Fluffiest Misadventures

by tranhdxrbntd

Chapter 6: Cold Blooded

A trio of royal guards, composed of a bat pony night guard and two earth pony day guards, followed the diplomat's trail to the Canterlot Central Park (not to be confused with the Central Park of Canterlot), and entered it, immediately being hit with an ocean of cold temperature and wind chill. The second of the thestrals had gone back to Canterlot Castle to fix the mix up with the Yakutian while the third of the day guards was dealing with the knocked out night guard.

"Mother of Celestia, it feels like I'm gonna freeze my teats off!" cried one of the day guards.

The bat pony flared out her nostrils. "We wouldn't have had to follow him into a winterized park if a certain day guard hadn't of tried a sideswiping takedown maneuver," the bat pony said while glaring at one of the two day guards, specifically the one who had tried the sideswiping takedown maneuver on the Yakutian.

The day guard being addressed, squared up to the bat pony, pushing her forehead against the mare and pushed her back. "Oh buck off!"

The night guard shoved back, matching the day guard's shove. "Like tartarus if you think the widdle earth pony who couldn't knock down the big, tough stallion, thinks she can shove me into a corner!"

The thestral was about to catch the earth pony's hooves when the second of the day guards forced her way in between the two. "Save it for the cheap motel! We got a lost colt to find!"

The two backed off while the third went into the disturbed snow trail that the diplomat had left behind. The day guard followed her, lining up behind the first day guard, and then the night guard entered last. However, the thestral immediately found that walking through the snow proved quite the physical challenge. "Is this supposed to feel like this?" It felt like a water treadmill, only harder and colder.

The lead mare snorted. "Try being up front!"

The thestral smirked. "Buck this!" She flared out her wings and took to the air. Unfortunately for her, the park's air was significantly colder than the rest of Canterlot's air due to snow clouds up above. This created a huge, constantly shifting, air current that made it nigh impossible to fly except for the most skilled of fliers. She immediately lost all of her altitude and dropped back down to ground level, hovering barely above the snow. Making things worse, she found that hovering this close to the ground created a metaphorical tornado of cold wind chill around her, making it feel a thousand times colder. It didn't help that her metal armor was doing a great job of being a heat exchanger.

The two day guards was about to lynch the night guard for increasing the wind chill of that area by several magnitudes when the thestral landed behind the two, lining up with them. "Nevermind," said the thestral meekly. The two day guards smirked at the bat pony, bathing in the schadenfreude.

-X-X-X-

It had taken a while but the three royal guards had followed Snowball's trail to, strangely enough, the park's large frozen lake. It left the trio chilled to the bone and more tired than any of them had felt in their entire life. They had also found out that the thestral's natural bat echolocation was rendered moot because all of the surrounding snow dampened a lot of the sound, leaving them to do this the old fashioned way.

They thought they would have caught up to the Yakutian by now. For Celestia's sake, he was a diplomat! Usually, their kind weren't very physically active and the three of them were trained royal guards of the crown's army! He was also supposed to be facing the more physically demanded challenge, making the initial trail in the snow that they were following!

Here, at the frozen lake, there were several benches that, after being cleared of the snow, proved to be decent places to rest their tired flanks. It was a good moment of respite as they were figuring out what to do. Once they got to the lake, there were several other paths through the snow throwing off their hunt. Being a major park, obviously, other ponies would be making their own paths through the snow. "How in the buck have we not seen him yet!" demanded the night guard. One of the day guards, thinking back to when she impacted the stallion's legs in the failed attempt of a takedown maneuver, thought of how hard his leg muscles had felt like. He could have been tensing his muscles at the time but even then, it was impressive, having felt like solid stone!

"Oh, hello!"

All three royal guards scrambled to their hooves in surprise, not noticing that a yellow pegasus stallion had trotted over to them, his hoof steps having been muffled by the snow covering the ground. He had a dark grey bat pony beside him and trailing behind the two of them, were six little fillies and colts. All eight of them were wearing heavy winter clothing (winter booties, scarves, beanies, and vests those lucky bitches) and a few of the foals were enjoying ice cream cones (bucking what? With this weather?!).

The stallion tilted his head at the trio. "Is there something we should be worried about?" he asked quizzically.

The night guard cleared her throat. "A-hem. No sir, we're just looking for a lost stallion."

