• Member Since 10th Jun, 2013
  • offline last seen Jan 10th, 2021


Just a pony being fabulous. Writer of vignettes, clop, experiments, a great deal of trash and the occasional gem


Twilight Sparkle is dead.
Twilight Sparkle is only slightly inconvenienced by this.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 154 )

Twilight Sparkle is dead.
Twilight Sparkle is also only slightly inconvenienced.


I only have one question. How did you manage to have both a comedy tag and a tragedy tag on your story?

I will admit, I kind of wondered about that too. :rainbowhuh:

Yeah, I could have sworn they were mutually exclusive.

Oh that's just evil :rainbowlaugh:

Now I am amusingly wondering if Luna, Celestia and Cadance also have the Grim Reaper as traumatized when it comes to dealing with them if in different ways.

That's Twilight...even Death can't really keep her from doing anything. such a smart pony! Only she could challenge Death and make him (her) cry.

This was far from trash, Lady Rarity. This was magnificent!!

Tragedy can have humor, at times, as well.

I know but I remember there was a time when FIMFiction wouldn't allow you to have both tags on a story.

Why is there a tragedy tag?

Oh, I wasn't aware of that. I suppose it may have been through one of the updates. Good idea to change it, though.

"The only winning move is not to play."

I wonder if Global Thermonuclear War is next on the list.

Here but now they're gone.

You don't consider the Death of Twilight Sparkle a tragedy?

9492013 9492008
Fimfiction is using the technical, rather than the conversational, definition of tragedy:

The literary term “Tragedy” shouldn’t be confused with how the expression of something being “tragic” is used. A sad story is not necessarily a tragedy when in writing. Tragedy involves the downfall or failure of the main character. This, again, does not mean that they die—the tragedy can lie in the failure to achieve something they have worked for through the whole story. The build-up to such a thing and the eventual failure is what the tragedy is.

It’s possible for a literary tragedy to be humorous, as demonstrated by Shakespeare (not to be confused with Shakespearicles) and others. I don’t recall not being able to use both tags together, but I’ve been here only a year or two, and I’ve never used the “Tragedy” tag.

. . . You know, this is a humorous tragedy—for the Grim Reaper.

Why you think this is trash I will never know. Sure, it could use some editing, but it's friggin' hilarious. :rainbowlaugh:

Also, bonus points to you, darling for being the first to catch the title. :raritywink:


A-aaand, at that point . . . ::grins::

I seriously needed a good laugh today, and this? This was it!


Was that a Sims reference I spotted?:derpytongue2:

I enjoyed this

I know the name is a reference to Don't Fear The Reaper, but it also reminds me of another song, "We Will All Go Together When We Go" by Tom Lehrer. Which is a lecture on the upsides of mutually assured nuclear annihilation.

The real question: How did Death, who has no doubt played countless games of Chess (given Death playing chess for souls is known enough to become a thing), manage to lose in two moves? I mean, I know of a set of moves that would do it, but it's really the sort of thing that only happens if you're TRYING to do so on both sides.

... if Twilight teaches all her friends how to play tic-tac-toe... she might break Death.

The mechanic or the person?


Ah, I needed this laugh. Thank you. :twilightsmile:

Luna probably forces death to play hours of video games...

"No, everything is fine, Starlight. It was just-" Twilight explained, but her words died in her throat when Starlight raced passed her to the purple alicorn lying crumpled in the corner. Twilight balked. Slowly, ever so slowly, she tilted her head to the side, absolutely perplexed by what she was looking at. But only momentarily. Yup. That was her body lying unmoving and mangled from the blast. She sighed. She was planning to go Bargain Books this afternoon. They were having a sale, but now it looked like she'd be a tad delayed. She hated delays. She meandered over to Starlight, looking the unicorn over while she sobbed and tried to shake Twilight back to life, clutching her in her forelegs and blubbering a soggy mess all over her coat.

