22 Questions
After returning home, Golden quietly stopped us with a foreleg. She leaned down and whispered in our ear.
"I haven't forgotten about what I said at breakfast. I'll go talk to Berry about you meeting with Smoky. And… I guess I can trust you to be alone with her if you swear you're okay with it."
Sunny responded with a smile and quiet nod, pressing against Golden for a moment. A moment that seemed to take forever.
And with that, Golden walked out of the door.
"So uh, while we wait…" Sunny started. "What's that thing you called Noi after saving her? ‘Jake’ something?"
"Somebody from my past life." I answered evasively. "Long story."
"We have time." Sunny fired back.
I sat there for a few moments, thinking over my next course of action.
"Let's make a deal." I finally responded. "I answer one question about my past, you answer one about yours."
I could tell she hated that idea, but when dealing with troubled kids, sometimes you have to press them gently into a compromise.
"Okay, I guess that's fair." Sunny relented, making her way to the couch and laying on her back. "You first?"
I signed. "Jakey is my little brother. He's a bit… special. Like, short bus special. So he'd absolutely show off like Noi was, just to get attention. I mean, I love him… loved him, but he was a complete idiot. My turn."
I could feel a wave of anxiety come from Sunny. What would be a good casual question to ease her into talking about her family?
"How old are you?" I decided that was a good one.
"Sixteen."
"What!? I thought you were way younger. Like, pre-pubescent."
That was an easy fifteen years old in decimal. I was just expecting her to be closer to twelve.
Sunny let out a quiet giggle. "I am. Calves don't start puberty until they're around eighteen. I'm guessing humans have a shorter lifespan? I know I learned that ponies live about a hundred fifty cycles. Kirin usually live closer to eight hundred fifty if they're in good health, so I guess we grow slower."
Well that was a lot of info. It revealed that not only did kirin experience puberty and not heat, which thank fucking god for, but also that kirin definitely were more a mythical race, having lifespans closer to dragons than ponies.
It also revealed that even though it seems kirin in pony towns was uncommon, and ponies didn't understand some things about kirin, like water walking, that kirin seemed to have a basic knowledge of ponies. Now if I was decent at converting from base ten to base nine… ponies lived about a hundred twenty to a hundred thirty years, and kirin? Shit, I'd ballpark that to the early to mid seven hundreds.
"So in terms of maturity and growth between kirin and ponies, how many years old do you think you'd be as a pony?"
Sunny hummed. "Uh, not sure. Only a few cycles older than Noi. Probably… eleven or twelve? When my class visited a pony town, those were the ages of the ponies we hung out with more. Uh, that's eleven or twelve in my counting system, not theirs."
Sunny took a moment to try to convert the numbers in her head.
"Yeah, eleven or twelve."
Okay, that made far more sense.
"My turn." Sunny announced. "Tell me about your dad. You seem to care about him a lot."
"I do." I smiled. "I mean, anybody that can raise both me and my brother deserves all the respect. While growing up, he was a prominent member of a military called the Marines. A bunch of tough bastards. But looking at him, you'd never guess he had a heart of gold. I know he was always under stress, taking care of Jakey and me, but he never crumbled. I did hear him break down at night when he thought we went to bed though. He eventually retired though, after he sent me off to college using his military benefits."
"He sounds great!" Sunny chirped. "I bet I'd love him."
"You absolutely would." I smiled. "But, he had his own vices. Let's just say I inherited his… affection for alcohol. And he always had enough hidden in the house that he never noticed I stole enough to get a shot a day."
Fuck, I could really use a drink. It'd just… make this nicer. More casual. Better.
"I guess that brings me to my next question." Sunny mused. "How old were you when you started drinking?"
"Uhh…" I stalled. That was not a question I wanted to answer. Of course, a drink could make that question easier. "I'd say I was about your age. Young enough where a single shot would have me sailing smooth all day."
A sudden burst of what felt like pain burst from Sunny, sapping the heat from our entire body, tailtip to horn.
"That's… really young." Sunny managed. "Are you an angr- uh, are you gonna be okay without it?"
She cut off a question about me being an angry drunk.
Interesting…
"I left most of the physical symptoms behind in the actually addicted body." I admitted, realizing how lucky I was in regards to getting clean. "But I'd be damned if I don't just… constantly think of how nice a drink would be. Like, just go through life while in a constant state of tipsy."
"I uh… know." Sunny chuckled nervously. "I can hear your thoughts, remember?"
Oh shit.
"My turn to ask a question." I claimed. "What can you tell me about your parents?"
What followed was a long, tense silence.
"Next question." Sunny choked.
I really wanted to remind her of the deal, and that she owed me a question… but shit, that sounded like trauma there. I had to be gentle.
"Sunny," I tried my best to emulate a sympathetic tone. "I share the same brain as you. I'm always gonna be there for you. But you're never gonna feel any better if you hide from your past. I'm not asking you to tell anybody else. Just me. I won't tell a soul if you don't want me to."
For almost a minute Sunny was dead silent. I was about to call it quits when she quietly responded.
