[Third Person]
Commissioned by Canary In The Coal Mine.
After losing his last living relative, Carter Arvil, former CIA Agent turned real estate agent, is approached by a mysterious woman who offers to sell him a magical kingdom. Assuming the woman is simply a little unstable and selling a magical pony styled theme park aimed at little girls, Carter accepts the deal. A deal which immediately takes a turn for the unexpected as the offer was exactly what it said on the tin and comes with several major strings attached.
Like having to be a pretty pink pony princess.
Cover art by https://egophiliac.deviantart.com/
Featured for a frankly astounding amount of time!
Chapters (19)
Magic Kingdom for Sale? SOLD!
Hmm interesting... time for the next chapter! Hi-ho, Silver!
huh, a trans main character? this should be interesting
Don't forget to read the fine print
Yes, love that reference! And your 80's playlist.
Featured!
8957133
That was the inspiration for the setup, nice catch.
8957616
One of my favorite and one of the more awesome 'travel to another world' genre there is.
8957616 It was a delightful story. I'm glad 8957616 commissioned this or I'd have never heard of it.
Well Trollestia is a thing.
This looks interesting! An ex-CIA in charge of a magical Empire? I want to see her meet Shining Armor in the future - maybe she can teach the future prince a thing or two.
8957978
Something tells me that they already know each other.
This promises to be delightfully cute and awesome. I can barely wait for more
I looked at the cover and instantly felt the compulsion to post this:
I fell in love with the picture. The story has some big shoes to fill, if it wants to match so much awesome.
Well that didn't take long!
And yeah, Magic Kingdom for Sale is a classic. I'm surprised there's not more people that knows it.
As far as first chapters go, this one has a pretty damn big net to catch readers.
Those two are in for some major awkward moments.
Ok...at work now, but this is definately worth a second look latter due to the cover art alone. Who was the artist?
This chapter really needs Pinkie Pie at the end.
"And that's how 'prince'sses are made!"
8957133
That was my first thought as soon as I read the title.
8958012
I highly doubt it since Shining is supposed to be Twilight's older brother. Although that conversation hinted why Cadance like stallion with blue mane. I kinda looking forward to the conversation such as followed.
Cadance: It's OK, I used to be stallion. I know what stallion would appeal in mare.
Shining: ... (mind explode)
Ah! Magic Kingdom for Sale–Sold! I haven't thought about that book in so long I forgot it even existed! I quite like that series. And I immediately thought if it seeing the description of this story.
This had a fun first couple chapters! I quite like how the new main character is set up. A fair bit of references to the source idea. But still very very different.
How long is this planned to be? I certainly would be invested in reading a whole novel with this theme. Heck. I might just go back and read Magic Kingdom for Sale–Sold! to scratch the itch.
8958316 This will be as long as Canarie is willing to pay for. So far it's about 60k words.
I'll be honest thats perhaps one of the best cover arts ives seen of cadence in a very long time.
Well, I guess that the character choice makes sense for a target of a magical transformation.
Bit much of the comedy of errors so far. I feel bad for the both of them.
Once it takes off, the ex-CIA bit should be interesting...
The correct term here is unguligrade.
8958337
Hey, if you want to go over that amount, I'll pay for it.
8958557 Either term is correct for describing the terminal portion of an equine's limb (see the below info). But I wasn't talking about her hooves, I was talking about the shape of her legs. Digitigrade locomotion is responsible for the distinctive hooked shape of quadrapeds legs. This includes horses. Unguligrade is a specific subset of digitigrade locomotion wherein the creatures walks on the tip of its toes rather than all of its toes. But it's still walking on its toes, making it a digitigrade creature.
Also unguligrade is such an uncommon word that most dictionaries don't even recognize it as a word, including google's dictionary and all 5 of my spellchecking programs. It appears to be a term coined very recently, too recently to be a real word yet. In the end, unguligrade is really just a way to say "a digitigrade creatures with hooves". We all ready know that ponies have hooves so saying "the unguligrade pony" is massively redundant. Like calling an ATM an ATM Machine. The word unguligrade is really only useful when describing fantasy creatures, aliens, or chimaeras. ANd even then it's only useful if your audience is likely to know what it means already because unlike the word digitigrade they cant just google "define digitigrade" and get an answer.
