Fixation on death aside, this is lovely —Soge, accidentally describing my entire life
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Warning: Philosophically dark.
A lot has happened since Celestia and Luna disappeared nine hundred years ago. There are no wars, no diseases, no pain, no death. Princess Twilight, Discord, and Spike do everything to ensure that the utopia continues.
But even the most ideal paradises have ponies that wish it wasn't so.
Story inspired by Mister Saugrenu’s artwork 1000 Years in the Future.
Reading by Scribbler Productions
Edited by Soge.
French translation by Anima Draconis.
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I'm of the opinion that if people are absolutely sure that they want to die, let them die. But this has no real world application- in reality, people who commit suicide are making impulse decisions or are suffering from a mental illness and can't make the decision for themselves, and even if neither of those are true, then the risk is still to great that they are to let someone commit suicide.
As for this stallion, I'm of the opinion he should give live's experiences another try before being so adamant that suicide is the only option.
As for Discord's option, it's probably the best, because he pretty much killed the stallion, however he replaced said stallion with another lifeform with an exactly equal entitlement to life who will end up being much happier.
Great story! I'm trying to upvote this but it won't let me...
6341575
That's because of a new site feature. Any story with less than ten votes, up or down, will have its votes hidden from the public.
This is a really interesting concept for a story! Death has always been like a shadow to life, ever-present and frightful as it grows longer over time. While personally I'd love to live forever and never have to worry about what happened to me, I can also see why some people would grow tired of living, especially if everything in a world was 'perfect'.
The one downside I saw is that the story isn't very detailed or (dare I say it?) deep. The plot itself is interesting, but the lead-up to such a point in one's life, the background behind a society of immortals, what circumstances constitute 'life' and 'death', how ponies can/do lead their everlasting lives, the changes following Discord's solution, and so on are all a little too vague to be engaging. If the story were a bit longer, those kinds of questions would definitely be good topics to touch on.
This is a great little story, altogether. Love the Japanese titles too, nice touch.
Saw story, was interested, clicked. Read story, continued to be interested. The premise is--for lack of a better word...--interesting, and even if it's one you found you still did a good job putting it all together. There's no glaring errors, and the writing doesn't make me want to beat my head against the wall, so, success!
But I'm also confused. It feels like a small piece of something much larger, but I can't make out what that larger something is meant to be, and I can't tell if it ended too soon or started too late. Are you exploring a tyranny of benevolence? The nature of death? Of reincarnation? And what of the stallion? It's hard to emphasize with him when we know so little of his life, and with this ending where it does, Discord's solution--a continuation of sorts--still feels like an ending. But, then, maybe that's the point...
Of course, it's also possible I'm over-thinking things...
Regardless, I enjoyed this. Have a like!
6341591
OMG YES, I didn't know that became a feature or when, but I'm glad it's there!
6341671
It was made a feature on 24 July of this year.
Actually if Discord has the heart that I think he has after all of what has happened -- that foal is NOT the petitioner.
It would be EASY for Discord to disguise a reincarnation event.
---
If it is the same pony then the same event may happen and we come back to square one a couple of hundred years down the line.
6341575 6341671
Now the votes are revealed!
>10 upvotes
>1 downvote
And then there's this asshole.
Well then, I expected a...happier ending, or at least Twilight coming around. The ending feels like cheating the petitioner, and as stated this all feels cut from something much larger :/
Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the read, but still...my heart is hollow now.
Very interesting. If someone wanted to get cancer would we call them mentally ill? In a world where mortality is, in principle, optional the right to choose to die seems essential but exercising that right may be a symptom of an ill mind. I think this may be the kind of problem I would want to have.
Very interesting to say the least. I can see this story staring a complex debate in the comments. Although I think it would have been more interesting if Celestia, Luna and Cadendza were there.
Wow
Would have liked to see Twilight's reaction to Discord suddenly pulling that reincarnation bit. But yeah, this was pretty good look at something only our little Twilight could magic up. Especially when paired with Discord's magic.
