moviemaster8510
Joined 26th May, 2012 ·
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..........wat
What a title. I didn't know you could use that word out in the open around here.
4811881
You can use offensive stuff in the title and description if the story is rated mature
I'm okay with this
This story is equal parts endearing, hot and sad. The conditions under which this story was written remind me of this masterpiece.
4811885
Or if you're Australian.
>Pinkie's face when:
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw10841-roflbot_1.jpg
>mfw:
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw10776-00a64b5413c03c80ecf6b339df85b9fd.png
4811941
Or that.
4811961 Just like every story he approves does: it just did.
Well, first off, congrats.
No matter how it fairs, this fic shall forever be stuck in the pages of history and I now actually have a quoteable fic when people ask the question of 'What is your favorite fic?'
Secondly, it is further proof that story moderation is dead, and/or the mods can be bribed.
Thirdly, I demand more bakery sex puns.
That is all.
You were too drunk to write a proper story... I'm too drunk to fuckin read it right now.
Guess I'll catch up with this "piece of art" later, huh?
4812002
Clearly I am missing out on the money train.
How subtle. That being said, upvoted for sheer audacity and wtf-ness.
You had me at cunt. Then you had me even further by the amount of fucks you gave. None.
Yes. You have my yes. That is all.
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw7975-83069__UNOPT__pinkie-pie_faget.png
Stop being a degenerate whorse fucker u whore.
4812058
You have a few problems there, my friend. Let me help you.
1. Create a market.
Now, at the current time, far too many fics are being approved. This is an issue, mainly because if fics are being approved, then that means no oppertunity for selfish cash-grabbing.
This is an issue, and one that you should seek to solve.
Start off with one shots, rejecting them due to 'bad grammar', 'incorrect formating' or 'for fuck's sake, not another BIE fic with the romance tag!' Then you move onto rejecting multi-chapter fics, stating the previous reasons as well. Soon enough, people will get desperate to have their horsewords approved, and will be begging for acceptance.
This is when you move onto the next stage.
2. Advertising
Gather a group of seedy louts after some quick money/spots in the feature box, and use them to spread the word that a certain mod (you) approves stories in return for a 'donation'. This way, you get the information out that you are willing to take bribes and you are also protected from any other mods who are 'honest' (I know right? Suckers!) Soon, people will PM you about allowing their stories through, and then begins the final stage.
3. Profit
Start off cheap, with the rates between $10 - $20 USD. This is usually low enough to allow pocket-money reliant teenagers to 'donate' while still maintaining a decent income. Hopefully, you'll start off with four to five 'donations' a day, meaning a decent average income of $50 a day for doing nothing.
As time goes on, steadily deny more and more submissions while slightly raising your prices, generating more income and demand. Talk to the other story approvers and offer to take over the bulk of the approval duty, leaving them with little to worry about and yet allowing them to maintain their title.
If Knighty starts to get sus, offer him a ticket to the next convention as a 'gift', and then grow your powerbase even more while he's away enjoying the services of Ballpit. If he doesn't take the ticket, hire him a stripper.
Strippers always work.
You may reach the point where you go: "Taking 'donations' from desperate people is good, but it still feels like chump change." In this case, try some other options like:
1. Starting a group that promotes fanfictions with the promise of more likes, and sell places to the highest bidders.
2. Expand into the groups market, endorsing groups in return for a hefty sum.
3. Go full gangster and start offering 'Fimfiction insurance', sending them PMs warning them that 'fics have a terrible habit of being accidently deleted in server crashes round these parts, you might need some protection, Capich?'
Just some hints on how to improve your income, if you wish for me to expand on these tips then feel free to contact me. I charge a record low rate of $19.99 an hour, but for a handsome gent like yourself that will come down to only $9.99 an hour.
This service doesn't work for everyone, if you have any issues please call 09898973434 and our trained operators will work hard to adress all issues. No refunds.
supongo que cuando lees el nombre del capitulo no esperas llevarte muchas sorpresas eh?
This could kill me, but I just got to know.
4811885
Huh, I didn't know that. Thanks for filling me in.
*Jacks off, but doesn't see Pinkie Pie. Disappointed* Welp, at least I got something out of this.
I'll never get these last 4 minutes back...
You monster
WTF did I just read?
4812182 No no no; see, you've got it all wrong.
"Profit" is supposed to be step four
I just can't remember what step three is... do you know what step three is???
- Christian 'Abhors Gnomes, Underpants Variety or Not' Harisay
Well, at least this story is honest with itself. I'll give you that.
4812182 You put a slightly sinister amount of thought into this.
I have to read this just to see what it's like.
And that's 3 minutes of my life that I'll never get back.
oh god
static.fjcdn.com/pictures/oh_b96eec_1500743.jpg
Ecstatic.
I can clop to this...
4812318
Por cierto. Que mas hay para esperar?
... The advantages of being bilingual. :D
all of this is my fetish
Wat?
Is subtlety dead? Maybe.
Is it dead for this writer? Undoubtedly, yes.
You are trying way, way too hard. It just comes across tired, hacky, and really really 'hey, this was already done like twenty times by other people'.
I rate this a resounding 'meh'.
My jimmies remain unrustled, as I saw all of this coming with the introductory paragraph.
Predicting a feature in approximately 12 hours.
Because that's how this shit always works.
4812718 Words
4813482 With the amount of downvotes? I doubt it.
4813434 I really didn't care, honestly. I just wanted to take a break from the usual stuff I write and do something I thought most people would consider fucked up and fucking dumb.
It was a fun hour planning and writing this, and I have no regrets, especially since the fourth most watched author on the site read and commented on it.
4812646 The cake was delicious!
4814116
Kaka Carrot Cake.
Show him what for it mean to be....
Super Sand Legend.
4816329 FREEZY BRA
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4816345
Ow, my ears. Eh. *dies*
I will not say this is bad, too many people did that and I'm not sure if it is, instead I will say this: it could have been better.
4823767 No shit?
4823772 It's better than the drunk ramblings of other story tellers though. That counts for something.
The fuck did I just read?
4838227 Words.