the air next to Twilight. Likewise, she picked up Rarity and held her on the other side.
“Do you love her,” she gestured with Rarity, “or her,” doing the same with Rainbow. Both mares glared at her throughout the whole process.
“Answer carefully,” Cadence said. The words were directed toward Twilight, but Flurry felt her mother staring at her.
“I love them both? They’re two of my best friends? Wha—oh, wait. Date?”
Flurry knew full well what Twilight had been through and accomplished. But she was still so adorably naïve.
Twilight looked between Rainbow and Rarity (and dispelled Flurry’s hold on them while she was at it). “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel that way about either of them. I have a coltfriend.”
Flurry narrowed her eyes. “‘Coltfriend’… You say that like you’re not a lesbian.”
Twilight stared at her. “But I’m not? What are you—”
"Who is he?" Cadance barked. Flurry's jaw tightened as well.
"He's right here," she pointed at one of her guards.
Said guard removed his helmet. "Flash Sentry, your Highness." He held out his hoof for a shake.
Flurry turned to her mother. "Truce?"
"Truce," Cadance replied. They both lunged at Flash Sentry, horns blazing with magical fire.
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Poor Flash Sentry
sir, it's elementary
For who else
Faces such belts
Of anger and hatred fury
I love the whole ordeal between the Shippers of Equestria.
Your OTP is trash though,
change my mind
I dont think i've ever seen anyone ship Applejack with Fluttershy, therefore, your otp is trash Cadance. Also, why must all of the main six be lesbian? Not that i have anything wrong with that, its just... why? Also, you forgot to ship pinkie in this fic.
My otp list:
Fluttercord
Cheesy pie
Startrix
bumblebeewrong showSoarindash
Plus a few more that i cant think of at the moment
Poor Flash.
Poor Flash lol
9823464
Startrix and Fluttercord are canon, therefore otp. CheesePie is perfect as well. But the only pony Rainbow Dash belongs with is Twilight.
9823801
Nein
Sillier than I expected, but a fun ride!
Pretty sure there's a typo...
"the lives of their lives were" I think should be "loves of their lives"
Cute, and also Rarijack is best ship!
9823464
9823801
howdy, author
what drugs are you on?
cuz whatever the fuck it is, it's gone real bad
the grand finale of mlp proves StarBurst is real, not to mention fluttercord is just a shitty meme pushed by fluttershy haters
9824206
and you're wrong too
sparity best ship
Got to side with flurry heart here with regards to rarijack, though raritwi (as done with the weary travelers) is also pretty good.
9824449
The fuck does spitfire have in common with rarity you crazy person it would never work.
More like DISPARITY.
That seems off...
#FIFY
9823801
TwiDash and RariDash fight I'm my heart, but mono made me live RariTwy too.
Absolutely hilarious story though, I hope AJ and Rarity get happy together
9824543
SPike and rARITY, you troglodyte
9824449
The grand finale he might not have watched yet, because it's still weeks away on the official schedule? (That said, yeah, I feel Starburst and Sparity are written poorly in canon but canon nonetheless)
Also, I still don't get how people associate Fluttercord with hating Fluttershy, given that it's the easiest way to make her immortal short of the lazy way of "they're all alicorns now". Seriously, natural lifespan isn't even the issue with "Twilight will not outlive her friends" because Rainbow Dash. Also, if you've ever seen nature in action you'd know why Fluttercord works.
Good heavens the amount of comments so far with negative feedback. Shippers be crazy.
Well, you've already earned my approval.
But... how'd she do in processing and handling?
The only ending Flash Sentry deserves.
9824872
Right LOL
Sacrificed like a pawn in a game of chess :I
~ ps. the solution is obvious... FF can't work ... but FFF is the way to go!!!
short, sweet, and by golly highly enjoyable.
i expected flow charts made of magic, but a note book is hella cute.
and BTW: canonically they have slept with each other.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/9/7/91784.png
Why would you put an alarm for a ruler of nation in your school?
9825417
Because Twilight is third in line to the throne (behind Celestia & Luna)
Flutterdash is best ship!
Huh. Look at all these wrong opinions in the comments. The only OTP is Rainbow Dash × Kitchen Sink. Everybody knows that!
9824206
Yall are wrong twirare is best ship!!!
9824588
YES, r/Enchanted Library gud
9824659
No u, REEEEEEE!!!
Wow the explosions happening down here. Might as well add some others to it.
Luna x Discord
Applejack x Celestia
Twilight x Cheerilee
Rarity x Rainbow
Poor flash :(
This story was a delightful little romp of amusing confusion all held together nicely with a bit of Flash Sentry bashing at the end. Good one.
Very wise to install this.
To stir even more discussions here:
AppleDash!
*runs away*
This is scary accurate to two shippers arguing. Even down to the eventual mutual hatred of Flash.
There's so many downvotes in the comments!
. . . Flashlight forever.
Okay, if anyone needs me, I'll be in my fallout bunker.
Applejack and Rarity didn’t kiss. What a bad story.
The omniship is the only way we will ever find a way to end this war.
Change my mind
FYI, they're reading this at Ciderfest's Bad Fanfiction.
9919943
Neat
There was no other way this could have ended better. Good to see a Mother and Daughter bonding against the evil's of Flash Sentry ships as nature intended it.
This is, quite literally, the fandom and shipping.
As a FlashLight and RariJack shipper, I laughed through this whole thing. Nightmare Cadance alarm was just too perfect as well.
Nice to see Cadance and Flurry agreeing on something for a change! :P