• Member Since 16th Sep, 2020
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Bicyclette


With a sigh, Pear Butter unsheathed her katana. "Master, forgive me," she half-whispered to her blade. "But I must go all out. Just this once." | pronouns

T

This story is a sequel to Sisters


Info

A Quills and Sofas Christmas Fic Exchange gift for applejackofalltrades with the prompt "gimme any applejack ship but DONT make her straight :gun-2:", spruced up from its first draft. Inspired by Space_Kase's amazing Past Tartarus and Back, which you should really be reading instead.

Thanks to daOtterGuy for convincing me to kill many, many darlings by not adding back in the scenes I cut from the initial idea, and to Emotion Nexus for help with the shortdesc.

Longdesc

In the future of the Crystal War timeline, King Sombra has finally been defeated. But the war being over just means that its wounds can only begin to heal, and all Applejack can do is give Pinkie the home that her family's rock farm can no longer be.

Sequelness

While this is a sequel to Sisters, it can be read as a standalone without missing anything.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 11 )

yoooo another bicyclette story. Added to RiL!

literally crying and screaming AAH bike AAHbike aAH bike!! wat! bike !! ah ! cry! wry! cr!

11117732
jay yr comments always make me so happy ty!!!

A sweet ending baked in the harshest of environments. Great job, Bike!

Home is where the heart is ...

“Oh wow, that is good . Even better than a chocolate diamond!”

As opposed to charcoal diamonds, with a flavor somewhere between burnt toast and raw dough. And not in a good way.

Rationed cheese raises interesting (and concerning) questions about how cattle were handled during the war.

Sorry. I’m not used to living in a house with so much smiling.

That one hurts. In a good way.

Interesting that Pinkie's going to Canterlot for her apprentice when Sugarcube Corner's still there... kind of. Maybe that final moment convinces her to set her sights a little closer to her new home. Or the ongoing postwar recovery means the Cakes can't afford a helping hoof.

Analysis aside, wonderfully bittersweet capstone to the previous story. Thank you for it.

I could be wrong about things I've never seen, but I'm not sure this story has enough darlings. :twilightsmile:

And yes, in case someone reading this is very ignorant about me AND very good at jumping to conclusions, I know the 'killed darlings' were things the writer liked but decided to cut out. So this story has fewer 'darlings' than it had before those darlings were killed. Maybe, I suspect, it might have too few left.

That is to say, I feel the story might be missing some things that might have been better left in. And my thoughts aren't telling my feelings that they're wrong.

[EDITS: This comment was repeatedly reedited during the first 6 or 7 minutes after I posted it.]

Standing on its own even without reading "Sisters," (and keeping in mind the related series episode) this comes across as a tightly written (and enjoyable) story on its own with some semi-hidden implicit "mysteries" and meaning that is unravel-able by a reader!

11118231
While obviously, opinions differ, I am pinging you in case this comment may contain something useful. If you have not already read the first story in the series, then a read of the first may help you read between the lines here. Accompanied with a close reading of this one, I was able to piece together what is going on--and I think it was a worthwhile exercise. The "ball"/focus is not hid unnecessarily by the tale; however, there is additional subtext, which some people will find enticing!

11118044
It's probably called Sourdough Corner in this Equestria. (Not that there's anything wrong with sourdough bread, quite the opposite! It's delicious!)

11118727
Oh, I think the story as it is makes sense and works.

(And by the way, I DID read the long description, and I DO still remember something about "Sisters." :rainbowwild: It's possible for two people to have different perspectives on something AND both be able to read and have done the reading. :twilightsmile:)

While there IS a lot more background in "Sisters," and this story provides some 'clues' in items like Pinkie's pendant, I think this story also works if one merely takes it on the obvious surface level of 'Pinkie doesn't expect to be happy on her family's grim farm with her grim family members there, or expects to be even less happy if she goes back.' And that's good! Most fanfics probably SHOULD work even if a reader isn't giving everything a close reading and careful analysis, and if a close reading reveals more, that's even better!

I think maybe what I really wanted was more predevelopment of the romance between Pinkie and Applejack, even though some readers might say the romance 'barely begins' by the very end of this story.

ADDED AND EDITED about fifteen to thirty minutes later: Really, there's an entire subplot about emotional (or romantic) transitions that might be hard to write more about, but which I might like to see developed more...even though, as I say, that might be hard to write. :twilghtsmile: And I know someone is going to say, "It's implied! It's there between the lines and you didn't see it because you can't understand SUCH VERY LITERARY WORK even though you're literally saying it's there!" :moustache:

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