A Thief with a heart of a substance better left unsaid wakes up in Equestria after a unlucky turn of events. How will a jaded, world weary human get along with cheery, naive Ponies?
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Will he be able to get back to Equis?
8211320
It is only a question of when
At first, the censored text in your AN made me nervous; I knew something bad was coming. Now? Now, I have something even more to be further hyped about. If I wasn't recovering from a stroke, I'm sure I'd have come up with a better way to phrase it, something more to describe just what I loved, and exactly what I'm predicting in flourish, but I just don't have it in me right now. In any case, your work has certainly been helpful in pointing out parts missing (which was inevitably to be a result, I suppose, what with neurons being theoretically damaged or destroyed).
8211972 Holy shit, man. I hope you make a full recovery sooner rather than later. I'll admit that I've missed your input on the story for some time now. Really, I truly hope your health improves.
I started reading the story and now the next chapter button is gone, I need that button back. That aside I really enjoy this story and it really should have more views and upvotes than it does.
8211980
I thank you for your concern and well wishes; I'm most certainly making certain I know where the damage lays, so I can correct it. With the best of luck, I should be mostly recovered, provided I don't get another (fucking blood clots). Soon enough, I should be able to provide near the same quality commentary, and continue my own projects (I've got a few stories: a crossover, a power lottery, a Displaced, and a, more or less, original story of my own).
... another update well lets see how many words.... 34K..... didnt i just read the last chapter like a few mins ago?
how do you do dis you post so fast in huge amount of words.
I just can’t keep up sometimes heh
8211972
Shit man, I hope you make a complete recovery and not have to experience that bullshit again. I remember you always commenting before and then, silence. I’m pretty sure I saw that you also comment on A Journey Beyond Sanity and then nothing as well. It’s pretty hard to miss commenters that actually give some insightful feedback.
Major spoilers for chapter 38 ahead, read at your own risk.
The sex scene with Noir? Top notch, I thoroughly enjoyed that. Had a stupid grin on my face when it happened, but one thing I had a problem with is that you mentioned something fucked will happen (especially when I thought that Maxwell was Kaid and you mentioned in the A/N that he was still alive, so I assumed the worst and thought that Kaid almost died) so it kinda made me tense throughout the chapter even though I knew I had nothing to worry about until at least the halfway point of the chapter. I was just searching for clues as to what will happen and it kinda made it a bit difficult to read at times when the situation was to leaned back for my tastes.
It started with Max getting an odd feeling at town hall then Kaid ignoring a note that came when he was going to sleep on his birthday. These little things really made me jump, no offense to your writing, but after the few messages you left about this chapter, I couldn't help it. I am kinda disappointed though, I expected something seriously fucked to happen. But nah, Kaid just came to earth, sure Kaid's 'speech' to the bug queen was
a bitevil, but would that really offend people? I don't think the people that read your stories are this soft.I'm really worried about what will happen to Kaid's and Twilight's relationship. Already, Kaid has been gone for weeks, how much can Twilight take without a full explanation? From the looks of things, Kaid is going to be stuck on earth for a while and there's no telling how long that will be on Equus. Noir already pointed out what Kaid did makes it look like he was using Twilight to do evil shit and that's not sitting right with me. People--or ponies in this case--generally don't like to be used so having something like that on your mind for a while *eye roll* can really mess things up. You really know how to set up a cliff hanger, don't you? Well, I'll just have to wait until the next chapter.
I think the bug queen should tone down a bit. I'm all in when it comes to making people feel like shit, that's always fun, but Chrysalis is wording thing to make them angry as shit. Kaid is right, death to the changelings, well not all the changelings just the bug Queen Chrysalis. Maybe I won't have to worry about that since if she does piss off enough people that will come naturally.
"I was seven shades of thrilled." God, I love some of these lines.
I'm just waiting for rat bastard to come along and see what Kaid does to him. I know it's bound to happen so that's going to be interesting reading.
Does Noir know about God now? or is he still blocking her out, it would be pretty cool if Noir has to keep the same secret that Kaid does.
PS: I don't really know what to call Max/Kaid in my comments. If he's going to be called Kaid while on earth I'm going to stay with Kaid, plus I think that would be pretty cool.
Wonderful chapter, really had me on the edge of my seat the whole time.
8213671
Vik’s input has been sorely missed
8213675
In fairness, Max was awfully busy being fucking staggered that his brother wasn’t dead and Maxwell never quite believed that Kaid had really died
Speaking of Kaid’s speech to Chrysalis, this is only chapter 38. The blog post was for 39.
I’d like to build my Chrysalis to be an antagonistic, hateful, sadistic cunt above any other cunt. Sure, Elfriede had a bitchy sadistic streak in her, but she was cool about it. That’s just how she be. Chrysalis is a cunt to people, no matter what they’ve done for her.
The Noir thing Gets clarified in the next chapter. Earth has different laws that Equus, after all.
I would suggest keeping ‘Max’ as ‘Kaid’ as long as you refer to ‘Will’ as ‘Maxwell’. I changed the names around so things would be a bit less confusing
8213785
I thought the blog was for 38 but now I see that it's for 39. So i needlessly worried, shit now I'm going to be the same for 39.
I am going to be a mess for chapter 39. The cliffhanger was enough to excite me for 39 and now the blog is making me nervous. The emotions are not mixing well, but damn it if I'm not seven shades of thrilled for the next chapter.
Well at least now there is not going to be a dull moment with Chrissy.
8213671
Well, for sake of providing commentary that is appreciated, I'll be certain to double down on my linguistic retraining, if only to feel accomplished by receiving satisfied replies, witty retorts, and/or an engaging debate; there is precious little that gives me as much of a rush as witnessing, and engaging, in stimulating thought, especially when it being discussed aloud.
8213994
Well said and well put together. Good to have you back, I enjoy not only the stories I read but also the comments. After all, comments are just little stories that add more flavor to the main event.
8213896
Only 2 more days until chapter 39 drops, so hold on until then
"Looks like Maxwell isn't dead though, so that's cool."
Excuse me son, but can you not spoil your own story? Hmph
<3
8328741
The spoiler thing stopped working for A/N when the site changed over to the new look
Not bad, boss man. I'm diggin the Earthy stuff
Quick edit: I swear to god if you make the "War" between Equestria and Earth I'm punching you in the dick
Nice chapter, a lil shame for Luna and Fleur because I like both of them, but I guess it make sense for Twi to be threaten by them.