• Member Since 8th May, 2012
  • offline last seen 16 minutes ago

Bok


I fooled you. I fooled you. I got horse stories. I got horse stories. I got alllllll horse stories.

E
Source

Twilight Sparkle comes across a small, battered diary detailing a new form of transportation. While the research is sloppy and the notes incomplete, Twilight takes it upon herself to see that the ancient project is completed.

Of course, nopony said it would be easy.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 182 )

// TODO: read this

Edit 2d 23h later: story.read = true;

That was a fun read. :twilightsmile: I want that spell to become Canon and Twi to use it in show, it could lead to either really funny or really awesome moments... I just imagine Twi being charged with it and TPing around the library that way while continually talking to the others, who look a little concerned but interested at the same time...

This sounds like the kind of story that turns into a good adventure.

4350197

Too bad it's completed :/

4350307

We should write our own Twilightning story. With blackjack, and hookers!

Actually, forget the blackjack... and the Twilightning. Actually, just forget the whole thing,. :trixieshiftleft:

More drastic measures were necessary. He sucked in some air and puffed out his chest. "Reading is for nerds!"
Twilight's head instantly whipped away from her book, her face one of shock. "What!?"

HA HA, OH MY SIDES!!

Bok
Bok #8 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·

4350289

Twilightning 2: Electric Boogaloo

Coming this Summer Maybe.

Was this inspired by Rainbow's experiences among the elk in It's a Dangerous Business, Going Out Your Door?

Comment posted by Bok deleted May 7th, 2014
Bok
Bok #11 · May 7th, 2014 · · 5 ·

4351212

I have nowhere near the patience to read something that long.

4351303 :rainbowlaugh: That's unfortunate. It's a great story.

How did you come up with the idea of riding lightning to teleport, then? :rainbowhuh:

Bok
Bok #13 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·

4351326

I wanted to write a "Twilight Tries a New Spell" where the spell itself is the focus of the story, not the resulting disaster of the spell.

Also, because teleporting yourself via transforming into lightning is f*cking metal.

4351212 That was my reaction too. But weren't they pronghorns?

4351408

Also, because teleporting yourself via transforming into lightning is f*cking metal.

As Luna would say, "Verily!" :twilightsmile:

(With an AU tag: I bet some unicorn wrote the book after seeing Luna do it over 1000 years ago)

Turning into lightning to travel?
img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130912181424/onepiece/images/thumb/a/ad/Enel_Anime_Infobox.png/250px-Enel_Anime_Infobox.png
That's my pony!

Liked! A very interesting story, my friend! VERY interesting!

From the description and the name, I was expecting Twilight to be permanently (or close enuff) transformed into a lightning elemental. IE she can shift between solid and electrical form at will (once she learns to control it)

4351408
Riding lightning as a "teleport" is about as metal as you can get

I never would have thought using two ponies to overcharge the spell.

should probably be:

I never would have thought of using two ponies to overcharge the spell.

4351991 :rainbowhuh: Isn't "pronghorn" another name for elk? Or are they a type of deer or sheep? I'm not sure... :applejackconfused:

4352950 An elk is a lot more heavy
i.imgur.com/U4b7KQz.jpg

(/borringbiologystuffthatnobodycaresabout)

Now, after I've polluted the comment section, I guess it's only fair if I give the story a read :twilightsheepish:

You'd think after the fiasco with Star Swirl's last spell, Twilight would have known better than to fool around with incomplete and unidentified magic!

This was a nice little story. Upvote from me

I guess I we won't know until we do a test run."

Remove 'I' or 'we'.

Spike sighed; If there was one thing

Replace semicolon with period or make "if" lowercase (former preferred)

Hmm... lightning-based transportation magic...

I wonder how hard it would be to adapt it to use, say, power lines instead of thunderstorms.
Of course, even as-is Arc Jump could probably bypass most anti-teleportation defenses. It's not exactly subtle about it, but if the alternative is storming the entire Tower of Terror the old-fashioned way, you take what you can get.

I'll have to keep this in mind for when I play D&D. Thanks!:twilightsmile:

4353018 Thanks for showing me the difference! :twilightsmile:

* :facehoof: 's at myself for not knowing before*

What a great story. It would be a pretty good candidate for EQD posting, have you thought about submitting it?

4353387 Clearly what we have here is the makings of a instantaneous travel mass transit system using power lines.

Also, this brings new meaning to buying stuff on the Internet.

once the novelty wears off, you've got a teleportation spell that's way too dangerous, uses way too much energy and assumes permanent cloudy weather

Please, as if the novelty of becoming a living lightning bolt could ever wear off. That's like saying if you ever got bored of the taste of chocolate.