"You remember that cow I was telling you about? Autumn Blaze?"
"Yeah," I replied quickly. "I remember you saying she was the… alchemist?"
"Herbalist." Sunny corrected. "She wasn't… wasn't the first one I knew. Bitter Herb, my mom, was the one before her. She was, heh, despite her name, the sweetest kirin you'd ever meet. Always saw the best in everyone and everything. She loved nothing more than helping others, anybody from a tiny chipmunk to the village elder. I loved her so much. But her ability to see the best in everyone led her to my father."
Sunny trailed off, shuddering.
"What was he like?"
Sunny paused again, chewing on her lip.
"Violent."
I could swear I felt my heart skip.
"Did he-"
"No." Sunny replied forcefully. "He didn't hit me. I mean sometimes he shoved me to the side if he was going somewhere and I wasn't moving away fast enough, but…"
Sunny paused for a moment to wipe her eyes.
"Sometimes he was a good father. A good bull. He apologized for all the mean stuff he did, for all his 'mood swings', and was nice to be around. Treated me and Smoky to ice cream and stuff every day. Actually seemed to love us all. Mom loved that version of him, and swore to use all her herbalist knowledge to help him."
Another eye wipe. Another sigh.
"Mom always tolerated his jerk-ishness. But one day, he had another of his mood swings. He… he hit Smoky really hard. I still don't know why. Knocked two of her teeth out. That's when mom threw him out. That was the first time I saw a full Nirik, an-"
Sunny let out a dry sob and buried her face into one of the pillow cushions.
"I hid. I was curled up, and I remember Smoky was holding me, trying to calm me down, blood pouring down her muzzle, and the room was so full of smoke and heat. And I just… hid. Hid behind the kirin that was actually hurt."
"Hey, hey." I crooned, wishing I could be next to her in person, instead of uselessly stuck in her head. "You were just a kid. Still are. Don't beat yourself up about it. Is that why you're so scared every time you start going Nirik?"
Sunny took a moment to sit up, wipe her eyes, and take a few deep breaths. "No. I know mom just did it to protect us."
Okay, so then that was a story for later.
"What happened next?"
"He did leave." Sunny shuffled a bit against the cushion. "I don't know where he went. Smoky doesn't know either. Things went back to normal for a few days. And then…
"Mom always told me I was the best of him. I got the humor, the whole 'seeing art in everything thing', and the prankster nature. I mean we kinda… abused mom's plant knowledge. Heh, once we put a mixture in the elders shampoo that dyed her coat pink. We had a bit of reputation, but nobody ever really did anything to get back at us. It was all in good fun."
Sunny paused for a moment, playing absentmindedly with a string coming off the seam of the couch cushion in front of her.
"Like I said, we didn't see him for another few days. One day Smoky and I were walking home from school, and… well, she stopped me before we opened the door. Looked right in the window and just froze. When she moved next, she told me she forgot she had a big surprise for me somewhere else that she forgot. She led me to the playground, and I didn't see her for another hour at least. That… I… I got tired of waiting, so I decided to go home to grab a snack, see if I could run into her. That's when I saw a bunch of kirin standing around my house, and…"
Sunny's hoof had started smoking, and the string she was playing with had burnt off. She didn't seem to notice though, and was still poking around the cushion.
"Do you know what the punishment for murder is among the kirin?" Sunny asked suddenly.
"Uh, no idea."
"I dunno exactly how it works, but the shaman does some stuff to the brain of kirin who do that stuff. It makes them kinda dumb, makes them react much slower, and they can't use magic. Then… not too far from our village is a fire swamp where a big, mean chimera lives. If the kirin can come back with proof they uh, got rid of it, they can be welcomed back to the city. No kirin has ever defeated the chimera."
"What, so they basically lobotomize them and let them get torn apart by feral beasts? That's kinda… brutal."
"It's not brutal enough!" Sunny shouted out loud, erupting up and stomping on the couch. It left a small black mark against the dark brown fabric. "Not nearly enough!"
"Woah, hey Sunny, I'm sorry. You don't have to go on if you don't want to."
"I…" Sunny took several deep breaths before returning to communicating silently with me. "I don't… I don't remember most of that day. But… seeing mom like that… I can never forget that, no matter how hard I've tried."
"Is that why you're so afraid of confrontation?" I asked softly.
"It's part of the reason." Sunny answered mysteriously. "Please, let's change the topic."
"Of course. What do you wanna talk about?"
"What about Maria? I get you two were uh…" Sunny paused awkwardly. "Good friends."
I laughed. "Good friends? What are you, a history book? No, we were dating."
"Were?" Sunny questioned.
"Well yeah, not like we're in my world anymore. I dunno if she exists anymore. Or at all."
Another moment of silence.
"That's not one hundred percent true. I messed up really badly a few days before I woke up in this world and we split up. So yeah, we were dating."
Sunny let out a weak chuckle. "You, mess up? I don't believe it."
"Hey, you little punk, don't sass me!" I laughed back. "Hey, you're being a lot more social today. I'm real proud of you."
