• Published 26th Jul 2015
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The Things Tavi Says - shortskirtsandexplosions

Let me tell you a few things about my roommate, Octavia. After all, she saved my life.

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Congratulatory Things

Author's Note:

Twilight Sparkle hops onto her throne, turns around twice, and sits down with a pleasant smile. A pleasant smile aimed towards us.

"So then... this is how I propose we go about it." She clears the gray from her throat and speaks with finely crafted gold bands. "We'll give each of you a medallion. These will act as tokens... keys, really. Think of them as genuine bands of authenticity, giving you free access to the Castle grounds at all times. There are... uh... some places that will be off-limits, of course. Erm... for security reasons, mainly. I'm talking about the basement... the armory... the guards' quarters... uhm... just about everything above the third floor. You'll need to make a request of Spike or one of the newly hired Castle Guards before entering the throne room we're currently sitting in, too."

Twilight winces, gulping. A touch of delicate turquoise bubbles in the back of her throat, then is silenced by ardent gold.

"Okay... so a lot of places are kinda sorta off limits. But pl-please understand, this is a work in progress! Royal Palaces don't normally sprout up out of the ground overnight. Even Princess Celestia and Luna don't have a rudimentary procedure for this kind of a scenario. I guess you could say that I'm 'winging it' with this new refurbishment project, if you pardon the pun. Although, all things considered... eheh... I suppose it's contextually appropriate."

I nod, listening silently with a smile on my face. I'm trying my darnedest with every fiber of my being to ignore the pent-up bottle of purple vibrations that is my dear friend seated next to me. Even Princess Twilight can't be ignorant to the inevitable train wreck about to cascade all around us.

"But, truly, these medallions are a sign of our trust in you. Present them at the Castle Door, and you'll be allowed inside. My plan is to have guards and secretaries posted in the lower levels at all times of the day to take care of citizens' concerns from all corners of Equestria. So this will quite literally be... uh... the Palace that Never Sleeps! And once you have your equipment set up in our new guest hall, then you'll be sure to... uh... sure to... uhm..."

At last, the ice melts, and Twilight Sparkle squints curiously at the mare beside us.

"Miss Melody, are you alright?"

"Eeeee-eee-eeeeeee—" Octavia's teeth remain clenched and her cheeks are red, nearly bursting.

With a sigh, Twilight smiles and leans back. "It's okay, Octavia. You're the new royal cellist. You don't have to hold it in any longer—"

With a violet burst, Octavia leans forward in her seat, unleashing a deluge of joy and ecstasy. "Oh, Your Most Esteemed Royal Majesty, I am honored beyond compare to take part in this most auspicious opportunity! I promise with every fiber of my being that I shan't let you down! You can count on my finely-tuned talents—as well as that of my dear roommate! We shall be the absolute best minstrels this Palace—or any Palace—has ever seen! I promise you!"

"Heheheh..." Twilight Sparkle turns, looking slightly my way. A tender wink. "I've had no doubts whatsoever." She giggles in a genuine blue burst. "You both had pretty much won us over within the first few minutes of performing—"

"And we will not falter! Perish the thought!" Octavia then proceeds to squirm in little lady hops, rocking her seat. "Heeheehee!" Just then, she gasps, and all the purple air gets sucked in as she folds her forelimbs together and blushes deeply. "Erm..." Deep, deep indigo. "By your grace, Your Highness."

"Please..." Twilight waves a dainty hoof. "Just call me Twilight Sparkle. It's what you would have called me before the tiara. Which... by the way..." She points at her head. "...I'm not wearing at the moment."

"Why is that, Your Majesty?!" Octavia genuinely gasps. "Oh dear! Was it stolen?!"

Twilight chuckles again. "Guess again." She shifts in her seat. "I think you'll find that I'm a lot less... rigid in royal pleasantries, at least compared to Canterlot tradition."

"Oh," Octavia mutters, ears drooped slightly. She catches herself and stammers: "Oh! I mean... but of course! Eheheh...!"

Twilight smiles and turns towards me. "Do you have any questions, Miss Scratch?"

I barely register her. I'm too busy reeling from the violet outburst a few moments ago.

"Psssst!" Sharp, serrated, purple daggers. "Vine! The Princess is talking to you!"

I jolt in my seat and shake my head vigorously. A nervous smile crosses my muzzle.

"Very well then." Twilight levitates a stack of papers from the round table, splits them into two folders, and floats them over to us. "Here I have... uhm... a few procedures that I need you both two adhere to. Just a few... eheh..."

Octavia nearly falls forward from the weight of the papers in her grasp. Nevertheless, she gulps and bears a nervous smile. "Yes. Quite."

"Let's give you... about a week to look over them," Twilight said. "Then, come next weekend, you can both set up your equipment and... rehearse a performance for the girls and I. Sound good?" Twilight smiled. "More than anything, I want you both to feel at home here. I'd rather think of you as fellow neighbors than... y'know..." She waves a hoof. "Servants. Besides, I'll have plenty of those borrowed from Canterlot, at least until I get a feel for how things will operate."

"Do you intend to populate the staff with mostly Ponyvillean citizens?" Octavia asks. She grimaces slightly. "Erm... if it's n-not too forward of me to inquire."

"Oh, not at all!" Twilight shakes her head. "That more or less is the plan, yes. But, ultimately, a few of the ponies working here will be from Canterlot." She gazes off with a prolonged breath, and I detect a hint of orange to her voice. "Hmmmm... and abroad."

I raise an eyebrow.

Twilight snaps out of... something, then clears her throat. "Yes, well, be sure to look over the medical requirements. They're the sheets that are framed with yellow borders. Per Princess Celestia's request, I'm making it a requirement for all ponies who work here."

I do a double-take. Frantically, I rummage through the pages until I find the sheets in question. My body instantly freezes up.

"Again, it's for security purposes," Twilight explained. "Should be pretty short and simple. And any subsequent examinations that might be required will be fully funded by the Royal Treasury. So don't worry about that."

I grit my teeth to the point of producing sparks. I feel a fire building inside me, and I begin to raise my hoof.

Octavia senses it. She senses everything. In a heartbeat, she speaks over me, drawing the Princess' attention. "We thank you kindly, Your Highness. We'll attend to this right away."

I flash Tavi a wild look.

She smiles pleasantly at me, then looks at Twilight again. "You have our word."

"Splendid!" Twilight hops down. "So then... uh... how about I show you around a bit?" She smiles pleasantly as she opens the door to a black hallway full of crimson soundbursts. A company of guards outside are setting up equipment, filling the armory on the far wing of the Castle, and the Princess tries awkwardly to lift her voice over the red cloud. "Let's... uhm... try to trot around the workers, okay? Eheheh..."

"No problem whatsoever, Princess." Octavia hops down, balancing her folder of paper sheets on her flank. She gives me a noteworthy stare. "Right, Vinyl?"

With a magenta sigh, I find my balance and trot sullenly after her. The folder weighs a ton in my grasp, but I try not to show it before the Princess.

For Tavi's sake, at least.

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