• Member Since 6th Sep, 2012
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The 24th Pegasus

Author of the Commander Hurricane series (A Song of Storms), co-founder of the Price of Loyalty universe, and overall world building fanatic. Join my discord!


Twilight has a problem on her hooves. An hour before Celestia was supposed to come to Ponyville for the Summer Sun Celebration, she's accidentally gone and killed everyone dead. As in, "dead as a doornail" dead. Now she's got to fix it before Celestia shows up and finds out.

Or, at the very least, make sure that Celestia doesn't know that they're dead.

Blame Blueshift for this.
Now with a sequel!
Now with a reading, graciously provided by Skijarama!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 110 )

You maniacs! You actually did it! Damn you! Damn you all to Hell!!!

*Play edgy music*


Well done you bastard.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Oh...my..fucking god...SOOO FUCKING FUNNY.:rainbowlaugh:oh wait i can imagine the smell of mass murder:pinkiesick:

Majin Syeekoh

Okay yeah this is pretty funny

*sigh* twilight... Could you NOT kill all of Ponyville for once. I mean COME ON!!!!!

Nice to see Twilight has her priorities straight (punch stains are very hard to deal with). Good thing for her that Celestia wasn't in a trolling mood that day. Not that Celestia was in much of a mood for anything that day. This kind of reminds me of a DS9 episode too.

Dammit, I can't believe I missed the birth of this glory due to work!

Regardless, this was pretty damn funny.

This was already a hilarious concept, but the extra mile of having Luna with a similar situation involving Celestia made it DOUBLY so. Love it!

Death is an immortality of its own.

It's only when you are immortal that death is more of an inconvenience than a harsh constant.



I kinda saw that coming? but the very end did kind of catch me off-guard, lol. Nicely written!

Yes I made him do a thing, but what is the true cost of this faustian bargain??



'That is why I'm better than Shakesphere.'

More of a close second, actually.

Good thing Luna wasn't as dead serious as Celestia about the whole thing otherwise Twilight would be dead to rights.

If Pinkie had to take care of this situation instead, she'd have called for a corpse party.

I imagine Rainbow's joke was so funny that anyone hearing it would have died of laughter.

Wow, fifteen years to take a course on Necromancy sounds deadly.

The reporters must've been writing quite fast to have their words fliesing about.


This reminds me of that story we mooted where Rainbow Dash accidentally killed Fluttershy while jousting at some kind of Crystal Kingdom faire, and then she had to "Weekend at Bernie's" Fluttershy's corpse through the rest of the episode.

What is this I can't even :rainbowlaugh:

Well, at least Twi and Luna had, in a way, the same idea.
And good thinking there Luna, why look for a solution when you can just wait for someone else with the same (or similar enough) problem to come up with a solution?

It wasn't until the moon-setting and sun-raising scene that I realized what was going on. That really made this story. :pinkiecrazy:


Well, now you have to write it. The meme must flow...

I'm not sure if I should be worried about how much those puns about death made me laugh.

8003225 I thought it was obvious...the instant Luna fixed Celestia's glasses.

Sweet Celestia, I'm actually laughing so hard it's hard to breathe right now...
But wow. Wow. That was really funny. "Calihornia" was a pony pun I wouldn't have expected, and all the darkness taken so lightheartedly is unexpectedly hilarious.
Well done! (And yes, Blue is indeed "greater than Shakespeare" :twilightsmile:)

does this take place before nightmare moon. Because I can totally see nightmare moon showing up and creeped out by mad mare Twilight being all like "it was an accident, I swear."

Meanwhile Cadance is in her room at Canterloy Castle laughing as her plan to be the only true Princess of Equestria unfolds.

t.o.s., while it's nice to see you're still around, you're running those puns into the grave. Still, as long as you've got fresh materiel, I don't see how they could be rotten.
I have to wonder then just what EXACTLY it was that caused them all to spontaneously die. Twilight's already immortal, so why would she try anything that has to do with gaining immortality?

Blueshift! Stop that! (Not really. Keep it up.)

Oh my God. This was hilarious! :rainbowlaugh:

Wait... can't use Rainbow... She's dead...

I knew Luna was hiding something!

And that she knew all of Ponyville was dead XD

And though Luna was many things, first and foremost among them beautiful, mysterious, intelligent, gifted, cunning, resourceful, powerful, lovely,

You forgot modest.

8003724 Yeah, that's about when, but I didn't expect her comment about Twilight bringing them back.

I saw half of that twist coming, but really didn't think Princess Celestia's murderer was Princess Celestia in the dining room with the cake.

Okay, I only noticed when Luna had to quickly help Celestia with her sunglasses.... :rainbowderp::rainbowlaugh:
Unfortunately the only thing marring this delightful story was that Celestia's demise was of her own doing and not something that Luna accidentally did so that Luna and Twilight would've had something a bit more in common than merely doing the puppetized ponies routine.


I like to imagine that while Twilight is investigating how to save them all Discord shows up, pulls all sorts of jokes, but no one reacts and he just has a metaphysical crisis of wondering what he is doing with his life and ends up spending 10 hours telling Mayor Mare's dead corpse about his life.


"Calihornia" was a pony pun I wouldn't have expected

Hurrah, my sole contribution is noticed!

Remeber, her dead corpse is (kinda) laughing. Feel free to use that emoticon. :heart:


The hilarity has been doubled!

Damn it, you got the idea stuck in my head. Now, I have to write it.

I blame Bluesshift for everything that is to come.


Luna is a character in the story. Is it taking place before nightmare moon? No. Think, man!

Definitely Shakespeare story, the body count matches and so does the killer wit.



Brilliant :D
...Now I really want to read more of this!

With that, the chariot once more departed Ponyville, swiftly taking the princesses with it. Twilight smiled and waved as long as the chariot was still in sight, which was an unfortunate amount of time, as it was more or less a straight shot to Canterlot from Ponyville by wing. By the time the chariot faded into the distant background of the capital, Twilight had to use her telekinesis to physically pull the smile off of her face. Sighing, she turned around and looked behind her, where the stench of the dead was really starting to become a nuisance. Her shoulders sagged and she marched back to her castle where she had an army of spellbooks at her disposal to solve the problem. “I knew reading that ‘The Uninomicon and You: A Beginner’s Guide to Immortality’ book was a bad idea. I can’t believe it was in the foals’ section, though. Wonder how it got there…” But like most questions involving anything related to Ponyville’s youth, Twilight simply decided to blame it on Applebloom and her friends and call it a day.


I honestly first thought Luna had turned Celestia into a zombie.

That story had me dying of laughter.

:twilightsmile: Ember was right, I now know why dragons don't do friends.

:trollestia: I do love cake so..........................................

:derpytongue2: Is there a Doctor in the horse?

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