I wish it would have gone on to eventually reveal why Twilight became so desperate to try and find a 'cure' for death. A nice "I did it, Rarity! I did it! I finally found the—" only to trot in to see Rarity 'sleeping' on her couch. The last of her friends finally passing away. No Luna, no Celestia. And now not even one of her old friends remained beyond Spike and Discord.
You know, something like that. I guess.
It was a nice little dystopian twoshot, but I could help but feel the protagonist was somewhat weak. He didn't have much of a personality other than "I'm sad and I want to kill myself." It's kind of hard to feel for him or the situation that Equestria's in as a result.
Nice story, but a bit hollow overall. It would have been nicer to explore Twilight's intentions behind the whole immortality thing - I get that she's changed but it didn't feel like Twilight. She was just a little bit too cold and organize-y.
Oh.
This was. Dark.
Very well done my friend. This is how you pull a dark fic. So right to my fav-shelf with it. Have an upvote and a moustache for this.
Wow.
Just....
Wow.
I'm astounded at the brilliance of this fic. Keep writing!
Loved the story, but not gonna lie it brought back some of my more personal problems .~.
Still loved that you wrote this :) You're showing the downfall to a paradise that a lot of people want.
I don't think people are afraid of death...they're afraid of what comes after.
Namely, if anything at all comes after. Or if it's nothing but a dreamless sleep, with naught but nothingness waiting beyond the veil of life.
Long have we pondered the existence of gods, of all names and origins, and the possibility of an eternal paradise (or damnation) after we pass from this world. Long have we pondered on a realm beyond our own, although, after so many millennia of civilization, we have yet to show irrefutable proof truly exists. Long have we pondered whether or not there will by anything at all waiting for us after our mortal hearts play their final tunes.
I did always like the Hindu concept of reincarnation, both in philosophy and in context. The promise of a fresh start, in a new body, trying your hand at the game of life once more.
I wouldn't call myself religious, but I don't like the idea of nothing but blackness at the end of the road. And I also don't like the idea of leaving this world behind forever. Death just seems so...final, but life, on the other hand...
Life is full of potential.
Not a bad story, and I do get where it was going.
I just have a hard time feeling for the protagonist.
He comes off as an emo little kid who just wants to have his way. I was kind of hoping for a more intelligent argument from his side of things, but he just came off as pathetic since his arguments were basically "but I don't wanna live anymore, and you can't make me...so there,".
A good idea though.
Hey, guess what? YOU DID IT AGAIN!
anony.ws/i/2015/08/21/EveryponyLivesFeatured.png
6341574
This says a lot about what needs to be said.
6342855
This says more, the protagonist makes no convincing arguments for why he should want to die, he just does and we are told he does.
Statement: I would of happily done as he requested.
HK!!! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO EVERY DARK FIC I READ?!?!?!
Answer: Because I would make them a lot better.
Why did I install that upgrade???
6342695
Agreed. This doesn't read like the logical extension of anything - it's definitely not "show Twilight". Feels more like every other AU grimdark Tyrant Twilight. Maybe it's actually Starlight Glimmer masquerading as Twilight, enforcing Harmony at horn-point! This might have worked better as part of a longer work, where we'd get some background on why Twilight ended up like this, what happened to the other alicorns, and why this pony wanted to die.
I always thought the Time Lords of Gallifrey (or should that be Gallop-Frey) had the right idea. A singular mind or consciousness can only take so much life. You need to be 'refreshed' on occasion if you intend to live for Millennia, so that life doesn't become stale.
But even that would eventually start running up against the limits I think. That episode in the school with the Tenth Doctor, where he tells the alien that he's become tired of giving the benefit of the doubt (or something like that) makes me feel just how mentally old he is, even with a young face.
So yeah, you might be able to make your body immortal, but the mind is another matter, & if you change the mind, are you still you?
