Existence is pain. Blame Shadowninjaman for my insanity in trying to re-write this. Please search for the non-old and cancelled version. Because I repeat, I'm insane. And so is he for managing to convince me.

Note: It's not up yet. Kinda jumped the gun here, but meh, enjoy this remnant I suppose!

An homage to stories like The Substitute Demon, ALL GLORY TO THE OVERGOAT!!!, and 1000 Virgin Mares, 1 Frickin' Badass Dark Overdude, Infinite Facehoofing

One thousand years ago, the Princesses Celestia and Luna were blindsided by the return of the Masters of Equus. The cult of power-mad alicorns, thought to have been banished from Equestria forever, appeared in the middle of the Princesses' battle for supremacy, and caged them away. The rest of Equestria quickly fell to their might. Even the fearsome Discord was forced to his knees before them. All of Equestria was enslaved, and an era of misery began.

Now, one thousand years later, a lone unicorn mare has learned of a creature that might be able to overthrow the Masters. A creature immune to magic, overwhelming in size and strength, sealed away for centuries uncounted. A creature of ultimate evil: the Smooze.

Unfortunately for Starlight Glimmer, in trying to ensure the creature's obedience, she modified the summoning ritual a bit too far.

Because of her meddling, the soul of a recently-deceased human is pulled from Limbo, and given life, but not exactly a body. Now he has to help her save the world, or face obliteration.

Not much of a choice, is it?

Inspired by Pen Mightier and Bucking Nonsense, the legends who – to my knowledge – popularized the "human in villain's body becomes Equestria's savior" genre. May your inkwells never run dry.

I've spent the past few years coming up with plans for every fictional situation imaginable, and with a 'recent' influx of X-turned-Nightmare stories, I've already come up with several but I never thought I'd be able to field test 'em!

Unfortunately, it looks like practice is harder than planning.

May contain beaten horse.

Tagged sex for possible innuendo as I usually can't resist.
Tagged the other bad things for the repeated failure of the MC to not be horribly maimed.

I've wanted to create one of those nutty over the top stories where the author blatantly doesn't give a flying fangdoodle for ages. So here I am making a lighthearted story despite all the horrible death and gore. Consistency of tone, I barely know her.

Living in Equestria under a false name and racial identity is one thing. Finding out you're not the only one of your kind stranded here is another... especially when that someone and the element bearers are looking for you.

Being my first attempt at a first-person romantic comedy, this takes a slightly different approach to the concept of being a human stranded in Equestria.

Enjoy.

Big thanks to DVAN56 for editing. Go check out his work!

Artemio Baldarich has always led a successful and entrepreneurial lifestyle. At the young age of 23 he seems to have the rest of his life planned out with his role as a computer scientist for a defense contractor in southern California.

Arty’s plans however encounter a major roadblock when a test on a missile defense system leads to him being mysteriously transported to a foreign world beyond anything he ever thought was possible.

Not only is he very disoriented, but he must also deal with the fact that all the creatures around him seem to think that he is a young child based on the body that he now inhabits. Hopefully he will be able to find a way to use his knowledge of his world to build a new life for himself and find a way home.

Edit 6/8/2017: Story was featured apparently. Never thought this would happen, especially so soon, but it’s pretty cool that it did. I’m a novice to writing and I truly hope that I can improve my writing style as I contribute more to this story. Thank you to everyone who has left feedback for me, it is much appreciated.

Edit 6/14/2017: We have an editor now! Feel free to check them out: Doctor Disco.

Edit 7/07/2017: Taming Equestria now has official cover art done by the talented Mix-up! Check out his work on Deviant Art here.

Ganondorf, King of Thieves, Lord of Darkness, Master of Evil and Wielder of the Triforce of Power, had long since grown thoroughly and completely bored with the path the gods had decreed for his destiny.

Time after time it was always the same, try and unite the Triforce, plunge the world into darkness for a time, search out and then kidnap Princess Zelda, watch his minions be defeated one after another and then finally battle Link for supremacy. Rinse and repeat.

All the while knowing that regardless of winning or losing, that no matter what he did or didn’t do, that in the end everything would end up repeating itself in another time and place afterwards, again, and again and again, in an utterly pointless never ending cycle.

Having decided that enough was finally enough, and refusing to continue to be a simple pawn at the hands of the gods, he vowed he would find a way to escape from his cumbersome destiny, a way to start anew far beyond the meddling grasp of the gods, a way to reach a realm upon which he could be the master of his own fate.

And after years of careful planning he had finally succeeded.

Sure, the fact he had to drag the know-it-all Princess and the green obsessed Hero along for the ride for his plan to work was a minor inconvenience, but he knew that sometimes sacrifices had to be made. And the fact that this new realm apparently decided to turn him and his two unwilling companions into miniature pastel colored ponies upon arrival also wasn’t exactly part of the plan, but he could cope.