A feeling of warmth tinged with embarrassment washed throughout the body.
"Well, you're easy to be comfortable around. When uh, you aren't getting drunk or being a big ol' butt to others."
"Oh then you'd never get along with me before last week." I grinned. A second later I froze, realizing how true that was. I was known as kind of a cunt in my unit, as I was more focused on getting shit done at work, then getting off so I could drink myself to sleep. No socializing, no jokes, just constant training. My soldiers did not appreciate that.
But that had changed when I got to Equestria.
I guess that's fitting.
"I hope you don't mind me asking." Sunny interrupted my train of thought. "But why did you break up with her? You seem like you really loved her."
Now it was my turn to be embarrassed.
"Actually, she broke up with me. All because I was an idiot. So, Maria and I lived together on base. Her job had her taking a little trip away, where she wouldn't be home for a couple nights." I explained. "One night I decided it was more a 'get drunk at the bar instead of at home' nights. So business as usual, I went to my favorite bar. Saw some friends there, and we started playing drinking games. Take a shot every time you knock a ball in at pool."
"Pool?" Sunny asked.
"Popular game at bars. Play with a long stick and hit balls into holes. Anyway, since I could drink a lot more than all my friends before getting drunk, I ended up playing all of them and getting completely plastered. Long story short, I saw some guys from my unit who were also drunk, and uh… well, I didn't go home alone. I wasn't thinking straight and had an… itch I wanted to scratch."
"What, did they have some poultice that gets rid of itchiness?" Sunny giggled. "Why would they go to your home, then? They'd have it in theirs."
Jesus. I'm about to ruin this kid's innocence. Well, ruin it more.
"In a manner of speaking. I didn't sleep alone that night, let's just say."
"I don't get it."
"Kid, you ever had a reproductive or sexual health class?"
"We did once. It was really gross an-" Sunny froze suddenly. "Oh. OH. EWWW. You did that with a guy?"
"Two guys at once actually." I gave off a sheepish laugh. "They left the next day, and well… when Maria came back she saw the pregnancy tests in the trash. When she confronted me, I told her the truth. I couldn't lie to her. Not about that."
For almost a minute Sunny was silent. When she finally responded, it was in a hesitant, shaky voice.
"At least the tests came up negative, right?"
I let out a hollow laugh.
"Two of three said positive."
"...Oh. Oh my gosh I… I'm so sorry."
"Nah. See, that's why coming here was a good thing." I forced out another harsh laugh. "I mean, I never would be able to find it in myself to bring one of those little goblins to term, but even if I did, can you imagine me being a parent? Shit, I'd be the worst. Any kid would be better off dead than being raised by me."
"You do pretty well with Noi and me." Sunny made a halfhearted attempt at cheering me up. I mean, not that I needed cheering up. She probably just thought it did, naïvely. Easy mistake. "I mean, Noi might have died today if not for you."
"I'm also not y'all's mom." I replied with a bit more venom than intended. "I'm just playing the role of the big sister. That's the most I should ever be. But yeah… that aside, Maria broke up with me, and five days later I woke up in your body. That day… that's the biggest regret of my life, and it was all because I was being an idiot."
Several moments passed in tense silence as I tried to think of something to change the topic to. Something nice and pleasant, preferably.
"Same with me." Sunny piped up out of the blue.
"Huh?"
"I… Well, nobody knows this except Smoky, at least nobody here, but my biggest regret, biggest mistake, whatever, was caused by me being an idiot, too."
I bit back a sarcastic remark of how her regrets couldn't be too big considering how young she was, but… shit, she obviously had some baggage she wasn't willing to open up about.
"I… don't want to… well, uh…" Sunny chewed on her lip. "When kirin are younger, they have less of a grip on their own natural magic than older kirin."
"Makes sense."
"This means that if we're talking just having your first nirik transformation, mine would be worse than Smoky's, and Noi's would be worse than mine now. I mean, if we each were in the same situation."
"Emotional maturity probably factors in too." I guessed.
"Right. Uh, you asked why I was so scared about going Nirik, right?" Sunny asked tepidly.
"Well, confrontation in general, but yes." I answered.
"I hope you aren't angry, but I don't think I can talk about the day yet. But… I'm the reason. Almost a moon ago I had my first complete nirik transformation and um… it… I.. hurt a lot of kirin. Like…" Sunny trailed off.
Thinking back, I'd been with Sunny for almost two weeks, so if some big event happened right before that…
"Bad enough you had to leave the village with your sister?" The puzzle pieces clicked, finally.
"...Yeah." Sunny replied in a quiet tone. "The reason I jumped off the train is because Smoky and I sort of… snuck on. We didn't have tickets, and when the train, uh… conductor? Whoever looks for tickets asked us about ours, Smoky started getting nervous. Said there was no chance we could go back to the village. She started going nirik and my brain sort of… turned off. So since we were in the last cart thing, I ran. And when there was nowhere left to go…"
"You jumped in a blind panic." I realized.
"Normally King would be able to talk me down, but after the… event, the first thing Smoky did was bring me to the Shaman so he could remove him and Orange, like he did with Melody a few cycles before. Then we ran."
