• Member Since 3rd Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen July 27th


Wait, am I now just the one who wrote Mortem? 'Cause I think I'm okay with that.


Twilight finally manages to solve the problems with Star Swirl the Bearded’s time travel spell and decides that one of her first visits should be to see that old hero of hers.

Unfortunately, he’s not really what she was expecting.

Proofread by the wonderful docontra

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 70 )

Not only that but he was able to key into your specific version, either that or when you went back into time you made that parallel universe the specific one that his moves forward to.

And that's another one of your stories on my wish it had a sequel list.

Of course that Starswirl might be a Starswirl that one of the OTHER Twilights went back in time and met. Maybe you need to synchronize what you know about your meeting.

So we now know that happened to Starswirl the Bearded

Have to say that I enjoyed this

this needs a oneshot sequel of starswirl faffing about

Ok well, now I need to read a whole story about Starswirl being in the current time.

Hoping for a follow-up. This was really good. Starswirl as a crotchety old bugger instead of the righteous hero Twilight thinks he is.


And still beardless.

Well now, that was refreshing. Starswirl has a bit of a foul mouth, and thinks Equestria is full of idiots.

What a wonderful way for Twilight to meet her hero. I really like how you characterized Star Swirl here, and the ending was pretty good as well. Now I just want to see Star Swirl casually insult Celestia to her face and for Celestia to go from calm and collected immortal ruler to screaming banshee throwing petty insults at Star Swirl. Or something like that.

I've seen the idea before (Twilight time travels to meet Star Swirl), but never like this. I liked Star Swirl here- very grumpy but also very sharp and passionate. Especially compared to the naive Twilight (who cares about alternate timelines? :twilightoops: ). I do wonder how much of his "legend" is accurate or not (like whether present Celestia is just following "the narrative" or not), as Twilight did meet him relatively early, and he certainly got time travel down eventually.

I imagine when Celestia speaks of Starswril she's actually pretty honest about her feelings. Time changes a great many things, our outlooks and feelings are not static. Looking back Celestia probably misses him and fondly remembers even their conflicts. A life time of insincere nobles kissing up to her and the grumpy old sod who didn't worship her like some goddess is the one she really misses.


This needs more! I wanna see the shenanigans of Asshole Starswirl in modern Equestria!

Right. Still beardless. More like Starswirl the Scruffy.

You know when I first saw what this was going to be about I immediately had the thought of starswirl being like Rick Sanchez.Twilight goes back in time and she sees him over a chemistry set cursing up a storm.

"Yeah motherfucker, get it, get some, put it up your bitch ass, you fuck. Guess who just discovered a new element!" and he turns to twilight and looks her straight in the eyes and asks "You think you could do that, you think anyone but me could do that, ever in a billion years. You think if god existed he could do it? The answer is NO! Not god, Not that uptight bitch Celestia, not anyone! If god exists its fucking ME!"

Imagining that scene gives me such a smile.

This is awesome on many levels. And I don't usually say that about time-travel mind-buckery.

More? Pwease? :fluttershysad:


Moar to that.

That was a very fun read. I wouldn't mind at all if this story ended with a sequel. Hint hint. :twilightsmile:

Expanded multi-chapter sequel.

~Crystalline Electrostatic~


Sequel dequel

Maybe the reason Starswirl disappeared was because he stayed in the future?
Sequel starter anyone? Eh? Eh?

Lol. So funny! Very hilarious.

8445147 And so, Starswirl in the season finale is voiced by Justin Roiland... heh, he's just a wee baby compared to how old I am.

(How old are you?)

I am this many.....

(You didn't say a number...)


more marrrrrte mooooorrrrre

If this ever does get expanded on, I can imagine the beginning.

:trollestia: Twilight! I sensed some powerful.... Oh damn. So this is where you go to.


Starswirl: "Hello Celestia. I see your diet purpose didn´t last that much. A few cakes more and you won´t need magic anymore to make the Sun orbit around your fat flank".

I'm slightly perplexed by Pinkie in this story. Is this based on other writings of the author, because I was getting some odd ship vibes from pinkie, and if this is not being built from previous stories, it strikes me as sort of odd and unnecessary. I suppose I'll have to poke through author's other stuff to find out.

Apart from that, I absolutely love this Starswirl, and read his lines with a surly Irish accent. Why there aren't more surly Irish Wizards, I'll never know.

Anyone else able to figure out the ending with just this?

“Actually, you never finished it.”


Really? I'd have thought it was more of a Scottish, Glaswegian accent.

Sorry, I'm very sensitive about Scottish and Irish accents being mixed up, since I'm Scottish and have had far too many Americans walk up to me and say "I love your Irish accent!"

