• Member Since 26th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen January 22nd

Aegis Shield


Also known as "TtheWriter" on youtube, if you're into Dungeons and Dragons stuff. :3

T

Celestia has a dangerous creature held in the deepest of Canterlot's high-security dungeons. It can create ponies (with full backgrounds and histories) with it's strange and often-times prophetic powers. The Princess does her best to keep it under wraps, but its only a matter of time before it's "creativity" will get out of control.

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 836 )

Holy shite! You're back! :derpyderp1:

this is a great start to this story. i have high hopes for it. Hope to see more soon.

Whooooohoooooo! New Aegis story! :pinkiegasp:

It could do with some tags though, if that's ok :yay:

5703873 Seriously. Unless of course that would lead to spoilers, in which case, please explain that in the summary. :rainbowderp:

This is very similar in premise to Machinations In The Dark, but I enjoyed what I read so I'll stick around for your rendition of the story.

Have not read it yet, but just by the description it sounds like BaryonBrony's Machinations in the Dark.
Fan of your other stuff so hoping this is just as good as the others.

... well played, prophet. Well played. After all: “To know the future is to change it.”

So, let me guess, it's a human, a brony, that watched the entire show, but somehow got transported to Equestria to the time before the actual show started and now he knows everything that will happen up until the end of Season 4?

Whether I'm right or wrong, it's still an interesting concept. And hey, I'm always excited to read a story from Aegis Shield :D.

This is a good story, but it feels very reminiscent of Machinations in the Dark by Baryon Brony, though Celestia in this universe seems a lot more reasonable with the prisoner. Your stories are usually very good, so I'll still follow this story and see where you take it.

5703892 It reads very similarly as well. I'm skeptical of shenanigans at this point. I don't think Aegis meant to do anything, but it is...odd.

5704134 Doubly so because of the no tags.....

5704140 I actually didn't catch that. :applejackunsure:

There's an immortal, magic-proof fan of the show in that cage. Might be the author.

Gonna spoiler it, because I think I might be right. I'm pretty sure it's Laura Lauren Faust.

The person has red hair, access to art supplies (Which would have been one of the first things she'd have asked for), and "You wouldn’t even have a sister if I’d had my way. You’d have been Queen Celestia!” Laura mentioned at some point that she had wanted Luna to be a throwaway character, and for Celestia to be a Queen and the sole ruler. It was Hasbro that told her to go with Princess, and the popularity of Luna got her screen time and relevance.

And who better to know the lore, history and future of Equestria?

You could say Celestia's making deals with the devil. There was another name for those... Oh, what was that old doctor's name again?
Consider my disbelief suspended... Over a precarious drop.
Am I an old man now? How do these people not recognize the prisoner?

Wow, someone's been reading Baryon Brony's stuff.

Comment posted by Aegis Shield deleted Mar 6th, 2015

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I've not actually ever heard of or read this story everyone is referencing, but I don't think anyone would believe me if I denied it so meh. There are plenty of stories that share similiar themes in fan fiction. This is just my take on this sort of story, I suppose.

5704552 No you don't understand, you're writing a story where there is a HUMAN in Equestria! That has already been done before! You won't get away with this!

5704552 it's not even that. just on reading the description for both stories, your stories description reads like a summary of Machinations in the Dark's description. Seriously. Not even trying to start anything, go take a read on that description and read yours again. It's really eerie.

5704552

I like the feel of this a little better than Machinations. I'll admit, I thought this was a retread, but there's absolutely nothing wrong with re-visioning a fic. Done it myself. That said, I believe this is a case of polygenesis. I know another author working on a similar story, who has also not read Machinations. I'm not sure why, but it seems this idea got planted in the minds of several authors all at once.

I like how Celestia is feeling so far, I like the human. The petting thing made me giggle, right balance of dark ad silly.

Look forward to the next chapter.

5703978
Or a writer.
"If it was up to me, you'd have been Queen Celestia!"

5704344 Bloody brilliant.

~Crystalline Electrostatic~

*whistles* Featured on first day.

Been done before dude, this doesn't belong.

5704727 huh, makes sense. Though there are some bronies who think that way too...

Wait....

... the red-maned monster laughed at her...

