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Anonymous, asshole extraordinaire and a rotten egg by all accounts, has fallen on good times after being made a commander of the Storm King's vast armies. With the King's forces and equipment at his fingers, he's found great success conquering nations, sowing chaos, and kicking the asses of all walks of life. All while having a rip-roaring great time doing it.
But the day of the Storm King's biggest conquest to date - the nation of Equestria - looms just around the corner. All that's left now is the final few preparations for the invasion: loose ends to tie up, new weapons to seize, and even some co-commanders to annoy to no end. And once those are complete, Anon will be the first in line to take Equestria as his next conquest.
God help us all.


This isn't the first horse story I've written, but it is the first one that is prose instead of greentext. And I'm still a bit rusty on top of all that. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated!

Chapters (12)
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To escape from Tartarus is nearly impossible, even for one of great magical power. When you've lost your powers and are little more than a withered old centaur, it's even harder. But Tirek has a plan, one that will draw in a creature from a world where life is cheap, hats are plentiful, and gravel is king. Will the Spy take the opportunity to enjoy a well-earned vacation in this new world, or will he see the population of friendly, innocent ponies as just a fresh selection of backs to stab? It could be both!

(Takes place before the beginning of Season 9.)

Chapters (21)
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Anon has been in Equestria for 5 years, working under Celestia as a Minister of Foreign Affairs. His tactics were seen as dishonest at best and unethical at worst. But when Celestia leaves suddenly, she names Anon as her temporary replacement to the throne. With internal bickering over whether Anon deserves this position and heightened tension with the Griffons, Anon must choose carefully. Will he become a tyrant or a fair king? And how far will he go to preserve Equestria?


A fully rewritten version of a greentext I wrote back in 2019. Could be a bit dated with tropes that I thought was good writing at the time, but I’m still proud of it.

For the Second Person tag you should note that sections from Anons POV are in first person, everyone else is in second person.

Romance tag is there because of a romance I included that I think was poorly handled, but half the story wouldn’t make sense if I just removed it so I had to keep it in.

Gore and Violence are self explanatory. It’s not there abundantly, but it is there.

Also don’t read the comments if you don’t want spoilers. Story discussion happens in them and that might ruin the reading experience.

Now on The Good HIE List!


Featured on 1/11/23! Thank you all.
Featured on 1/12/23. Thanks again.
Featured on 1/13/23! Three days in a row? Thanks guys.
Featured on 1/14/23. Four days in a row. Thanks guys, I’m touched.
Featured on 1/15/23. Five days? Holy shit I never expected this guys. Thank you all so much.
Featured on 1/16/23. This makes me wonder if there’s a limit to how many times I can announce a featured slot.
Featured on 2/2/23. Also marks the day I officially finished the story, so hooray.

Chapters (23)
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A human living in Equestria owns a restaurant in Canterlot. Hearth's Warming is approaching. Demand is high.

Life is a series of challenges, and running a restaurant is undoubtedly a big one. Jean does his best as anyone can while dealing with other things that have come into his life as of late.

Chapters (8)
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This story is a sequel to A Noble Death


For the former Spartan Noble Six, life after death no longer holds any mysteries. Finding herself in the aftermath of a war against the changelings that she had brutally finished, Six has to contend with one of the greatest challenges a soldier can face: walking away from war.

Only a month after the Changeling-Pony War ended, another changeling monarch appears in Canterlot. King Phasmatodea of the Fifth Hive, a complete unknown to pony and changeling alike. Battleworn and rich with mysteries, knowledge, and artifacts, King Phasma catches the eye of both the Princesses of Equestria and Six. To the Princesses, he is the ticket to preventing a future war with the changelings. To Six, this King Phasma seems to be more important than any native she has met, for he claims to be something that Six swore she would never see again: another human.


