• Member Since 9th Sep, 2014
  • offline last seen Tuesday


Me. Take it or leave it.


Too many ponies in Equestria have committed terrible crimes and gotten away with it. The problem has become so bad that Princess Twilight has turned to the only creature in Equestria capable of delivering the swift, righteous, stinging judgment these naughty ponies need:


You are Corporal Punishment, the only human in Equestria, and you have the tools necessary to put all the criminals, delinquents, schemers, traitors, terrorists and lawbreakers in their places. Armed with a thick wooden paddle, a rawhide whip, a collapsible cane, and a bad attitude, it is your sworn duty to find every bad pony in Equestria and deliver a harsh, brutal spanking to each and every one for their crimes!

This is a massive collaboration effort in celebration of my 700 followers. Not meant to be taken seriously. Full of completely tongue-in-cheek humor and crazy moments, and may contain crackfic-style situations, continuity in only its loosest possible definition, and some kinky moments where discipline and punishment should be. Each author will be credited in the title of his/her respective chapter. Character tags to be added as more chapters are posted.

If you wish to add a chapter of your own, see THIS GROUP for details. :pinkiehappy:

Chapters (12)
Comments ( 94 )

why does this so perfectly sum up my thoughts on starlight? oh right, because its all true.

I don't think that you spanked Starlight enough. :rainbowlaugh: This is hilarious.

:rainbowlaugh: I had to read several bits out loud for maximum hilarity. I only watched episodes 1-18 of Season 4 and episodes 1-5 of Season 1 before I lost interest in watching the show... but this whole chapter more than makes up for it. This one of only two "Starlight Glimmer punishment" stories I've found that isn't a dark fic... and I've gotta say, this was terrific. I definitely don't regret my decision to start following you!

I don't know what to say about this story. Don't get me wrong, I do like all of your stories. But I'm not impressed about this one. Those first two chapters were just downright abusive.

Reading Chapter 2 made me question to myself, who hits someone with a frying pan? A frying pan (at least the big ones that I use to cook) is a heavy piece of metal, an object that is capable of causing physical damage. You might want to be specific of the pan's size and weight in the story and that would help. But till then, when I read it I think about the big heavy cast iron frying pans that I own. And reading that the main character was venting his frustrations by spanking her for a half an hour, how much times did Twilight get spanked?

The first chapter is a bit iffy (subjective) until Celestia got butthurt (no pun intended). That had to be painful, maybe not as painful as the frying pan but still really painful by the amount from a thick wooden hairbrush. That was 251 lashes from Celestia's demand. 251, not counting the ones before!

Those chapters were just abusive and, from a perspective that studied morality courses, taking into consideration of the severity of the punishment that was really unethical. Obviously not Saudi Arabia's level of severity but still unethical. Those two chapters were not funny at all.

I can't say that I've enjoyed the first two chapters of this story. At least the third chapter wasn't really bad at all and had a plot (again, no pun intended) twist. I hope the future chapters are at least as enjoyable as the third chapter and not cruel like the first two.

I'm sorry Lightning but even though the third chapter was better I still can't give this story a like. Starlight's not my favorite character either but I felt really sorry for her and wish I could have helped her escape. Same goes for Twilight, although she is one of my favorite characters. Don't worry, I didn't dislike the story or anything.

6936535 You do know this is not meant to be taken seriously, right? This is satire. Purely tongue-in-cheek. Not meant to be a serious story at all. Basically, it's more about making fun of me than it is an actual story.

6936544 Okay then, maybe I was taking it a bit too seriously. Sorry.

6936552 Understandable. I'd better make sure it says all that in the description, to avoid similar comments.

Comment posted by Darthdarius117 deleted Feb 15th, 2016
Comment posted by Darthdarius117 deleted Feb 15th, 2016

6936789 I'd prefer the gist of the criticism in words anyway, if it's all the same to you.

6936804 No i was gonna put a jontron video of him just saying "What?.... What the Fuck!??!" It was gonna be funny and everything!:raritydespair:

6936813 I've seen the video. He's funny, but frankly I'm not a fan of his videos clogging up my comments section. I understand your reaction, and I do thank you for reading in any case.

*Thoroughly reads the description*

"I've got a reaallly bad feeling about this"- Leia Organa

Why do I get the feeling this track is appropriate for this fic?

Also, this is fucking hilarious.

This is the first thing that crossed my mind when celestia became absolutely furious

Could have sworn i heard alice cooper there for a while xD

6938150 I actually never saw that movie, but I am familiar with that scene. Thanks for reading, and for the fave. :twilightsheepish:

Do one for the human CMCs for the Anon-a-Miss incident. Also one for Cinch for turning Sci-Twilight into Midnight, also dooming the world just to win a game and possibly for the other students her 'dismissed'.
My prove on the Cinch matter is this: In the Song 'Release The Magic', her first words int he song were:

I realize that you've always been an outcast
It's not everyone at school who likes to think
To find a student that's like you
I've had one or maybe two
But the good ones disappear before I blink

This suggest that Cinch did this before so can please add her in one of these chapters.

Seal your fate with your own words and chose your destroyer. Words spoken "she's prettier", your destroyer of choice a brush and a very jealous princess. Great work to the author.

6941100 I assume you refer to my chapter. In which case, thanks muchly. :twilightsmile:

6940777 I'm surprised no one has requested to do a Cinch chapter yet. But hey, she's not taken yet, so if you're interested . . . . :raritywink:

6940424 Nah, you're good. Thanks for reading. :twilightsmile:

6941636 Well, this is a collaborative effort, so if someone asks to do one for her, it'll get done. Unless you'd like to contribute a chapter, maybe?

6941644 I have an Idea in my head now but I'll send you something sometime tomarrow if not the following day. ok,

6941649 Excellent! I look forward to it. :twilightsmile:

6941909 Ahh, the man was a genius! :rainbowlaugh:

Oh, and thanks for the fave! :twilightsmile:

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