I thought I saw a flash of pink out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look, but there was nothing there. Had something passed by the window? Whatever. I turned back to my book. It was a guide to mechanics and was really quite interesting.
Granted, pony technology was somewhat lacking, but with my knowledge of Earth’s stuff, I was betting I could come up with some really cool steampunk-type equipment. I had my eye on a giant suit of powered armor. I’ve got an Iron Man complex.
This time I was sure I saw something outside the window. Had that been Rainbow Dash? The coloring was about right. I was still thinking about it when I was suddenly sprayed with water.
I jerked my head up and saw a nozzle on the end of a hose hanging from the ceiling. I smacked it away from my face, and the jet of water washed over the table in front of me, drenching a Daring Do novel sitting there.
I ran outside to get away from the water. Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash were rolling on the ground with laughter.
“That was great!” said Pinkie. “You were all like ‘Ah!’ and ‘Shitfuckdamn’.”
“Yeah,” I said. “You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you?”
“We’re pranking!” said Rainbow. “Everypony in town is getting it.”
“In that case, allow me to get you something.
“Oh come on,” said Pinkie. “You probably needed a bath anyway, right? No harm done?”
“Well, I suppose not, but Twilight won’t be happy about that ruined book. It was one of her favorites.”
“Oops.” Pinkie and Rainbow looked at each other and then ran.
When Twilight came back to the library later, I explained what had happened.
“Yes, they’ve been pulling pranks on everypony.” She sighed. “I guess girls will be girls.”
Speaking of, Pinkie came through the door at that moment.
“Hey guys!”
“Where’s Rainbow?” I asked.
“She’s off playing with her griffon friend. She’s sooo mean. The griffon’s name is Gilda, and I don’t like Dashie hanging out with her.”
“Are you really sure she’s so mean?” asked Twilight.
“Yeah! She keeps stealing Rainbow Dash away, she popped my balloons, and she told me to buzz off. I’ve never met a griffon this mean. Well, actually, I’ve never met a griffon at all, but I bet if I had, she wouldn’t be as mean and grumpy as Gilda.”
“You know what I think, Pinkie? I think you’re jealous,” said Twilight.
“Green with envy, or in your case pink with envy,” said Spike.
“Listen, Pinkie,” said Twilight. “I don't want to upset you, but just because Rainbow Dash has another friend doesn't make Gilda a grump. I mean, perhaps it's you, Pinkie, who needs to improve her attitude.”
“Hang on,” I said. “I’ll admit that sometimes Pinkie has restraint issues, but I’ve never known anyone to go out of their way to be hostile to her.”
“Well…we have to examine all sides of the issue,” said Twilight.
“I think I want to meet Gilda,” I said.
“Yay!” said Pinkie. “We can go together and you can reassure me that she’s not really as bad as I think.”
“Or something.”
“Come on!” She pulled me out the door.
In town, we found a table outside Sugarcube Corner to sit at. It wasn’t long before Gilda came by.
“Wow, what a mug.”
“She’s half eagle and half lion.”
“All ugly.”
As we watched, Gilda pulled a prank on Applejack’s grandmother. “A rattler!” shrieked Granny Smith. “Run for the hills!” She set off at a walk.
“She didn’t know it was a joke!” said Pinkie. “How mean! No, no, I can’t misjudge her.”
Gilda walked by a fruit cart and snatched an apple on the sly.
“I did misjudge her! She’s not only a meanie mean-pants, but she’s also a thief! No no no no, she might give it back. It's just a joke.” Pinkie looked like she was trying hard to make excuses for Gilda’s behavior.
I gave her a look. “Fruit isn’t part of a balanced breakfast for either an eagle or a lion. She stole that just to be mean.”
Fluttershy walked by, leading a family of ducks. She was talking quietly to them. She bumped into Gilda.
“Oh! Please excuse me.”
“I’m walking here!”
“I’m sorry, I was just trying…”
Gilda began to mimic her in a mocking tone.
I clopped my hooves together. “I’ve seen enough. Let’s go kick her ass.”
Gilda finished chewing out Fluttershy, who ran away in tears. “These ponies are lame,” she said, taking off into the sky.
“Pinkie, do you still have that pedal powered helicopter? We have to go after her!”
“No, she wrecked it this morning. I’ve got a plan, though. Nobody messes with my friends and gets away with it. This calls for extreme measures, Pinkie Pie style!”
“So…are we going to hurt her or what?”
“We’re going to have a party!”
I facehoofed.
That afternoon, Sugarcube Corner was decorated and ready to go. Many ponies were invited, and Gilda was the guest of honor.
“What’s the plan?” I asked.
“Dash and I set up all kinds of pranks. We thought it would be funny, but maybe if we can steer Gilda into some of them, she’ll get a taste of her own medicine.”
Gilda walked in. Pinkie greeted her with a warm smile and a hoofshake buzzer. Gilda laughed it off, but I could see that it irked her a little.