And No! Our accents are nothing alike!

Nice little one shot considering Star Swirl is going to be in the season finale. I wonder if he'll be like we've heard.

To be honest though, I'm not happy they're bringing back all these ancient heroes. It really ruins the world and history the show has set up if all of a sudden characters can just come back from the past. Having all these deceased but still important historical figures also added some realism to Equestria.

I wouldn't be surprised if the old heroes all come back speaking perfect english (although Luna had to learn modern english over at least one episode). I really hope their return is just a one episode thing. Otherwise in season 8 Chrysalis doesn't have a prayer.

hmmmm i want another chapter, of sunbutt show up or star swirl going to day court, and notice luna nad bring up her whole banishment and see how the current crop of noble are even worst or as bad as one he use to....

Ha! That was amazing. I simply loved how you made Starswirl so... like that. And did anyone else imagine him as a Scotsman and think it oddly fitting?

This actually correlates to our history.
In the 800s-1300s, Europe kept thinking they were high and mighty while the Muslims were in a golden age and the greatest power in the world. Eventually the Europeans overtook the Muslims in tech and led to Europe becoming a powerhouse while the Muslims were left with a bunch of shambles.


didn't you read it? EVERY starswirl, or nearly every, has a conversation very much like that one with a Twilight.

Probably. Maybe she's the original. But what are the odds of that?

And this is a bad thing from any other perspective than creating a conflict for the narrative to solve (i.e Doylian reasons) how?

Well the good guys in MLP are already a bit overpowered. We went from six "element bearers" and two princesses (mostly just one, since Luna was always asleep), to four princesses, 5 experienced friendship champions, Starlight Glimmer, Discord, a destructive alicorn baby, Shining Armor and others. If you add 6 powerful old heroes to that, including Star Swirl, how are we supposed to have any good two parters?

Did you already get spoiled on the season finale? Topic relevant because Starswirl returns.

I read Starswirl in David Tennant's Scrooge McDuck voice, and it was awesome.

Honestly, one of the more likable Star Swirls I've seen written. It's going to be interesting seeing the canon one this season .

I really hope you wrote more of this, because I am already in love with how you told this story! This was certainly a unique take on "Starlight meets Asshole Starswirl"!

:rainbowlaugh: Haaahahaha, ooohoho, man... I like this Starswirl a lot.
Good job :rainbowkiss:

Definitely an interesting spin on Equestrian history. I'd love to see what this Star Swirl has to say to Celestia. And Luna, for that matter. And I can only imagine what he'd think of Flurry Heart's existence...

A lot of stories ive read that have Star Swirl usually show him as this sagely Merlin like wizard. I prefer this one. Hes got personality and it conflicts withcwhat youd expect while making it hard to see him in any other way after having that

You forget to capitalize Equestria several times in the prose.

Aside from that, a lovely little story.

Personally I had him sounding like David Tennant's new take on Scrooge McDuck in my head.

Dangit, beat me to it! XD

That ending is tops. Hope there is another story where he gets to meet Celestia.

Hahahahahaahha yo... that ending was lit

*Star Swirl walks in*
(Celestia) Star Swirl *sips her tea* Still alive, I see. .... wait. *puts tea down* ....*stares at Star Swirl, then at tea, then at Star Swirl again, then at the angry Twilight* .....Balls. :|

Twilight was a bit taken aback by the response. “Yes, if there’s one thing I’ve learnt is that there’s good in everyone, albeit sometimes misguided.”

Star Swirl scratched the side of his facial scruff. “And where in equestria did you learn that? It took me years of studying the social sciences to figure that out.

I see the author of this story has never come across any true psychopaths... there are those BORN wrong. Nothing save death can stop them from following their bloodlust. The notion that anyone can be redeemed if you try hard enough is a childish and simpering sentiment from those who've never experienced reality.

8450137 It's a spin utilizing the way Europe in the Middle Ages regarded the Muslim nations, duh.

And, as usual, it takes a big dump all over Celestia and makes fun of her for sealing away NMM, Discord, and Tirek.

I would LOVE for one of this 'Celestia-sucks' stories to bother to answer the question I always ask: WHAT THE BUCK DID YOU EXPECT HER TO DO?! Gee, I guess killing them would be better! But, oh wait, the ELEMENTS did all that, NOT Celestia (and Luna, people forget that Luna blasted Discord and Tirek with them too)! So friggin blame the Deus Ex McGuffins for not turning all the villains into happy starry-eyed saps!

If Celestia's guilty of anything, it's not telling Faust to write better McGuffins for her! Sheesh!


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