A Thief with a heart of a substance better left unsaid wakes up in Equestria after a unlucky turn of events. How will a jaded, world weary human get along with cheery, naive Ponies?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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no max is not allowed to have good days.
this quote makes me warm and fuzzy inside.
thanks for another chapter
Schizoprenia, she Could have at least a dozen diferent voices in there, i like it.
One thanks for uploading the last chapter on my birthday, much appreciated.
Two: the thing with Twilight? That's scary, mental illness becoming a thing. Though I wouldn't mind learning more about the illness. But, I also feel like it was a bit 'too' sudden. I'm wondering why you added this in so late in the game.
Not trying to flog a dead horse here but, thanks for the wonderful chapter.
I’m a few chapters in and I dunno man...like I WANT to like it but something about this main character is just grating and painful to read. Everything is a one liner or a pun or he’s makin a pass at someone, like I get it’s got a comedy tag and that he’s supposed to be the “rude crude outlaw dude whose too cool for school” and all but it’s like...WAAAAYYY over the top. Almost to the point where his character doesn’t even HAVE any character, just one joke or pun cascading into the next into the next so on and so forth. It’s like he’s how someone would imagine somebody whose cool, slick, charming and witty would act after watching snatch and lock stock back to back. I think I saw another comment that kinda summed it up, the dialogue is just unrealistic and unbelievable. Like he’s not fazed by anything at all but always just has a one liner ready and his jokes just kind of overshadow what’s going on in the story itself. Sorry, more like a rant than a comment. The story’s not TERRIBLE or anything so far...this character just bugs...it’s too much. I dunno maybe I just haven’t read enough into it. Maybe it’s too early for me to jump to conclusions. It can’t ALL be like this...can it? It def got a “like” from me though and I’m still going to keep reading. I DO like long stories and all. And with cautious optimism I shall continue!
8767437
speak for yourself. while it's been a quite some time since reading the earlier chapters, i know for a fact that max speaks in a very similar fashion to people i know.
one of said people is also rarely phased by anything ever, along with a one-liner perpetually on hand. sure it's kinda grating, but i wouldn't call it over the top, maybe i'm just used to it. although, that's just my opinion so feel free to disagree.
8767437
I'd like to disagree with you, but it's your interpretation. I've literally just set my sights on making a character that isn't phased by anything due to extenuating circumstances because I felt like Max was too emotionally charged in doing everything he set out to do, but like I said, it's your opinion. Don't let me get discredit you or anything.
As for the constant quips and one-liners; that's how my Dad and his friends talk. That's what I've been raised around my entire life. Mix the quips in with a decent lexicon and an easy going attitude and you have a pretty good clone of a lot of my own friends and relatives. Well, the large vocabulary would have to come from me, but you know what I'm trying to say. To me, Max, Applejack, and Noir are the most realistic personality-wise because I know people like them, though I'm hoping that you're just on an early chapter that I haven't rewritten, or maybe there are some things I can explain if you care to inquire.
8762296
I wrote out a paragraph for this and refreshed the page without thinking about it, but to be honest with you, I was supposed to introduce Twilight's schizophrenia immediately after Esteril via Max catching whispers in her dreamscape, but nothing ever came of it and I decided to hold it for a later chapter.
Then I put it off forever and dumbed a little when I thought A Thief's Tale was going to hit a hundred chapters.
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