3.bp.blogspot.com/_IcMoWTgbiZA/SwZSr7aPBAI/AAAAAAAAAEQ/OEpobVOQE_E/s1600/FrontlegSkeleton.jpg
As you can see here, a horse indeed walks on its toes. Therefore it is digitigrade. As for unguligrade...
See? Unguligrade is just a specific type of digitigrade locomotion.
8958587 The story concept can probably handle about twice that max before requiring a fresh idea for plot stuff. I'm happy to write what you like for this.
Holy mother-of-Faust it's reached the top of the Featured list!
EDIT: Minus the NSFW clopfic at the top.
This is really well done thank you for writing this!
Still up there an hour later? Dusk Vitae, Meep, that's pretty impressive!
I keep coming back to these comments hoping that someone will have named all of the references for me:
A wall mounted rack holding up seven non-functioning prop rifles including:
8958625
Now I'm curious about SFW clopfic.
8958703
That's how I feel with every single chapter of everything I ever do XD Only two people got my Last Unicorn Refrence in another story, for example. Anyhow, since the audience isn't playing....
A realistic sculpture of a robotic horse atop the dresser. Fallout's Gittyup Buttercup (and forshadowing of pony stuff in story)
A model Ford Mach 1 Mustang on the desk. The SERRAted Edge series (Urban fantasy with car racing and murdering child abusers)
A wall mounted rack holding up seven non-functioning prop rifles including:
A M-60 with a red bandanna tied around it, Rambo https://youtu.be/YJEbQwHGygA?t=40s
an Armat M41A Pulse Rifle, Aliens https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtFHWE_alQQ
a Mark IV Phaser Rifle circa 2373, Star Trek Elite Force II: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zE_BGilXiA8
and an M-79 Grenade Launcher. Terminator 2 https://youtu.be/nrahTQfHP_o?t=1m2s
8957302
Agreed.
I've lost count of the HiE stories I've read where the protagonist is fine or downright in love with being turned into an equine but mortified over a gender-flip, but I don't think I've seen the reversal happen even once.
Not that there's anything wrong by itself with using the old chestnuts, but it's still nice to see a fresh take on them.
I'm loving the story but I have ask were you where you found the picture of cadence riding the motorcycles?
8958817 The person who commissioned the story provided the image. All I did was remove a text balloon and add the "book" frame to it. The orgional unmodified version can be found here.
https://derpibooru.org/8460
8957302 Why does that make it interesting? If they're turned into a Mary Sue or pariah then it's just a typical agenda-driven schlock fanfic, no different than any other bad OC or self-insert.
8958855 That, or maybe the author isn't cisgender and was happy to write a character like her when the commissioner requested it of her. Besides, it's more than a little clishe to have yet another HiE transformed male human end up as a female pony. The story stands out more for not having a strait guy as the protagonist, sence that's what everything else in this genera of ponyfic does.
I almost expected to see something like [Draconequusverse ξ].
8958855
After rereading my comment, i realized that that it sounded sarcastic. I meant that whole heartlessly, as I thought reading through at transgender character's perspective would be interesting, as I haven't really seen that before. I apologize to any that were offended.
Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more
8958954 As a transgender female, anyone who was offended by your comment was looking to be offended and don't deserve your apology. Carry on :3
Murphy will be arriving shortly it seems hehe
On one hand, the longwinded discussion comparing the merits of Humanity and pony kind fills me with great joy. On the other hand... Eh, I got nothing. Great chapter, with great world building.
If Carla doesn't use her knowledge to build a working plasma gun, I will be very disappointed.
8959020 Don't worry. That's all the necessary expositing out of the way. ANd fairly organically, I'd say!
8959058
But will there be a plasma gun tho?
8959070 Uh, kinda? Of those Chekov's guns hanging on the wall, one was a phaser rifle. I'm not sure if you count nadon particle beams as plasma. But they would absolutely convert the air along the path of any given shot into plasma.
8959101
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/181/367/closeenough.png?1317606898
thanks!
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
(Do it again now)
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
(Gettin' horny now)