• Published 11th May 2020
  • 22,611 Views, 1,055 Comments

You're a demon (Apparently) - Turtwig-Tales

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Chapter 15

The car’s engine sputtered and choked as you pulled into the parking lot. It may be a near-deathtrap made of mostly rust, second-hand parts, duct tape, and probably a bit of gum, but it still worked. It wasn’t anything special, but it got you from place to place.

It had been…Geez, had it been an entire year since you got back? The back landing in your own world had been…unpleasant. You ended up in the middle of bum-fuck-nowhere, with a massive headache. You wandered around in a daze for hours before passing out near a dirt road. Fortunately, a passing car had found you, and you woke up in a hospital the next day. You had been declared missing and presumed dead long ago, so the police had a lot of questions for you, especially why you had multiple fractures that showed signs of professional medical aid. You managed to bullshit and excuse of knowing basic first aid and had set your own bones. When asked where the hell you were, you told them you had been kidnapped by a fanatical anti-government group, managed to escape, and had wandered around for god knows how long looking for civilization. Which wasn’t a total lie, just one of omission. They seemed to buy it, which was a relief. Adding the parts about alternate dimensions, talking horses, chaos gods, and all the rest would likely end up with you being fitted for a very uncomfortable jacket and a padded cell.

Truth be told, you had had your doubts if what had happened was real. Everything after you fell through that sidewalk so long ago felt like a dream. Was Equestria real, or just some fever dream? Your injuries were very real, that was for sure, you just weren’t sure how they had happened. Even now, it felt like you were still dreaming. As if you were going to wake up in that damn circle again, listening to Father ramble on and on. Or maybe wake up in some other dimension, maybe some ironic equivalent to Hell. Or one where everyone had a funny mustache and talked backward or something equally stupid. After talking horses, anything was on the table.

The only proof you had that it had all happened you had found in your pocket after leaving the hospital. A makeshift necklace with a heart-shaped leaf suspended in millennia-old tree sap. You weren’t sure when Amber had slipped it to you, but you were happy she did. It gave you some solace knowing there was some proof that you hadn’t completely lost your mind. You never took it off.

You not being batshit insane wasn’t the only good news. Since you got back, you’d been…lucky. Like, really lucky, at least compared to Equestria happened. Your old boss, ever the cold-hearted bastard, had replaced you almost immediately. However, your ‘miraculous story’ had generated a bit of a media buzz with a few interviews, which in turn ended up leaving you with a respectable royalty check. It was enough to buy a decent fully-furnished apartment, and the rust-caked chariot you now drove, but it couldn’t last forever. Recently, you had been approached by a kind-hearted woman claiming to be a principal to a nearby high school. Apparently, they needed a new janitor after the previous one had quit. According to her, there had been some sort of issue with a student, who lost her shit after losing some beauty pageant or whatever six months prior. She set off a bomb that hit a gas line and did major damage to the building. Your predecessor had taken one look at the damage and said, quote ‘Fuck this shit, my back’s too old for this.’

Thankfully the cleanup had already happened, and reconstruction was underway. The only thing you were needed for was basic janitorial work. It may not be the most glamorous work, but it was a fat paycheck. That had raised a red flag, but your employer had explained that she wanted someone who would be ‘discreet about oddities.’ which is why she claimed she hadn’t been able to fill that position thus far. When you asked about what she meant, she just smiled cryptically and handed you your large ring of keys. Eh, if all you had to do was keep the place clean and your mouth shut for the biggest paycheck you had ever gotten, then so be it. As long as it wasn’t something illegal or whatever, you could handle anything. With the good fortune you’d had recently, maybe the universe or was trying to make up for all the near-death experiences? Whatever the reason, you weren’t going to complain.

It was your first day on the job. Or night as it were. Most of your shifts were in the evening, which wasn’t that bad. Your Equestrian escapades had really fucked up your sleep schedule. With a turn of the key, the engine sputtered to a stop. As you stepped out of your car, you surveyed the building. The front of the building was covered in plywood and tarps, and the front lawn was marred by a huge crater. Thankfully, whatever bomb the crazed bitch had missed the schools’ iconic statue: a horse, majestically rearing up. At that moment you connected the dots to Amber’s last vision. Everything she said was here.