I found this story to be delightful. Well done.
Damn, I was all ready to post a big speech about how if he's just so damn tired of being alive and immortal, and no matter what he can't die, then the best thing to do would be to wipe his mind, reset it, let him start over. And then it happens right at the end. Honestly, I kinda gotta agree with Twilight here. It's bad that she's forcing it on her subjects, but she's right about pretty much everything else. And they reached a great solution at the end there.
So those who grow too tired of life will have their minds wiped and be allowed to start all over. No idea why this has the tragedy tag. He got what he wanted in a way, Twilight got what she wanted in a way, and Discord just brought a great solution hundreds would take because it's equivalent to what they want.
6341696
That's assuming he'll become the same person again, which is very unlikely. He may become someone who can handle being immortal much better, or me may become someone who cracks much earlier.
6341574
There are many people who are terminally ill and face nothing but another year or two of great pain if they keep on living. Suicide can be a completely rational choice for them.
Except that reincarnation isn't a compromise between death and life. If you can't remember your former life then prior you is functionally dead, and if you can then all you did was physical mutation.
6342523 Ooh, nice idea.
6343453 I didn't even consider that, but I agree with you completely.
Not everyone has the mental fortitude to handle life eternal. Honestly, even if you're happy to be immortal, there's still the issue of getting bored.
This was awsome and dark. LIKED, FAVED, AND IM FOLLOWING YOU .Good job mate.
~T.CC
Yeah, Twilight would be the one to nonchalantly alter fundamental forces of nature just to fix emotional problems.
Very interesting, Chill. Good to see something new from you.
Great job with the story, I really liked it. Also, what do the titles mean? I would use google translate but I still don't trust it.
Big issue with immortality is stagnation.
6343500 It's just what he wants Twilight to think...
i cannot condone this. while they may have done everything to make everyone immortal. there has to be a limit. food and resources. entertainment. and then theirs the bad side, killers,greedy people. ect. and then theirs just living so long that you just get tired living. even if you make another planet whats to stop you there? what if they continue that over and over again and suddenly they are faced with oh shit theirs aliens and we are invading their territory? even then if theirs nothing whats to stop them from coming into more than one universe? and then they meet a celestia who's disgusted by what twilight has done? death is a natural thing that cannot be interrupted. if it is something horrible might happen. if there is a heaven or hell in this universe you'd bet your ass they would step in to stop twilight. and theirs that thing at the end! wipe their memories and have them live again? i can guarantee that would not work ether, they might just follow in the same footsteps or might come out worse than what the were? not to mention to whole no longer being able to have different babies anymore. no more evolution. no more leaps in technology or art or medicine. death is something that should never be taken away no matter how much it hurts. its just a natural thing. if you make everyone immortal sooner or later those hundreds that dont want to live anymore will start to grow more and more. and you cant really make them babies since you know a few more would be like "WAit! that was my friend why did you do that!?" and yeah doing what Twilight did, that is basically killing him.
My god this is dark. I want to share my opinion on this, but I'll be back later. Too sleepy right now.
This Discord doesn´t sounds like Discord... at all. You should have replaced him for another OC speaking his lines .
6343500
Agreed. See "Death of Personality" from Babylon 5 episode "Passing Through Gethsemane".
Death needs to get his bony ass up and smack a bitch. Like, just straight up strut down that crystal bridge up to Twilight and backhand her.
The moment I saw "Philosophically dark" I knew I would love it. I was right.
6344168 I'm not usually one for slapping a pony, but I guess I'll make an exception.
6344177 I agree with the whole "usually not my thing" bit, but just..... Damn it Twilight. Life simply can't be a thing without Death there too. It's a metaphysical impossibility.
Alrighty then, Twilight.
6342855 well as the story makes clear they've been through this before. How many times can you rehash the same argument?
6343798
無- Nothingness
続- Continuation
such a paradise.
Except for Discord and spike apparently.