- Member Since 22nd Dec, 2012
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
Shakespearicles
The Man. The Legend. The World's Strongest Writer™
Shakespearicles
Joined 22nd Dec, 2012 ·
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Then who was it? I'm confused.
Also, why would she let him fuck her right after he had all those weird chemicals/powders on his cock? Now she has that shit in her pussy. A dick's gonna grow inside of her pussy isn't it? :P
Uh... when a girl says no...
It might be a good idea to mention that there's a little bit of non-consensual action at the top of the chapter. I was fine with the enema part, but this really bordered the line.
Shumshumschilpiddydah!
8162631 Good point.
[added]
8162659 Duly noted. Added a non-con warning.
8162661 8162723
img.gifamerica.com/42e546bd95c3217ae83f32e980d8c71f_rick-and-morty-reaction-gif-rick-and-morty-no-gif_500-272.gif
Sounds interesting.
8162690
It means to kill everything in the end and party like an animal!
31.media.tumblr.com/1974d24435949f62f60420b278da3f75/tumblr_inline_o3dqg15ynj1t6za41_1280.gif
Aaaaaaaand we're back to borderline rape of royalty again. I really recommend adding a warning in the description of the story since it's in more than one chapter.
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+
+
+
=
derpicdn.net/img/view/2016/7/20/1204929__safe_artist-colon-eskerra_shining+armor_twilight+velvet_eyes+closed_implied+incest_incest_infidelity_mother+and+son_nuzzling_one+eye+closed_pr.png
I didn't know asses and pussies can gasp...
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A club huh?
8162760 Apologies. Dub-con warning added to main story description.
"Oh! Uh, don't unwrap it here. It'll ruin the surprise!"
Everyone has his or her own kinks.
If your story involves dark elements, better tag it dark.
8162760
I have no idea what's going on, but now I need to find out because the commentary was damned hilarious.
"Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrright upthebutt!"
Any more story ideas?
8162953 Yes,
elevenfifteen.I have my updated story to-do list on my user page.
Oh my, I wonder what'll happen because of this.
Also, I found a minor typo.
That should probably be plural.
8163037
i390.photobucket.com/albums/oo345/stryke81/MLP/S02E01-animatedapplejackAppleliemacrowhat_are_you_talking_about.gif
8162972 Here's story idea #12: After Big Mac is off the market, Cheerilee feels like she's going to be alone for a long time until Ponyville's own neighborhood dragon Spike leads from comforting her to secret relationship of passion.
Fantastico!
Is she gonna get pregnant with her own son's baby?
Mother's Day clop.
Another example that not every story idea has been done.
1281796?
Anyways, this looks good. Will read.
Happy mother's day I guess.
8163552 Derpibooru
8163577
Oh ok. Can't you link Derpibooru as the source directly?
8163593 You can as long as it's SFW.
8163650
Oh. Right.
I'm a complete moron sometimes.
8163688
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/elderscrolls/images/4/4a/We_Know.png
yep this story is defiantly a keeper.
wow really a jack-hammer really hum interesting.
Lose the comma (maybe), or just lose the comma and "herself". It's a bit repetitive.
You can combine these three into a single sentence if you'd like. It might just make it flow better. No matter what though, you should combine the first two sentences for better grammar:
"She didn't give him a disapproving glare, but neither was it the dull grin of post-coital bliss; her expression was neutral."
You go from calling her "Cake" like how Harry and Draco call each other "Potter" and "Malfoy", to her full name (Cup Cake), and then over to Mrs. Cake. I'd suggest choosing one and sticking with it.
This is getting good quickly. I like it!
100% my favorite line so far.
_____________________________________
*licensed
Capitalize Lotus
Add a period after "release", though that may just be a stylistic choice in this situation.
Remove "all the while", it's very repetitive.
I dunno why my previous comments were for this chapter specifically, I meant for them to be in the overall comments. Oh well.
Damn, this story was great. I've never really read pregnant porn, maybe only once before, but this was pretty good in terms of fetishes. Now I'mma just wait and hope for a sequel.
_____________________________________
Twilight Velvet was either walking or waddling, but probably not both. Seeing as how Cadance is the pregnant one, I'd say change it to:
"She walked over to Cadance, who waddled toward her in the main lobby."
*slice
Lose the comma
De-capitolize (un-capitalize?) "Bits"
Lose the first comma
*the widest part of her hoof (probably)
Ahh yes, the pronoun game. Always fun to play.
*Cadance cried out as Cup Cake sank a hoof up to the elbow into her ass.
*others
*each others' lips
Also, why is that part italicized? Out of all of the things that have happened in this story, some kissing is definitely the most vanilla. Oh well, that's your choice I guess.
Mares just swing all over the place
Well this was certainly different.
8164148 8164161 8164203 Thanks for all of your help!
8165111
you bby
8165140
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I like it. Another!!
Thank goodness I'm guy and don't have to be a mother.
*Reads next line*
Oh thank you, my Lord and might sempai. No scat.
Pneumatic... jackhammer...
Holy crap...
This is officially my 1000th fave story. congrats my friend. I loved this. You always do amazing work. there were a few parts that seemed off, but overall this was fantastic as always.
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This was really good. Loved Cadance's interactions with all the mothers and I liked how you made the acronym for M.I.L.F here something different; I didn't expect that.
Great story you have here!
This is still one of my favorite clop stories. It's hot but also kind of sweet.