"I know you don't want to tell me about what happened yet, but would you be willing to later? After we work on some stuff? It might help you out when Golden sends us to therapy."
"I… maybe. Just not today." Sunny answered. "And I remember Golden mentioning therapy. What is it?"
"Professional mental health worker helps you work through your issues far better than I can help with."
"What?! I don't want to talk about my past with some stranger! Only you and Smoky. And maybe Golden. She's really nice."
Sunny definitely picked up on the waves of doubt I sent off with that statement.
"What's your issue with her? She's done nothing wrong." Sunny asked, actually sounding a little defensive.
"Call it a sister's intuition. I don't trust her and I don't think you should either. I trust Script and Noi more, easily. But you know I'll always listen."
Sunny chuckled. "You know, you're great. You're like a Smoky in my head, but funnier. I feel like the universe sent the perfect human just to me."
Fuckin'… aww.
Stupid kid making me feel emotions and shit.
"Yeah, maybe I was sent here to take care of a scared little kirin foal, and show her how badass she is." I smiled.
"Orrrr…" Sunny sent a smile back. "Maybe you were sent here so we can help you."
"...What?"
"Well I mean, I've had a lot of big bad stuff happen, sure, but you just seem kinda… more messed up than me. I mean, I never got any addictions."
I let out a dry chuckle. "Kiddo, I'm not more messed up. I'm just older."
"Does age always bring misery?"
"Kinda d-" I clammed up. "Well, actually I don't know. Sure seems that way sometimes. Ignorance is bliss and all that."
"Dang." Sunny let loose a small wave of disappointment. "Growing older sounds super sucky."
"Hah, it absolutely is. Enjoy being young as much as you can."
"Deal." Sunny chirped. "I still can't believe you did… that… with two bulls."
"We call them 'men' when they're human." I clarified. "Give it a couple years and that won't sound so gross to you anymore."
"Huh." Sunny hummed. "I'm gonna switch you up front, and go internal so I don't have to think about that."
"Sounds good, I'm gonna see about getting some lunch."
Upon leaving Noi's room with Noi in tow, Script started on lunch. It looked like some basic instant potatoes and gravy, but you wouldn't find me complaining. Potatoes were great. They tasted good, could be a bunch of different dishes, and best of all, were a key ingredient in vodka. They're as close to a miracle fruit as it gets. Even though they're vegetables. I think.
Noi, however, didn't seem to want to eat. She took a few bites, but kept stealing glances at me. It was actually kinda annoying. I hated being stared at, and several times had to bite back a scalding remark. I didn't want to yell at Noi. I kinda liked her. As far as little kids went, she was alright.
"What?" I finally had enough, placing my fork down and staring at her. I somewhat expected her to react bashfully, but she didn't even try to hide the staring.
"Dad says you're gonna see your sister soon, and that she's almost an adult."
"Yeah." I responded evenly.
"Are you gonna leave us?" Noi asked, visibly deflating.
I set my jaw. That did not go as I expected. I kinda felt bad for assuming she was kinda being a dumb kid.
"I know she's your actual sister…" Noi continued. "But you're really awesome, and you saved my life this morning, well, I was kinda hoping you'd stick around for… a long time."
Goddamn these kids and their ability to somehow tear my heart to shreds.
"That's not my choice." I stalled. "I'm Jenny, and it's Sunny's choice who she lives with. That said, Smoky won't be able to legally take care of us for another year."
I gave Noi a gentle smile. "I can't say anything, for sure, kiddo. But I know Sunny likes you too, and it's not like even if we live with Smoky, that we'll never visit you."
Noi fixed me with a weak smile.
"Promise?"
I held my good forehoof out across the table.
"Sisters." I promised.
"Sisters!" Noi beamed, shaking my hoof.
"So this one is… Ra?" I chewed on my lip.
"Close." Script smiled. "Re."
"Ugh." I grunted in annoyance.
Don't get me wrong, I did like learning languages. But usually with languages, I could come up with mnemonics. Ponish made no sense, though. Earth Pony script was just a bunch of boxes with different holes.
"What's a… nemonm- menon-... Whatever you thought?" Sunny suddenly popped up and asked.
I'll admit the sudden question and intrusion via thought reading made me jump a bit.
"Christ. I keep forgetting you can read my mind." I thought to Sunny. "A mnemonic is a tool used to remember something. Like, the character 'hi' in one of the languages I speak looks like the body of a penguin, so I remember it as a penguin coming to say 'hi'."
"What's a penguin?"
"Big fat black and white bird that lives in cold places and can't fly."
"Awww, they sound so stupid!" Sunny cooed. "I want twenty."
I let out a chuckle and Script, confused, turned to me.
"I say something funny?" He asked.
"Sorry, no, something Sunny said." I smiled.
"Oh, you two having a secret conversation?" Script chuckled.
"Absolutely," I winked. "I'd clue you in, but no big stinky stallions invited."
"Such a sassy child." Script rolled his eyes and smiled. "Where did I go so wrong?"