Cover art by Frazy#1225
Written in collaboration with K.K. Slider
Warning this story contains spoilers for the two stories A Noble Death and Changing Expectations
Edited by AlwaysTired and UnamusedWaffle

Chapters (4)
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Isolated from her friends and taken prisoner in the middle of a war, Twilight must deal with the very real dangers of being percieved as an enemy as well as the nightmares of her arrival on 'Earth'. Can she overcome her own fears and the fears of her captors? Will the wayward unicorn's assistance be a boon or a curse to the 'humans?' Most importantly, will she ever find her way home?

"In short, it's a story of friendship and plasma rifles, with the emphasis on the friendship. The characters are well written, the XCOM setting is fleshed out very well, and the story is compelling. If you love XCOM, you'll love the story, but even if you've never heard of it, it's more than worth giving the first 3 chapters a read.

There's excellent action later on, but the real strength lies in the collision between the friendly and naive world of Twilight Sparkle and the desperate world of humans fighting a losing war for survival and willing to do anything to turn the tide."

--Arzoo

(XCOM/FiM crossover)
(Cover art commissioned by a friend and created by the magnificent FoxInShadow!)
(Original cover art by the amazing Carnelian can be viewed here!)
(Gore tag for blood and some violence)
(Many thanks to the studius OminousTen, Arzoo, xXFluttershyForeverXx and finally Setokaiva for giving my rambles a once-over)
(Now with it's own TV Tropes page! Get to tropin' folks!)

Chapters (36)
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My captor was kind, to a point. They provided me with a comfortable private suite, three meals a day, and tried to accommodate any of my needs within reason. It was a far cry from being locked away in a dingy dungeon or straight up killed, but I still was a bit wary about the true intentions of this alicorn. 

A gilded cage, however, is still a cage.

Edited by UnamusedWaffle. and INeedSleep

Thanks to Snuffy for proofreading chapter 9 part 1

Credit to Neither for the amazing cover art!

Chapters (11)
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This story is a sequel to Changing Expectations


When ages are segmented and divided in the annals of history, it is done so with great events as breakpoints. The Second Age of Heroes was unanimously declared to have started with the return of Princess Luna and the changeling Invasion of Canterlot.

For thousands of years, the changelings survived beneath The Great Tapestry, that which connects all living and nonliving things. Hundreds of generations worked endlessly to keep their existence a secret. With one command from Queen Chrysalis, the Masquerade was broken.

In a single night, the changelings waged war against Equestria and took the Kingdom by storm. Months later, the war between changelings and ponies has ended. A new tapestry, a new story, must be woven between the two species. Equestria and the Fifth Hive have gone through a dark chapter and have emerged stronger for it.

One war ends and another begins.

As The Sword of Damocles hangs above the heads of the formerly-human King Phasma and his Equestrian counterparts, the forces of light must work on an ever-shortening window before war once again brings Hell to Equus. Dark powers grow in the places that the light does not reach, and they bring one irrefutable truth.

Epitaph is coming.


Cover art by Nixworld.

Special thanks to my pre-readers!

Chapters (31)
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3/14/24 Still Alive Edition

There's only one pony in Ponyville that the Mane Six have never met. Pinkie Pie has never thrown him a party, Applejack has never sold him a mug of cider, and Twilight has never seen him check out any books. And as far as that unicorn, Lapis Print, is concerned, that's exactly how it should be.

Lapis can't risk them knowing where he lives, what he does for a living, or even what his name is - if he gets his way, the Mane Six won't even know he exists, and nopony in Ponyville will miss him once he's gone.

It should be a piece of cake - after all, it's not like the biggest magical power in Equestria is about making sure everypony looks out for each other, right?

(Rated Teen for language - mental cursing mostly.)

Chapters (19)
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A solar storm is raging across Equestria, the weather is going wild and magic is going haywire everywhere...
...and three fillies are sneaking through the most recent addition to ponyville, Twilight's crystal castle, looking for cool artifacts.

Unluckily for them, they find what they're looking for.


This is my third story, and second halo crossover, on here and I'm going to attempt writing it in first person, criticism is appreciated since first person is hard.

The cover art is made by Johnjoseco, I colored it in.
Source: derpibooru

Hope you guys enjoy!:twilightsmile:

Chapters (27)