//------------------------------// // Chapter 6 // Story: You're a demon (Apparently) // by Turtwig-Tales //------------------------------// You dreamt of starlight. Were they the stars from here? Or were they the ones you knew back home? Were they the same stars? Did it matter? Probably not. It was a dream you’d had before. It mostly appeared when you felt lonely or helpless. When you just wanted to get away from everything, even for only a little bit. Usually you didn’t even have a physical body here, you simply…were. It felt comforting, floating amongst the silvery pinpricks of light. Nothing could hurt you here, nothing would bother you. Here, at least, you were in complete control. You notice a slight shift in the ‘air,’ or whatever dreams/space had that could shift. A multitude of stars coalesced ahead of you, forming a path of starlight that was solid under the feet you just noticed you had. Something was different. Off. Wrong. It felt like…someone else was here…? But that was impossible, even in Ponyland… Right…? The path ahead seemed to stretch on forever, and behind you was no different. “Well, nothing better to do.” You sigh to no one in particular, and set off down the trail. Eventually you’d wake up and probably forget you even had this dream to start with. So why not do something new with it? It was hard to tell how long you’d been walking. Dreams were rarely good at conveying the passage of time. A minute awake could be minute in-dream, or maybe hours. It felt like hours. You weren’t getting tired, just bored. That was new feeling, being bored in your own dream. There was also the profound feeling that you were more ‘awake’ than you’d ever been while dreaming. What was the term, ‘lucid?’ Is that what you were doing? Unnervingly, with increasing frequency, you had the feeling you were being watched. No matter how hard you looked, you couldn’t find the source. It was as if every mote of light was another eye, watching you. Judging you. Why? WHY?? WHY WON’T THEY JUST LEAVE YOU ALONE??? YOU DIDN’T DO ANYTHING! The full weight of your situation came crashing down on you all at once. Dragged across time and space into a completely alien world against your will, all because some complete dumbass fucked up. Since then you’d been forces to stall for time, possibly for your very life, while desperately trying to figure out a way home. Then Pony Seal Team Six tried to zap you to literal Hell before you barely escaped. All this with your only ally being a unicorn with PTSD who now refused to talk to you, because fuck your life. You didn’t ask to be here, you didn’t WANT to be here! And yet just about everyone you’d come into contact with had tried to enslave you or outright KILL YOU! THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH PLACE! Collapsing to the floor, you were wracked with heaves and shakes. Whether it was from the sobbing or the pent-up rage now released, you didn’t know. Not like it mattered. You just…you just wanted to be left alone. For what felt like a long time, you laid there, probably not looking the most attractive you’ve ever been. You didn’t care, not like anyone was there. If you wanted to have a breakdown in your dreams, then who the hell was going to stop you? Eventually you noticed a silvery light shining ahead of you. You look up to see the Moon. Or at least an approximation of it. It wasn’t painful to look at, but still bright enough to obscure the features of the silhouette of the figure within it. Wait, what? There was a face in the moon. Staring at you. Not knowing what else to do, you stared back. At first you felt like you should be alarmed, but you weren’t. Something about that face seemed…kind? Sympathetic? You couldn’t quite place the feeling, but it rather pleasant. The moon started to drift towards you. Gently, like a cloud. As opposed to hurtling towards you like Majora’s Mask. As the moon got closer, you felt like something, or someone, was trying to…talk to you…? You reach out towards the moon, hoping to make contact. Your fingers almost reach the silvery orb… Only for it to be snatched away by multicolored blur. The creature that stood before you…Well, it was almost too crazy even for a dream. It looked like God gave a four-year old a box of animal parts and said ‘Go nuts.’ “Okay, I’m definitely losing it. Otherwise my head’s not nearly fucked up enough to come up with this.” You stated flatly. The creature shot you a sour look as it dribbled the moon like a basketball, the silhouette inside bouncing like a bobblehead. “Firstly, rude. Second, you're more creative than you give yourself credit for. You just haven’t tried to use for more than sarcasm and cynicism. Quite the waste.” It retorted. You blinked. It sounded a lot more pleasant than you’d first thought. Also vaguely familiar…The connection was almost made when the thing popped up right behind you, wearing a red robe and an odd black hat. “Oh, don’t go there. The last thing we need is to start with that obvious joke. It’s been done to death.” And right on queue, it’s flesh disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving only bones behind. Its jaw opened and hung slack for emphasis. You jumped in surprise, and tried to put as much distance between you and that thing as possible. If you could just stall long enough to wake up, this would all be over. As you glanced over your shoulder, you saw the creature gaining on you. Only it wasn’t running. It was floating mid-air, sitting a position not dissimilar to being in a car. The robe was replaced by a police uniform, one of those brown ones you’d see in the Southern US complete with wide brimmed hat. The now-flattened moon now appeared to serve as a steering wheel. There were even red-and-blue lights and a siren. It raised it’s lion paw to its mouth. “Pull over!” it commanded, its voice sounding exactly like it was coming from a bullhorn. You stopped, less out of obedience and more out of sheer astonishment. The thing screeched to stop behind you. Like, a literal tire screetched. It pantomimed getting out of a car and swaggered up to you, the moon under one ‘arm.’ “License n’ registration?” it said in an awfully fake Southern accent as it looked you over from behind its aviator sunglasses. “I…I don’t…?’ you stammered in response, at a loss for what else to do. “An illegal, then?” it accused, then continued in it’s normal voice, “Not surprising, considering how a human like you got here in the first place.” “I’m not-how do you-…Wait human?” you sputtered out. “Well yes, human. I have eyes.” It proceeded to take them out of its head and show you them. “So, you know what a human is? And you don’t think I’m a demon?” The thing blinked, its eyes reappearing in their sockets. “A demon? It that…Hold on, one moment.” It said before punting the moon out of sight like a kickball. “Is that what they think you are, a demon?” “Well…yeah. That’s what I keep hearing.” You reply. The creature exploded with laughter. A literal explosion of miniature versions of itself giggling and guffawing. After a minute or two the minis collected themselves back into a singular being, who was still chuckling a bit as the stragglers made it back. “Haha! You! A demon! Oh, that the funniest thing I’ve heard of since the time that I convinced a major corporation that making live-action versions of beloved classic movies was a good idea!” You were about to ask what the hell it was talking about, but it cut you off before you could by pushing you into a surprisingly comfortable armchair that hadn’t been there before. The area around the two of you darkened, and a projector light appeared on a screen the creature pulled from thin air. “Although to be fair, you humans don’t exactly have the cleanest hands.” It remarked gesturing to the screen. On it was a montage of humanities lowest points. War. Slavery. Greed. The ET video game. “Don’t get me wrong, you’ve had some good points too.” The screen changed to the high points. Peace. Freedom. Cooperation. Cat videos. “So that begs the question-” Suddenly you were whisked from the chair and onto a comically large microscope. You felt a bit self-conscious as the creatures yellow-and-red eye studied you. “How did you end up here of all places?” You began to answer but got cut off again. “That’s rhetorical. I know how you got here. Radical cult, flubbed summoning, yadda yadda.” In a blink, you appeared on a comfy couch, in a neat office. The creature was nearby in a chair, with a grey beard, and wearing a tweed sweater vest. “What I want to know is: What’s up with this dream of yours? This isn’t somewhere folks with a healthy outlook on life end up. So what’s up?” You just stared at this thing. Honestly, what else was there to do? “Oh, right, manners. Sorry, I’m still getting used to this whole ‘polite’ thing.” It took the top of it’s head off like a hat and tipped it. “I am Discord, Draconequus, Spirit of Disharmony, Crown Prince of