It has been one of the closest guarded secrets of Canterlot's royalty. Deep in a specially constructed dungeon, surrounded by warding spells and powerful magic barriers, exists an enigma. Within a cage that could only be described as something out of a nightmare, it waits and watches all of Equestria. A creature that cannot age, is immune to disease, does not thirst nor hunger, and resists all injury. But, it also holds secrets and knowledge that could safeguard the kingdom. Its powers are frightening, but it is civil enough for debate when patience permits.

Princess Celestia has sought counsel with the creature before, enduring it making deal after deal for its services. The Princess walks a fine line when dealing with it, knowing full well anything could give it an advantage despite its imprisonment. She has had to go back on her word in these dealings, and from this a deep animosity between them has been born. It is a necessary evil as she is convinced this is a being capable of untold evil far and above anything Equestria has ever dreamed of. So long as it remains within the confines of its cell, her kingdom is made safe. So much magic has been woven to ensure that, there is little chance of escape.

So long as the magic holds, there is no danger. So long as the cage remains strong, the nameless creature stays enthralled in his cavernous dwelling. If that were to change--if the magic failed--not even the wisest could say. But one thing is assured, it does not bode well for Equestria.

After a tragic accident, a human ends up in Lord Tirek's body, as part of an attempt to reform the villain after his recent escapades. While the hero of our tale is trying to make sense of his new surroundings, the rest of Equestria thinks that the most terrible threat that their world has ever seen is back...
And the powers that be are definitely not happy about it.
New Cover Art By Shadow Bolt

There are a number of compounds the human body is incapable of synthesizing; these are found only in red meat. To save a dying human, Twilight asks her friends - except for Fluttershy - for advice.

A human wakes up to find that not only has he been altered in species and gender, but that he has also landed halfway across the world from Equestria, in an unfamiliar land.

This is not that story. Not yet, anyway.

A decade in passing and Kaz has gained a reputation as a member of a well-known group of explorers traveling the world. Not once have they set foot on Equestrian soil, and she was content to keep it that way, for her appearance would bring about unwanted attention from a few certain ponies and one certain baby dragon. So what happens when the rest of the group hears of unbelievable tales of Equestria, and decide that it's time they paid a visit?

An impending disaster, that's what.

Ahuizotl threatens to sue A. K. Yearling for libel unless she stops writing the Daring Do books. She makes him a counter-offer.

Based on the November 2014 prompt from The Writeoff Association, "Title Drop," the original version of this story won second place in that month's contest.

Semper Pie is one of Equestria's most honored and decorated soldiers. Protector of the innocent, hero of countless battles, champion of all ponykind. Even Shining Armor, ex-Captain of the Royal Guard, and Prince Consort to the Crystal Princess, looks up to this great stallion. Truly one of the best and greatest ponies to have ever served under the Royal Sister's banner.

Still, where did he come from? Where was he born? What has he done? Does he have any family? Why would he suddenly want to come to Ponyville?

And why, for the love of Celestia, does he specifically want to meet with the Element of Laughter herself?

This story is a sequel to Princess Celestia is in your bed.

It's hard to get rid of a sun goddess when she doesn't want to be gotten rid of.

Reading the prequel is highly recommended. Find Chapter 3 here!
Rated teen for mild language.
Now with audio reading by MelancholyIguana
Cover art by SilFoe.

My programming or my training did not prepare me for this. I understand completely what I must do to protect the people of my city, but when confronted with these...ponies, I am not sure how my directives work. But I do know that they live like people and feel like people, so I shall carry out my duties to them as if they were my people. And that is to serve their trust. Uphold the law.

Protect the innocent.

Robocop will be the older version and most of the story will be him from the first movie with some of the other two added in. Robocop will still be more machine than man when the story begins, so he won't talk that much or have too much inner monologue, but from there...we'll see.

Smaug is the mightiest of all beasts in Middle Earth. No creature can match his prowess. As the last of his kind, he has no obligations to anyone being other than himself. The only thing he cares about is his hoard.

But this new creature, this alicorn, may just change that.

She is the last. All her kin are gone. They'd either been blown apart by the Friendship spell so many ages ago or, in the case of her sister, changed their diet from hate to love. Cryoxia is the last of the windigos, but she is determined to be different, to never go back to those days ever again.

She'll make friendship from hate. She'll adopt an alicorn foal as her sister. She'll take physical form and learn how to move the celestial orbs with her mind. Celestial... has a nice ring to it. And she'll ally with the other nations in the world, establish friendship and preach harmony, no matter how they may diminish her food source. She'll make a world so wonderful that it will starve her to death.

Or die trying.

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For antiquity, featured 10/9/14, 10/13/14 -10/16/14