"Existing. Terrible choice really, especially in this economy." I grinned. Script responded with a hearty laugh.
Script ready did remind me a lot of my dad. He was a little more jokey, a little more awkward, but had the same… energy to him. Most of our interactions were kind of… familiar. And for the first time, I started to hope Sunny wouldn't move in with Smoky.
I mean, minus my doubts about a certain member of the family, I really had all I needed here. I could retry my childhood. I wouldn't have to spend my time making sure Noi got in as much trouble as Jakey, I had the dad that was engaging enough for two kids. I had the younger sibling that already loved me.
Was that a weird thought? Did normal people fantasize about retrying their childhood? I mean, yeah. I was being melodramatic. My childhood wasn't bad. I was just… wanting in some places. So what? So many have it worse. Sunny herself has it worse.
"Doesn't mean you have no reasons to complain." Sunny interrupted my brooding. I jumped again.
"Please stop reading my thoughts." I humbly requested.
"I literally can't." Sunny sassed.
Such a demon child.
About an hour after lunch, Golden returned, fixing me with a smile and a nod.
"Sorry for the wait. I got distracted catching up with Berry. Sunny, dear? I have a present for you."
With a start, Sunny started fronting and jumped off the couch.
"Ooh, I like presents!" She smiled.
That's when a familiar sight stepped out from behind Golden.
Sand colored coat. Big doe-like eyes. Emerald carapace and forehead scales.
"Smoky!" Sunny cried, breaking out into a run and throwing herself at her sister. Smoky caught her with open hooves and squeezed her tightly.
"I'm so sorry I scared you like that." Smoky whispered into our ear. "Are you okay here? Is this family treating you well? Are ponies being mean to you?"
Sunny didn't respond instantly, instead trying to just soak in the warmth Smoky was giving off.
"I…" Sunny wiped off a tear on Smoky's coat. "I am so sorry I acted like I did. Did I get you in trouble?"
Smoky shrugged. "Nothing I couldn't handle. The nurses were mostly interested in why you reacted in such a way. When I didn't tell them, I think they thought I calfnapped you."
"You… didn't tell them?" Sunny sniffed, breaking the hug to look into Smoky's eyes.
"Well you see…" Smoky smirked. "My little will-o'-the-wisp asked me not to mention it to anybody."
"Will-o'-the-wisp?" I asked.
"Uh, mom's nickname for me." Sunny communicated nonverbally.
"I didn't mean to the point you get in trouble!" Sunny protested. "Just not to families and friends!"
"I'd like to see them try anything with me." Smoky chortled. "I'll kick all their rumps."
Sunny didn't respond, just tried in vain to hug her sister harder.
"So." Smoky enunciated slowly. "Heard you've had a very interesting stay while here. And quite a rescue this morning."
"Well actually…" Sunny looked down, a mild wave of embarrassment accompanied by the flopping of her ears to the side. "Jenny did that. Oh! You haven't met Jenny! She's th-"
Sunny stopped suddenly at the look on Smoky's face. Smoky was wearing a frown, her mouth thin and her eyebrows cross.
Sunny took a deep breath, squeezing her eyes tightly shut and pulling away from Smoky, then met her gaze.
"She. Is. Real." Sunny responded with a hardness I haven't yet heard. A hardness, and also a pain. She stomped on the ground to emphasize her point. "I'm not a liar."
Smoky closed her eyes and gave a small nod.
"I know you believe that. I do. Just… you gotta be careful with this stuff, you know?"
"Why?" Sunny fired back, her anger moving more into confusion. "We're safe here. This family cares. Jenny cares."
"Damn straight." I added.
Smoky was silent for a few moments, before gesturing at the door.
"Follow me."
All fell quiet and Smoky led Sunny and I outside. We followed her around to the side of the house, where Smoky sat down with a look of distaste on her face.
"I want to talk to Jenny." She spoke simply.
A giant wave of fear washed over Sunny as she pushed me to front.
Seemingly recognizing the symptoms of switching alters, Smoky spoke again.
"Jenny?"
"You're scaring Sunny." I spoke flatly.
"You are Sunny." Smoky replied in the same tone. "I know you like your imaginary friends, but it's time to cut this delusion."
Waves of both sudden anger and fear wracked my mind in tandem.
"I remember a whole life before being in this body." I took a more aggressive stance, fighting to keep my tone under control."I know Sunny trusts you, but again, you're scaring her. Give me a good reason to not walk away and tell Golden you're not to be trusted around her again."
"Oh?" Smoky chuckled, arching an eyebrow. "And now you care about Sunny? After all you've done to her?
"Anyth- anything I've done that was bad was before I knew she was even in here." I did my best to not wince as I stumbled over words.
"Right." Smoky laughed. "Injuring both forelegs. Getting her drunk, all the emotional junk. You don't care about her, you're just trying to cover your back. I don't know what you are, but if you had a life before her, then you're a parasite. Leave. My. Sister. Alone."