True to the plan, we did manage to spring spicy candy and a dribble glass on her. Things had begun to get interesting when Pinkie rolled a huge cake out on a cart. “Cake time everypony.”
“Hey, can I blow out the candles?” asked Spike.
“Why don't we let Gilda blow out the candles,” suggested Twilight. “She is the guest of honor after all.”
“Exactly,” said Gilda, stepping in front of the cake. Suddenly, the cart sprang forward on hidden machinery and smashed the cake into her face with enough force to knock her backwards out the door. The expressions of the ponies in the room showed surprise.
“You’re all lame!” shouted Gilda from outside. She flew off.
“Wow! I’ve never seen a prank like that before!” said Pinkie.
“I’m sure you haven’t,” I said, smiling to myself.
Author note:
Does anyone know why Hasbro decided to spell griffon with an o? The usual spelling is griffin.
LOL
I think it was intended to be a pun on given...
Griffin can also be spelled griffon or gryphon. Ancient words often have multiple spellings.
~~
I am many things in many places. Here I am not.
Well... I was planning on looking at some "adult" videos before sleeping, but pony more important.
“So…are we going to hurt her or what?”
“We’re going to have a party!”
I facehoofed.
Lol. Facehoofed. Gj so far, i'm enjoying these.
The Price You Pay - Savatage
I just looked up Griffon on Wikipedia, and it took me to a page about a type of dog. Maybe this is Hasbro's subtle way of saying that Gilda really is a bitch?
Goddamnit!!! It's not griffin!!!! It's GRYPHON!!!!
I think it was meant to be like Griffon The Brush Off...
also, griffin is correctly spelled gryphon
692455
Why do people make that mistake?
The usual spelling(s) are Griffin and Gryphon.
All three are correct.
476373 who needs /r/nofap? We have ponies to keep us goin'!
476373 i would totally lend my fist to you(no not punching)
but im not pinkie
Chapter 5:
I think they mushed the spellings of "gryphon" with "griffin". Thus, an "o" was put where it didn't really belong.
592955
that comment made my day
But he has only been there for two days.... How could he know that much about pinkie?
I enjoyed that ending MUCH more than the cannon one!
712474 Exactly.
2134458 I'm pretty sure he's been here more than two days, if you look at the beginning of last chapter and not skim it.
1024997 BlackGryph0n is a famous brony musician.
3703322 The irony between your username and avatar is amazing.
i really dont like the fact that our protaganist doesnt actually affect the world around him hes just a thirf wheel
3936631 This is true in the early chapters. Then booze, murder, and robots start happening.
3937170
What could go wrong?
"Does anyone know why Hasbro decided to spell griffon with an o? The usual spelling is griffin."
Because Hasbro has no so smart bro to help him out.
3994296 Best explanation I've heard so far.
I don't think would have made it pass the censors.
I might have liked the episode more if that actually happened in the canon.
The actual spelling of gryphon is as previously spelled. Griffin and griffon are both modernizations.
The original spelling (as in, before Hasbro even existed) is gryphon. Griffin is a last name, and griffon... is just ignorant people adding yet another spelling, I guess.
4154820 Griffon is slang for being sexually attracted to griffons. It originates from the phrase, "That griffin turns me on!", which became "Time to get my griffin on!", then was shortened even further to 'griffon'.
4284118 Can't tell if Fake or just internet.
There is no set original spelling.
I call my OC a Gryphon.
4154820 Well I didn't know there were three different spellings. I normally spell it as griffon. Wonder why one word is spelled differently for different people?
Maybe late here but there's a well established family of griffins owned by some other massive corporation known as fox so they wanted to be safe and spell it in such a way they can copyright it without worry
I like how your character though has thus far been useless to the mane story, no massive alterations yet
I realize now that for the ponies this guy must seem like a crazy hobo.
In Harry Potter it's "Hippogriff".
7274628
Well actually a hippogriff has the back half of a horse, not of a lion like a griffon (griffin, whatever)
So yeah *que rainbow star effect* "the more you know"
It's spelled griffon because hasbro owns all things and is as rich and powerful if not more so than disney and fox, and therefore if we question their poor spelling and bad grammar we will be reeducated.
I prefer gryphon, personally.
7417726 As do I, though I spell it other ways sometimes.
That ending was anti-climactic.
really, its the only complex thats worth having
8756024
Idk, Elon Musk is cooler because we know he's a fucking weeb and does all his stuff without a magical reactor... Though let's be honest, he's the type of guy who, given the motivation, would make said magical reactor for the heck of it.
I don't know, I wondered why but I never figured it out.
Either original or there’s a difference I think it has todo with the paws
I think it was for the pun "griffon the brush-off"
NOT IN FRONT OF THE KIDS!!! They'll learn improper word spacing, like COME ON!
You really don't. She's kinda a b*tch.