Red-maned... Knows what will happen... Queen Celestia... Is that f*cking Lauren Faust sitting in the dungeons??? :pinkiegasp:

This premise sounds ludicrously similar to Machinations in the Dark.

I really have trouble judging this story by itself because I keep comparing it to Machinations...:applejackunsure:

Tulip #31 · Mar 6th, 2015 · · 14 · Prophet ·

Sarcasm of this story leaks through my laptop. Its pretty bad-written. I supppose you just trying to go into shape for new achievements, i hope so...

Moar moar, I demand it!

So, how do the guards open the cell to feed/interact with the prisoner if they need Celestia's crown to do so? They just constantly borrowing that thing, or what.

And I see you being a jerk, Lt. Flash Sentry.

That was how they’d captured it, it couldn’t walk across a gravel road without injuring itself!

Why do they even need a cell door? Just throw some of these down in the hallway:
dickgraybeal.com/i/991155%20intermediate%20trans%20stat.JPG
It's super effective!

Anyway, good start; while similar to that other story, I already see improvements. The first being Celestia isn't a total bitch like she was in Machinations In The Dark, spitting hatred and borderline throwing tantrums. Another bonus is that your human, while probably still going to be a kind of annoying villian, isn't overpowered. Machinations' human had an aura of corruption/rot, rapid healing, super speed, and musical mind-control powers (probably more too).

Now, hopefully, this person won't be walking a contradiction like the other guy. Seriously, in Machinations In The Dark, the sapien, as it's called (pfft), tries to say it's not evil after mutilating a bunch of guards, and bringing Sombra back to life because he apparently owes him (This is like saying someone would have been in the right saving Hitler if they owed the bastard).

Well, good luck and I hope you update soon. It's very hard to tell if this story is going to be any good yet, after all.

Edit
All above predictions are wrong. This story is going in a near complelty different direction than MiD. Conclusion: Coincidence.

Brilliant.
I like how totally not lauren faust acts towards the princess.

5705152 quick the elements of harmony
*insane rainbow light show splitting of human like a prism*
"so was that supposed to do anything ?, anyway twilight would you and fluttershy like to hear how In one future you actions killed and mutilated ponies against your will and helped destroy the whole of equestrian? or how every pony is terrified of you pinkie pie even after your long reduced to a skeleton ?" (fallout equestira!)

Sentry, eh? Red herring, relative, or real deal?

I shall be watching. I love this. You have something here, and every new word is:

courseware.codeschool.com/images/blog/mind-blown.gif

Right. So it's Faust, then?

Whelp. This just got very interesting. Pretty obvious who she is now.

...You. Have. FREAKING. GOD. IN. YOUR. DUNGEON.

ARE YOU SUICIDAL?!??!?! You have the creator of the g4 universe, in your dungeon, Celestia! THAT'S BEYOND STUPID!

Oh it's going to bite her in the ass in the end.

Wow... Celestia has imprisoned her Creator. That's pretty heavy.

i am liking this more than Machinations In The Dark as it seems a little more believable in that the human does not have as massive of powers, and Celestia at least seems to be more in character with the show. i look forward to this updating, and to see how the story progresses.

Oh, how interesting. Either you put Faust into the story or the author. :pinkiehappy:

So she has Faust imprisoned down there. Kinda messed up, like locking your own mother away for being who they are... :pinkiesad2:

So, Lauren Faust has somehow ended up in Equestria, and is able to create life as she wants it. No wonder the princess fears her. Having uncanny knowledge of their lives and being able to make life out of nothing is some crazy powers. It does make me wonder how this all started. Did she meet Celestia, and during their conversation she maybe created and then unmade a pony infront of her, thus causing Celestia to throw her into jail out of fear? Then again, Celestia is trying to make Lauren's stay as pleasant as possible. But, as we know it, a golden cage is still a cage.

Anyway, this is a story that I am going to be following. Will be interesting to see where you are taking this.

Author, you flooded my room.

Well... The ability to create ponies with histories and probably family... I guess Lauren is even more powerful than the other guy. This raises a whole lot of questions, such as why Lauren is still caught. Plot convenience, obviously, but why not just make a Mary Sue alicorn whose sole purpose is to break her out of jail? Or really a million other ways she can pull it off with that power. She's like that doofus, Lord Second; the power to do anything, except win without a fight because that would be boring.

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