• Member Since 11th Mar, 2012
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GaPJaxie



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Ant Mill is a college student, stuck in a dead-end internship she took just to fulfill her requirements. All she does is doodle and wish she was somewhere else, but when she has a chance encounter with the Princess of Friendship herself, she gains a new perspective.

Written for the Title Drop writeoff event. Edited by the illustrious Cold in Gardez.

Now with a reading by Dr. Wolf!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 121 )

Completely beautiful. I think you've earned this here follow.

I wasn't sure if you were trying for the comedy tag at first :rainbowlaugh:

Also:

This an inauspicious start

Methinks a word slipped out. D:

This remains an excellent story. Bravo.

Ah, the directionless frustration of youth tempered by the age old wisdom of Twilight Sparkle. Very lovely. :twilightsmile:

Where is the warrior without war?
The laborer without labor?
The artisan without craft?

Washed away by the tides of progress,
Day after day, after day.
Until the end of history.

Good to know your break hasn't stopped you from writing things that are terrifying and beautiful all in one.

"When everybody's special, then everybody's special! And that's pretty damn great!"

I once again lament being unable to upvote a story more than once.
edit: I kind of want to see more of this universe, too. Not that I'm asking you to time away from other things to write it, of course; I'm just commenting that I find it interesting.

This didn't improve as much after the writeoff as Collaborators did, but it didn't need to. It was already pretty special (after some reflection it became my only 10-point vote), and the others are just catching up to it.

That seems entirely fitting.

Woomod #9 · Dec 1st, 2014 · · 6 ·

Pony society is pretty much diamond age, a modern society would be a massive step backwards in development.

This remains my favorite story from that write-off. You write an excellent Twilight. And I think that you handled immortality very well. That was a refreshing break from the usual.

5334454
Now we just need CiG to publish his story...

Alas, your own writeoff entry, while excellent, makes little sense.

Though I hear you have another writeoff entry which hasn't been published yet which is pretty awesome.

Hint hint.

*cough* Case of the Cowled Changelings *cough*

Sorry, got something caught in my throat.

I really like Twilight in this, how she handles her new role in this society she created. Makes me wounder what the other "Princesses" are up to.

I've come to enjoy the "Surfer Celestia" idea from the MLP Time Loops so I like to picture her at a beach somewhere catching waves and being hit on by all the surfer stallions (and mares) around.

And while I don't really care for the "Gamer Luna" thing I could see her being some sort of programmer. Long nights in dark offices and all that. Maybe even the major player behind the new computer movement going on.

As for Cadance... . Either chocolate production or holiday cards, maybe both. unlike some other things (*cough*QuillsandSofas *cough*) thoses two things actually make sense together.

You would think that Twilight would at least learn how to 'say' "Sorry, I don't speak Vespid." in Vespid if she can understand some of the language. But maybe she just hasn't gotten around to it yet.

Incidentally, I think "dead-in" internship should be "dead-end internship" in the story summary.

I guess when you're immortal, you want to try everything at least once, and that includes the seemingly boring stuff.
Look on the bright side, at least you're not working at Burger Colt like Celestia and Luna! :rainbowlaugh:

Cadance currently works in the oldest profession in the world.
(Being a Princess in the Crystal Empire, of course. Did you assume I meant something else, you naughty pony? :trollestia: )

earth ponies and pegsai too
a lot more earth ponies who studied engineering and pegasai

Pegasi is the preferred fandom plural, pegasuses is the most correct (Pegasus officially being a proper noun and therefore not having a plural form), and no matter what you use the first instance is misspelled anyway.

"They just cut down the last of the Everfree Forest!...."
Twilight took no offense at the pointed hoof, and gently pushed Ant Mill’s leg back to the floor. “Yes,” she said quietly. “I do miss the wide open space."

Er, NO. I enjoyed this story, but this bit really throws me. Ponies destroying the forests and driving countless species to extinction? Even if, unlike us, the Ponies don't need nature to survive (do the Pegasi now run the oxygen cycle along with their other duties?), it's still foul and out of character. One is glad Fluttershy didn't live to see Twilight shrug this off as some sort of inevitable side effect of progress.

Ant Mill, a most humorous and fitting name.

Ant is not your run of the Mill pony. *shot in the foot for that*

But loved the story! Great oneshot! Wowzers was there some heaviness in that last conversation with Twilight.
Also, if she's so old, you think she'd have mastered the changling language by now. Jeez, some egghead :derpytongue2:

5335431
I too liked how Twilight was in this story.

5335565
'Pegasus' is only a proper noun if you're talking about the one that hung out with Bellerophon. If you're talking about pegasus ponies, it's just a regular noun.

5334051

It did indeed slip out sir! But by your gracious commenting, that flaw is corrected!

And, thank you! It has a light comedy sprinkling at the start, but I wouldn't describe it as a [Comedy] fic anymore than every meal with salt in it is [Salty]. It just brings out the flavor of the drama.

5334072

The new "Collaborators" is better. All the Mortal Remains was way better.

5334191

Old age wisdom, or general crankiness? They look so similar.

5334204

Uh-oh. Poetry. If this keeps up, they'll find out I'm not a real writer. All my fics are written by a computer and an army of angsty teenage girls. Abort! *ejects*

Seriously though, I am curious what inspired this, what it means to you, etc. Poetry always gave me trouble in finding the meaning.

5334295

"Terrifying?" Come on, internships aren't that bad.