After all, that was a negligible price to pay in achieving his deepest wish: freedom.

In this story Ganondorf, having grown sick of following through the motions his destiny placed before him as the eternal bad guy to be defeated time after time, seeks out to escape from his fate by breaking through the void between dimensions and running away from Hyrule to another realm entirely, Equestria, all the while dragging both Link and Zelda along for the ride.

Arriving long before the founding of the country, back before the events of Heart’s Warming Eve and at the highest point of the conflict between the Three Tribes, he and his two new companions will have to deal with a whole new world and it’s wonders and dangers. All the while this new magical world will have to learn to deal with its three new strange inhabitants in kind.

Just a warning: This is NOT a Displaced fic. All three main characters are the actual characters from the Zelda series that have been taken to Equestria due to Ganondorf’s master plan, and not humans turned into them.

Beta Reader: The Amazing Emtu!
Cover Art: The Incredible swagmu!
Proofreader: The relentless TranquilClaws! (From chp I - XXV)

Featured for the first time! 07/06/2018 to 07/11/2018

Now with a TvTropes page!

Edit: Crossposting at Royalroad where I have the same username.

The perfect gift for Thomas became the one thing that thrust us in this new world, I lost everything from my parents to my very life. I'm Anne, and this is my story on how I survived the game of a crazy creature and how me, Thomas and our friends saved the world.

Edit:Gore is not very heavy I will avoid gruesome details but violence and some blood will show up in the story.

My second story on this site. Crossover with Pokèmon enjoy! This is not a normal displace story, there won't be any other displaced in this sorry to disappoint whoever wanted that to happen.

Initializing....
Source Code Identified......
Playback Audio Feed......Operation: World Jump 2463197......Subsection; Mission Parameters......

.........Um, hello, my name is Doctor Daniel Phillips, and I am the lead scientist overseeing the Gateway Project, one of the most cutting-edge technologies in existence today. With it, we can open wormholes to worlds far beyond the reach of conventional space travel, and even into other dimensions if we can work out the right frequency. As of late we have discovered over a dozen habitable worlds that have been slated for colonization, but as of yet no signs of intelligent life. Yet I hold out hope that one day we might find such a world, however remote, and put our best foot forward in opening relations with our new galactic neighbors. Yet not all of the planets we find are poppies and roses, so instead of sending in humans to explore them, we have these little babies.

Oh, right, you can't see me because this is an audio-only feed. My mistake. Well, I guess I'll just have to explain it to you. These cybernetic wolves, known in our group as the Mech Hounds, are outfitted with the most advanced computers in the world, along with some of the most cutting-edge robotics and weapons money can buy. Now right at the moment we only have a dozen of these little critters, but don't let that fool you. Each of these little babies carries enough firepower to level a small town, although it would take them a couple days to do so if they were working alone. They also have the programing to work out almost any situation in a matter of seconds, although they still have many of the logic problems that most computers face when confronted with something that does not fit within the established parameters of their programming. Yet, regardless of their possible shortcomings, they do the heavy lifting upon initial exploration where humans cannot, dealing with threats as they see fit in order to assess the habitability of a planet for human use. I could tell you more, but that would be breaking protocol.

So, without further ado, I'll turn you over to our logistics specialist, who will be happy to tell you all about how these little babies are going to change the world, or rather, worlds, that humanity has come to call home.................

End Audio Recording........

This is a story that delves into the boundary between life and machine, where AI is something that has only been dreamed of, even with the most advanced computers available. Then again, these machines have never encountered magic before, so who knows what might happen. I guess you'll just have to read the book to find out for yourself.

I love to steal. The thrill of the theft, the shivers that go down my spine when I pilfer someone's valuable or rare object... it's an adrenaline rush.

Back on Earth, my job was damn difficult. Laser tripwires, security cameras, alarm systems, and armed guards were just some of the things I had to deal with on an almost-daily basis if I wanted to make ends meet. Here in Equestria, though... it's almost as if they want me to steal from them. It's a cakewalk. Even with Fence taking a portion of the value when he sells my stolen goods, I'm still practically rolling in bits.

Surely nothing bad could come of this at all... right?

[Third Person]

Commissioned by Canary In The Coal Mine.

After losing his last living relative, Carter Arvil, former CIA Agent turned real estate agent, is approached by a mysterious woman who offers to sell him a magical kingdom. Assuming the woman is simply a little unstable and selling a magical pony styled theme park aimed at little girls, Carter accepts the deal. A deal which immediately takes a turn for the unexpected as the offer was exactly what it said on the tin and comes with several major strings attached.

Like having to be a pretty pink pony princess.

Cover art by https://egophiliac.deviantart.com/

Featured for a frankly astounding amount of time!