"Your hooves aren't clean either." I spat, my primary fangs slipping out. Fire coursed through my entire body. I don't know what had set me off so hard, but I know the fear and anger of the little girl I was trying to protect sure wasn't helping. "You may have helped her with her parents, but you ripped her away from her hometown. You took her alters, her COPING mechanism for the trauma she's undergone, and removed them. Do you understand her condition at all? No!" I was shouting now. "Do you know how much DAMAGE you can do to a little kid when messing around with mental illness?! No! You shot first and didn't ask questions later. I didn't do perfectly, yes I got her drunk, but at least I didn't damage her mind more!"
I was breathing hard now. The waves of fear from Sunny had far outnumbered the anger.
"I had to. There was no other choice." Smoky's voice suddenly lost its anger. "In our village, minors get treated the same as adults. There's no way she could have killed the chimera. There's no way we could do it together."
I froze. I was unable to move, or even breathe. I couldn't think. The only thing I could make sense of was the deadly serious face of Smoky, and the fully blown waves of terror coming from Sunny.
"She… broke… the… promise…" Sunny choked.
"You didn't know?" Smoky guessed.
I shook my head to rid myself of the shocked expression. "That's the only thing she refuses to open up about."
Smoky closed her eyes and let out a long exhale. "Can I talk to her?"
"Sunny?" I thought.
"No."
I let out a quick sigh out and met Smoky's gaze.
"She doesn't want to talk." I answered. "Just said you broke the promise."
"I'm not breaking the promise if I tell herse-" Smoky muttered, hoof over her eyes. "Look, you do honestly care about her?"
"More than myself." I answered without thought.
"Then… dammit. This is my lunch break, I gotta go. I will be over to see her tomorrow, if she'll have me. Look, we may not get along, but we both care about her, right?" Smoky chewed on her lip, before extending her forehoof.
I sighed. Yeah, I could see where this was going. "Yeah. We do. I get that you think you're best for her, and that she trusts you for reasons I don't fully understand…" I pushed away her hoof. "But she's being watched by actual adults now, in a city of ponies that would absolutely step in if she needed any protection. She needs better than both of us can give her, and I'm gonna make sure she gets it."
I paused, squeezing my eyes shut and glaring back at Smoky. "Without you. I think you need to take some time to re-evaluate your priorities. Sunny's happiness comes before accusing another personality of being a shitty kirin. Always. You've taken care of her so far, but if you can't understand that, then maybe you shouldn't be around her anymore."
With that note, I turned tail, and left Smoky sitting quietly in the shade of the house.
I walked inside without Smoky. And of course, with just our luck, all three ponies inside were staring at us.
"How much did y'all hear?" I sighed.
"Not a lot." Golden answered softly, reaching out to hug us. I ducked away. Golden held her hoof out for a second before smartly retracting it. "Just the shouted parts."
I rubbed the side of my muzzle as Noi made her way over to us. She pressed the top of her head into the underside of our chin and leaned into us.
"Are you okay, sister?" Noi asked. "A hug always makes me feel better. Please feel better."
Fighting another sigh, I pulled her in closer with a foreleg. "I'm fine. Sunny is hiding, but she'll be okay. I'm just gonna…" I broke the kind-of hug and stepped back, meeting the gazes of everyone there.
"I'm gonna go to bed early."
I groaned as I woke. I had definitely just screwed my sleep schedule up. It was probably like one in the morning. I rolled over and leaned my head over the mattress, idly watching Noi's fish swim around lazily.
Speaking of which, I feel like there was something I was forgetting about. Something important.
My eyes shot open as I shot to my hooves, scrambling down the ladder. I turned quickly, seeing Noi lying peacefully. Too pea-
Noi opened her eyes and I breathed out a sigh of relief.
"What's the matter?" She asked, lifting her head off the pillow.
"Noi, how's your breathing? Have you been coughing since the lake? Are you nauseated?"
Noi furrowed her brows. "No, I'm fine. Why?"
I let out a sigh of relief. "In rare cases, kids can get something called secondary drowning. If there's water left in your lungs…" I died off. No point in scaring her if she really was fine. "If you're not feeling chest pain or weirdly sleepy, you're fine though. It'd show by now."
I mean that was a flat out lie. It could happen within the next two nights.
"Oh." Noi replied tiredly. "No. I feel fine. Just… tired. Because it's really late."
"Then why don't you go to sleep?" I asked gently.
Noi blinked hard as tears appeared in her eyes.
"I-I'm scared." She whispered. "I know I'm gonna have a nightmare."
Oh boy. I actually had plenty of experience with this. Jake had nightmares all the time.
I made my way over to her bed, getting to my hind legs so I could peek at her above the corner of her mattress.
"Want me to sing something to you?" I asked gently.
Before coming to Equestria, I would die before singing something in front of anybody but Maria or Jake. But… hey, a scared kid almost died this morning. Who am I to say no if I could help her?
Noi nodded silently.
With a deep breath in, I jumped on the bed next to her. Noi adjusted so her head was in between my haunches, looking up to me with a timid expression.
"Do kirin or… humans have lullabies?" She asked softly, and I could see enough detail now to see the tear tracks already on her face.