Chaos, Lord of Lunacy, and Pawtucet County High School Prom Queen.” At your incredulous look, he sighed. “A lot of liquor was involved. Turns out even I have an upper tolerance. And who might you be?” You began to respond but are, once again, cut off. “You know what, doesn’t matter. What does is what’s going on in this little noggin of yours.” He taps you sharply on the top of your head. “…Am I allowed to talk this time or you gonna change the subject again?” you ask. ‘Discord’ waved his eagle hand. “I’ve had my fun. And I am genuinely curious.” “…Why? Just about everyone else I’ve met hardly had my best intentions at heart. Ever since I got here, it feels like everyone expects me to be evil and are just…waiting for a reason to confirm it!” The draconequus nodded sadly. “Yes, if feels like they’re just waiting for you to mess up. So they can get rid of you.” “Exactly! I’m stuck in some basement for a month with a bunch of maniacs, then suddenly a hexa-hit squad started throwing rainbow nukes at me! Nearly got a concussion…” Discord laughed. “I suppose you have a point. Some of the Elements can be pretty hotheaded.” “You know those crazy bitches? They tried to kill me!” Light faded from the area as Discord’s face darkened. “In the spirit of recent changes I’m going to let that comment slide. Just, remember those are my friends. While some of those friendships are stronger than others, I promise you: I can do much worse than kill you. Remember that.” To say your spirit fell would be an understatement. It was low to start with, and now it went subterranean. The ominous threat aside, you were now aware of the company you now kept. “You're friends with them? Great. Now your gonna tell them where I am and I’m dead.” “Pssh, I’m not turning you in. This is the most fun I’ve had in months! And I didn’t even have to do anything!” “Okay, weird friendship you got there, but at least I get to live another day. Hey, what CAN you do, anyway? All I’ve seen you do is mess with my dreams.” The starry motif returned as Discord’s face blanked. “Have I? Didn’t notice. I guess compared to telling the laws of reality to sit in the corner on a regular basis altering the dreamscape is more or less passive. And before you ask: Yes, I can technically send you home. No, I will not.” “What? WHY NOT!?” you roar. “Because,” Discord says, zipping your mouth shut, “sending a creature through the multiverse without knowing exactly where to send it could result you ending up somewhere far worse than where you are, assuming of course you survive, and all that precision makes me feel ill. Also, the longer you’re here is all the more fun for me!” Discord put his face close to yours with a smug look. “So, feel better now?” You try to reply but fail, what with your mouth still being sealed. A glare was the best response you could muster. Mister Mis-match sighed dramatically and snaped his claws, and you feel your mouth freed from its binding. “You’ve literally done nothing helpful since you got here.” You note, thoroughly irritated. “Well excuuuse me, Princess. I’m still new to this whole ‘caring about other creature’s feelings’ thing.” Discord snapped, drawing back and striking a dramatic pose. “…Was that a Zelda reference…?” you ask. Suddenly, Discord wrapped you up in a slightly-too-tight hug. “Someone finally understands…This is truly a blessing…” he sniffled with a shining tear running down his cheek. You choked out squeak, indicating you are running out of air. How you could suffocate in a dream, you didn’t know. Nor did you want to find out. Positively beaming, Discord releases you. “Oh, watching you is going to be so much fun! But I guess if I keep you here, it won’t happen…besides, I think you have some pressing matters to attend to. Doubt Amber can handle it on her own.” He says with a chuckle. “What…what does that mean…?” Discord laughs and snaps a claw. “Don’t worry you’ll find out in a moment.” You vision began to swim and blur. Falling to your knees as Discord and the world around you fade into darkness. You were waking up. The voice of the mad god echoes around you in the darkness. “This should be fun. I promise you it’ll be quite the hands-on experience.” The morning’s light shone through the cave entrance as you jumped awake. Was that real? You asked yourself as you rubbed the remainders of sleep from eyes. Amber. You remembered the creature’s cryptic words, and you looked to where Amber had been sleeping the night before. She was gone.