• Member Since 14th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 27th, 2020


Just an old school hybrid spaceship/pony writing some stories.


Celestia's done the math: Prince Blueblood has cost the kingdom several billion bits in unpaid tabs, half-eaten cake and other expenses. She orders him to get a job to start to pay off his debts. And the only pony willing to hire him? The current manager of Sugarcube Corner: Ms. Pinkie Pie.

Uh oh.

Entry for EFNW. Winner of an Honorable Mention.

WARNING: This story contains no Minions, or Gru, or Dr. Nefario. It is NOT a crossover. But I do love that song.

Cover art by Dotterall.

Edited by Sharp Spark and Space Commie, who are unstoppable machines of editing might.

Produced by Cola Bubble Gum. Executive produced by Skeeter The Lurker.

This story is Royals-verse canon, but also works as a stand alone. No previous knowledge of Royals or sister story Rum Punch is necessary, it just adds some color.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 59 )

:rainbowlaugh: Magnificent. Though I'm triply surprised by Blueblood's lifespan. There's the initial shock, the revelation that Celestia's patience lasted that long, and the fact that three centuries of Blueblood's lifestyle hasn't killed him.

In any case, a great read, especially Ms. Harshwhinny. Thank you for it. :twilightsmile:

I actually liked this story. I would love to read more about Pinkie and Blueblood (Pinkie x Blueblood possibly?). Oh well, It's up to the author, not me. Have a like and a fav.

I love the scenes with the customers! Nice job! Also, :trollestia:

It's a good story...
... but you're 276 words over the limit for competition. :twilightblush: Just a heads-up from one competitor to another.


Ah ha, my friend, they don't go off the Fimfic word counter!

We are well aware that FIMFiction counts a bit high for word count, so as long as it passes on a more reliable word count program like Microsoft Word or website like Google Docs, that that is the word count we'll go with. So feel free to submit!

Microsoft word count: 2942.

Game. Set. .Match. :raritywink:

Hmm... Oh well, just thought I would give a warning.

4015967 I should have added that wasn't in one of the alternate universes.

Could easily be the last three-plus generations of Bluebloods all living the same way.


You've failed at every royal task given to you, which means that you have effectively been stealing your salary for the past three hundred years.

Unless he's been reincarnating with all memories intact, it's been the same stallion.


It's out! This was a fun one and I do hope you come back to it.

After all... I'd looooooove to see the day he had...

~Skeeter The Lurker

that is one seriously long-lived bachelor. Maybe it's the alicorn bloodline showing through?


Blueblood is a colt of mystery, chief of which is who is his mother? :pinkiegasp:

Obviously, he is.
There was an accident with some poison joak, an anti-time burst, and a broken condom.

Needless to say, it got complicated fast, but Blueblood has a grand future to look forward to as the source of an ouroboros loop that results in him becoming a megacorn, which is like an alicorn but with thirty wings six horns and the strength of every earth pony that has ever lived and several who haven't.

He's writing about it all and is planning to publish the story, everypony will love it.

"Go on, Twist, sample him!"

*wipes off computer monitor* I don't think this is that kind of fic!

After 300 years of daily cake eating and washing it down with barrels of fruit punch, how is he not shaped like a beach ball?


:heart::heart::heart: It's awesome and I love it


The best part of PG is being able to hide jokes like that in plain sight.

Awesome story based on a song from one of my favorite movies of all time?

And it's Blueblood redeeming himself?

...I don't know how to feel about this, but I love it!

1. Beautifully done. Had me chuckling aloud.
2. You, sir are a tease. Little glimpses into this world. I want more!
3. BluebloodXPinkie? The more I think about it, the more I like the idea. Charles II of England, anyone?

Ha ha! You've chosen poorly to make an enemy of Ms. Harshwhinny, Blueblood. A poor choice.


There are a couple of Pinkie X Blueblood fic floating around. I recently read one that was very good.

And then Celestia's plan backfires horrible (for the first time in 738 years!) when Blueblood becomes the Official Royal Cake Tester, and then there is no more cake left for her. :trollestia:

Comment posted by EnderKyle deleted Mar 2nd, 2014

Um.... Anybody remember how in the Grand Galloping Gala episode BlueBlood was an Earth Pony? Just sayni'. :derpytongue2:

Comment posted by EnderKyle deleted Mar 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by EnderKyle deleted Mar 2nd, 2014

If you wanted to make a series based around this I would certainly not complain. This was a fun story with a good ground for additional material if desired.

You can always delete some of them. There should be a little trashcan icon in the top right corner of the comment that you can use to get rid of it.

4020692 Thanks I didn't know that :pinkiehappy:

No problem, dude. :twilightsmile:


After 300 years of daily cake eating and washing it down with barrels of fruit punch, how is he not shaped like a beach ball?

The same way that Celestia manages it, I suspect.

I'd like to think I've been understanding for the past three hundred years. But now I think I have been cruel by being kind.”

:rainbowderp: Blueblood's immortal?

I don't know why, but I find that completely hilarious. :rainbowlaugh:

It's her day job. She burns a lot of calories that way.

...I regret nothing. :trollestia:


Perhaps she does yoga to cool down? She seems like one for the Sun Salutation.

Or you could...you know EXECUTE him. No telling how many "peasants" starved due to his greed causing him to take away so much taxpayer money.


This isn't saddle Arabia!

I'm starting to think you could write 5000 words of nonsensical gibberish and I'd still love it, Einhander. All your stories (and, especially this one) have such a light hearted, whimsical sort of style. You never use crude humor, or cussing in your dialogue, (Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen you string the letters 'F-U-C-K' together without a paragraph between them) but you still manage mature storytelling and borderline adult humor.

As much fun as it would be to write a wonderful essay about why this fic, and all your other fics, work so well, I don't think it's healthy, so I'll just leave off with saying I thought this was great and I'm really looking forward to what you manage to come up with next.

All the best.

(Also, I liked that you threw Twist in there. Have one of these kind of faces :twistnerd:)

4028267 actually I realized this is my first 'everyone' story...

Author Interviewer

Nice to see someone attempt -- and succeed at -- comedy in this contest for once. Everything's been so dour!

I just realized I forgot to favorite this. I feel like an idiot.

If you've enjoyed this story (and of course you have), you should check out the Royalsverse group for stories set in the same universe.

Any story with a hand drawn cover deserves at least a quick read, and this story definitely deserves one.

hey? where the heck did the other chapters go?:pinkiegasp: I WANT MORE!:flutterrage:

Customer service: A fitting fate for Prince Blueblood, I think.

Which billion is it?

That and I don't get where they think he's a slob just from that one appearance as well.

Was the part stating how old Blueblood is taken out? I can't find it anywhere.

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