Unless they're unpaid. :trollestia:

5334358

THIS! This guy. This guy right here everyone.

He gets it.

5334414

I actually didn't have much in mind for the world it took place in, beyond a modernized Equestria. I may do some future-Equestria stuff in later fics, since I'll be doing more write-off entries.

5334946

It's an allegory. Or maybe a metaphor. Or a simile. Or maybe a sandwich.

5335285

Thank you! And yeah, I am very much part of the transhumanist crowd, so I try to handle issues of immortality with more rationalism and less of the traditional view. In this case, while Twilight may not have the power to make her husband and kids immortal, she's had 15 husbands and 15 generations of kids with which to grow used to the pain. It still hurts every time, but she knows she'll get over it eventually.

5335431

Ha ha ha. You caught me. It did actually occur to me several times while writing this that a 2000 year old Twilight would know every language there is to know -- or at least a few words of them. My justification is that languages evolve over time and get rusty if you don't use them, so Twilight probably speaks Vespid from 800 years ago. She just didn't want to say: "Forsooth! Greetings, warrior of She Who Will Enslave All Ponies. How fare thee?" since it hasn't been cool to use that phrase to mean "Hello," for awhile.

Also, in this universe, Cadence is a couples counselor. The best couples counselor. She also makes chocolate with just a hint of love potion added in.

5335447

It should be indeed. Corrected!

5335630

Cutting down the trees is as much a side effect of progress as the oppressive grey-suit dress code is. That is to say, not. Society doesn't always get better in every respect. The world shown here is boring, regimented, oppressive, status-oriented, and anti-environmentalist. But it's also safe, tolerant, supportive, prosperous, and equitable. Twilight didn't say "All change is good" she just said "On the whole, things are getting better."

5335708

Actually... not quite. An Ant Mill is when a line of ants gets turned around, so the lead ant is following the tail ant and they just walk in circles forever until they die of exhaustion.

It was meant to represent futility.

5336307

Well, now I don't feel so bad about how hard I was just outclassed. Well quoted sir.

5336325

It does seem like something Ant Mill would have scribbled in her journal, no?>

5336264
Nice! I'm glad you're still finding time to do some writing.
I was particularly interested in the changeling side of things, by the way.

5336310
Also, I'd imagine that they haven't chopped down all the trees in the world, just in a particular portion of it. Humans have caused massive deforestation but haven't really wrecked the O2 cycle.

5336143 Alas, our colloquial fandom terms have yet to make it into Webster's, so the definitive answer is still up in the air (heh). :unsuresweetie: Interestingly, a pegasus is also a form of currency, which uses pegasi as the plural.

5336362

Don't be so pessimistic! We'll get there one day.

5336279

It just bugs me when people unthinkingly add mechanical development to portray Equestria as more advanced, without looking at what kind of society Equestria has already and the absurd control it has over it's environment. (and to put on my sociology nerd hat, how that extends from their environment, namely cutie marks.)

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

You've got a "pegsai" in there; fire your editor. :V

Man, I still hate that first paragraph, but this is every bit as good as it was in the writeoff. Now you just need to set up a group where people can write stories set in the far-flung, racially diverse future, and the Internverse will be born!

While I can see neither Equestria turning out this way nor its Princesses ending up so marginalized, the last scene - when Ant realized exactly what it meant to be a Princess - saved it for me. Nicely honed, Jax.

5337537

The first paragraph is the best part of this story!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

5337617
Ugh, I hate it so much though. D: It's like every edgy OC trope fed into a blender on liquefy.

5336255
And what a wonderfully seasoned tale this was! :D

I also think you're the first author to claim two spots in my 'featured' list. Too bad I can't follow you twice. :rainbowwild:

Ant Well has slight shades of "Golden Age Thinking": "[T]he erroneous notion that a different time period is better than the one one's living in." (Link).

And since Twilight is basically from the Roman times, and the story's present is basically late 20th to early 21st century, it feels like a slight reference to Midnight in Paris. It was still a really good story.

5336301
Do Celestia and Luna still raise the sun and moon? What else do they do?

5338334

He can't answer that kind of question in the comments. He or you have to sit down and hammer out a story about it.

5336301

She would make the best marriage counselor around, didn't think of that.

And are you sure it's love potion she's putting in those chocolates?

Really wonderful job here. The first paragraph certainly got me hooked, and definitely set good ground works for the rest of the story. Ant Hill was a fun OC to see, definitely one of the better ones out there. While some of her dialogue along with Twilight's felt a bit drab, the solid pacing managed to make it not become a bore, so kudos for that. Overall an enjoyable piece that was a nice way to spend some time reading.

Oh, the feels you put in my red communist heart! It truly is the logical decision of an immortal who loves each of her ponies little as a friend to bring the wonders of her life to each and every one of them.
The feels, man...

You’re the bearer of the Element of Magic!

ex-bearer

:raritydespair: Demoon! You made me to phylosophize about fundemantal existential problems! You know it makes people very sad ?!

This was well done, loved the juxtaposition of the benefits of progress and it drawbacks. How yearning for an earlier age means wishing for a lot of people to be worse off. Both Twilight and Ant Mill were characterized well. Also for simply adding to the number of stories that have a non depressed immortal Twilight. :twilightsmile:

That was nice, although some of the conceits (such as that it took almost two entire millennia to get from "steam trains and gramophones" to "rudimentary semiconductors") were rather off-putting.

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