You sighed and started towards the school, your keys jingling as you walked. Amber had been on your mind almost constantly since you got back. The same questions had plagued you: What could have been? Could you have had a future with her?

Did you…love her?

It was hard to come to terms with. Ordinarily, a human dating a horse would be…weird, to say the least. However, she was an intelligent being, so maybe it was closer to dating an alien? That was a little better, you guessed. Didn’t help so much with the deep, gnawing sense of longing. All those breakup songs suddenly made a lot more sense.

Another sigh. It wasn’t as if figuring out those questions and your own hang-ups about species would do you much good. Amber was lost to you, and you’d never see her again. You supposed that, over time, you’d move on. At least, maybe you’d get used to the pain.

Not too far away, you could see lights dancing in the sky. You remembered the school was doing some music festival or something tonight. Whatever band was playing right now was good, despite being nearly out of earshot. It was low, almost…hypnotic, like the words were beckoning you to come closer. Maybe you’d stop by after you finished for the night if they were still going at that point.

As you got closer, you noticed a figure in front of the school.

Odd, you thought, shouldn’t be anyone here this late.

The figure was definitely a woman, slender build, slightly shorter than yourself. Her skin looked to a kind of pale blue in the encroaching darkness She was facing away from you, so you couldn’t see her face behind her…sea-green hair.

Something’s…familiar about her. Can’t quite place it…

The woman was wearing a simple brown hoodie with jeans and sneakers. She was stumbling around, almost falling over several times. Was she drunk or something? Whatever the case, you guessed it was probably part of your job to keep away people who weren’t supposed to be here. Might as well make start earning your pay.

“Hey, you!” you called to the mystery woman. “You can’t be here!”

The woman froze with an audible gasp. She slowly turned around to meet your gaze…



With her molten copper eyes.



“…Master…?” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

You couldn’t believe it, but there was no way you could mistake that voice.

“…Amber…? Is that…really you…?”

She nodded, tears welling in her eyes. You felt a bit of wetness on your face.

Her steps were wobbly as she tried to rush towards you, almost falling over again. You managed to dart over catch her before she hit the pavement. The position you found yourselves in was… interesting. For a long moment, you stayed like that, just staring into each other’s eyes. Then Amber smiled and broke down in cry-laughter that would have been gross on anyone else. On her, it was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen, and you couldn’t resist holding her close as you joined in.

It was a long time before you let each other go. Neither of you wanted to be the first as if the other would disappear as soon as you did. Eventually, you pulled apart enough to look her in eyes.

“How…?” you asked “How are you here? And…and you’re…?”

“A human?” she finished with a smile. “It’s a long story, but Princess Twilight found a portal that led here. I may have…borrowed it.”

“But…But if you’re here, then…Can you be here? Won’t everything get all fucked up again?”

Amber hugged you tighter.

“I don’t know everything about how this works. What I do know is that this doesn’t work the same way as…his summoning worked.” She grimaced at the mention of the name. “The circle that brought you to Equestria was…unnatural. But the portal is like a…tunnel, I think is how she described it. Princess Twilight found it a few months ago, and she’s made several trips here and back again without any problems. I saw her go in so I…” she blushed “May snuck into her library to use it.”

“Well, I guess that-Wait, Princess Twilight? Since when?”

“That’s…a long story. The short version is that she fixed some old spell, grew some wings and now she’s the Princess of Friendship.”



“…Huh…”

Amber giggled.

“Yeah, that was about how I reacted. Everypony else just seemed to accept it like it was nothing. They’ve been great to me, but they’re a bunch of weirdos.”

Her laugh was music to your ears. You couldn’t think of anything greater sound than that. One of your hands drifted to her head and began scratching. It was a bit different than before, she still happily leaned into it.

“So, how long can you stay here?” You inquired, still a bit nervous about potential metaphysical murder attempts.

“I…I don’t think there’s a limit. The portal only opens every so often, but I don’t think there’s a limit to how long someone can stay in one world or the other. The first time Twilight came here was after an old student of Celestia’s stole her Element. Apparently, she’s been in this world for several years, and she’s not dead yet so…I think I’m okay to stay here as long as I want.” She looked at you with large hope-filled eyes. The implied question was obvious.

