Each of the Bearers of Harmony came to that first Grand Galloping Gala with a dream in her heart and dreadfully few relevant facts in her mind. Rarity dreamt of finding her Prince Charming. She knew his name, appearance, and not much else.

But in this timeline, one of her friends has her back.

Anonymous, asshole extraordinaire and a rotten egg by all accounts, has fallen on good times after being made a commander of the Storm King's vast armies. With the King's forces and equipment at his fingers, he's found great success conquering nations, sowing chaos, and kicking the asses of all walks of life. All while having a rip-roaring great time doing it.
But the day of the Storm King's biggest conquest to date - the nation of Equestria - looms just around the corner. All that's left now is the final few preparations for the invasion: loose ends to tie up, new weapons to seize, and even some co-commanders to annoy to no end. And once those are complete, Anon will be the first in line to take Equestria as his next conquest.
God help us all.

This isn't the first horse story I've written, but it is the first one that is prose instead of greentext. And I'm still a bit rusty on top of all that. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated!

Anon has been in Equestria for 5 years, working under Celestia as a Minister of Foreign Affairs. His tactics were seen as dishonest at best and unethical at worst. But when Celestia leaves suddenly, she names Anon as her temporary replacement to the throne. With internal bickering over whether Anon deserves this position and heightened tension with the Griffons, Anon must choose carefully. Will he become a tyrant or a fair king? And how far will he go to preserve Equestria?

A fully rewritten version of a greentext I wrote back in 2019. Could be a bit dated with tropes that I thought was good writing at the time, but I’m still proud of it.

For the Second Person tag you should note that sections from Anons POV are in first person, everyone else is in second person.

Romance tag is there because of a romance I included that I think was poorly handled, but half the story wouldn’t make sense if I just removed it so I had to keep it in.

Gore and Violence are self explanatory. It’s not there abundantly, but it is there.

Also don’t read the comments if you don’t want spoilers. Story discussion happens in them and that might ruin the reading experience.

Now on The Good HIE List!

Featured on 1/11/23! Thank you all.
Featured on 1/12/23. Thanks again.
Featured on 1/13/23! Three days in a row? Thanks guys.
Featured on 1/14/23. Four days in a row. Thanks guys, I’m touched.
Featured on 1/15/23. Five days? Holy shit I never expected this guys. Thank you all so much.
Featured on 1/16/23. This makes me wonder if there’s a limit to how many times I can announce a featured slot.
Featured on 2/2/23. Also marks the day I officially finished the story, so hooray.

Sir Anon and Celestia have a talk about the largest, bloodiest war in equestrian history. A war so horrible, so terrible, that hundreds had their lives taken.

Short little rewrite of another old greentext of mine. Was a oneshot from a writing thread. Rewritten from the ground up, using the old story as a skeleton, with the rewrite adding the meat.

(that sounds weird)

Featured on 1/12/23! Thank you all.

The age of chaos has come to an end. The Avatar of Chaos, Discord, has been defeated by the valiant actions of the newly-minted alicorn sisters. Their courageous victory has earned them the adoration of their hometown of Evergreen, and they now seek to unite all of ponykind under their banner.

In the disconnected world left in the wake of Discord's reign however, theirs is not the only story to be told. Not all of them even start in their world, for that matter.

Geralt is a unassuming man living a comfortable but mundane existence. While not dissatisfied with his own life, he has always dreamed of what it would be like to make more of himself. To be able to live a life of adventure and glory, to steer the wheels of history.

Fate has smiled upon on him and granted him the opportunity to do so when he is swept away by a chaotic winter storm across worlds, finding himself in a new feathery body. He soon finds himself taking the first steps and rising above anywhere he thought he could reach as he defends his new home, and begins to build a shining beacon of prosperity that will resound throughout the ages.

But victory comes only to the prepared, and the road to his dreams will be long and hard. It is world filled with all manner of mysteries, monsters, and rivalries. A world where a land is kept safe by the armies that it fields. And so Geralt will resolve to stand tall, to defend his lands and his people, and to see his banner flying forevermore.

After several jumps go wrong, Anon lands himself, er, herself into another land of colorful equines. This time stuck for an entire year before being able to continue on her quest of returning home.

Question remains, will Anon want to?

Proofread and edited by PseudoBob Delightus and Discombobulated Soul

Starts shortly before season one. More character tags will be added as they become relevant.
Includes a grumpy former human.
Dark tag for flashbacks.
Violence tag for flashbacks, mentions of past violence and the second chapter and tenth chapter
Will there be cake?
Maybe?
Maybe includes cake.

A nice Yakutian stallion visits the nice, friendly lands of Equestria for a diplomatic visit. Despite being toted around as a land of Friendship and happiness, all of the mares keep bothering and or attacking him? What gives? Did he do something wrong? Was it a culture thing?

Well, Snowball, even with a security detail assigned to him, he'll have to learn why. As for the mares of Equestria, they'll be taught a very valuable lesson... By Snowball of all ponies. Will he and his arctic coat survive Equestria? Who knows?

RGRE Equestria with a Yakutian from a not RGRE culture based around Anui/Innuit/Yakut culture

A lot of influence from "The Long and Short of It" by SQA with his permission

A group of pony radicals try to summon a demon to overthrow the princesses. Instead they got a human. They don't know what a human is.

((Pre Princess Twilight))

((Edit: Featured 5/11/2020. Didn't expect this to go over so well!))
((Edit2: Ch.8 featured 10/1/2020))
((Edit3: Featured 10/22/2020))
((Final Edit: Featured 3/25/2021))

I got dragged to Equestria by pure accident due to an experiment gone 'wrong', roughly forty years before Nightmare Moons' arrival.
No matter what I do, as a pony-changeling hybrid, something will change with Equestria. I just hope I don't doom the country before Nightmare Moon even arrives... Or worse.

This is the first story I ever tried to write professionally, so there WILL be errors, for that, I apologize in advance.
I'm editing and proofreading it on my own because I literally suck when it comes to using this site competently.
Lastly, I am a slow writer due to IRL getting in the way but I will try my hardest to settle the story down whether it's popular or not.

Fair warning, there may be spoilers in the comments.

Thank you to Little Tigress for the fantastic cover art.

I don't know what I am, but I know where I am. Equestria, magical cartoon utopia. A place that's basically a dream come true.

So why is the only thing I care about finding another drink?

Art by ExoticEon

Featured June 4, 2021. Thanks y'all!
Again on June 17!
Also August 17
And August 26
And October 17
And so on and so forth.