I smiled down on her. "We do, but growing up my dad never sang me traditional lullabies. He said a real song comes from something you connect to emotionally."
I closed my eyes as I thought through all my favorite artists and songs. I needed something soft, but that I could put emotion into. Something innocent enough. Something I could change the lyrics to, to something personal to me. To give feeling to. Something perfect.
I pulled a lock of mane out of Noi's face and pulled her into a more comfortable position. Then, I cleared my throat and began to sing.
Dry lightning cracks across the skies
Those storm clouds gather in her eyes
Her daddy was a tough old mister
Mama was never to be found,
The weatherman called for a twister,
She prayed blow it down
There's not enough rain in Okinawa
To wash the sins out of that house
There's not enough wind in Okinawa
To rip the nails out of the past.
Noi sighed as she cuddled deeper into my warmth, smiling as I finished my song.
"Hey, Jenny?" She hummed sleepily.
"Yeah?" I whispered back.
"You really are a great pony"
I chuckled and responded teasingly. "Don't you mean a great parasite?"
"Mmm no." Noi responded sleepily, rolling onto her side. "You're too awesome to be a parasite. You're my bestest big sister."
There was a moment of absolute quiet, then I heard a gentle snore coming from her.
"...I just hope I can live up to that."
This was the song.
And yes, the title is based on 20 in the kirin number system, if you caught that.
I know I said this was coming out a day after the last chapter, and I'm sorry. Things have been busy lately with exiting the military and moving and I've just been dead.
Anyway, the drama intensifies.
Since some seemed confused, yes, the chimera did kill Sunny's dad.
Will we find out what happened next chapter? Will Smoky return?
All I can say is...the next chapter will part one of a two parter!
Expect a special guest or two. 
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Yeah. And Granny Smith is a Highlander.
My favourite non-pony character.
It seems some things are finnaly coming through for both of them.
I feel a bit sorry for Smoky though. She seems to genuinely trying her best, even if she doesn't understand.
So Basically they're made Tranquil and get sent off to be et. And they can't return unless they manage to take down the apex predator. Yeouch.
Wow, both personalities had their own kind of trauma and issue. This is going to be extremely difficult for the therapist.
It has ups and downs.
somehow, this story slowly lose its sense of curiosity and wonder, the pacing got less optimal.
(Mike drop)
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And it seems their legal system doesn't give a flying f*yay* about extenuating circumstances.
Fuck you smoky.
Now, as my mind slowly falls apart on its own, I have this to say: I agree. Any fucking attempt to kill o alters will only result in more severe mental and developmental damage to the person in question. This should be obvious.
It's a shame, I was looking forward to Smoky :(, but, "We are not one. We are many." is the only way to consider alters. Sort of like patrons in a pub, they may come and go but that doesn't mean they'd never been there.
Nice chapter!
You don't know if she will stop finding that gross Jenny, maybe she likes cows! Or both. That'd make things not gross though...
I'm quite sure their puberty will be very confusing if Sunny's straight.
Wow, certainly a lot to unpack in this chapter. It was nice to learn so much of Sunny's background, though. And I want to like Smokey, or at least sympathize with her, but… Jenny's right. She took away Sunny's coping mechanism, and that was a pretty shitty thing to do. It seems like, strange as it might seem, Jenny was the best thing to happen to Sunny in the immediate aftermath of that whole train incident. Has its obvious downsides, of course, but at least now Sunny has someone she can potentially confide in again (to some degree) when she doesn't want to talk to other ponies.
Smokey is a panicked teen. We don't blame her fully for her mistakes of inexperience.
Wonder if the personality add-ons is genetic or something.... What if Smokey had one too? 😱
You know, I had been expecting the shaman to suddenly appear in Ponyville the "exorcise" Sunny ever since the shaman was introduced. Now, I understood it was Smokey's doing.
I suspect Sunny was in the chimera's area on her own violition to settle some kirin. I don't get the suspicion surrounding Golden and Jenny, but I want to see where this goes!
wow that quite the tradition the "father" seems to have win the life for a life fight but who got the chimera is the real question the poor mother or father? i really hope it was the father...
Not a big fan of Smokey so far.
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Smoky isn't meant to be likable off the start. She's a teen that's been in a constant fight or flight just worried about the physical safety of Sunny since the event with their dad. Their backstory I'll delve into after the two parter.
She does care. But I'll have Sunny give her reasons why she acts the way she does.
Also remember, Smoky is legally a minor for one more year in Ponyville. I never said how old she is relative to the ponies.
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The game was rigged from the start.
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They're both gonna be in therapy for a while. A long while.
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Sorry you don't like it. Some chapters are gonna be more dramatic for character growth, and some are gonna be more fluffy and comedic, and full of learning their new world (and her new race, for Jenny).
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You make my Irish ancestry happy.
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Thanks!
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Or Sunny turns out to be ace and Jenny is just constantly agonized gay spicy horse noises.
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Sunny was never in the chimera's area. She left before that.
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It was the father that went to the chimera. He did not return.