You thought it over. The apartment you were in could certainly house two people. Your paycheck probably had enough excess to support her. Getting Amber a job would be difficult, with her being a literal illegal alien. That would be the hardest thing to deal with, especially if the government started looking into her. Maybe you could track down that pony Amber mentioned?

These questions could be dealt with later. They all had a solution, if temporary. When it came down to it, there was only one question that really mattered:



Did you want to have Amber in your life?



That was an easy answer.



“Of course. You can stay as long as you want.” You answered as you hugged the pony-turned-human tight, to which she responded in kind. Her happy tears were forming a sizable wet spot growing on your shirt.

After a long moment, you moved to get up. Amber tried to stand as well, but again wobbled and almost fell before you caught her.

“Heh, I’m still not used to this new body.” She laughed. After a pause, she blushed and shyly met your eyes. “So…what do you think? My new body, I mean…”

Your face went red.

“I…You…look good.” You stammered “You look great! N-Not that you didn’t look good before, it’s just that-“

The soft feel of her lips on your own mercifully cut your dumbfounded rambling short. It caught you off guard at first, but after a moment you leaned into it. The music from the festival thing had gotten a lot quieter, and you thought you could hear a soloist. After a moment, it started to get louder as more sounds joined it like the world was giving you two a moment all to yourselves before erupting into a celebration. It kind of made You wanted this moment to last forever.

A lot of those moments recently.

As you pulled apart you stared into each other’s eyes. You swore you felt a little spark of…something. Magic, maybe, as cliché as it sounded. Ah, fuck it, who were you to dismiss something like that? After being sucked into another dimension entirely, you’d believe just about anything at this point.

“So, what happens now?” Amber whispered.

The reason you were here in the first place suddenly came back to you.

“Well for the moment, I’ve got a job to do. Need to clean this school. After that…maybe dinner?”

“I’d love to try human food!” she hugged you tighter “I’m so happy I found you again!”

“Me too Amber.” A thought struck you. You slipped a hand into your shirt and pulled out the necklace. “By the way, I found this in my pocket. Any idea how it ended up there?”

“Em, well, about that…” she answered with a blush as you slipped the trinket around her neck. “I…just wanted you to have something to remember me by, Master.”

“As if I could forget. By the way, you know you don’t have to call me that right? I think we’ve established I’m not a demon, nor your ‘master.’”

Amber smiled shyly.

“Oh, I know. I started suspecting it after the Diamond Dogs. Saving me from a pack of teeth and claws isn’t something a demon would do. Now when we first met, I was convinced you were some soul-eating horror from beyond the veil. After, though, I figured out pretty quick that I was only half right on that.”

“Then, why…?”



“Well…I don’t think you’ve ever told me your real name.”



“…Really?”

She nodded.

“Yep. No clue. To be fair, we had a lot more important matters at the time, so I guess it just never came up.”

“…Huh, now that you bring it up…Come to think of it, why didn’t anyone else ask? Twilight, the Princesses, Discord? Father I get, but no one bothered to ask my name? I’m feeling kinda insulted if I’m honest.”

Amber held your arm tightly for support as you guided her shakily to the school.

“To be fair, most of them were trying to stop the world from trying to kill you. And Discord…he’s kind of a dick.”

“Such language! What happened to my sweet little Amber? Those ponies have corrupted your once pure soul! And they called me a demon!” you gasped in mock-drama. Amber giggled. In all honesty, you were glad she was more confident. Guess without you around to latch onto helped her think for herself. Maybe for the first time in her life, now that you thought about it. You planted a kiss on her head, and she sighed contently.

“So what it?” she asked.

“What is what?”

“Your name!” Amber exclaimed with a playful slap to your chest. “I think after all we’ve been through, I should at least know what to call you!”

“Fair enough. Well, Amber Gaze, my name is-“

Your much-belated introduction was cut short by a loud BOOM, followed by a rainbow blasting into the sky. After a moment, an immense ethereal alicorn with a rainbow mane descended from the clouds. It reared up and shot a rainbow laser at something you couldn’t see. The impact caused a blinding, massive fuck-off explosion. It only lasted for a few minutes, but it was quite a spectacular sight. It left the two of you were left speechless.



