• Member Since 28th Oct, 2012
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Particle Physics and Pony Fiction Experimentalist


This story is a sequel to The Brightest and the Best

Professor Crystal Clear, Chairpony of the Board of Examiners at Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns has always taken pride in running a fair set of admissions tests to accurately assess all candidates and select those most deserving of a place at the elite academy. Together with her colleagues, she has upheld the highest standards of academic excellence, and managed the school examinations with the utmost professionalism.

Then there came the day they met Twilight Sparkle.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 93 )

Fantastic, just like the predecessor. Clearly this means you need to continue this line of stories. FOREVER.

Apple polish levitated a bottle of Amontillado sherry out of the door,

Is this a subtle way of saying Crystal Clear feels they've walled themselves up behind a metaphorical brick wall? :pinkiehappy: (Given the ending to this chapter maybe she was really thinking ahead. :rainbowlaugh:) I also loved how you worked the story of the battle of Marathon into the legend of the Sonic Rainboom, that was inspired. :rainbowdetermined2:

Really glad you decided to continue this, I loved the original story and was laughing a ton through this first chapter.

Loved it. Great squeal to the original one-shot. Great comedy. :rainbowlaugh:

Poor Spike, not enough good fics with baby Spike included. Glad to see he's doing well here, besides the hiccups of course.

So glad to see a sequel to such a great story! And boy is it great to see callbacks to future episodes...

That phrasing feels so weird, but I can't find a better way to say it

...I am disappoint. I liked the previous one, and was hoping for something of a sort. Which it looked like. But you just had to spoil it all with stupid "comedy" about professors evading parents. Why. Just... why.
Why couldn`t have they had reacted like actual professors? As in, ponies tried and proven of their mettle in the fire of generations and generations of too bright for their own good college students. Ponies who can definitely stare down an overly impetuous parent and tell them to mind their manners and whet their patience. Ponies who would definitely have the wits to point out that what`s permissible for Jupiter (or in our case, Celestia) is not allowed for the bull (or in our case, everyone else) and if Celestia felt like revealing the acceptance of a select group of ponies earlier, it was her right and her decision and anyone having problems with it was entirely welcome to take it up with her.

I guess there's no tenure at the school. Otherwise, they'd all have told those stuffy parents they'd have to wait, and if they didn't want to, Celestia's the one they should be asking.


Mr Blue Sky here. :pinkiehappy:

You know, maybe that description of harmonic chaos as applied to metaversal Earth ponies wasnt exactly the best idea, especially when the basics couldnt be handled. Then again, its either at this place or roaming freely. :pinkiecrazy:

You know, Ive always wondered what wouldve happened if young Twilight had found, discoverd or been shown inverted virtualisation, where the induviduals power wasnt the limiting factor, only the trigger.

Absolutely hilarious, Celestia there doing damage limitation by redirection even as the old world is collapsing around her.

Magic is not created or destroyed, only converted from one form to another. So the Old Table is thrown out, the new one is introduced, and a decade later its replaced and the Tree picks it up?

Ah, bottle of Armadillo Sherry. Crunchy on the outside, Smooooth on the inside.

Just imagine baby Spike in student accomodation. How long before they found out he was great for garbage disposal. Eats everything.:twilightoops:

It truly is wonderful to see how far the professors at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns are willing to go to ensure all areas of education receive proper attention, and as soon as they've accepted the new students too. :trollestia:

“There won’t be any admission tests next year. I’ve had quite enough of them. I’ll make a magical talking hat which we can put on the candidates’ heads and it will tell us what to do with them. Or if that doesn’t work we will write their names on little cards, put them in the hat, and draw them out at random.”


And then there were a couple places where I was laughing so hard I couldn't keep reading. Added to faves and best of the best.

Interesting so far. Looking forward to seeing where this goes.

Plus they had a perfect excuse in that "The Princess has the clipboard with all of our notes on it, we don't know everyone's scores yet, therefore we don't know who will get in yet."

The predecessor was a tough act to follow. Not only did I have it favorited, when I saw the title and picture of this one, I immediately though "Oh! I bet this is a sequel to..." because I remembered it even though it was apparently published ~2 years ago.

This was nice. I chuckled a few times. I skipped a couple paragraphs because they were dull. And a couple of the jokes fell flat. But overall it was a nice sequel to an awesome, classic story worthy of becoming head canon.


Is this a subtle way of saying Crystal Clear feels they've walled themselves up behind a metaphorical brick wall?