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Oh that'd be absolute murder on Jenny. And on Sunny by dint of always being aware of Jenny's suffering and not being able to quite grok why.
Hmm that does beget the question, would their body react to stimuli when Jenny was on the wheel, in that situation? If so then they'd be quite alien sensations to Sunny, no? Those things get confusing
The starting mental image is indeed hilarious though
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Dunno. Poor sunny has already felt the emotional and mental side affects of attraction every time Jenny thought of Maria, and that's enough scarring the child for me. I'm not gonna write that sort of awakening for a kid, so I guess that's up to your headcanons.
Good chapter, I'm excited for what's to come
I'm kind of surprised that no-one is reacting to the reveal that Sunny killed at least one Kiren and that is why she and smoky left their village.
I wonder if the villagers will try to extradite Sunny to carry out her sentence?
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Fair point. Better just leave it at the hilarious agonized gay spicy horse noises and let the kids be kids while they can
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bitter traumatic justice! those poor girls... i hope the chimera went slowly on him then scattered the bones! wow that a lil to dark of me backing off...
hng my heart
11194683 Except for protein and fats. Potatoes are low in protein (9.5 grams dry weight), about 1/4 that of soybeans) and essential fatty acids (they have negligible levels of any fatty acid).
The RDA for protein in 50g, so you'd need to eat 500 grams of DRY potatoes every day... as hydrated spuds, we're talking 3-4 POUNDS of them every day. And you'd still get virtually no fatty acids.
They're also fairly low in calcium and sodium, but have all other required minerals.
They are low in Vitamin A (only 10 IU out of the roughly 5000 needed, similarly low in beta-carotene. Also not very good for vitamin E.
Another important point is that their vitamins C and B6 content drops quite a bit after cooking, and eating them raw is generally not an option due to the glycoalkaloids like solanine in the raw potato, which are reduced from cooking.
A dairy product added to them, like butter or cheese, would provide all the fatty acids and additional protein. Some type of green vegetable or fruit is needed for the additional vitamins A and C.
In fact, that was the basic staple diet of the Irish before the Potato Famine, and it was supplemented with cottage greens from the gardens and wild plants, and often eggs. At that time, the Irish were one of the healthiest populations in Europe.
You can survive on nothing but potatoes for a while if you had a balanced diet beforehand... but after about 6 months, the deficiencies will begin to produce pathological symptoms. Sooner if you have no source of sodium other than spuds.
Also, don't eat GREEN potatoes (those that grew partly above the soil surface and produce chlorophyll in the skin), as they have 10 to 20 times the glycoalkaloid levels of a potato that grew totally underground. The only way to safely eat those is deep-frying them to a crisp with oil heated to at least 335F (170C)... basically make fries or chips out of them... which will drop the solanine levels substantially.
This has been your biology note from the resident mad scientist!
I just picked up this story and got caught up.
I have to say that this is certainly one of the best written HiE stories I've read and definitely the most unique.
The mix of cute, tragic, irreverence, sense of family, fantasy, magic, and world building while still being coherent and enthralling is truly amazing.
Your characters are fleshed out and their reactions feel real.
I want Jenny to overcome her addiction. I want Sunny to face her past. I want Noi to have a big sister. I want to see what happens next!
Bravo @Jinzou
Great story and thank you for posting.
Um... wha??? That's... that's horrible!
Oh, you have no idea how often I've thought about what would happen if I were able to go back and redo my life. It's one of those things that you have to curb, because it's not overly healthy to wish for something that will never happen. Regrets suck, but they help you to learn and grow.
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Point taken. Withdrawn.
I love this story
As soon as Jenny asked if Noi wanted her to sing a lullaby all I could think of was this. This would have made the nightmares much, much worse.
In that confrontation I don't think Jenny was entirely right there. For Smoky to move them away from the village and try to fix Sunny's mind seems like an entirely reasonable course of action, just how she went about it doesn't seem so smart. Also Smoky can't seem to make up her mind as to what Jenny is. Smoky alternates between referring to Jenny as something external/real and imaginary.
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Smokey is a confused teenager herself.
Did you have to?
Wait, did Sunny kill someone or get someone killed on accident in a fit of anger and fear? I'm sorry if that was meant to be obvious or not, just trying to comprehend what the broken promise meant. (Also, if yes, please don't let it be Autumn Blaze!)
These kids are so adorable I'm getting diabetes
awww too cute two thumbs up
A bit confused. You said autumn blaze is the new shaman. But then later refer to the shaman as a he?
I really don't get what Jenny's beef with Golden is.
Mmmhh, I don't know how to put this, but the story just doesn't hit it for me. I've stuck this far because the interactions between Jenny and Sunny was really interesting, and I was wanting to see her improve, but I dunno. Aside from the wild fluctuations from the early chapters, the story after that just... petered out, I guess? There were good chapters and mid chapters, but it fluctuates really wildly, and I'm just not feeling it.
I have to drop this down here. Been a wild ride, and I can really see the appeal, but ultimately it's just not my cup of tea. Best of luck for new readers, and don't scroll down for you might find spoilers.