What exactly did Pinkie Pie do during the time she held Discord's power? An Equestrian intelligence officer leaves a message to her successor on what little they know so far. Warning: Superintelligences and existentialism

Author's Note

Inspired by The 21-Second God, though I ended up taking it in a different direction than good ol' Squiddy.

Charlie Stross Was Right.

Vaguely planning more stuff about the Equestrian intelligence services, recontextualizing all the episodes of the series one by one to various degrees. If I end up doing that, this story will end up being one of the capstones. It'll also be a long while before I start it, if I ever do.

Also left two (2) lines from literature in there. It's possible I left even more than that inadvertently, considering I tend to repeat cool things I hear. But if you catch them let me know!

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 94 )

Of course she's strange by any metric, before the embiggening. So even the assumption of her plans is already impossible. Only another party pony could hope to start to set up some insight to her goals, and as the agent's reported that would be a hollow hope in the end.

By the by love the story.

Pinkie the Ineffable.

Making sure even the Agency is happy?

At least the Goddess can look forward to enjoying the cupcakes again next time. :pinkiehappy:

The trick with the Grahams Number Cracker Computer, is to get it to make itself. :derpytongue2:

Brilliant title.

Are you going to write a story that has Equestria Girls Pinkie as a secret agent who's job is to research the portal and Equestrian magic in general?

I..I think this is.....I don't know. I don't know.


This is fantastic. Keep it up.

:rainbowlaugh: Perfectly Pinkie Pie. Magnificent stuff. Thank you for it.

Thanks! I'm happy to read you say that because for the longest time I thought Pinkie Pie was the pony I "got" the least. I think she's showing up so much in my writing as a weird way of me trying to understand her.

This is perfectly Pinkie Pie. :pinkiehappy:

This is indeed existential, but not in the way I expected (I was expecting it to focus on temporary Goddess Ponk's thoughts on her brief absurd nature. Not unlike--to toot my horn-- Are We Not All Trash Doves, Eating From the Garbage Can of Life?.) Very creative. And I see you just joined the site a few months ago. I'm tickled (pardon the pun) pink to see new authors continuing to produce quality content. Godspeed on your pony writing future!

AAAAAAAaaaaaaaa I forgot about the chaser. Perfect ending! :pinkiehappy:

Did Pinkie get Discord's powers in an actual episode? I haven't kept up with the show since season 7 or so.

It's in the finale, I got the idea for this the first time I watched it

I... I have some seasons to catch up on.

I actually didn't like Seasons 8 and 9 at first due to the change in focus, but it turns out that themes developed there are popping up in my writing a lot. They actually feature heavily in this story, thinking about it! The larger changes taking place in Equestria, the justification of Twilight Sparkle's accession, and the adaptation in perspective that not only Equestrian ponies living in their new society but also us viewers have to go through.

Nicely done. I really enjoyed this story. Keep up the good work! :pinkiehappy:

Thanks! Can't have a shot without a chaser.

And that applied whether one of us worked at the 41-Second Goddess desk or the Unreconstructed Changelings desk or the [REDACTED] desk.

So there is a whole desk for [REDACTING] things?

Wow, this was deeper than I thought it would be. Thanks for writing this bit.

If you mean Celestiaspeed, then thanks! I have a lot of plans for my writing future. Writing from the 41-Second Goddess's perspective wouldn't be possible though, since Her internal narrative is as incomprehensible and unknowable to me as it would be to any other non-superintelligence. Even in describing Her actions, I can only rotate the concepts so that they are legible to our narrow perspective, praying that I didn't break any load-bearing meaning in the process.

Oh. There's the comedy I was expecting! :facehoof: Oh, well. Like Pinkie thought-said...

Totally worth it.

The good news is that you’ve only got two more seasons left. The bad news, is you’ve only got two more seasons left.