After a moment of staring into the sky in stunned silence, you managed to find your voice.



“…Let’s go inside.”

“Good idea.”

With her arms wrapped around one of your own, the two walked into the building, hoping whatever just happened wasn’t an indication of whatever your future together held. You’d had quite enough magic shit trying to kill you, thank you very much. It’s not like you deserved any of it.


After all, it’s not like you were a demon or anything.

Author's Note:

Well...There we go. I think this is a good a place to leave things as any. I...didn't this would blow up as big as it did, and I just want to thank everyone who followed our perpetually-nameless hero.

After almost a year in the making, it's over. This is, by far, the longest fic I've done to date. One thing that struck me is how the tone changed from how I originally intended. When I first started, I was thinking this was going to a silly little adventure. And, well, we all know how that turned out.

But I'm happy with this, and I'm glad it was received so well! Now, I return to my slumber. I have a few ideas for short one-offs (and maybe a sequel or two?), but I'm taking a break for a while.

Comments ( 125 )

I would like a new story where it's like. A few months later and amber finds out she can use amgic

so if he went to visit equestria would he become a pony?

Good ending for a good story. Kinda hurried and contrived, you made it work though. Thanks for sticking it out!

You never took it off.

Might as well make a start earning your pay.

You managed to dart over to catch her before she hit the pavement.

she blushed “May have snuck into her library to use it.”

Of course. You can stay as long as you want.”

“So what is it?” she asked.

It left the two of you were left speechless.

I...didn't know this would blow up as big as it did,

Alright, that's it everyone. You don't have to go home but you can't stay here!

Quite the calm ending, rainbow explosions aside.

This is a good end to your story. I like how you fixed "the world will end" problem and still hooked the characters up. And if the need really strikes them (you never know) they could go back to equestria without threatening the end of the world. Glad you wrote this nice little story ^^

Very nice ending!
Love that Anon and Amber, got back together. Wonderful story. Great job!:moustache:

Need someone who's discrete and I know you can be :trollestia: , you'd think he'd notice who his new bosses were

Glad this has a happy ending

That was a nice ending!

Oooo you make me twitch at that name tease, I applaud it, really I do.

...so close.

I friggin love happy endings!
Always loved this story, kinda sad to see it end, but wow! that ending! Amazing!

10738931
I agree, It would be interesting to see the EQG main six try to hide they know about the "pony" world and magic around the Demon, who is a Janitor now apparently, and only for him to watch them with a smug look.

10739044
As soon as he knows thier names he's just onna sit there with a shit eating grin "hehe...twilight's dragon is a dog..."

I did not regret reading this. :twilightsmile:

Thanks for all the effort you put into this story, great work. :ajsmug:

I loved this story, shame it had to end.

10739050
"... So how're you doing?"
"Ruff!"
"I'm sorry to hear that."

Glorious
Praise the author

Nice for them to have closure. Though I admit to this ending differently than expected. While reading this over the past year, yes the love between them was very clear, but it never struck me as romantic love. Rather it seemed more...not quite familial, but almost. Not that she was like a daughter, exactly, but more like, just the love without the context. Two souls brought together by circumstance who found both solace and joy in togetherness. It's possible to love a beautiful sunset or a movie or a cat without wanting to date these things. Their love seemed to me to be of that sort.

As to the ending, while yes, it is nice for them to have closure and it's certainly heart-warming to see them both find happiness, I think most of us were expecting that the previous chapter would be the halfway point of the story, with the second half being a complete reversal of roles, where the pony would find herself in human lands for a change.

Still, it was a nice ending. Thank you for it. :raritywink:

That was a great story and a great ending! Thank you for posting this story. It was a really fun read!

You know if you wanna carry on the "nameless human" or "discount anon" schtick, you should have Amber refer to him by pet names in the sequel. I'll let you decide what pet names to use.

That was a cute ending to a nice story.

Recently, you had been approached by a kind-hearted woman claiming to be a principal to a nearby high school. Apparently, they needed a new janitor after the previous one had quit. According to her, there had been some sort of issue with a student, who lost her shit after losing some beauty pageant or whatever six months prior. She set off a bomb that hit a gas line and did major damage to the building. Your predecessor had taken one look at the damage and said, quote ‘Fuck this shit, my back’s too old for this.’