Well, she's calm for somepony who just saw her own dead body. She's been through this before, hasn't she?

Also, Starlight's so getting traumatized.

"I believe you have to offer me a choice of a game to challenge you in?" Twilight asked sweetly. The Reaper sat down and began to cry. Not these horse apples again.

"No! No, no, no, no. The last time it was chess. Do you know how much I hate chess now? I HATEchess, and it was one of my favorite games. I didn't even know it was possible to win in two moves," he sobbed.

Seems I was right!

Also, if being an Alicorn didn't make Twilight immortal already this "challenge" ensures that she'll never die. She's too smart to lose. Huh.

Maybe I need to learn something.

"Oh no. Not hurt. Dead. She was dead. But she got better. Please excuse me. I need to go now." she said with a wide, cheerful smile. Then she slipped into her bedroom and hung up a 'Do Not Disturb' sign, on the basis of being disturbed enough already.


Poor Starlight.

*tries to hide snorts of laughter*

Ah yes, the key to immortality.

Tic Tac Toe.

Spike's a dragon anyways you can fire him out a cannon into a castle and he'd be fine.

Starlight could do with some more trauma. Builds character.

And nasty coping habbits.

Me: I would!

Spike: No, I wouldn't.

Hm. Perhaps that is the key to my own immortality insured. Apologies, well-written story.

Starlight raced passed her to


She was planning to go Bargain Books this afternoon

Given the capitalization i guess it should be "to go to"

robes and skeletons weren't known to have genders.

Well... there are differences in the skeleton due to gender... they may be more or less evident depending on species...

You! I can't believe I didn't notice you 5 hours ago...

That's what happens when one rushes, me thinks.

I love that song. One of my favorites.


Right on both accounts darling!

And only two corrections! I am getting better at this editing thing! :raritystarry:
Edit: I am not getting better at this editing thing.

9493156 *Alondro pushes on Twilight's chest. Twilight mutters something.* True love! She said 'true love'!

Rainbow erms, "Actually, she said 'to blathe'. I was kinda cheating when we were playing cards and figured out I was hiding aces in my wings before she choked on an apple."

AJ eye-shifts, "Ah didn't have nuthin' ta do with it."


I was really really hoping somepony would comment on that reference! I love you darling! :raritystarry:

Good story, although by the time the Grim Reaper showed up I was expecting more Bill & Ted references.

I was just believing that it was OBVIOUS where it was coming from...
I'm getting old...

Darling, you've no idea how badly I'd have liked to write in"STATION" at some point.

Any comedy from the perspective of the antagonist is a tragedy. After all, fate decreed they would lose no matter what they did.

And I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for you meddling kids!


Twilight, don't fear the reaper
Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain, you can be like they are

Cadance probably has him play lots of Romance Sims

Alondro #44 · Mar 7th, 2019 · · 12 ·

I won against Death in Tic-Tac-Toe. Twice.

I simply use my P50-level psychic powers to force him to choose an outer corner.

(Alondro has ascended to Lawnmower Man...)


*scratches head in confusion*

So, Celestia and Luna finally shared the secret of immortality with Twilight, I see.

Wat ?
All you have to do is be the one to start in the middle and the other player to place NOT at a corner.
And you've won.

9494482 Fool, my powers allow me to win when my opponent starts in the corner. Then I make them choose another corner. And then another. I innocently place my marks in horizontal non-corners and win. They're all like, "Ha ha! I control 3 corners! I have two ways to win now!" And I'm like, "Oh look, I can put this O right over... there! I win!" And they're like, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Curse this cunning fiend! I didn't expect him to win right out in the open like that! I'll get him next time! Best 2 out of 3!" And then the next time I win vertically. And they're like, "ARG!! He's... he's too much for me! I can't win against such ruthless and cunning strategy!"

Little do they know it was mind-control all along!


No proper wizard lets a little thing like death slow them down

Looks like Spike is going to learn some bad habits

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