SN1PSN4PSN3PP1TYSN0P
The students sit at their desks, curious as to why a lesson by Princess Twilight herself has been so suddenly announced and organised.
Twilight walks into the room.
Twilight walks up to the chalkboard.
Twilight grabs a piece of chalk in her magic. Then, Twilight eats the piece of chalk.
The students blink.
"Raspberries," Twilight begins to explain. She eats another piece of chalk. "So basically, essentially, whichever way you look at it, and I have looked at it in a number of ways, and I have even looked at it upside down which makes it look like a hook which is a good metaphor for it, it makes no sense, and we should probably burn them. Or drown them. Or both." She looks around at the classroom.
The students look at each other.
"Silence!" Twilight says, before they can ask anything. "It'll all make sense. Or not. I don't know. I'm not actually sure it will. To you, I mean, it makes perfect sense to me, but I don't know if it will make sense to you, it doesn't make sense to them after all, perhaps you are them after all, perhaps I am wrong after all.
"So you have your box. And it's a nice box. Is it a nice box? I don't know, I think it's an horrible box. It's empty and hollow and a failure and it blames other boxes for it. But anyway, you have a box, and it's your box, but it's not your box, so you put things into it. And things go into the box. And then they put things into the box, because it's their box, but it's not their box. And the box has things in it. And you know what? It's no-one's box now, just like before. Because the things you put in were empty.
"So you flip the box. Now clearly, you would expect the box to fall up. But no! You see, this is where they trick you, see, it doesn't fall up faster, no, the box explodes! It blows up, into shreds and confetti. And of course, you reverse it, you reverse the reversed box, and you get an implosion and clearly, clearly it fits, no? Clearly. You see, it flips. It flips. Then it flaps, and flops, and before you know it boom, the world is now the box."
The students want to do many a thing, but Twilight's magic keeps them immobilised and silent.
"Let's talk about layers. It's about layers. Because they don't have layers, but it's easy to make it about layers. So you have all these layers, and they all go into each other, and they pass through each other, because they're all flat and hollow, and you end up with this mega layer that's all the layers on top of each other. And it's flat and hollow."
Twilight looks around. "Halftime break!" she yells, and all the desks break in half.
"Let's continue then. So you have a mask, and it fits everyone's face, but it's no one's face, and why would you wear it? And they put it on the news, and they put it out for sale, and you go rob a bank of it and it's okay because it's not your face but it's everyone's face so it's also your face and then you take off the mask and guess what? There's nothing behind it. It's empty. There's no head."
"Gallus!" she says, pointing at Silverstream.
"I'm Silverstream," Silverstream tentatively answers, free from Twilight's magic for the moment.
"Well now you're Gallus!" Twilight points at Yona. "You're Silverstream." She points at Gallus. "You're Scootatwo."
Twilight walks up to Smolder. "You're Sunset." She grabs the dragon's head with her magic and begins to shake it. "There's a code to all this, you know? And it goes four one seven one zero one seven one. Maybe. Maybe not." She lets go of Sunset's head and flies towards the blackboard, then turns around. Then turns upside-down. Then turns thirty degrees to her left.
Scootatwo's desk is thrown out of the window.
"So you write an apology, when there's nothing to apologise for. Or at least, you say there's nothing to apologise for. And I say it too. But you write it. Unprovoked, never requested, just because you feel attacked. And in it you lie. You try to justify what doesn't need to be justified. All for a name. And I wonder if maybe the problem is in you. Maybe you're the one who can't accept it. Maybe you're the one who needs to find a justification, a higher cause for your actions.
"I hated you, but I have better things to do than poison my soul to worry about those who can't even worry about themselves. I would pity you, but I have no time left for it. Those that crawl behind you, I do hate, and I do pity, but they are many. Too many. And I forget that I am looking at the wrong side of things."
The blackboard snaps in two.
The walls snap in two.
The school snaps in two.
Ponyville snaps in two.
Equestria snaps in two.
Reality snaps in two.
Twilight walks over the broken gears of creation, as eels stare annoyed and disappointed.
Twilight stares back at Twilight. "Twilight did you break reality again?"
Twilight nods back at Twilight. "I broke reality again Twilight."
Twilight taps Twilight on the shoulder. "It's okay Twilight. This things happen Twilight."
Twilight waves goodbye to Twilight. "Time to fix things Twilight."
Time is a nonexistent concept in the broken reality Twilight has created, and Twilight rolls her eyes at Twilight, who should know better than to say something like that to Twilight.
Twilight walks backwards through the events until she reaches the desired moment. Then Twilight walks forward. "I broke reality again Twilight."
Twilight taps Twilight on the shoulder. "It's okay Twilight. This things happen Twilight."
Twilight waves goodbye to Twilight. "Time to fix things Twilight."
Time is a nonexistent concept in the broken reality Twilight has created, and Twilight rolls her eyes at Twilight, who should know better than to say something like that to Twilight.