Thankfully the cleanup had already happened, and reconstruction was underway.

HOLD UP. Da :yay: That's EQG 1!! :rainbowlaugh:

The position you found yourselves in was… interesting.

:pinkiehappy:

----

That ending!

:heart::heart::heart:

Also, universal proximity and a mirror portal to help the transfer explains why he was chosen, etc!

------

Typos:

schools’ > school's

made You > made you

so...
sequel?

10739101
I could see the humour in that

I could also see the sequel just being a collection of individually contained stories of him putting up with the EQG Mane 7 and their BS, but never directly letting on that he knows.

10739091
I thought about it, but I was getting kinda burnt out on this. Better to end it on a high note rather than force it longer, right?

10739050
Hmmm...[/i:rainbowderp:
10739101
HMMM...
10739131
That is a distinct possibility.

It was your first day on the job. Or night as it were. Most of your shifts were in the evening, which wasn’t that bad. Your Equestrian escapades had really fucked up your sleep schedule. With a turn of the key, the engine sputtered to a stop. As you stepped out of your car, you surveyed the building. The front of the building was covered in plywood and tarps, and the front lawn was marred by a huge crater. Thankfully, whatever bomb the crazed bitch had missed the schools’ iconic statue: a horse, majestically rearing up. At that moment you connected the dots to Amber’s last vision. Everything she said was here.

Wait a god damn minute.

It was a long time before you let each other go. Neither of you wanted to be the first as if the other would disappear as soon as you did.

It was a miracle already that Amber traveled alone and found his workplace. I guess love really conquer all.

Your much-belated introduction was cut short by a loud BOOM, followed by a rainbow blasting into the sky. After a moment, an immense ethereal alicorn with a rainbow mane descended from the clouds. It reared up and shot a rainbow laser at something you couldn’t see. The impact caused a blinding, massive fuck-off explosion. It only lasted for a few minutes, but it was quite a spectacular sight. It left the two of you were left speechless.

Don't tell me Rainbow ascended as well? Or Celestia pulled a prank on human world?

10739136
Something funny to go with that would be if the ponies overhear her call him one of the petnames and think that is his real name. This leads to them calling him that.
"What kind of name is Honey Bunches for a demon?"

This was just so...beautiful.

This is a bit of a deus ex machina...but it is well written enough that I can still enjoy it.

10739185
Why would they assume that he's a demon when they're human?
Unless they FIRST hear Amber call him one as an in-joke pet-name.
Could be a good kick-off to the first chapter.

*tears up*
This was a very very awesome story you just did.
Have my upvote and follow

10739201
I pictured it as someone like Rainbow Dash or a background pony. Dash is someone who tends to tune out Twilight when she lectures. The background ponies wouldnt be in the loop for the newest info. Unless Twlight did a Press Conference when she got back after the first visit to Canterlot High.

10739181
Ending of Rainbow Rocks, the sirens getting Friendship stomped.

Very lovely.
Celestia is being manipulative again...

10739181
10739242
Which means his workplace is Canterlot High. So...finding his workplace was basically "go through the portal and be there when he shows up".

Ich await ein sequel.

This was ein very gut story.




Also, du get eine follow.

Fuck it. I'm going to remember this anon as "Jeffery".

Love this story and the ending was great. So glad that Amber and Anon got back together at the end.

...Oh how beautiful. Love this. 10/10. This story is freaking amazing, thank you for having written it.

Now you have to do the sequel. At least a one off that is the sequel. I can see it now, he returns through the mirror and comes out a griffin.

That was unexpected and adorable. I hope there's a sequel for shenanigans and sweet things to happen :twilightsmile:

What's this? The human actually goes back to Earth? No dumb contrivances to force him to stay in Equestria? There's only one way to deal with stories like this: straight to the favorites.

I think it was all very well resolved until Amber showed back up. She just doesn't seem like a good fit for him, and their relationship never seeled to really be a good one to me. There just wasn't any real ROOM for it to actually be romantic, instead just an unhealthy obsession with him and never treating him like a person instead of some monster that owns her.

What a lovely ending. Very well done.

That’s a great way to wrap it up. If you decide to follow up in a new story, that’s great, but in its own, the ending is solid too.

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