I had to read that several times until I realised what you were getting at :facehoof: I love it when readers spot references in my stories which I missed :pinkiehappy:

Well... Being overpowered by a little filly does give a bit of a battering to the self confidence of a senior professor. Twiley had the magic ability to turn the leaders of Equestrian academia into a quivering mass of jelly.

...I almost wrote a sheet of words explaining just how wrong your idea is just now. But then I realized that the only way you could`ve possibly made that mistake makes it nigh impossible for you to comprehend why it`s a mistake.
People who are used to be in control do NOT lose all semblance of it at the first sign of being overwhelmed. No, their normal reaction is to roll with the punch and regroup and reestablish control, often at the expense of all who happen to be within the reach. Especially so, annoyances that are literally asking for a verbal hiding.

:rainbowlaugh: A wonderful farce that turned out far better than expected. Thank you for it.

How did Discord not break free with all the chaos you just caused?!?!?


So, wait.

You mean you almost wrote a full page essay on why this:

Well... Being overpowered by a little filly does give a bit of a battering to the self confidence of a senior professor. Twiley had the magic ability to turn the leaders of Equestrian academia into a quivering mass of jelly.

is wrong?

...Who the fuck does that?

~Skeeter The Lurker

I really liked this. Everypony was in character and it does make sense that the professors worry about another pony becoming like Sunset Shimmer.

This was hilarious on all points and very well written. The firefighting ponies were interesting too.


I love the way Celestia just remains completely unperturbed through all the craziness.

7130889 Her little ponies are always every where and all over the place. And this is WITH all the proper decorum, and all that stuff. Can you imagine what it was like during the "professor's time?" IE when they did the climbing-off-the-wall trick to peek into the staffroom? Or even during the... *shudder*
... the

The 80s...

7130347 Imagine you were one of the best and brightest in your field, with many years of experience.
Now imagine being shown up by a 6 year old who has surpassed you in EVERY way. On top of that, your boss just did something against your policy so now everybody expects the same treatment your boss just gave to very few, and assholes are quite literally knocking on your door, you know full well it isn't going to end pretty.
And then you say 'Roll with the punches.' First off, you're talking about HUMAN BEINGS, NOT PONIES. Second, have you ever heard of Fight or Flight? Not everyone is going to try and reestablish control, and their day has turned to shit in the past hour or so. It's perfectly reasonable for them to try and run from the problems, even if it isn't the first thing you would do.
Or have you forgotten that ponies are so melodramatic and skittish they'd pass out over a bunny stampede?

I`m talking about psychology. Any teacher in the aforementioned situation would have redoubled the efforts to at least seem in control, because confirming you lost control means unmitigated disaster that will be very long and problematic to solve. Children are pretty sensitive to that kind of thing and tend to go out of their way to keep you off balance if you let them think they can knock you wobbly.
Understand this - yes, there ARE people for whom the described reaction would be reasonable. But they don`t MAKE it to professorial tenure! Mere fact of being actively educating professor means you`re made of sterner stuff then that.

Call it nervous tic. I actually still entertain the notion that people can be reasoned with, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary.

I love both sides of this discussion. Yes, professionals tend to hold their own better but at the same time ~ponies~.

At the end of the day though, can you see some of these characters as acting in this manner to some degree? We see 'professional' ponies doing all kinds of stuff... including being silly, running away, and generally being useless in the show. For all the psychological backing of professionals, at the end of the day, they remain, in Equestria, as adorably silly ponies... because they don't have to play hardball with the world we live in.

<grins and pokes a whimpering Royal guard, pride of Equestria's Military and last line of defense for the royal family> Silly pony... you got gooped and didn't even try to remove the armor it was stuck too.



Even in the 80's, I imagine that Celestia was perfectly calm through everything. After all, even at its worst, it was nothing compared to Discord's reign...

Uh... NO. That`s my issue with this story. I simply can NOT see any professor climbing out of window with nothing but ivy for support to escape something so insignificant as annoying people. Try as I might, I just can`t see anyone so insecure they`d rather risk their life then face a person making unreasonable demands being able to teach anyone anything.

On hearing this news, two pegasus fireponies took off immediately on a rescue mission.

Fireponies Gage and DeSoto? ( 70s TV reference, heh)

7131417 Have you ever worked in customer service?

Utterly fantastic and hilarious.

Also, now I want ice cream.

It is the middle of the night.


Damn you.

