Two magical prodigies cast in Twilight's shadow stumble about in somepony else's story and try to find meaning in their lives.

***

An affectionate parody of Tom Stoppard's Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.
Which is in itself an absurdist and existentialist parody of Hamlet.

Russian Translation
Chinese Translation

While at a slumber party telling spooky stories, Twilight learns of one story that is supposedly true, and just has to investigate...

(Featured on EqD.)

(Audio version by Thornquill.)

Once upon a time, (if the term even applies) two young ladies, (if that adjective even applies) decided to visit a magical land of Equestria, selected seemingly at random from about a million.

• One of the two is a time traveler deprived of her time machine, the other is an eldritch abomination out of her element.
• One would prefer the world of pastel-colored ponies to stay as it is, and can’t help but alter it. The other one is anxious to see how it can change, and can’t help but maintain it.
• Both believe that this is not their story. But while they disturb the delicate world of ponies, they don’t even notice ponies doing the same to them.
• Sandwiches are involved somehow.

There are many things this story is and some things it isn’t.

It’s not a fix fic, no matter what some of the characters think. It’s written in multiple first person narration, which happened for a pointlessly clever reason, that will eventually become quite obvious. It’s not a crossover, it just comes with an unhealthy amount of backstory. It could be a rational-fic, but since idealistic philosophy is typically not seen as very rational, it’s only a philoso-fic instead. It’s quite meta, in the original definition of metafiction: fiction concerned with fiction as a concept. In any case, it’s either a small monument to overthinking things – I’m trying to reexamine many fanon ideas here – or a digital paperweight, I’m not sure which. It’s quite a bit more subtle than it could be, and everyone talks way too much when they should be having glorious adventures.
I know how it starts, I know how it ends, and most of what happens in between. Readers say it’s a slow burner, but we’ll get there eventually.

Acknowledgements

With special thanks to my editors, Thainen, Shrink Laureate, and MitchH.
Further special thanks to ScarletWeather and Themaskedferret for valuable input.
The artist who made the cover image stubbornly wishes to remain uncredited, but thanks to her anyway.

It was supposed to be an easy delve. In, explore, and out.

Instead Daring Do finds herself wandering through an endless corridor, wishing for nothing more than to see the sky once more. And when she reaches the end of the maze, she discovers something waiting for her that hasn't felt the sun for a long, long time. Something very lonely.

And hungry.

A student of Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns stumbles upon a mysterious house in the streets of Canterlot, only to find it abandoned. Once the door has been opened, it can never truly be shut. Once the house has accepted him, he can never escape it.

His only hope lies hidden in the deepest chambers of Canterlot Palace, in this manuscript.

(A gentle warning: contains psychological horror and mention of but not graphic depiction of sexual activity.)

Cover Thanks to Beloved BonesWolbach

(Note: Shipshape's World is meant as a comical pony 'shipping' farce. One source of inspiration for this story was the card game Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder (TSSSF), by the lovely folks at Horrible People Games. As of this writing, I'm told neither Horrible People nor their horribly wonderful game are long for the world. I'll be sorry to see them go. Perhaps this story can hang around as a testament, but feel free to take this story about as seriously as you would take the game upon which it found inspiration.) --9/7/2015

"Shipshape, Shipshape, everypony needs a date..."

Shipshape isn't real. That's what everypony says.

Equestria is a land filled with history. Some stories are true. Some are legendary. Some are myths, and still others are mere pranks. Shipshape, the Matchmaker, is as much a tall tale as the Headless Horse - stare into a mirror, invoke his name five times, and you'll see an image of your very special somepony. Innocent playtime for giggling fillies or daring colts. To think any more of it is to invite a chuckle when you're young, and a condescending harumph when you're old enough to know better. There are some ponies however, who curse his name. The truth can set you free - but it can also crush your soul.

Some will win, and some will break even, but Sir Arthur Eddington's third rule applies - you can't quit the game.

Shipshape isn't real. But he knows you better than you know yourself.

Equestria has come unstuck in time and space.

The world that Gilda Redbeak knows has detached itself from reality. The true, Platonic nature of existence has become as thin and permeable as muslin. Strange universes are superimposing themselves onto Equestria, bizarre, hollow fictions with only the vaguest resemblance to the truth. Ponies replaced with crude facsimiles, a swarm of alicorns, hordes of green-headed men, pointless invasions by inexplicably evil leaders, sneering egotists in strange costumes, perception-warpers with vast harems, contrivances on an unimaginable scale, and... humans.

If Gilda can't stop this, the entire world will be replaced by something far more sinister, and also dumber. Or worse, the strain on timespace will destroy existence entirely. Either way, she won't be able to make the loan payment on her new scone cart.

With the help of an attention-seeking showmare, a frustrated draconequus, and a deeply-confused sailor from Worcester, Gilda has to banish these false realities, one by one, before they destroy Equestria for good.

Applejack has gone through a lot in her life. She's lost family, been a primary caregiver, even had a few massive shifts in her identity... And she's still standing. She's still here.

But is that enough?

When Twilight Sparkle was just a kid, her best friend was a girl named Sunset Shimmer. Though their friendship had a bit of a rocky start, they quickly became inseparable, no matter how much everyone thought of them as ‘weird’. They were there for each other.

Were.

Years after the tragic accident that tore them apart, Twilight is determined to move on from her loss, and she sets off on an independent research project to investigate the strange happenings at Canterlot High. Little does she know that she will soon come face to face with what appears to be a literal ghost from her past.

Coverart by Kare-Valgon. Chapter illustrations by Zorbitas.

Edited and Pre-read by Dubs Rewatcher, r5h, and Kalan.

Takes place after Rainbow Rocks, but was written before Friendship Games and does not take it into account.

Chinese translation

Print copies now available.

Octavia has a musical history and a side to herself she'd rather not have to explain outside of Ponyville. Inside Ponyville... well, everything was fine until she spotted Vinyl Scratch. What was she doing here?

Don't panic, Octavia! Don't freak out, don't lose your mind, don't....
Oh well.
(And check out Goombasa's excellent dramatic reading!)
Cover by Page Turner.