The stallion's wife grabbed her stallion's foreleg with a hoof. "See honey, I told you!"

The stallion smiled back at his wife. "Well you never know! It might be unlikely but I betcha meeting a diplomat is rare!"

All three of the royal guards' ears perked up. "Did you say meeting a diplomat?" asked the night guard.
.
Long explanation short, somehow, the diplomat they were after had decided to interact with this small family of ponies, without causing any issues. The two day guards thought back to their original orders, thinking about the reports of a crazed stallion. What had changed?

The three of them were also all pointed in the direction of where to head next, in terms of trying to track down the stallion. He was headed straight for Canterlot Castle! From this spot at the frozen lake, the diplomat's trail was a straight line going there. Better yet, it meant that they didn't have to keep trudging through snow and could just leave the frozen hell scape that was this park and go to the general area of where'd he be once his path would be leaving the snow.

Unfortunately for the three royal guards, once they had gotten to the general area of where the path would end in the snow, they found that he had already left the park. Worse yet, his trail was already partially snowed back in, meaning that he had long since left the area and gained a huge lead away from them. They had assumed that they would have ample time in catching up to the Yakutian as he would be taking the slow path, ie making his own path and trudging through the heavy snow.

If only they had known that Yakutians traveled through body deep snow for basically half of their active life. If anything, Yakutians were faster when trudging through snow.

-X-X-X-

Snowball stared at the massive building known as Canterlot Castle. Lots and lots of mares were guarding it.

Comments

[artofwar77]

Snowball stared at the massive building known as Canterlot Castle. Lots and lots of mares were guarding it.

He's reached the last stage.
Then onto the final boss.

[Viper Pit]

Solid premise but with the short chapters and the over simplification of the ponies it has no real weight behind it for me at least.

[shadow wolf1573]

Nice

[SorryLamp]

How'd the family know Snow was a diplomat? He basically didn't say a word to them.

[The_Fact]

11363655
Well in the previous chapter, he showed a diplomatic scroll.

[SorryLamp]

11364205
It didn't say anything about him being a diplomat, though. Just that he had received a personal invitation, which is not something diplomats get as part of their job. A personal invitation is an invitation you get outside of your job function, it is an invitation intended for you personally - not as an invitation for you as a diplomat. Reading back on it now, I think the author might have meant it as "the princess personally invited him" and not "the princess sent an private invitation to him".

I mean, surely the princess sends out other kinds of invitations, too? I feel like they would specify what kind of invitation it is.

I might be overthinking though.

[The_Fact]

11364614
Yeah, I read it back, it is an invitation. Though it may be put out to the representative of his people rather than personalized to Snowball, so that may be why he is called a diplomat regardless of a lack of information. I imagine a strange pony with unique items and appearance will be treated as a diplomat if he has an invitation to the castle anyways.

[Vaalintine]

There really isn't any reason to go to the castle at this point, since if the ponies that have been attacking him are the ones who invited him then doing so would be just allowing others to harm him.

[SayuriCeleste]

when he fights a bunch of palace guards, so this should play there >>>>

Mare Slayer

[StarzGecko]

11371393

While we know Slayer’s job is to Rip and Tear the demons of hell till the job is done. Our pony Snow’s job is to Smash and Buck all mares till he gets to his destination.

[StarzGecko]

11358706
I completely agree

[bluerock66]

I find this story interesting and funny. love the role reversal of the classic cliché of fondling then getting decked.

[Darth Ponyhilos]

11382039
I completely agree! (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

[Hoshizora]

Hello, yes, I’m here to leave a comment on the most important part about this fic:

The word length of each of your chapters are even multiples of 250 and I appreciate that attention to detail.

[StarzGecko]

11371561
rip video

[PonyDragon]

followed the diplomat's trail to the Canterlot Central Park (not to be confused with the Central Park of Canterlot)

What's the difference?

Long explanation short, somehow, the diplomat they were after had decided to interact with this small family of ponies, without causing any issues. The two day guards thought back to their original orders, thinking about the reports of a crazed stallion. What had changed?

The family treated him nice. That may had made make a difference.

Snowball stared at the massive building known as Canterlot Castle. Lots and lots of mares were guarding it.

Whether that's good or bad remains to be seen.

11362731

He's reached the last stage.
Then onto the final boss.

Now I want to see Snowball kicking the living daylight out of Celestia!