Twilight walks backwards through the events until she reaches the desired moment. Then Twilight walks forward. "So essentially, I'm sorry I broke the chalkboard. I am still convinced of my wrong opinions. I will still be alive when you all are dead. I have duties I need to attend, but I chose to do this instead. Somebody help, I'm losing my head, my rhythm is poor, and the square root of nine is three. Scootatwo, please, when you redacted do a good job at it, I am slowly losing my mind after seeing the end of this world and of that other one in which I hypnotise ponies which ends with redacted and I'm still trying to get past redacted I mean I didn't think it would happen to her of all ponies and the sparrow owes me some recognition for that thing and I see universes crumble and turn to dust and I'm starting to wonder if maybe eating chalk wasn't a good idea but really I would like to point out how
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I have no words for this
I'm gonna get wasted tonight and come back to this, try to uncover the secrets and mysteries of life through your subtext.
derpicdn.net/img/2019/2/1/1950386/large.png
And that's what happens when you use a Word of command to force Pinkie Pie to make sense.
Which is why we don't do that.
Eh. Made sense to me.
Thumbed and favorited for the titles alone
Ummm...what?
wha?
My screen had a spasm and I haven't even read this yet
Yeah, I get it
Let me guess, twilight was working on something and putting a lot of effort into it and then a whole bunch of her friends got involved and then what ever she was working turned out wrong and when she tried to start over it exploded in her face and it caused her to see sides of her friends that she wish she didn't thus she began to doubt the very concept of friendship she had based most of her life on.
That what I deciphered from twi's crazy talk.
Quoi?!
Damnit...
I laughed the entire time, but I’m going to need to break out the brain bleach.
AGAIN...
Yeah.... no.
Okay
Did she get into the peyote again?
~Skeeter The Lurker
Seems to me like this was intended as a good representation of the "word salad" and leaning on repetitive phrases that are common in the speech of sufferers of schizophrenia.
I like it. It's like patter, but in a blender.
what the hay
Yeah, that seems about right
huh?
k....
9813493
you have the right idea i will join you in this endever to uncover the secrets hidden within the box that is not a box that is empty but full
Moral of the story: That wasn't chalk; that was a cylinder of compressed cocaine and a whole bunch of other recreational pharmaceuticals.
This is why you don't let Pinkie borrow your classroom.
9814137
hello darkness my old friend...
At the end of this story, Discord will end up owing a lot of money on his "there is no creature more chaotic than me" bets.
9815596
Are you doing it again ?
9814935
A sound that is forever unsounded, as spoken by the cripple who is whole.
9815843
is the whole cripple crippled or is the crippled whole whole
Could have been interesting but I think you just having her state contradicting statements over and over doesn’t make for entertaining madness.
What the hell did I just read?
Because it tastes like fish divided by pie.
random is not necessarily funny. i think that this story falls into that trap, unfortunately
9816027
Nowhere does it say this story is meant to be funny though. It doesn't have a comedy tag, after all.
And the story had just started...
And that is your typical school teacher.
...
Great, now we have to reboot Twilight.
I suggest hitting the reset button (aka booping her muzzle).
If you put the box containing your universe in the box from the other universe (which is of course in a box from your universe) then you gotta just reach through and swap them. And of course be very careful with what you do with the box--dont let ponies sit on the box.
Of course, it's turtles all the way down.
I don’t know why nopony understands what’s going on in this story. It’s all pretty crookedbackwards.
9816027
9815993
As 9814523 pointed out, this is meant to be a realistic portrayal of insanity. You know, terrifying and nonsensical to the sane.
9980767
If legitimate insanity and the discomfort it causes were the goal I would say the story warrants either a dark or sad tag.
I got the impression that she wasn't talking like that because she was mad, it was because she trying to explain something that is antithetical to the fundimental structure of reason and language to small children. She was also insane but that's not immediately apparent.
Is this a sequel to
]V[ ][ ]\[ ][ ]V[ ]_[ ]V[¤]-[
(Minimum H?)
................yes
ishkabible hippy boppity splap slap yygyhyghyghygytgtgffc
isantyugisantiyiyttsansatiyn INSANITY hippity hoppity this sheep is twilights property
( feel free to delete this )
okay so f = 2 and 4 = 2 so f =4 which gets the multiverse then you put the hay in the apple the eat it whle singing the sonic X intro song while drinking malk and playing tic tak toe
this is true insanity plip plop thsi si ym pots
da dadadadadadad da da dada adadaddaad baa plipppppppppy blooopppppppppy stop me
10614526
this is why twilight should not get wings or a castle or a school how did she even get the land to build it did she abuse her princess ness
insert shrugging twilight
10614528
so did we learn anything today
nerp
good now the world will self destruct
wot
KAAABOOOOMMMM
10614532
why
just why
after reading half the comments i can seneticacly say
this is pure random insanty personified who eats 11 and a half pounds of chalk a week
It takes effort to craft a followable insanity. Nice work!
Guessing Twilight's rambling was a huge metaphor for what actually (mis)took place.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Did Pinkie bake with Mescaline again? I wonder how the rest of the staff are doing ...