7131417 Until you've worked in customer service... heh. There's a lot of stuff I'll do to get away from some self-righteous asshole. However, in this case, I would have simply told her "No, your daughter has no place, now buck off".

not bad but I really feel it could have been better. It was to random, no one ever got a chance to deal with the shock they had just experienced

Even only a minute after he hatched, people ignore Spike.

being meguca spik is sufering

Although near-instantly going from true baby to adult is a great reason for why Spike is so intelligent and mature at times, despite being incredibly immature at others, and is still considered a baby dragon despite being ~CMC age.

You seriously can't accept any DRUNK professor doing that?

7131306 Yeah, but that's why I"m saying that she's kind of non-chalant. I'm in the bleachers of "Celestia does and doesn't do stuff for a reason" party.

7132033 7132132
I AM working at customer service. Been techsupporting for last five years. Haven`t been a customer yet that would make me run away. Altercations? Sure. Yelling, threats, hysterics. All par of the course. Even a knife fight once. But trying to go out of the window just because someone`s demanding things they can`t legally force? Heh. No way in hell. I`d lose any semblance of respect for whoever tried that. (And obviously enough, wouldn`t try something that cowardly and stupid under any circumstances whatsoever.)

No. Drinking does not change your psychotype, it merely lowers the inhibitions.
Besides, they didn`t drink nearly enough to show any considerable loss of restraint either - motile control goes at the same time - if they drank enough to actually do stupid things, they`d never manage the ivy climbing.
Look. It`s hard enough to climb somewhere with the ladder, especially if you`re going down. With no support but ivy? Professional acrobats would be iffy at such a task. For professors who are not in a habit of keeping themselves at ridiculously fit shape, it`s almost guaranteed fall. I don`t believe anyone intelligent and capable enough to earn a professor title would actually consider something so hazardous without a 100% guaranteed death if they don`t - like fire or some other disaster that clearly won`t leave them any chance of survival unless they try the window. Not even drunk professors.

You'd better put your old musty books and go drinking with friends. You have some pretty advanced theories about drinking, but they... uh, show a certain disconnect with the reality. A rather severe disconnect.

I don't care what the other neihsayers complain about. This is hilariously epic.

He teaches russian about drinking... Heh.
How`d the saying went?
Ah, yes. Don`t teach grandma to suck eggs, youngster.



Drinking does not change your psychotype, it merely lowers the inhibitions.

Yeah, because no person gets aggressive while drunk, no person ever makes decisions they wouldn't make if not inhibitions alone, no drunk ever panics in a situation they'd normally tackle competently, none outright forgets an important detail they'd obviously remember while sober, none tackles a challenge which they'd normally logically reject as impossible. It's just inhibitions.

The phrase "Impaired judgment" ringing a bell?

No amount of alcohol can change who you are.
If you get violent when you`re drunk it`s not "alcohol changed me", it`s you being violent by nature. Alcohol merely disables the restraint of reason on it.
Decisions made under influence of alcohol are of the same venue - they are the decision person WANTS to make. While sober, they can realize that making those decisions will harm/embarrass them, but the desire to do it regardless does not go anywhere - it simply stays in background. Getting rid of those for good is long and involved process and a big reason why "self-destructive behavior" is a big thing in psychology studies.

Your argument is that drunk professors (Drunk of one glass of sherry each, by the way? That makes them ridiculous lightweights and if they were such, it`s highly likely they`d be very much disinclined to even touch alcohol, much less go for it as a first mean of stress relief.) spontaneously decided to run away from people they routinely stare down and reduce to awkward mess? Yeah, right.

Understand one thing - dealing with irrational and irate parents is not something unusual for anyone in education. It`s not a thing you fear - it`s an annoyance you weather.

In short, to quote Stanislavsky -"Not believing!"

I think it's time to stop this. Cytotoxin - you explained why my story did not work for you, and I thank you for the honest, if rather blunt, feedback. Others have explained why they do not share your opinion and I thank them for their support. If you feel the need to further clarify your opinions to one another, please could you do it by PM? It's now time to move on, and go and get an ice cream.

7134033 I`m perfectly willing to put an end to this so long as no one else baits me.

“These are my friends Jet Set and Upper Crust. We request that you inform us of the result of the admission tests.”
Crystal's Wishes?

“There won’t be any admission tests next year. I’ve had quite enough of them. I’ll make a magical talking hat which we can put on the candidates’ heads and it will tell us what to do with them.

P.S: Too bad there is not a image of Twilight under the hat or something like that

Man, a lot of arguing for a silly part in a story about alien ponies that teach magic in a world where the most powerful force is friendship and rainbow necklaces.

I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Now I want to read a story like this about the teachers having to deal with a decade or more of Twilight Sparkle, and how they slowly turn into alcoholics.

I think it was fairly representative of the academic class: CYOA.

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