I disagree. Sure, we of course only glimpse a fraction of what goes on within and without such a being’s mind and comprehension, but just as our human reality is perhaps a shadow of many higher dimensions of reality, and just as dogs can understand to a lesser degree concepts we both share like fun and play and also loneliness, or since I’m not really structuring this in any sort of elegant way, take Graham’s number, which 10537272 mentioned— far far far too massive to ever even be written out in power tree form, we still have clever ways of understanding and defining it, so too, could us very mortal humans/ponies have some understanding of otherwise lovecraftian entities.

Also, for another quite fascinating, philosophical, and somewhat darker take on Discord’s powers being related to knowledge of how things work, I highly recommend

Discord's power was something that always frustrated Twilight. All that power, with no effort, no cost. So when Discord offers her a chance to learn his secrets, Twilight quickly agrees. Unfortunatly all things come with a price.
Mister E · 5.6k words  ·  1,559  21 · 23k views

. It also has a sequel and a different-author spin-off

Ohh, you are GOOD. Have yourself a merry little follow.

i didnt see this coming...but i really REALLY should have XDD

Pinkie pie harnessing chaos magic was the funniest thing in that Season 9 finale.

It's actually the desk handling the Equestria Girls universe, but since its existence is unknown by the wider public in-universe, I'd have to come up with a code name instead and I was lazy. The rest of the Agency tends to not have a very high opinion of that desk for various reasons, and don't quite understand why the secret classification is so high.

Could you imagine. Literally, generations, upon generations, down to the next evolutionary stage of existence, on and on and on. Whole lives, dedicated to understanding, and stopping the 41-second goddess. and all she did was get a cupcake.

That's the idea! Reverse Cosmic Horror

Everyone was wondering but.. we were afraid asking the question :<

Comment posted by NexusEye deleted Nov 18th, 2020

Peter Watts is my favorite author and MLP is my favorite show, this story lives up to the promise of both its parents.

I am very happy to hear that! There are a few phrases in there that seemed obligatory to include, like "brownian motion" and the neuron count comparison. But I am really excited about the analogue of Wattsian vampires that I am developing as the background for one of my series. It really ties the whole world together.

When I saw what this was inspired by I was curious as to what would happen when you mixed the cheerfulness of MLP with the analytical cynicism of Watts and I think you did justice to both.

I am severely disgusted by those puppeteers in the shadows.
They try to control everything around them even if they have no right to, like a greedy control freaks, at in the end, they always cause the world ending catastrophe, because they either play with things beyond their understanding or offend very powerful existence with bad mood.


and all she did was get a cupcake.

No, the true horror is what was IN the cupcake. :pinkiecrazy::pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy:

When You Do Things Right, People Won’t Be Sure You’ve Done Anything at All.

Nobody tell him about the SCP Foundation

All of this... every odd occurrence in the universe, every oddity, every single coincidence, some random event, and this comment I'm writing right this second. It was all for the single purpose, of ensuring that Pinkie Pie got to eat a single cupcake?

That's so Pinkie Pie it's scary, and hilarious.

Because they totally didn't cause apocalypse in every second game about them.

Pretty sure the only thing the 41 second goddess did in her bored moment was create the universe Pony Life takes place in.

41 seconds of god power travel backward, forward and sideways though time. Nice little crumb to explain Pinkie Pie's weird stuff she could do. Good on the writers.

I laughed for a good 10 mins over this bit. Excellent!

if they were to ask Pinkie what she did in those 41 seconds they would have been left with more questions than answers

This is genius. I love everything about it.

Came for the ponies, stayed for the philosophy. As wise men and wizards are wont to say, "Not only is the universe stranger than we think, it is stranger than we can think.

I'm still pondering the metaphysical implications of how Discord, "world of pure imagination" advocate Willy Wonka, Goddess Pinkamena Pie, and Tay Zonday have all recognized the importance of Chocolate Rain but that's better left to higher beings than myself.

Oh my word... Send a medic, I'm dying of asphyxiation!!!:rainbowlaugh:

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