A Thief with a heart of a substance better left unsaid wakes up in Equestria after a unlucky turn of events. How will a jaded, world weary human get along with cheery, naive Ponies?
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I just get finished reading the new Diaries of a Madman chapter, and now this updates?! My God, it's 5am ffs, now I gotta spend the rest of the night reading this. ;-; y u do dis
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If it makes you feel any better, I'm in the middle of a shift change right now. Life sucks, but at least you get to read some dope shit, right?
Holy shit... That was heavy. Great chapter and all, but how do you deal with this kind of stuff? Unless you can just live with it without a care, you are not escaping that can of worms.
I like going straight to looking at comments after edits. Thanks for lettin me, buddyo
Jesus Christ. I can't even make any jokes, that was just dark and fucked
Holy fuck, can this fic get any darker?
No wai-
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Stay tuned to find out what happens on the next episode of Dergun Baw Zed
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It's fun to see how people react when you're one of the first people to see a chapter. So far, I'm actually mildly surprised. I didn't really consider just how fucking dark this chapter was.
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You know what smells worse than a burning tire? A burning child. Never gets out of your clothes, no matter how many times you wash.
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Depending on what you call dark, it gets worse.
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Lucky for you Im a Masochist, so bring it on
I had to go and read last three chapters (including this one). Now I will have to wait to see what shit will come on his ( I mean Maximus) head. And yes, it was pretty dark, and it can be even more dark from now on. Imagine things similar to this that he have to do, or have to see someone doing so without being able to do anything. And not just 7 children. No. What about 20? 50? Or, even better, couple hundred, if not thousands? THAT would be heavy as fuck.
Anyway, thanks for all of the good work. Keep it up.
Ok, I got to say this because I'm a little annoyed about what happened in this chapter. Max became remorseful because of his actions. He feels like the worst scum in the world because of his choices. And the way he justifies them at first is that he had no choice but to take the extreme option. That's bullshit. He has the power to do virtually anything. Yet his first response to a situation was to, and this is a spoiler BTW, Kill the King of Mexicolt when he threatened him. And, yes, that was a threat. He may not have said it directly but it was still heavily implied. Then, he destroys an entire fucking city because he believes that there are no innocents there.
You cannot say you are a leader looking for allies in a war when you threaten those same allies. If the king betrayed him then, yeah, kill the douche for breaking his word. But the King only threatened to join Discord because Max promised him harm if he betrayed him. You never give out threats in a tense situation like negotiations. Hell, I bet Discord told the king that Equestria will try to strong arm him into joining them. Which is what Maz did. Also, Crimson told him to think about his actions before he glassed the area. He specifically said that there might be innocents there, but Max basically said: "Oh well, sucks for them." As far as I'm concerned, you can't whine about the choices you made when you clearly made them in the right frame of mind. Keep in mind that his Prince mode is supposed to be his diplomatic and logical side. I did not see any logic or reason in his choices.
With the power he has, no one should die if they are not directly trying to kill him. He could've erased the threat from the Kings mind like he did the captain and redo the entire conversation. This would've, again, be taking the Celestia approach in handling affairs. But at least the guy would be alive even if he was a poor leader. Max chose violence because it was the quick and easy solution. If he wants to be better for Twilight then Be! Better! For! Twilight! Explore every option because you always have other options. There is never just one and violence should always be a last resort. The hardest path is the one with the best reward.
I might be a little harsh here, and I know that Max still hasn't truly mastered this power. But he is not an idiot. And he can still do a lot at his current level. So if he doesn't want to continue to dirty his soul then he needs to start looking at the minor details as well as the bigger picture. That way horrible mistakes like MExicolt won't happen again.
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To explain Max's train of thought since I did a frankly awful job of doing so in the story, I'll begin with the biggest thing: Why did Max simply choose to practically nuke Esteril? He chose Sunfire because it was fast, effective, and he knew it would get the job done. Max ignored the estimated body count because he made the same mistake he made on Earth, though for a different reason. He knew first hand that Earth was tumultuous, so he used his most powerful magic to solve the problem. In Esteril, Max was so focused on using his greatest strength that he didn't consider that he could borrow Noir's Dark Magic, have Celestia come in and mass wipe minds, use Luna to give the citizens nightmares until they straightened up: pretty much anything.
Think back to the morning of the destruction of Esteril. Max went into the town,
looked around, never entered a building. He meandered about and erected an obelsik before going back to camp to watch the sun rise. He noted movement, but mentioned it no further. The main reason I'm bringing this up won't even be present for a few more chapters, but it's a terribly important detail.
As for why Prince Mode didn't reroute Max to a different path, it's because Max logically thought that the most permanent solution to dealing with La Canalla was by just getting rid of it. Prince Mode isn't like being on NTC (Limitless): It's a change in demeanor and diction, not personality or thought process. It doesn't present Max with any more options than he would think of normally.
There were a lot of paths that Max could have gone down, many alternative choices could've been made and many lives could have been saved. I wrote this chapter with a plan, man, and as of Chapter Fifty-Five, all readers of A Thief's Tale will understand why things are going the way they are.
To address Corona Rey and the circumstances surrounding that affair, Have you ever seen how Max talks to Royalty? Corona Rey was the wrong dude to pull that shit with, granted, but Max wouldn't be who he is without stepping on someone's toes. Max wanted it made clear that he wasn't going to do something for nothing and that there would be repercussions if Corona's end of the bargain wasn't held up. Was it foolish? Yes. Dude has his moments, but pride and stupidity each showed their hand on both sides. The point of it was to show that Royalty outside of the Royal Family tend to be more prideful and less attentive to who exactly outranks their power level.
I can't stop thinking about the part where max reached in that guys back and pulled his spine
Gives me the shivers
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Yeah, I can see it. Child murder is fucked up, but I liked this. Not in the weird way, but in the story elements way
Me thinks that you missed a 'not' in there somewhere. XP
Take it easy guy.
I honestly expected Max to just steal a legitimate nuke to use on the city, though sun fire achieves the same effect quite nicely. I'm surprised that he didn't think to steal the concept of wrongdoing/lawbreaking from everyone in the city in a kind of blanket hit, but it was a good chapter nonetheless.
ffs i picked a bad time to be illiterate i had to reread this 1 sentence 5 times cause i felt something was off with it only to realize i been reading as ---The two days Twilight and I had together flew by faster than I would have liked. I still trained with my team, got our morning runs done, and attended Twilight’s wedding,--- i feel like such a dumass lol
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Wish you would've started with the rewrites, but oh whale
I have a question, can he use his shadow teleport and mind control with Sombra’s power ? Also can he pull a gun or something from his powers ?