The possibilities for this spell are.......interesting..... :pinkiecrazy::pinkiehappy:

One thing's for sure, you're going to have quite a few authors asking for permission to use this spell in their stories. :twilightsmile:

"Seriously? That's what your going to use?" Spike asked.

you're

Since she also lived in the Badlands, which honestly just added insult to injury.

Remove 'since', or find another way to rephrase it.

"Oh no you don't!" she screamed, grabbing Twilight back legs and charging a spell to finish off the intruder.

Twilight's

"Twilight, why would I be mad at you? You perfected I spell I thought was impossible."

a


Cute story. Would've liked to see Chrysalis get dragged along with Twilight, hit the ground under the balcony in Canterlot, but that's maybe a little too cruel to her (if that's even possible for canon-Chrysalis).

4351182 Ok, you have an actual, legitimate reason to use that subtitle, Electric Boogaloo. Do not waste it.

She could not figure out which was way up

Was and way are switched around.

It was was a

It was was a

"So, we any closer to making the spell work?"

"So, are we any closer to making the spell work?"
Unless it was on purpose of course.

She leaped off her her bed

She leaped off of her her bed

wobble and disort

disort -> distort
I guess.

"I think I might have made a slight miscalculation."

"Slight? You almost got burnt to a crisp!"

"It was a learning experience. Besides, I know what not to do now!"

Spike groaned. "Twilight! That spell's way too dangerous. You gotta stop before you really hurt yourself!"

I'm starting to think it might be a good idea to put a geas on Twilight that will let Spike stop her when she goes too crazy in research mode.:eeyup:

Chrysalis screamed and the changeling had to jump out of the lightning bolt's path

You may want to say she or the drone instead of the changeling depending on which you are referring to. I'm guessing the latter, but it's not clear.

"Wait, this isn't Canterlot!"

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

came out nowhere

came out of nowhere

concerned with had just hit

concerned with what had just hit

You perfected I spell

I -> a


This was fun and well written apart from all the typos and missing words. Here, have a thumb up and a fave.:twilightsmile:

4349870
A TODO comment, this is nicely appropriate.:twilightsmile: Reading it is a good plan too.

4353048
You would, but then you would be underestimating the effects research mode has on her.

4353247
You just won at the internet.

4353522
In a magical world it might not be as novel as here, but yes, it would probably still take a while.

Awesome read, definitely enjoyed it all the way through. :twilightsmile:

I would LOVE to see a sequel of this. Just so many possibilities available!

Bok

Oh hey, this made the feature box. Cool.

twilight has figured out the flying god thunder!:pinkiehappy:

Bok

4353247

That's the image I would have used if Twilight wasn't an alicorn in this story.

Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.

Bok

4354297

I honestly didn't expect the story to do so well. I'll probably submit it later when I'm sure I've ridden it of typos and grammar errors.

i really liked the concept of riding lightning, and the part with Celestia was kinda funny.

I know the Metallica song is called "Ride the Lightning" but you don't have to take it seriously, Celestia!:unsuresweetie:

I liked it, though. Very nice.

Did you hear that den?

Din?

"I think we can do the spell without all the extra stuff."

You know something is going to happen when you try to shortcut stuff for ancient spells.

This partially reminds me of the chapter in Negima! where Negi went and used his Lightning Form to fight Rakan. Maybe next time Twilight tries to do the spell maybe she should ask some pegasi to use some clouds purposely on her so that she can, I dunno maybe use the extra initial energy not used in generating the cloud to control the teleportation?

4349870 I see that you are Eclipsed in a shadow.

4350092
I can see it being a nice open-field attack for distraction, or maybe even if sombra shows up in his cloud form again she can just pop into and out of him and blow him apart.

Hehehe, this is great! :twilightsmile:
s6.postimg.org/dd47s96ap/Pirate_Approved.jpg

4352634
That was my first thought as well; out of all the stuff I've seen/watched/read where there's someone with lightning powers, none of them make it look half as badass as Eneru did, :rainbowdetermined2:

Because of how fun and wild this story is, it's easy to believe it should have a comedy or adventure tag, but this is pretty much what the mane cast's weekly existence is like, ain't it? Whatever the case, Spike should be awarded an Internet for his brilliant cataloging system.

A small, skinny changeling flew up to her, quivering with fear.

"Drink," she commanded.

I just finished a clopfic and totally misinterpreted what she wanted from the drone.

4352634

"Chariot for the gods" she says.

This had better have been a Twilightning reference.

I always enjoy when magic is explained and a new spell is made.

Well done!

24.media.tumblr.com/a257ad5165644b1f79354634dfdee284/tumblr_mqo61uYbwk1rj6vd5o1_400.png

~Skeeter The Lurker

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